Wakas

I frowned upon noticing a familiar name on my friend requests.

Leviticus Kile

Muntik ko na i-buga ang iniinom kong softdrink. Nasamid ako at agad na umubo-ubo para maibsan ito. My eyes broadened because of the name on the list. Sinilip ko ang profile nito kasi baka naman fan account lang.

It was a picture of a young boy who was plucking the strings of his electric guitar. It was black and white which was Kile's signature color. Sa lahat ng kabanda n'ya, siya lang ang gumagamit ng ganitong kulay. Kailan lang naman siya nagkaroon ng kulay sa Instagram. I pursed my lips, it was the picture of Philo! Kapal ng mukha mo, lodi!

I clicked accept. At agad na tumunog ang notification na may nag-message sa akin kaya naman lalong lumalim ang kunot sa aking noo.

Leviticus Kile:

hoy ano

pwede ba tayo magusap?

Iscalade Altreano:

ikaw talaga 'yan???

promise, usap lang???

Leviticus Kile:

Da fuq? (｡ì _ í｡)

uu, ano pa ba sa tingin mo¿¿

"Philo..." I called my love who was seating infront of me. Nilalamutak ang fries na nasa plato niya. She lifted her gaze at me and smiled. Kasama ko siya ngayon dahil wala s'yang pasok at inaya n'ya akong kumain sa labas.

"Po?"

"Biblical ba first name ni Kile?" tanong ko sa kan'ya.

She gulped, mukhang kinabahan sa aking tanong. She looked hesitant to answer.

"Opo 'yata?"

"Leviticus?" binasa ko ang pangalan ni Kile. She gradually nodded, her face contorts into confusion.

"Uh, paano mo po nalaman?"

"Someone added me," I shared. "Gano'n ang pangalan. Hindi ko alam kung si Kile ba talaga..."

Biglang umakyat ang kaba sa dibdib ko. Hindi naman siguro base sa biblical names ang labanan 'di ba? Hindi naman siguro siya dagdag points sa langit? O dagdag points kay Philomena?

Pero bakit naman ako kakabahan, halos girlfriend ko naman na si Philomena?

My phone vibrated, I received another message from the same account.

Leviticus Kile:

don't worry, i have no ties with her parents.

My heart thudded against my chest. Her parents were immensely worried that she was kidnapped or something bad happened to her. Pero hindi ko alam kung dapat ko bang sabihin na alam ko na kung nasaan si Philo. Philo is a rational person; most of the time, she doesn't create decisions based only on her whims. Kaya naman nakakapagtaka na bigla siyang maglalayas. Until now, hindi n'ya sinasabi sa akin kung bakit pinili n'yang umalis na lamang sa bahay nila. She still clearly loves them.

Iscalade Altreano:

sige sige. 😔 ano ba 'yon, lodi?

As I entered those words. Bigla akong tinubuan ng hiya. Did I just? Fuck. Nakakahiya nga! Pero imbis na bawiin ko ay pinanindigan ko na lang.

Iscalade changed Leviticus Kile to Ang Tanging Lodi Ko

Kile changed your nickname to my bestie

my bestie:

pota ka

Ang Tanging Lodi Ko:

o baket sino nauna

my bestie:

um, gusto ko sana mag-sorry kasi ano i judge you agad alam mo na selos things pero we cool naman di ba? 🙁 🥺

Ang Tanging Lodi Ko:

gagu ka ba

di ko talaga alam ano nakita sayo ni philo mukha ka namang tuta

pero uu we cool bruh ! ikaw 'yung mahal e. basta masaya siya.

Beads of sweat started forming in my forehead. Lalo lamang akong kinakain ng kaba. Napalingon ako kay Philomena na nanatiling nakakunot ang noo at nakatingin sa akin.

my bestie:

true ba talaga 🥺✌

sinabi niya sa 'yo?

bati na tayo, lods?

🤩 lodi talaga kita ikaw na agad ninong ng mga anak ko!!

