Suicide is an extremely touchy subject and I really don't want to offend anybody BUT IF I DO, please know that 98% of what I will say is going to be fact; the other two will be opinion AND YOU DO NOT HAVE TO AGREE WITH ME.

If this subject is triggering to you, please refrain from reading.

Suicide is something that the majority, if not all, of us have heard of. Some of us may have had the misfortune of knowing someone who has committed suicide. Either way, it is a serious topic that SHOULD BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY.

Note: I have known plenty of people who say they want to kill themselves for attention. Don't do this. Please don't do this. It causes the people around you to stress out and it takes a toll on their emotional health as well. If you do feel suicidal, the first thing you should do is talk to someone about how you're feeling and work towards getting help.

Another note: If you're going to write about suicide, please write a disclaimer at the beginning of the chapter so that your readers who may be triggered by it know that you wrote about it.

Some facts (and myths) about suicide:

FACT: Suicide is associated with severe depression. However, this doesn't mean that all people with depression are suicidal, and it doesn't mean that people who do not suffer from depression will not suffer from depression. 40-80% of people feel suicidal at least once in their lifetimes.

FACT: Children of parents who attempt suicide are at a greater risk of committing suicide. Part of it has to do with genetics (ex. inheriting mental illnesses), but it also has to do with the emotion that goes along with seeing someone go through that period of darkness.

FACT: Men are more likely to actually commit suicide. Women, however, are more likely to attempt.

MYTH: People who talk about suicide aren't likely to actually commit. People who talk about suicide want help, but it doesn't mean they won't do it. They may say things like, "If something happens to me, I want you to..." or "Life isn't worth living..." etc. 

MYTH: Suicide takes place with little or no warning. Nobody just decides that they want to kill themselves. It takes place over a long span of time, and most, if not all, people will provide behavioural clues, such as giving away valued possessions, isolating themselves from family and friends, and losing interest in their favourite activities.

MYTH: Suicidal people are fully intent on committing. Surprisingly, only 3-5% of people who are suicidal actually want to commit. Most people are just unsure of where they are in life, or can not see their problems objectively enough to realize they have alternatives. Most suicidal people will "set up" attempts so that they won't die, but will feel like they're going to. Moreover, once the crisis passes, they are generally happy to be alive.

MYTH: Suicidal people will always remain suicidal. Suicidal thoughts usually only stick around for a limited period of time.

Note: I'm a good example of why this is a myth because I'm still alive (yay!)

MYTH: People who recover from depression are less likely to commit suicide. This is actually wrong- people who recover from depression are actually at a greater risk of feeling suicidal because they actually have the energy and motivation to do so. This is why it is important to seek help and take care of yourself- you are the most important person in the world, and you have to make sure that you, before anybody else, are okay.

MYTH: Talking to someone that's suicidal ABOUT suicide will push them over the edge. Actually, because society shames people for feeling depressed/suicidal, talking to them about it will give them the "permission" to talk. Not talking to them can lead to further isolation.

How can you tell if someone is suicidal?

Most of the time you can't. That's what makes it so scary is that you could bump into literally anyone and not be able to tell! However, if you do believe that someone is contemplating suicide, here are some things to be wary of:

1) Stay with the person if there is any immediate danger.

2) Encourage them to talk about it and let it out- don't withdraw them.

3) Show the person that you care, but don't promise them that "everything will be okay". Your definition of "okay" may not be the same as theirs.

4) Take it seriously. If you tell someone that it's all in their head, that it's selfish, or that they'll get over it, it usually makes them more likely to attempt it.

5) Seek counselling. Most cities have suicide prevention centers and 24-hour toll-free hotlines that will be able to assist you.

6) Don't promise to keep it a secret. Suicide is not something that people should keep to themselves. To save lives, suicide has to be talked about.

7) Be respectful. Just because something doesn't seem rational to you, it ultimately makes sense to them. Choose your words wisely and be supportive of their well being.

SUICIDE IS 100% PREVENTABLE.

