AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the updated 2022 version of Chapter 06. If you are re-reading this part, you may observe some changes from the previous version.

CONTENT AND TRIGGER WARNING: This chapter contains references to trauma that may be upsetting for some readers. Please be mindful of this sensitive theme and other possible triggers. Remember to practice self-care before, during and after reading.

LORELEI

BILANG BAGONG appointed na chronicler ng QED Club, sinimulan ko na agad ang trabaho ko. Kaninang hapon, isinulat at i-p-in-ost ko na ang first official case namin. Gumawa ako ng bagong blog na dedicated sa exploits namin sa club para mai-separate sa personal blog ko. I did not want anyone reading my online journal where I recorded my experiences and my struggles.

Just an hour after kong i-publish online, may mga nag-view, nag-like at nag-comment na sa post. Ewan kung saan nanggaling ang readers na biglang sumulpot. Hindi ko pa kasi pino-promote sa social media. Nagustuhan nila ang writing style ko at na-amaze sila kung paano namin na-identify ang murderer.

I did exactly what Loki told me to do: Make a buzz about our club and let people know that we existed. Iilan pa lang ang nakababasa, pero na-appreciate ko ang kanilang support. Hindi ko inasahang makararamdam ako ng ganito. Parang gusto ko nang sundan ang nauna kong post.

The more I blogged about our cases, the more readers and clients we would probably get.

Gusto kong i-share ang balita kay Loki kaya lumabas ako ng kuwarto, dala-dala ang aking laptop.

"Hey, gusto mo bang mabasa ang mga comment—" My mouth froze halfway when I noticed his strange posture.

Kaninang pasado four o'clock, nadatnan ko siyang nakapuwesto sa parehong spot, nakakrus ang mga braso, nakadekwatro ang mga binti at seryosong nakatitig sa dartboard kung saan nakatusok ang sticky note na may nakasulat na letrang "M." Pinalitan na niya 'yong retrato ng kawawang lalaki na butas-butas na ang mukha.

Dalawang oras na yata mula nang nakita ko siyang nakagano'n. Hanggang ngayo'y hindi pa rin siya gumagalaw. Nakipagtitigan ba siya kay Medusa kaya nanigas ang katawan niya o sadyang malakas ang impact ng huling salita ni Genesis sa kanya?

I wanted to ask him who or what "Mori" or "Moriya." Hindi ako nakatiyempo kasi parang nawala siya sa kanyang sarili magmula nang ma-solve namin ang case. Napaka-weird na makita siya sa gano'ng kondisyon. Parang lutang siya.

"O, napa'no 'yang kasama mo?" tanong ni Tita Martha nang bumisita siya sa unit namin. Tuwing six o'clock ng gabi, pinupuntahan niya kami para bigyan ng iniluto niyang ulam. Pinapasobra niya talaga para sa amin. Ipinatong niya ang mangkok sa maliit na mesa bago tumabi sa akin.

"Kanina pa po siya ganyan," sagot ko habang nakatitig pa rin sa walang kibo kong roommate.

Napahawak ang mga kamay niya sa baywang at saka lumingon sa akin. "Binasted mo ba si Loki kaya natulala siya? Matagal na rin no'ng huli ko siyang nakitang parang wala sa sarili."

Hindi ko masabi kung seryoso o nagbibiro si Tita. In-ignore ko ang tanong niya 'tapos nagbato ako ng nagtatakang tingin sa kanya. "Ano pong ibig n'yong sabihin?"

Tumingala siya't tila napaisip. "Kailan nga ba 'yon? Mahigit kalahating taon na yata. Umuwi siya na parang pinagsakluban siya ng langit at lupa. Ni hindi ko makausap nang maayos. Meron siyang nabanggit na pangalan no'n. Ano nga ulit 'yon? Ah, basta! Pangalan ng babae, kaso nakalimutan ko na. Daig niya pa ang heartbroken!"

So he already had an episode like this before. I got curious kung ano ang dahilan bakit umuwi siyang gano'n. Parang napaka-out of character sa gaya niya.

"Siya nga pala." Tinapik ako sa balikat ni Tita Martha at nginitian nang malawak. "May good news ako sa 'yo. Baka pumunta ang papa mo rito next week."

Medyo natagalan bago nag-register sa utak ko ang sinabi niya. Lumingon-lingon ako sa sala, naghahanap ng wall calendar para i-check ang date ngayon. "Teka, malayo pa ang Pasko ah. Bakit naisipan niyang pumunta rito?"