Ang Tanging Lodi Ko:

gague ka talaga

malabo nga talaga mata ni philomena.

my bestie:

alam kong kakakilala pa lang natin pero

i love u na agad 💗👉😔👈

Napangiti ako nang makitang nag-send siya ng picture n'ya ng naka-middle finger. He looked so done with me. Ang sungit talaga nito! Kaya mas bagay kami ni Philomena e. Baka sama lang ng loob ang ibigay n'ya sa mahal ko.

"Iscalade?" tawag ni Philo sa akin. Agad na bumalik ang tingin ko sa kan'ya, she was looking at me with her soft gaze. I could feel my heart racing.

Damn.

Siya lang talaga.

I feel like the entire strings of my heart is with her. She can manipulate my heart to be solely hers. And it is indeed hers only. Sa kan'ya lang talaga ako.

"Aalis na! Aalis na! Dalawa na lang!" the Barker yelled, napatingin ako sa signboard at nakitang dadaan ito sa pupuntahan namin ni Philo na eskinita. 

I held her hand as I guide her to the entrance of the jeep. Pilit kong binaba ang kan'yang suot na palda para hindi tangayin ng hangin.

Agad kaming sumakay ni Philomena dahil sakto namang dalawa kami, nauna s'ya at agad na umusog para sa akin. Philomena looked amused as she took a quick glance at me and I can't help but chuckle. Parati na lamang siyang mukhang natutuwa tuwing sumasakay kami sa jeep.

I told her I could use my car but she wanted to learn how to commute. Kaya naman ilang araw na kaming nagc-commute para naman matuto siya. Lahat nga 'yata ng pampasaherong sasakyan ay balak n'yang sakyan.

Sana all, pampasaherong sasakyan.

I nibbled on my lower lip, pinilig ang ulo at pakiramdam ko ay nagi-init ako. Baliw ka talaga, Iscalade. Kung anu-ano na lang iniisip mo. Madalas ay hindi pa maganda.

I held Philo's hand as she roamed around her sight towards the different buildings, cars and people we have passed by. Tila ba batang ngayon lang pinasyal sa isang lugar ay manghang-mangha siya. She is always like this. She tends to appreciate the little things. Hindi mawala ang maliit na ngiti sa aking labi.

"Ang laki po pala ng lungsod na ito..." she pursed her lips as we walked, our hands clasped together.

"Gusto mo ba talaga mag-State University? Pwede ka pa naman sa UJD, may mga scholar naman doon..."

My Mom even offered to pay for her tuition and living fees. Pero hiyang-hiya si Philomena at agad itong tinanggihan. She would rather work than accept any help from us. Pero hindi ko naman siya hinahayaan na maging mag-isa. Although, I love how she tries so hard to be independent — I want to pamper my love. I want to give her everything. My everything.

She lived in an apartment for the duration of her college life. Hindi rin kasi siya panatag na may mga ibang kasama, although she did join various organizations in her school. Mas nagkaroon siya ng kompiyansa sa kan'yang sarili. She would even invite me sometimes to join seminars and webinars for her organizations. Natutuwa ako na kahit papaano ay pinipilit n'yang makisalamuha sa iba.

"Hey..." saway ni Philo habang kinukuhanan ko s'ya ng litrato. "I looked exhausted po. Will you upload that? Nahihiya ako, Iscalade..."

Her frowned face made me pinched her on her cheeks. Agad naman n'yang hinawakan ang kan'yang pisngi. Lumamlam ang mga mata dala siguro ng pagod. 

"I won't post it..."

"Edi para saan po?"

I only glanced at her and pressed my lips on her forehead. Binaba ko ang camera ko sabay nito ang pagbaba ng maliliit kong halik patungo sa kan'yang labi.

"Secret," I uttered after taking a quick smack on her lips.

She only pouted at me and went back to her visual aids. Tahimik siya habang nagsusulat sa manila paper. Mahirap din pala ang ginagawa nila, halos sampung manila paper na 'yata ang sinusulatan n'ya bukod pa rito ang mga powerpoints na ginawa n'ya para sa mga klase n'ya. Partida, estudyante pa lamang siya nito.

