Hanging out with all of his friends right before school starts is not exactly what he needed when he was full of anxiety.

Sero and Mina had come back to the dorms on Sunday and school started the next day. Kaminari was on edge, and even though the anxiety didn't make his stomach absolutely hurt, his heart still beat a little too fast.

They're all joking and playing video games, and Kaminari joins in on the fun, but it doesn't stop the anxiety.

He glances at Shinso for some sort of help, and the teen actually catches on instantly.

Kaminari knows Bakugo catches on too because before either he or Shinso can say anything, Bakugo is standing up and telling them to calm the fuck down and get to bed already because they had school the next day.

Sero whines dramatically as be flops onto Kirishima's lap. "I don't wanna."

The mention of school out loud has Kaminari standing up abruptly to calm himself down.

"I'm gonna go. Gotta start early," he says and the others frown.

"Stay," Mina whines, "we haven't seen you in forever."

Kaminari laughs. "You'll have enough of me at school tomorrow. Now let me sleep," he says and makes his way to the door with Bakugo following.

Shinso gets up quickly, too, and says goodbye to them quickly as he catches up to Kaminari.

They hadn't told their friends they were official, but they would soon. Just after they get settled into the routine of school once again and everything calms down.

Kaminari doesn't know if Bakugo knows or not.

In the elevator, Bakugo huffs in annoyance.

"If you start freaking the fuck out, tell us you're overwhelmed or just fucking leave. You don't have to stick around while feeling shitty just cause you don't wanna hurt their feelings or some shit. It's not good for you, dumbass," Bakugo scolds Kaminari.

Since Bakugo's floor is right under Sero's, he gets off first and flips them off as he walks away before the elevator doors close and takes them to the floor right below which is Kaminari's.

"He's right," Shinso says in the elevator.

Kaminari sighs, already knowing, but feeling all mixed up about it. He knows it's not good for him to stay there when he's uncomfortable. The problem is that if he just leaves his friends, he'll start feeling either guilty or left out because of it.

It's overwhelming having shitty mental health.

That's an understatement.

"You can't keep doing that to yourself."

Kaminari grabs Shinso's hand and shakes it aggressively. "Agghhhh," he groans out loud.

Shinso just watches in amusement before the doors open and they exit.

"Weirdo," Shinso says.

Kaminari doesn't say anything until they're in his room.

He turns to his boyfriend and grips the back of his shirt, hugging him. "Hug me back," he demands.

Once Shinso fulfills his demand, Kaminari relaxes and feels his muscles start hurting.

"I know it's not good for me to stay somewhere even though I'm..." he trails off, thinking of a word to use, "overwhelmed."

Shinso rests his head on top of the blond's.

"I just worry. I know they'll understand, but I'll feel bad anyway. And then sometimes I feel left out. All because of my stupid ass shitty brain."

"I'm sorry, Kami. I know this is hard for you. Everything you do doesn't go unnoticed, okay? We see you trying."

Kaminari pulls back to look at him, and although the eye contact sometimes makes him uncomfortable, he likes this. Being able to be intimate with his boyfriend. Being able to have a boyfriend.

Letting someone be this close to him. It's a lot, but he's doing this.

That means he is getting better, right?

"You do a lot, too. Especially for me. This is so cheesy and gross and I never thought this would be possible."

Kaminari smiles up at his boyfriend and the other teen has to stop himself from kissing his boyfriend stupid because how did he get so lucky?

~~~~~

Even with his insomnia pills, he had a hard time falling asleep.

He slept with his favorite blanket in his favorite sweats with his boyfriend and cat.

A nice shower was taken, too, but there he laid for over an hour, trying to fall asleep before the medication kicked in and knocked him out.

The anxiety in his chest and stomach was so much, but at least it didn't make his stomach hurt.

In the morning, when his alarm rang, he almost started crying.

School.

Shinso woke up, and poked Kaminari's cheek to wake him up, but he was already awake. He was dreading this.

"I'm awake," Kaminari says, eyes wide open. He was wide awake now with anxiety bubbling in his chest.

He needs to take his medication already.

"I need my medications," he states, already on the verge of tears.

He clears his throat, sitting up. Smushy meows quietly before laying back down.

"Hey, it's our first day. Remember, it's the same stuff as always. Get to class, Aizawa starts everything off, then we go on about our day. We've done this before," Shinso says, sitting up and looking over at Kaminari's tense form.

"I- I know that. I just can't make myself calm down. I'm going to shower. Maybe that'll help calm me down."

They'd decided not to go running today since it was the first day of second year.

"Okay, I'm going to my room to change. I'll be right back," Shinso says, waiting for Kaminari to look at him before leaving.

When the blond does, Shinso smiles at him and nods reassuringly.

"You got this, okay? Breathe."

Kaminari takes a deep breath, nodding.

"Okay, okay," the blond says.

As soon as Kaminari is in the restroom with his stuff, Shinso leaves to change and get his bag.

The silence in the restroom makes him nervous, so he turns on the shower as he brushes his teeth and uses the restroom. He looks at himself in the mirror and bites the inside of his cheek.

He hasn't had any bad flashbacks. He has them every day, but he's been able to just get over them or snap himself out.

The anxiety of school brings those memories back up because it reminds him of when he had to hide his trauma while struggling with the anxiety he had because of school.

It just reminds him of that time.

A time that was not even that long ago.

He shakes his head and takes deep breaths. He takes his anti-depressant and continues with his breathing. He just has to get ready so he can take his anxiety pill.

And then hopefully it'll help him calm down.

A few more breaths and he's undressing and getting in the shower.

The water is nice and warm but even that doesn't have him calming down and that frustrates him even more. He has to catch his breath and hold back sobs as tears fall.

It's just school.

Like every other year.

He doesn't know why it gives him so much anxiety.

Maybe he can go to Arai quickly before class?

If she's there he'll go.

After calming himself down, he showers slowly to keep himself calm and then gets out when he's done.

Once he's changed and has his hair done, he exits his restroom to see Shinso lying down on his bed, scrolling on his phone while petting Smushy.

He guesses his eyes are still somewhat red because when Shinso makes eye contact, his smile falls and he frowns.

Shinso stands up and goes over to him, putting his hands on his cheeks, squishing them together to press a kiss on his lips.

"I know you don't want to go," he whispers softly, and when Kaminari blinks, tears fall silently.

"Remember what I said. You've done this before. You can do this," he says before pressing a kiss on his forehead.

Kaminari nods and sniffles. "I'm-" his voice sounds broken and pathetic and he hates it, so he clears his throat and continues, "I'm just overwhelmed."

"I wanna go see Arai before class, soets eat fast," Kaminari says, pulling away from Shinso and grabbing one of his anti-anxiety pills to take with breakfast.

Shinso nods encouragingly.

"That sounds good. Let's go."

And with that they head downstairs.