"Tinawagan niya ako kanina. Ang sabi niya, may ka-meeting siya sa Angeles City kaya baka dumaan daw siya rito para kumustahin ka." Tanging siya yata ang natuwa sa balita. Hindi ko alam kung paano naging good news 'yon. That was anything but good for me. "O, 'di ka ba excited na makita ang papa mo? I'm sure na na-miss mo siya."

I showed her a forced smile to express how I felt about the announcement. "Halata naman po sa mukha ko kung gaano ako ka-excited na makita siya, 'di ba? I can barely contain my excitement."

"Minsan lang makapunta rito ang papa mo kaya sulitin mo na, okay? Sigurado akong gusto ka na rin niyang makita ulit."

I doubted na gusto niya talaga akong makita. Baka may kailangan siya kaya siya daraan dito sa apartment. Hindi ko masisi si Tita kung gano'n ang tingin niya kay papa. She was not fully aware kung paano ang treatment niya sa akin. If she only knew, baka sermonan niya kapag nagkita silang dalawa. I could tell her, kaso ayaw kong gumawa ng drama.

Nagpaalam na sa akin si Tita Martha bago siya lumabas ng unit. Ni minsa'y hindi lumingon, gumalaw o kumibo si Loki. Dinibdib niya yata kung ano ang tumatakbo sa kanyang utak ngayon. O baka inatake na siya sa puso kaya hindi na siya gumagalaw.

Nilapitan ko siya at kumaway sa harapan niya. No reaction, pero humihinga pa naman siya. Hinawakan ko ang isa niyang balikat, dahilan para bigla siyang mapatayo. Huminga siya nang sobrang lalim na parang muntikan na siyang nalunod.

"Where am I? What time is it?"

"Nasa apartment ka pa rin. Six-thirty na ng gabi. Dalawang oras ka nang nakaupo riyan sa couch."

"My goodness! I fell asleep while I was thinking!" Naglakad-lakad muna siya inunat ang mga kamay niya. "I wasted some precious time by making myself idle!"

Kumunot ang noo ko. He was sleeping the whole time? "Kaya mong matulog nang dilat ang mga mata?"

"I practiced that skill so I can sleep in class without the teacher noticing it." Mukhang proud pa siya sa kanyang talent. "I skip classes by sleeping with my eyes open, especially if the subject is boring. Well, most of them are."

"Ang akala ko iniisip mo ang tungkol sa M na 'yan."

"I was, until Hypnos cradled me in his arms." Kinuha niya ang laptop sa center table at mabilis na binuksan 'yon. "By the way, Inspector Estrada gave me an update earlier about the chemistry lab incident. My hunch is correct."

"What hunch?"

"Genesis was selling the stolen chemicals to an anonymous buyer. The campus police retrieved deleted messages from his phone. He communicated with different unregistered numbers for the transactions."

Iniharap niya sa akin ang laptop kung saan naka-display sa screen ang call at text logs ni Genesis. Nakalagay roon kung saan galing ang message, kailan 'yon na-send at kung ano ang content.

"Bakit naman bumula ang bibig at nangisay ang katawan niya kanina?" Umangat ang tingin ko sa mukha niya. "Nagpakamatay ba siya para hindi malaman ng mga pulis kung sino ang misteryosong ka-deal niya?"

"Pinatay, hindi nagpakamatay," pagtatama ni Loki. Bumalik na siya sa pagkakaupo sa couch at muli niyang tinutukan ang laptop. "According to the autopsy, he was pricked by a needle laced with poison in the nape. Either someone shot that poisoned needle from a short distance or someone went close to Genesis and pricked him."

"Bale pinatay siya para patahimikin?" 'Yon ang conclusion na nabuo ko.

"Exactly. Considering these developments, we can therefore conclude that Genesis was merely a pawn in this grand game. Someone else is pulling the strings. The game isn't over and the case isn't closed yet."

Mula kay Loki, nagawi ang tingin ko sa sticky note na nakatusok sa dartboard. Whoever that "M" was, malakas ang kutob kong may kinalaman siya sa paglason kay Genesis. Why else would the victim mutter that name in his last breath?

AT FIRST, I honestly was not enthusiastic when I became a member of the QED Club. Wala naman talaga akong intensyon na sumali roon. I was somewhat forced to join, remember? But after helping solve the case yesterday, there was a yearning inside me that I wanted more of it. Parang nagke-crave ako.

