Chapter Twenty

This morning, I had woken to the thundering sound of banging on my door. Once it was assured I was fully awake, a herd of guards instructed me to dress decently and informed me that I would be led to Kendall's office when I was ready. It was either that or I would be "kindly" directed.

I had taken my time getting dressed, choosing a large shirt and a pair of sweats to wear, figuring I would have to shift and perform my Protector duties sometime during the day. I wasn't particularly looking forward to seeing Kendall because we hadn't talked since his brother had brought us back to the palace.

The ball had continued without us, Lex assuring everyone we would return soon. It ended, none of them having a clue we hadn't showed up yet. Once we'd returned, Kendall had been placed into and out of meetings or had some type of business to attend to. I had seen him once, long enough for us to both make eye contact, but someone had grabbed his attention shortly after.

Believe me, I'd tried returning things to normal. I'd shifted the morning after and walked towards his room only to have a guard tell me I wouldn't be needed until I was told so. That resulted in my lounging around, waiting. It got to the point where Lex snapped at me in a crowded room because I had continually "pestered" him.

After I decided it was about time to leave, I swung the door open, meeting the impatient face of a guard. He was only inches away as if he was going to knock on the door yet again.

"Was it necessary to take so long? The Prince expected us a minute ago," he grunted, trying not to add too much bite into his words. He wouldn't want the Protector telling her precious Master that he'd insulted her. I couldn't imagine that ending too well for the guard in any scenario.

"Don't get all screwy on me just yet. I'll take the blame, although you're at fault for not telling me we're on a timed schedule," I replied, watching with a Cheshire grin as the guard grew flustered and looked down at his feet.

"Well? Lead the way. The Prince expected us a minute ago," I mimicked, his expression worth the teasing. He began barking orders at the others and we were on our way shortly after.

Ordering the guards around was one of the few perks of being a Protector. I was placed higher in ranking than everyone except Kendall himself. But I didn't take advantage of it, save with the guards. I even helped a few servants on occasion. But the guards gave me the worst remarks and looks, so it only seemed fit to return the favor.

The guards halted in front of the grand office doors. The one who had led us here looked pale and hesitated in opening the doors. I sighed, pushing back my hair which had traveled closer to my face during our walk, before standing next to him.

"Oh for heaven's sake, I'll open them," I snapped impatiently, grabbing the twin doorknobs and pulling. I knew it was custom for a guard to open the door, but I couldn't bring myself to care.

Kendall was standing by his desk, turned away from us while on a phone. At the groaning sound created by the doors, he whirled around, irritation evident from his ongoing conversation. When he realized it was me, he sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"We will finish this later. I have other matters to deal with than your unnecessarily stubborn behavior," Kendall said calmly, hanging up without waiting for a response.

"I would ask for an explanation as to why you were not on time, but I will safely assume you are at fault," he said, making his way over to his desk. It was then that I noticed the bags under his eyes.

I huffed, crossing my arms against my chest as a guard closed the doors. "Maybe if you actually slept, you wouldn't be so snappy," I replied, getting satisfaction out of the narrowing of his eyes.

"Had you not ran out during your own event, I would have no reason for being snappy," he said, revealing his annoyance. He was still angry over my leaving during the ball.

"I thought we were through with this. I told you-"

"Enough!" Kendall yelled, his hand slamming on his desk, the sound echoing throughout the room. He was standing up, the light atmosphere gone as thick tension swirled and sliced through the room.

"That night should not have happened. I should not have been embarrassed by some servant, not seen my brother that I had no intention of visiting. Had you obeyed me like you were supposed to do, all would be fine," he said, walking closer to me. I did the last thing expected: I laughed.

I should have been angry over the accusation, but I couldn't find any to direct towards him. Kendall was only further proving that he was an arrogant ass, something I was adapting around.

"It's a damn dinner with your family! What are they going to do, lock you in the basement and strangle you with their affection?" I asked, a grin on my face.

I watched as he relaxed a little, but there was still a frown on his face. "I have my reasons for staying away as you have your reasons for running," Kendall replied, not giving me the details I'd hoped for.

"You're being childish-"

"I left because I was never considered part of the family, not the family I have to visit," he started, some of his anger returning. There was now a humorless smile on his face, and his eyes were distracted.