~~~~~

After making sure Arai was in her office at the school, he sat down with Shinso in the kitchen island.

With his glass of orange juice he looks around and makes sure there's no one around when he quickly and discretely puts the pill in his mouth and gulps it down.

Shinso smiles at him and takes a bite of his toast.

They made rice and fish. Something light and simple for their first day.

Kaminari also didn't want to risk making his stomach hurt.

He also knows that he should just come out and tell his class about the pills. He doesn't have to, but they're his classmates.

Before he can chicken out, he texts Aizawa his plan to tell the class during homeroom.

He takes a deep breath and tells Shinso his plan, too. When the other teen nods, Kaminari smiles and let's out a nervous breath, forcing himself to eat the rest of his food. It wasn't even a lot to being with and it wasn't like he wasn't hungry. He was hungry, he was just nervous.

They both finish and wash their used dishes quickly so that Kaminari has enough time to talk to Arai.

Once they've made sure they had their bags, they take off. Kaminari found it weird that he hadn't seen any of his friends. Just his classmates like Koda and Tokoyami who looked too dead to make conversation.

Kaminari was practically vibrating with how nervous he was, shaking.

It's honestly embarrassing for him. He feels embarrassed at all this because he really has done this for over ten years. School is just something that starts back up after a few months of vacation. He should be used to it.

And he's done this without professional help before.

The thing is, now he does have professional help. Along with just regular help. Before it was just his mom telling him to stop being a cry baby.

To stop freaking out or they'll have to take him to the hospital where he'd be taken away from her.

It didn't hit him how bad that was until a little while back.

Once they're outside her office, they knock.

A muffled 'come in' is heard, and they enter. It's a small waiting room, and then another room inside for where they have their sessions. The room is sound-proofed, so their conversations cannot be heard from the outside.

"Good morning Kaminari and Shinso," she nods and smiles.

They both say it back before Shinso sits down on the couch in the waiting area. It's not a big room, just enough to fit two chairs comfortably with space left over.

Shinso motions for Kaminari to give him his bag, and the blond hands it over with a nervous smile. "Thank you."

Shinso just smiles.

With that, Kaminari goes into the room with Arai and closes the door behind him as Shinso takes out his phone to use in the meantime.

Kaminari and Arai sit down. Arai behind her desk, and Kaminari on one of the beanbags, grabbing a stuffed animal to put on his lap to distract himself from the anxiety he feels.

"So, what is this spontaneous meeting about?" Arai asks.

Kaminari takes a deep breath, calming himself down so he doesn't start crying.

"I'm just really nervous about school. I don't know why it's just a lot for some reason right now," he says, shaking his head.

Arai nods.

"Is it particularly bad this year?"

Kaminari nods.

It really is. In past years, it was bad enough to where he would have anxiety attacks and stomach pains, but not this bad. This year it was amplified.

"I used to have stomach issues and attacks before, but, I don't know, it was kinda more extreme this time. Could it be cause of my dad and stuff?"

Arai nods a bit. "It could be, yes. The stress with all of that already and then this new stress that you get constantly could have made it more extreme, even with the medication."

Kaminari nods, waiting for more.

"With everything that happened with your dad and mom, the stress that was added could have been really bad if it wasn't for your medication. Did you take it today?"

Once she gets a nod, she continues.