I took pictures of her because I'm planning on writing a book. Alam ko parang wala sa katauhan ko dahil muntik pa nga 'yata akong bumagsak sa literature. I was more into science and mathematics, hindi bale mag-solve ako kaysa magsulat ng mga essays.

Bobo ako sa literature pero nagmahal ako ng HUMSS student. Ang lakas ko talaga.

I want Philomena Gracia to read my hidden thoughts of her. Kung paano sa simpling paglakad n'ya lang ay nagkakandarapa na agad ako. Sa ngiti n'ya pa lang ay pakiramdam ko biyaya na agad ang buhay. Even the way she adjusted her glasses, ang turn on talaga.

Tangina, Sarathiel dethroned.

Akala ko pa naman s'ya na ang pinakamalala sa aming magtotropa. Mukhang hahabol pa 'yata ako. Natalo ko pa nga 'yata.

"Ang laki n-na n'ya..."

I'm also using the pictures to update someone about Philo's achievements and her current life.

At first, I didn't want to because it will look like I invaded my love's privacy. Pero nang halos magmakaawa at muntik pa nga lumuhod ang ina n'ya sa akin. My heart constricted in affliction and pity. Albeit, being harsh to her daughter will never be right — I feel like she loved her in her own way.

She held the pictures on her arms. Patuloy na umaagos ang mga luha habang iniisa-isa ang mga litrato ni Philomena. I just watched her whimpered her thoughts and her love for her.

"K-kumakain ba siya nang tama?"

"Madalas po hindi kasi wala siyang pera." I sighed, exasperatedly. Binagsak ko pa ang aking mga balikat.

"Does s-she even have time to sleep?"

"Wala, Tita. Araw hanggang gabi siyang pudpod sa paga-aral, pangarap mo naman sa kan'ya 'yon 'di ba..."

Lalong lumakas ang hinagpis ng kan'yang nguyngoy. She even held on her chest and I immediately panicked. Baka siniseryoso n'ya ang sinasabi ko?

"Tita, joke lang. Di ko naman po pinapabayaan anak n'yo. Aircon pa nga po 'yon tuwing naga-aral s'ya tapos pinapaypayan ko pa, may kasama pa pong pineapple juice para di siya mauhaw. Nilalagyan ko rin po ng bimbo sa likod at pulbo para di talaga pagpawisan." I laughed awkwardly as I scratched my nape in embarrassment.

She glared at me and I almost shivered in fright, bigla naman akong napatda dahil parang nakita ko si Philomena na nagalit. Although Philo never really gets angry, ganito pala ang itsura n'ya kung sakali.

"H-hindi ko talaga alam bakit ikaw napili ng anak ko..." she cried louder. "P-pero thank you..."

"'Sensya na, Tita..." I forced a quick smile. She only sighed as she looked at me with gratitude.

"Pwede mo naman s'ya bisitahin, Tita..." I cooed, hinting that they can still fix their relationship.

I know there are relationships that are hard to fix. Wala rin ako sa posisyon para sabihin na magkapatawaran na sila. Pero sa loob ko ay umaasa ako na sana ay makita nilang hindi pa huli ang lahat. Yet at the same time, I cannot speak on behalf of those who are abused mentally, emotionally and physically in their so called homes.  

There's nothing wrong with cutting ties with your family members. It is indeed toxic to grow in an environment where you are molded into someone you do not want to be. Mahirap ang sabihin at ipilit na ayusin na lamang ang lahat.

Maybe if only parents would treat their children like human beings who don't only need to supply their basic needs but also their emotional needs. If only they would see that their children only need guidance and not shackles that becomes a hindrance for them to grow more — to learn more about life.

The toxic belief that all families are home should be abolished. Hindi lahat ng pamilya ay maituturing na tahanan. A home is somewhere you would want to go find comfort and love; it's not a place where you are belittled, disregarded and abused. 