"They still call me the odd one. I did not tell you the full story in the forest, and I do not intend to today. They are only interested in reuniting with me because I am finally acting as a true Gordon should. I have land, much more than my brothers; wit that I use to my every advantage; and respect from those even higher than I.

However, when I was not so well off, they hardly acknowledged me. After many years of that, I cut them off. I would have changed my name, but as my brother said, being a Gordon works in my favor. It was one of the many reasons I was able to climb the ranking with such swiftness. I owe my family nothing," Kendall finished, a faraway look in his eyes.

I sympathized with Kendall; I really did. But he was making something out to be larger than it actually was. It was a simple dinner that would last less than a day. It wasn't something worth getting worked up over.

"It's a dinner, Kendall, nothing more," I said softly, trying to ease the blow.

"Do you remember when you returned home?" He asked so suddenly that I blinked in surprise but nodded cautiously.

"Do you remember how it felt when your mother disowned you?" Kendall also asked, causing me to tense defensively. I did remember, unfortunately, and it was something I preferred not to dwell on.

"Imagine the same situation, but daily. Imagine the crowd at the ball filled with familiar faces, judging, yet making no move to make you feel comfortable. Imagine them doing just the opposite, making you feel as if you were never quite what they wanted," he explained, letting silence fill the space between us.

I huffed again, replying with, "I still think you're being a big baby." But a smile was on my face.

He quickly noticed, amusement flaring in his eyes along with a spark of mischief that hid in the depths. I opened my mouth to call him out on it, but before I could, he reached out, yanking my arm. He caught me by enough surprise that I lost my balance and stumbled against him.

"I believe this is where I am supposed to use the line that Lex taught me," Kendall murmured into my ear, his own amused eyes staring at my startled ones. I wasn't quite sure what to make of the situation.

I was leaning against him, our bodies pressed against one another. His arm was around me tightly as if to restrict me, but I could easily break away. At the moment, though, I wasn't sure if I wanted to.

"I have had you in here for but five minutes, and you are already falling for me," he said with a smile, his own joke clearly hilarious to him.

Even though he'd introduced the joke beforehand and it was entirely corny, I still found myself blushing and not able to keep eye contact with him. His quiet laugh only made me growl lowly. He was enjoying this too much.

"For once, my Snowflake has nothing to say," Kendall voiced, but I couldn't even bring myself to become defensive or come up with a cruel comment.

"This brings me to my next topic of discussion. It is about what happened in the woods," Kendall said and I tensed. I knew where this conversation was going, and I wanted nothing to do with it.

"Nothing happened," I said lightly, trying to pull away gently. But Kendall's arm pressed my body closer to his while the other hand carefully brushed away my hair. It was then that I realized why he held me so closely: so he could study my expression like a textbook and so I wouldn't run away.

"However, something almost happened, love," he said endearingly as if trying to coax a fleeing deer.

It was at moments like this that Kendall mystified me. It was the only time he used a pet name other than "Snowflake" and touched me; this side of Kendall was much less predictable, like an unknown factor. You never knew what you were going to get. I wasn't so sure I liked that.

"Nothing of importance," I replied shortly, waiting for his agreement. However, as I said, Kendall was in a very unpredictable mood.

Kendall's hand dipped under my chin, guiding my head up until my eyes met his own. I could no longer see the amusement in them, but they held softness.

Kendall hesitated, finding the right words, before saying, "You understand there would be consequences if something happened, yes? If we were to act as we almost did, then there could be absolutely no room for emotions such as doubt and regret. I do not believe either of us is prepared for such a big change. Do you understand what I am saying?"

I had heard each word and knew the meaning of them, yet my mind wouldn't comprehend what he was saying. It was as if I'd drawn a blank and my mind didn't want to understand. But I found myself nodding, knowing vocalizing my answer was a complex action right now as my thoughts roared in my ears.

"Then you are free to go," he said simply as if the last few minutes hadn't happened.

His arms unwound from around me and I automatically stepped away, feeling as if I could finally breathe again. Today had been very eventful and not even an hour had passed.

"I suggest you start packing for tomorrow," Kendall said when he reached his desk. He must've noticed my confusion because he ended with, "You will accompany me this weekend when I go to visit my family."

Just like that, my annoyance and anger towards Kendall flooded back.