As what I said before, I was not a detective—nor did I have any intention of becoming one—but the pleasure of putting the pieces of the puzzle together was quite thrilling. Maybe that's the reason why Loki was so obsessed with puzzles and mysteries. It gave him so much satisfaction to the point na naging addiction na siya.

Pero higit pa roon, mas interesado akong makatulong sa mga taong nangangailangan nito. Ako mismo ang proof nito. Hindi gano'n ka-happy ending ang case na kinasangkutan ko, pero hindi ko made-deny na nabawasan ang mga pangamba ko nang ma-expose at ma-expel si Aaron. The victim Isaac would not be able to send his thanks to us, pero kahit paano'y nabigyan namin ng justice ang pagkamatay niya.

Baka 'yon ang pull kaya hindi ko dine-dread ang bawat araw na member ako ng club.

Pagkatapos ng morning period namin, lumabas na ako ng classroom at nagtungo na sa clubroom. Maliban sa pag-solve sa cases na ire-refer sa amin, gusto ko ring makapagsulat ng bagong blog entry. Writing was the perfect distraction that I was looking. Mukhang makatutulong sa akin personally ang pagiging chronicler ko. Maybe we would answer a mystery today that was worth sharing with my small readership.

Loki himself was a huge piece of mystery. Marami pa akong hindi alam sa kanya. No, don't get me wrong. I was not that interested in him. But he got me a little curious. After observing his reaction yesterday, gusto kong malaman kung ano'ng nangyari sa past niya . . . bago pa ako nakatapak sa apartment ni Tita Martha.

"Lorelei?"

I was walking in the hallway of the third floor, my eyes looking straight ahead, when someone behind me called my name. Agad akong huminto at lumingon sa likuran. Nagmadaling lumapit sa akin ang isang babaeng may abot-balikat na buhok. Natatakpan ng full bangs ang noo niya. May suot din siyang salamin na may makapal na black frame. Sa lapel ng blazer niya, napansin kong naka-pin ang metal badge na may korteng shield gaya ng Clark High logo.

"Yes?" I greeted her with a smile.

"Sorry to interrupt you on your way to the clubroom." The female student stretched out her right hand to me. "My name's Margarette Fernandez, HUMSS 12 student. Pleased to meet you!"

May pag-aalangan akong nakipagkamay sa kanya. Hindi ako madalas na nakaka-meet ng estudyanteng nakikipag-handshake sa akin. She might be the first one to do so. Medyo nawi-weird-ohan ako, hindi sa kanya, kung 'di sa pagkakilala niya sa pangalan ko at kung saan ako pupunta.

"Sorry, but do I know you?" tanong ko nang magkahiwalay ang mga kamay namin. Bahagyang naningkit ang mga mata ko sa kanya. "Paano mo nalaman na papunta ako sa clubroom?"

"You're from the QED Club, right? Big fan here!" sagot niya. "I've also read your blog! The chemistry lab case was brilliantly solved and written."

I felt my cheeks turning red. Posible kayang isa siya sa mga nakabasa o nag-comment sa post ko kagabi? Baka potential client siya na hihingi ng tulong sa amin? I would try to be more accommodating.

"Thanks for reading my blog! I appreciate it so much," may kasamang ngiti ang sagot ko. Nagba-blush pa rin siguro ang aking pisngi. "May maitutulong ba ako o kami sa 'yo? We can talk about it in our clubroom."

She smirked. "I think I'm the one who can help you. You don't look like the type of person who's interested in solving mysteries. Be honest with me. Were you forced to join that club?"

"Sorry, but why is that your business?" Pwedeng sabihin na kinonsensya ako ni Loki para sumali. Pero bakit ganito magtanong ang babaeng ito?

"I told you, I want to help you," she spoke slowly and calmly. "Listen to me, Lorelei. Staying in that club won't do you any good. Staying with that Loki will only bring you tragedy."

She spoke of Loki's name with contempt. Ramdam kong may galit siya.

"Sorry ulit, pero sino ka ba? At paano mo nakilala si Loki?"

"You can say I was the closest thing to a friend that he's capable of having."

Parang naintindihan ko na kung ano ang pakay niya. I was somewhat impressed by how subtle she tried to be in her approach.

"Kung iniisip mong sumali ako sa club dahil may relasyon kami ni Loki, nagkakamali ka," paliwanag ko, hoping na ma-enlighten siya at mabura ang maling impression niya sa akin. "I'm just an ordinary club member. Don't consider me a threat to any romantic inclination you might have with him. Now do you mind if you excuse me?"