"Iscalade..." she muttered softly. The way she acts right now reminds me of Philomena. "I'll be honest..."

Umangat ang tingin n'ya sa akin, puno ito ng dismaya at pagsisisi. Pinalis n'ya ang mga luha na hindi tumitigil sa pagpatak sa kan'yang pisngi.

"I d-don't think I deserve another chance..." she smiled, solemnly. "She's clearly happy that we're not in her life now. And I couldn't blame her."

"Philo still loves you po..."

"I know," she held her breath. Agad n'ya rin itong pinakawalan. She was sniffing because of her runny nose. "I m-made her that way. I wanted her to be the ideal version of myself, I only wanted the best for her. I didn't want her to end up like me. In a loveless marriage because I cannot leave my husband s-since it's my only validation. I wanted her to be more. H-hindi ko naman a-alam na sinasakal k-ko na pala siya..."

She cried harder while clasping her hand together. She was shaking, her posture made her look like she was vulnerable, bagsak ang mga balikat at namamaga rin ang kan'yang nga mata.

"I don't deserve her, Iscalade. How can I even beg for her forgiveness when I know that I don't deserve her at all?" she sobbed quietly this time.

Wala akong nagawa kundi malungkot para sa kan'ya. She's currently stressed out. Madalas silang mag-away ni Tito dahil hindi mapakali si Mrs. Valderama na wala si Philomena. Mr. Valderama on the other hand is busy with something else or someone else. Parang wala lang sa kan'ya na wala sa kanilang bahay si Philomena.

My jaw clenched at that thought. Nakakairita pero anong gagawin ko? Tatay 'yon ni Philo? Saan kaya nakuha ni Philomena ang ugali n'ya? She's different compare to her parents. It kinda contradicts the saying that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

"I think..." napalunok siya bago umangat ang tingin n'ya sa akin. "I should settle this once and for all."

She stood and once again looked at me, trying to force a smile. She looked worn out, pakiramdam ko ay ilang taon na agad ang tinanda n'ya. Agad siyang nagpakawala ng isang malalim na hininga.

"I'm filing for an annulment," she firmly stated, marahas na pinalis ang mga luha. "I thought having a complete family is everything, but a complete family doesn't mean a happy one. At ngayon na wala na si Philomena sa bahay na ito...I feel like everything's already in vain..."

Bukod sa annulment, she might find grounds for disbarment for Mr. Valderama. She told me it might be her redemption. Para sa pagpapabaya nito sa kanilang pamilya.

She took another glimpse on the pictures of Philomena at muli siyang umiyak. Paulit-ulit n'ya itong iniiyakan. I wonder if my Philo is also crying because she misses her family. The thought of it is already agonizing me, Philo doesn't deserve to cry. She's the least person that deserves sadness.

"Iscalade..." Tita smiled yet it showed a solemn expression. "Thank you sa paga-alaga kay P-Philomena, ha? S-sana di ka magsawa s-sa kan'ya...she deserves you, she deserves to be loved..."

Kita ko ang hinagpis sa kan'ya mga mata. She swallowed hard before finding her voice again.

"S-something I didn't do and something I'll forever regret. Thank you for loving her..."

Philomena Gracia told me the sweetest yes after a year of courting. Hindi n'ya alam na nagpaalam pa ako sa Mama n'ya kung pwede ba s'yang ligawan. Her Mom was hesitant at first but— wala naman s'yang choice e. Ako na kaya pinaka-best option para kay Philomena Gracia.

Sa ilang taon na magkasama kami, I learned more about her and I just kept on falling harder. Ang sabi nila nakakasawa raw kapag matagal na ang relasyon pero bakit sa kan'ya lalo lamang lumalalim ang pag-ibig ko? Parang di ko na kayang umahon at gusto ko na lang din malunod sa pagmamahal n'ya.

I'm glad Philomena Gracia took education as her college degree. She's genuinely happy with her course. She's glowing whenever she talks about her lessons. At masaya rin ako na hindi ko pinagsisisihan na civil engineering naman ang kinuha ko.