"Do something that takes up time. Learning to skateboard could help. Doing something for you, setting up schedule and lists, and even opening up time for self care could benefit you. Like wake up thirty minutes earlier so that you have time to maybe ride a bike, take more time on skincare, or maybe even just playing a video game. Something for you. Do it alone or with someone. It doesn't matter. Maybe that will help," she offers.

He nods and as time runs out, she offers more advice along with letting him talk about his anxieties.

It helps to say it out loud, even when he doesn't know why he's anxious. Just making it known helps.

"I also wanted to tell my class about my pills. Probably about my therapy, too. You said I should be more open about my stuff. I know I don't have to, but I feel like I can't hide this forever. Not from them. They're my classmates."

Arai nods. "I think that's a great idea."

Just then, the bell rings, making both of them jump.

After an embarrassed smile from Kaminari and a laugh from Arai, they both get up, and Kaminari makes his way out of the room where Shinso is, still on his phone.

He had looked up when he heard the door open, so he stood up, pocketing his phone and holding out Kaminari's bag for him to grab.

"Thank you," he tells Shinso again.

"No problem."

Once they say goodbye, they make their way to the classroom, not surprised when they see Iida, Bakugo, and Momo already in there along with Aizawa.

The man is surprisingly not in his yellow cocoon, though.

The couple goes over to Bakugo's desk where the angry blond is on his phone. He grumbles when he feels their presence and clicks his phone off.

"What do you want?" He asks, frowning.

"Aww, were you texting lover boy?" Shinso asks, and Kaminari laughs, shoving Bakugo's shoulder a bit.

Baku go turns red and glares at the two.

"Who's lover boy?"

Of course.

"Fuck off Half'n'Half," the angry blond yells.

Kaminari laughs.

"Wait, you were texting me. Am I lover boy?" Todoroki adds, and Bakugo gets redder as Kaminari's laughs turn into wheezes.

Shinso starts laughing, too.

"Keep your damn mouth shut," Bakugo yells and it sounds desperate.

Todoroki stands there awkwardly at the whole thing, tiny blush forming on his face. It would have been unnoticeable if they weren't looking for it.

Walking away, Todoroki whispers to himself, "Oh my god. I am lover boy."

Kaminari has to fight to calm himself down because no way that just happened.

"Kaminari!"

Said blond jumps at the loudness of Iida's voice.

"I was made aware by Mr. Aizawa that you would be announcing something important," he says, hands chopping through the air.

Kaminari clears his throat, nodding. "That's right," he says, now nervous again.

Bakugo is still turned away in embarrassment, but Shinso shoves Kaminari lightly with his shoulder and the blond smiles.

"Good luck!" Iida yells before making his way back to his desk where he sits, facing forward.

Soon, the whole class is filled up, everyone seated as the late bell rings.

Mr. Aizawa is at the front of the class, half dead. "Welcome back, second years. Many students will say that second year is the hardest year in high school. That's false. First year was the hardest. Now you're used to what's expected of you and can push yourselves to become better heroes."

"You know what coming, and hopefully there are no more villain attacks because if there are any, well, you won't see that coming. We will be doing more work studies, so be ready for that. Of course, we will still have after school lessons and stuff like that. If you need something, just ask. That goes for everyone for anything. Just as long as it's reasonable, guys."

"Hero training will be every day we have class now, unless I say otherwise. That means lesson days will be split into a and b days. Class will be from eight to twelve then you will have lunch for an hour before training which will be from one to four."

"On A days, you'll have psychology, Math, and English. B days will be chemistry, japanese literature, and history. On both days, you'll have home room where, like usual, I explain current events and information that's important for you to learn. Now, before I go on, Kaminari is going to make an announcement, so stay quiet."

The room does, in fact, stay quiet as Kaminari gets up and walks in the awkwardly quiet room up to where Mr. Aizawa was once standing.

He swallows thickly before smiling and laughing in embarrassment.

"Hi, so long time no see, guys," he says and pauses before taking a deep breath that sounds way too loud in the quiet room, "Okay. So I do therapy now, woo," he cheers, "and my therapist was saying to be more opened or whatever. So, just so you know, I take medication."

He smiles.

"Multiple, so if you see me popping a pill at breakfast, don't think I'm a druggie or anything. They're prescribed. That's all."

He laughs at the end with how horribly quiet the room is and sits down, feeling his classmates' eyes on him.

As Mr. Aizawa steps back up to continue the class, Kaminari can already feel himself calming down. At least for the day.

Hopefully tomorrow he doesn't wake up anxious again.

***
Word Count: 3,028
yall so i went on a trip with my friend for five days and I just got back home today at around four. I had barely written anything😭😭😭 it was a fun trip, but I live in the South where it's mostly Hispanics. So many white people were in this place we were at and their accents were just so funny 😭😭 oh my god. The only thing that I didn't like about the trip is that there were so many roaches and I don't do roaches. I can deal with so many other bugs even though I hate them, but roaches are the one thing that I just can't stand. I hate them. The place was beautiful, though. Anyway I hope yall liked this chapter. The next one will go up next Sunday at 8pm central time. I love you all and tysm for reading<3