Hindi ko na hinintay ang sagot niya. Nagpatuloy ako sa paglalakad nang hindi lumilingon sa kanya. Ayaw kong mag-aksaya ng oras at laway sa tulad niyang admirer ng lalaking 'yon. Nagsasayang siya ng effort sa pag-confront sa akin.

"Do you know what happened to his former club member?" she said. "Someone who was also in the same shoes as you?"

Pinilit kong mag-concentrate sa paglalakad patungo sa clubroom, pero my curiosity got the better of me. I turned around and shot her with a questioning look. Nabanggit na kahapon ni Inspector Estrada ang tungkol sa dating assistant ni Loki. This Margarette must also be referring to her.

"Oh, I see. I can read from your face that he hasn't told you about her." She clasped her arms around her body. "You're risking your life for him, but he had not mentioned anything about her when you joined, huh?"

"I'm not risking my life for him or for anyone," I corrected her, rolling my eyes. I spun on my heel and strode off to where I was going. Iniwan ko na siya roon.

She was the second person I met in this school who could get on my nerves. At ano'ng ibig niyang sabihin na inilalagay ko sa panganib ang buhay ko para kay Loki? Unang-una sa lahat, wala akong dahilan para gawin 'yon.

Pagpasok sa clubroom, nadatnan ko si Loki na abalang-abala sa pagtingin sa mga retrato ng case kahapon. Sinuri niya ang photo ng naka-close up na leeg na may pulang tuldok sa gitna.

"Hey," walang gana kong bati bago ako umupo sa monobloc chair malapit sa kanya. Dapat siguro niyang malaman ang tungkol sa babaeng na-meet ko kanina. "I met someone who said that she was the closest thing to a friend that he's capable of having."

"She?" Lumipat ang kanyang tingin sa akin, nanliit ang mga mata at kumunot ang noo. "So you're not referring to my brother, are you?"

"Meron kang kapatid dito?" pagulat kong tanong. All this time, I assumed that he was the only one from his family studying here. At kung meron nga siyang kapatid, bakit hindi sila magkasamang nakatira sa iisang apartment? That would have been the most convenient arrangement kaysa magkahiwalay sila ng tinitirhan. "Hulaan ko. Thor ang pangalan niya, 'no? Gaya ro'n sa Marvel movie?"

"Yes."

Hinintay kong bawiin niya ang kanyang sagot o sabihing joke 'yon. Pero hindi na siya sumagot pa at nagpatuloy sa pagsusuri niya sa photo. Maybe his parents were huge fans of Norse mythology or the Marvel movies that's why they named their children after the Norse gods.

A thought crossed my mind: If Loki was like this, was his brother the same? Nase-share ba sa genes o DNA ang ugali ng isang tao? Imagine kung pareho ng paniniwala at attitude ang magkapatid. One had to deal with two Loki's at the same time.

Tatanungin ko pa sana siya tungkol sa kapatid niya, kaso bumukas ang pinto ng clubroom. Sabay kaming nalingon doon. Pumasok ang isang babaeng kinulot ang mahabang buhok. Mala-porselana ang kutis niya, parang modelo na rumarampa sa fashion show. Masyadong fit ang suot niyang blouse at maigsi ang suot niyang palda—two to three inches above the knee na labag sa student manual.

"Is this the QED Club?" tanong niya habang iginagala ang mga mata sa clubroom.

"If you know how to read—"

"Yes, ito nga! How can we help you?" humirit ako bago pa makumpleto ng kasama ko ang insulto niya sa unang client namin para sa araw na ito. Kung hindi niya matututunang itikom ang kanyang bibig, hindi malayong ma-turn off ang sinumang papasok dito.

Umupo sa monobloc chair na nasa kabilang dulo ng mesa ang babae, nakapatong sa lap ang mga kamay. "My name's Madonna Barcelon, ABM 11 student. Sabi ng friend ko, magaling daw kayo sa pag-solve ng problems kaya naisipan kong i-approach kayo. Nabasa niya kasi 'yong blog about what you did yesterday."

Hindi ko naiwasang mapangiti. Yumuko pa nga ako para maitago 'yon. Here was the proof that my blog could actually help us promote the club and attract clients. "Ano ba'ng problema mo?"

Inayos muna niya ang kanyang buhok. "Have you heard of CHS Confessions? No? It's a Facebook page kung saan pwede kang mag-confess about a secret, your crush or anything under the sun. Yesterday, someone submitted a blind item na sa feeling ko'y pinatatamaan ako."