"What is this for, anyway?" Kuya Cal asked, inabot sa akin ang isang blueprint na matagal ko nang hinihingi sa kan'ya. My mouth immediately formed into  a wide grin.

"Library," maikli kong sagot at dahan-dahan binuklat ang blueprint na pina-design ko kay Kuya. I'm planning on a building a small cottage, meron namang lupa si Mom na hindi n'ya alam kung saan gagamitin. I told her if I could build something in that lot and she agreed without making any fuss.

"Di ka naman mahilig magbasa?" Kuya Cal furrowed his eyebrows, confusion written all over his face. "Are you even sure?"

"Para kay Philomena, Kuya..." I mumbled as I imagined her reading in that small cottage. Hindi ko mapigilan ang mapangiti.

I was multitasking! Nagsusulat ako ng libro habang nagaaral ng civil engineering at gumagawa ng mga plano namin sa buhay. Still, I never felt tired. Para kay Philomena Gracia e, hindi ako napapagod pagdating sa kan'ya.

Mabuti na lang at hindi ito sumabay sa pag-re-review ko sa board exam. Although I have the advantage since I came from a family of engineers and architects, I know it's difficult to pass the exam. Hindi naman pwedeng landi palagi ang inuuna ko.

I documented everything so that I could write something in our book. Writing is hard. Mas madali para sa akin ang mag-solve ng mga numbers, regardless if it's mathematics or science. Mas mahirap sa akin ang kumuha ng mga salita upang i-detalye ang mga bagay-bagay. Sinusubukan kong kuhanin ang tunay na kagandahan ni Philomena Gracia gamit ng mga salita kahit minsan ay kulang pa kung paano ipapaliwanag ang kagandahan n'ya sa pamamagitan ng mga letra...

I paused. Everything seems to be in blur right now. Despite the scalding sunlight, I feel like my whole vision can only see one person amidst the people around the vicinity. The leaves and petals from the decorations are swayed by the wind, making it looked like they were also anticipating her entrance. Nawala ang mga inaalala kong mga pangyayari sa buhay namin, all I can see right now is the woman I'm about to marry.

I thought I finally know everything about her.

Yet, seeing her in her puff sleeves A-line silk tulle gown with floriated appliqué, pakiramdam ko kulang pa ang buong buhay ko para makilala ko ang isang Philomena Gracia. She's a mystery waiting to be unraveled yet every time you think you finally figured her out, she becomes more mystic and enchanted.

My lips quivered at her beautiful sight. Paulit-ulit kong tinatag sa utak ko ang bawat salitang sasabihin ko ngayon. Pero para akong hinilahan ng dila. I become speechless whenever she's near, I feel like the right words are always hard to find whenever I talk to her. I swallowed hard. Kapag talaga tumakbo s'ya ngayon, hahabulin ko talaga s'ya. Hindi talaga ako papayag na hindi s'ya ang magiging asawa ko. Iiyak talaga ako sa harap ng Pastor at baka magmaktol pa. 

She was leisurely walking towards me, my Dad is the one who's leading her towards my direction. Lalo lamang bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko. Kita ko kung paano s'ya mahinang kinakausap ni Dad. She was concealing her quiet giggles as Dad kept on talking to her.

Kumunot naman ang noo ko. Pakiramdam ko lalo lang ako pinapakaba ni Dad. I could feel the jittery feeling in the pit of my stomach. Sana lang hindi n'ya ako pagtripan dahil pakiramdam ko talaga balak nila akong paiyakin.

I don't cry infront of others, maliban kay Philomena Gracia. I just don't feel like crying suits me. Sanay silang puro lang ako kalokohan. Kahit naman ako ay sanay rin sa gano'n, that's why I can't imagine myself crying.

My lips parted seeing a living fairy in Philomena Gracia. Her entire dress is making her look like she's floating or maybe she just makes me feel like I'm currently floating in the clouds.