Personal note: I empathize deeply with this topic because I used to be suicidal too. I was in eighth grade and I was going through a really hard time with bullies. People would pick on me because I looked odd, because I liked to sing but wasn't a very good singer (still not that good, but that's a different story), and because of other reasons which I'm still not sure of to this day. It got so bad that I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to tell my parents because I didn't want them to worry about me, and I had no one to confide in because I thought that if I went to the school counselor, they'd laugh at me.

Eventually, one of my friends told a teacher, who told a school counselor on her behalf. They called my parents and told me what was going on, and I realized then that they were so, so worried about my safety and well being. I went to the hospital and talked to a bunch of people who were really supportive of getting me back on my feet. It was a lengthy process, but it's safe to say that I don't feel like that anymore. 

I'm really happy with my life, and I've used that experience as a way to reach out to people and advocate and educate. Furthermore, the people that bullied me have no place in my life- actually, until right now, I haven't thought about them for a good three years. 

Things get worse before they get better, but I can assure you that things always get better.

A few words:

A) I've said this a lot of times, but DO NOT romanticize suicide. There is absolutely nothing romantic about somebody wanting to kill themselves. Don't do it for attention because it takes away the seriousness of acquiring help for the people who actually do feel suicidal.

B) Again with language, DO NOT tell someone to kill themselves. I can't tell you how many times I've heard that line being said AS A JOKE. It's not a joke. Someone's life is not a joke. It's not even funny and I get so PISSED OFF WHEN PEOPLE SAY THINGS LIKE THAT. DO YOU ACTUALLY WANT SOMEONE TO KILL THEMSELVES BECAUSE OF SOMETHING YOU SAID? WHY WOULD YOU EVER SHAME SOMEONE LIKE THAT??? God, it makes me so mad, I'm really mad now.

C) Don't add to the stigma revolving around suicide. Suicide isn't a "poor you, boo-hoo" story on the news; someone's son or daughter, mother or father, aunt or uncle, friend or spouse, etc. isn't coming back to them. Don't let the opinions of other people convince you that it'll never happen to people you know, or that it's not something that should matter if it doesn't directly pertain to yourself. 

D) Always, ALWAYS look for help. I've said this a countless number of times before, and I'll say it over and over again: get help. Help is always available. People are there to help you. No matter how apathetic you think the world is, there is always someone out there is cares. 

My own two cents about suicide:

This is ONLY AN OPINION.

I believe that suicide is not selfish, and I will tell you why:

If suicide is selfish, then the person who is calling them selfish is ALSO selfish for wanting to keep them in a world where people aren't willing to listen to them, or talk to them about their problems, or make an effort to understand why they're suicidal in the first place.

However, I do believe that suicide is counter-productive, and I will also tell you why:

If you want to commit suicide because someone hurting you, you let the other person win. People only care once you're gone, and that doesn't lead to anything. I can tell you numerous stories about people who have killed themselves in my community that have been forgotten because no one took a stand to prevent it from happening in the first place. I believe that there are always alternatives to problems, no matter how hopeless and helpless you feel. 

If you are able to use your experiences to help people, then why don't you? Why not take your negative experiences and turn them around so that people who experience similar problems can get help too? I think the best person to help someone who is suicidal is someone who has been suicidal before, but overcame their feelings. At least they understand what it feels like and have first-hand experience.

I think that we are all part of each others' lives. Saving one person may not seem like a lot to you, but it is definitely an amazing feeling to have done so, even if it's your own life you saved.

I didn't want to chalk this up with facts because we already get enough of the sad news. I just thought I'd debunk some myths and offer support. Unfortunately I don't have the authority to tell anybody how to cope with suicide because I'm not a certified doctor/psychologist/anything (I'm 17 for crying out loud), but I implore anybody who is suicidal to always seek help. You're not alone, and you are important. Remember that.

Here is a link to suicide prevention hotlines around the world:

http://bohemianspirit.tumblr.com/post/73555796189/argentina-suicide-hotlines-armenia-suicide

(it's available as an external link at the side of the screen on the web version of Wattpad)

Sources:

Huffman, K. (2010). Psychology in Action 9th ed. Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons.