16 | perfection

(n) the state or quality of being perfect

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                    This playish green-haired psychopath before me, radiating with nothing but power and insanity, had me enthralled. He was mesmerizing in every way. The faint glimmer of the afternoon sun ghosted over his pale skin and eyes as deep as the heart of the sea.

It has been a month and a half and I have finally accepted the fact that I do like him.

I like him.

Liking him was never my plan or intention. And, if somebody had told me that, the first day I met the infamous Joker, I would have picked them as my patient and tried to cure them. But, if it was my plan, I like him more than I originally planned to do.

I have had many restless and sleepless nights where I just stay up all night, thinking of the sessions with him, reading his letters, smiling at his presents, having weird dreams about him and wake up to miss him all over again.

I try to forget about him but he is all I think about.

At night, I cant sleep and in the morning, I cant wake up.

And, some days I wake up feeling convinced that I don't have feelings for him anymore, but when I enter his cell, and meet his enchanting waves of blue eyes, it all comes back like a slap.

A hard painful slap that leaves a red mark on my cheek.

I know what I have for him is more than just like but I will stick with it for now, because I dont want to think about the other strong and powerful L-word.

I watch as he moves his hands in the air, the muscles of his pale skin, flexing as he does, his blue eyes filled with wonder and delight as he explains one of his adventurous nights with Batman, his red-lipsticked mouth moving wildly and his electric green hair flying up, and becoming a hot mess as he bounces in his seat. His laughter echoes around the room, an evil cackle of his crooked little mind that I admire.

"... Harley?"

The name of mine rolling down his tongue stopped me from my thoughts and I woke up to face reality. Blinking rapidly, I said, "Yes, Mr. J?"

His eyes narrowed at me as his leant forward, giving me a wide grin, his grin was evil, like he knew something about me.

"Tell me ... about your childhood." He said in his deep throaty voice, an erotic tone underlying it.

"My childhood?" I asked, my voice sounding higher than usual and I coughed a little, feeling flustered.

"Um ..." I paused.

I had a pretty crappy childhood and I was scared of what he would think of me after I tell him about it. Will he think less of me? Will he look at me in disgust? Will he think I am weak? What if he doesnt find me interesting anymore?

A million thoughts circled my mind and I squeezed my eyes shut before giving out a sigh.

"Don't you trust me Harley?" He asked, his head tilting to one side as he studied me with his icy blue eyes.

"I do trust you. I am just afraid that after I tell you, you will get annoyed." I said and stared into his eyes, trying to read his emotions.

He laughed, flipping his head back, his mouth wide open. Then, his lowered down and he looked at me, giving me a cold intense glare.

"Nothing makes me annoyed, Harley, especially not you, you make me laugh." He said, giving me another one of those grins.

I smiled at what he said.

He gestured for me to continue and I pursed my lips.

"Um..." I started. "I had a pretty crappy childhood. Apparently, I was the product of a one night stand, which I found later in my life, and I was thrown into the orphanage when I was a newborn, living and growing there was tough, the people treated me badly and I started school and it was a strict school, my grades were high and I was always the loner until Debby entered my life. She is a good friend of mine, she is also an orphan." I paused to look at him, he was curiously looking at me, his eyes filled with genuine interest and it made me continue.

"I met my parents one day, they didnt know me but I knew them, they were walking with a small boy, who liked like five, apparently, after they threw me away, they must have gotten back together and made a baby boy." I said and laughed a little at the end, feeling sad all of a sudden.

I frowned and looked upto see his eyes and he was not grinning anymore, instead he was breathing heavily and he looked angry.

Did I say something wrong?

"Is something wrong, Mr.J?" I asked and he leaned forward, looking at me with intense eyes.

"We both had a sorrowful start in life, sweetheart and its our choice how we live our life after that, do you want to live in a bland and boring life or in a life that your heart truly desires?" He asked, still not grinning.

I tried to ignore the butterflies erupting in my stomach when he called me sweetheart and focused my attention on the question.

"I want to live a life my heart truly desires." I said, without hesitation.

"What do you desire?"

You.

In that moment, as I stared into his deep cerulean haunting eyes, I realised that I'm so totally, completely, eye-popping seriously, ground-breaking passionately, deliciously, in lov--

No.

I stopped my thoughts.

"Mm?"

He asked and it woke me uo from my trance and I did not know what to reply.

"I desire a life where no rules apply, a life where I laugh each and every second, where everyday I wake up, feeling excited and happy, I want people to be jealous of my life, not the other way round, I want to feel free, I never ever want to feel like I'm not good enough, I want to have a purpose in life, I want to feel perfect," I paused, tears brimming my eyes and I breathed hard from the intensity of my speech. "I want a life where the rollercoaster I ride always goes up."

All the while, I was staring into his eyes and his face was just emotionless, he didnt say a word or move a muscle but he kept staring at me. His whole body was leaned forward and I realised that I had leaned forward a little too.

"Closer." He breathed out, gesturing for me lean closer and I did.

We were inches away and I could feel his eyes staring at my lips and up close, my heart pounded in my chest, and I could feel his breath on my lips. It sent shivers down my spine.

"You are my kind of perfect." He breathed out and his eyes looked up to see my eyes. His eyes were intense and filled with an unreadable emotion. "Let me be the reason ... for you to have that life." He said and he inched closer, our foreheads touching, and before I could even register that sentence in my head,

Our lips brushed.

The bell rang.

I pulled away from him at the speed of light.

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Hiya!

*hides behind deadshot* I know you guys hate me for not making them kiss... again.

They will get their kiss, don't worry. I just want to build the desire and tension between them. So, that when they finally kiss, fireworks fly. 🎉🎊

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