When she's finally infront of me, she still looks like an utopian dream. Pakiramdam ko pinagbibigyan lang ako ng langit. She's too ideal, too kind and too beautiful. It's as if a goddess was bestowed to a mere mortal like me.

Her veil had flower linings in it, even her crown braided hair was decorated with flowers. She wanted a wedding in a garden near a church and so I obliged. I don't really mind what kind of wedding she wants, as long as I'm the groom.

The pastor offered us a small smile as he begins the wedding ceremony. My hands were trembling as the Pastor spoke about how marriage symbolizes the love that was gifted to us by Him, medyo kumalma lang ako nang patago itong hawakan ni Philomena. She offered me comfort even when I didn't ask for it. I glanced at her and she was already smiling at me, I can't help but notice the glistening tears on her eyes. 

Wala na, iiyak na talaga ako.

At tuwang-tuwa naman ang mga tropa ko dahil ang ilan sa kanila ay kumuha pa ng mga video.

"Huwag ka mahiya, Iscalade. Iiyak mo lang 'yan, dito lang kami." saad ni Sarathiel habang may hawak na DSLR at nakatutok pa 'yata sa akin. Agad naman akong dumaing. Hindi naman ako gan'yan sa kanila! Minsan...

When it's time for us to exchange our vows. Agad akong napalunok nang makitang s'ya ang una dapat na magbibigay ng kan'yang vows.

"Philo," I called for her and she attentively whispered back.

"Yes po?"

"Pwede bang ibulong mo na lang sa akin vows kasi..." I nervously laughed. "Baka isipin nila hindi ako nag-effort sa vows ko. Iba ka kasi magsulat..."

Her eyes broadened, she immediately laughed it off and still professed her love for me. Kinakabahan tuloy ako sa vows ko. May tiwala naman ako sa sarili ko pero pagdating kay Philomena Gracia ay nawawala ito.

I swallowed hard, forcing the lump down to my throat. Walang iiyak, Iscalade. Walang iiyak, kaya mo 'yan. Go, bro! Kaunting tiis na lang. I cheered myself in no valid. I let out a deep breath. I won't cry. Mamaya na lamang. Hindi sa harap nila. Lalo at mukhang handa pa ang mga kaibigan ko sa gilid.

Di ko talaga alam bakit sila ang mga kaibigan ko.

Pero unti-unti nang tumulo ang mga luha ko. I feel like crying is cliché — but with her? Cliché feels like being in a state of profundity. Sobrang lalim ng pagmamahal ni Philomena Gracia. I fell so hard that I cannot even climb anymore from the depths of her entire existence.

I mustered every remaining strength I have to clearly tell her my vows. She was only looking at me in my eyes, making me feel more nervous but at the same time I feel like with her — I'm never uncertain. I am always sure with Philomena Gracia.

She is indeed my love.

I lifted her veil and cupped her face, she gradually closed her eyes as she leaned in for anticipation. I claimed her lips to seal our promise to each other that life may have a rough path but with each other, we'll try to live with ease. My heart was thudding against my chest as I found myself wanting to feel more spellbound by her mouth, when she gave me more access I can't help but let my tongue travel inside it.

"Tama na 'yan, may bukas pa!"

"Iscalade, may honeymoon pa..."

"Hindi na nakakahinga si Philomena, Iscalade."

Agad akong napaigtad dahil sa hiyawan ng mga kaibigan ko. Philomena immediately blushed and looked at me, her cheeks flowing in crimson. Umiwas siya ng tingin sa akin, I can't help but laugh.

"Iodine, Lutetium, Vanadium, Uranium..." Philomena Gracia mumbled to my ears.

"Ngayon mo lang na gets?" I pursed my lips, teasing her.

"Uh huh, at saka..." she quietly tugged my tux to whisper once again. Her gentle breath makes me feel ticklish.

"Hindi ba dapat ako po ang kakalampag sa 'yo?"

I almost groaned. Her innocent question feels like it's lewd! Agad naman akong nag-init. Bakit ba kasi pakiramdam ko ang dumi-dumi kong tao kapag si Philomena ang kausap ko?

I kissed the top of Philomena's head to divert her thoughts. Altreano na s'ya. Tangina. Sabi ko sa sarili ko hindi ako iiyak pero ako 'yong pinili e. Ako 'yong pinakasalan. Ako 'yong mahal. Sino hindi iiyak no'n?

We arrived at the reception using a carriage. The entire venue were evidently inspired by fairytales. It was straight out of a storybook. The hanging chandelier lights, the smell of blossoming flowers and enchanting golden decors made Philomena gasped. Napatingin ako sa kan'ya, her eyes were gleaming in joy.

The wedding orchestra started playing the instrumental version of A Whole New World as we descended the grand staircase. She tightened her hold on my hand, ramdam ko ang kaba n'ya. Pinasadahan ko ng aking mga daliri ang kan'yang palad para kumalma s'ya. 

Napangiti naman ako.

I'll never let you go, Philomena Gracia. It's futile to even think about it. Without her, my existence doesn't even mean anything.

Noon, hindi ako naniniwala na hindi ako mabubuhay nang wala ang pag-ibig. Pero nang malaman ko na ang pangalan n'ya ay nangangahulugan sa salitang pag-ibig...

Indeed, I cannot live without love. I cannot live without my love. I cannot live without Philomena Gracia.

The ceremony were almost finished when I held her hand and lead her towards the balcony.

"Iscalade..." she called for me, sounding uncertain. "Anong meron?"

"Someone wants to talk to you..."

I opened the wide door for the balcony. It revealed her Mom who looked as nervous as Philomena Gracia.

"M-mommy..." Philomena Gracia immediately called. Her lips is quivering.

"Philomena..." her Mom smiled solemnly. Agad kong binitawan si Philomena. I encouraged her to talk to her Mom.

Pumasok s'ya sa loob at agad na kinamusta ang Mama niya. I only watched them from afar, hearing almost nothing because they're almost inaudible too.

I saw her Mom hesitating to hug Philomena, pero agad naman na yumakap ang anak n'ya sa kan'ya.

"I'm sorry..." her Mom muttered, her voice is trembling. "I'm so s-sorry, Philomena Gracia..."

Maybe, all Philomena Gracia wanted is that apology and she deserves that.

"I'm p-proud of you, a-anak." Her Mom sobbed. "I'm s-so proud of you..."

Philomena Gracia slowly broke down. She whimpered in her mother's arms. Kita ko kung paano natanggalan ng tinik sa puso ang mag-ina. All this time, all Philomena Gracia wanted was those words. All she ever wanted was her parents to be proud of her.

And she claimed it.

She even claimed more achievements.

She pursued everything all on her own. She didn't anyone to gain her freedom.

My heart swelled in extreme bliss. I will spend my entire life with an amazing woman. I will never regret a thing. She is worth it and will always be worth it.

When we were kids, we thought freedom is when our parents would allow us to play until night time and there are no rules that we should follow. But as we grew older, we realized that freedom is more profound. That the freedom we have right now is due to the sacrifices that were made by the heroes of our past.

Gumuhit ang isang ngiti sa aking labi.

Sacrifices are made in order to gain the freedom we have right now. And after all the sacrifices that Philomena Gracia endure, I cannot wait to spend my entire freedom with her. Freedom isn't easy to attain because sometimes we don't really want to be freed and it isn't easy to shake off the chains set by others.

Yet, I believe that we have our entire life to keep unquestioning the belief that we are sovereign beings and we own our freedom to ourselves. That's why despite the constant hindrances, I know that both of us will continue on pursuing our freedom, together, forever. 

❛ ━━━━━━･❪ Philomena Gracia Valderama Altreano ❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜

Thank you! I still have my last note for this story, but the whole story is now completed! Thank you for staying with me 'till the end. Iodine, Lutetium, Vanadium, Uranium! wait for the 💌 ♡
All of my love,
Li