Humikab si Loki—sinadya niyang lakasan para marinig namin—at saka tumingin palayo. Mukhang hindi siya interesado sa ganitong uri ng case. Nevertheless, kailangan kong i-entertain ang client kahit ayaw ng kasama ko.

Ipinakita ni Madonna ang screenshot ng tinutukoy niyang post.

"Sino ang feeling model na Grade 11 student na iba-iba ang ka-date halos araw-araw? Sabay-sabay raw niyang ine-entertain ang kanyang suitors! At heto pa ang tsismis! Balak din daw niyang gamitin ang nakasusukang charm niya sa pagtakbo sa next student council elections. Have a guess? I-comment na 'yan!"

Ipinasa ko kay Loki ang phone kahit noong una'y ayaw niyang tingnan. Ilang segundo niyang binasa at muling ibinalik sa akin.

"We can confidently assume that you're the one being referred to by that post," Loki commented in a matter-of-fact tone. "It's hardly surprising."

Naningkit ang mga mata ni Madonna sa kanya. "Excuse me?"

"Judging by your choice of—"

Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin bago pa niya maituloy ang balak niyang sabihin. Dalawang type of comment lang ang pwedeng lumabas sa bibig niya: either insensitive o offensive. Alin man doon, hindi na 'yon kailangang marinig ng client namin.

Alam kong kaya niyang basahin ang history ng isang tao sa pamamagitan ng powers of observation and deduction niya. But it could turn people off. Kung gusto niyang sumikat ang club at gumanda ang reputasyon nito, kailangan matuto siyang pumreno sa pananalita niya. Kailangang niyang mas maging sensitive.

"Bale, gusto mong malaman kung sino ang nag-confess tungkol sa 'yo?" tanong ko para maibalik sa topic ang discussion namin.

"May hinala na ako kung sino ang posibleng nag-leak ng info na 'yan," tugon ni Madonna. "I have three girl friends na sinabihan ko tungkol diyan. Kahit na sinabi kong huwag nilang ipagsabi kahit kanino, I think one of them is responsible for this. Who else can it be?"

"First question." Itinaas ni Loki ang kanyang hintuturo. "Are these friends of yours in the same circle?"

Umiling si Madonna. "No. One is from the same class, the second is from the theater group habang 'yong pangatlo ay member ng music club na part ako. Hindi pa yata sila nagkakakilala."

"Second question." Sunod na itinaas ni Loki ang kanyang hinlalato. "What do you think is the motive behind the blind item?"

Napatingin sa taas si Madonna, mukhang sinusubukang alalahanin kung bakit magagawa ito ng kaibigan niya. "Puwedeng naiinggit siya sa beauty ko kaya naisipan niyang ikalat ang secret ko. Puwede ring gusto niya akong siraan dahil tatakbo ako sa student council next year."

Seryoso ba talaga siya sa balak niyang pagtakbo sa council? Ayaw kong maging judgmental, pero walang kahit anong bakas ng pagiging student-leader si Madonna. Hindi nga siya sumusunod sa nakalagay na guidelines sa student manual tungkol sa dress code. Pero kung sikat siya at maraming maaakit sa charisma at ganda niya, guaranteed na ang pagkapanalo niya. Kailangan niya lang magpaganda at magpa-cute sa mga botante.

"Now that you've heard my problem . . ." She crossed her legs and looked at Loki and me. "What can you advise me?"

"Bakit hindi mo isa-isang i-confront ang mga friend mo at tanungin kung sino sa kanila ang nasa likod n'on?" Ako na muna ang sumagot matapos magkaroon ng sandaling katahimikan. "Kung talagang friend mo siya, magiging tapat at totoo siya sa 'yo. You can settle whatever differences you two might have to save your friendship."

Loki let out a bored sigh and fidgeted with his fingers. "That's so boring. Why don't you try a much more entertaining way of exposing your friend?"

Anong entertaining way ang pinagsasabi niya? Gusto niya bang gawing complicated ang problemang nangangailangan ng simpleng solusyon?

"There's no guarantee that your friend will come clean by merely talking to her. She'll deny it to death. So why don't you set a trap for her, lure her in, and capture her?" dagdag pa niya. Nakapagtataka. Kanina kasi, parang wala siyang ganang pakinggan ang problemang ito. Now he sounded somewhat interested. What changed?

"So paano?" tanong ni Madonna.

"Tell each of your friends a secret. Make sure that you won't be telling them the same information. Pretend that you're seeking for an advice. Tell them that you've already told your other friends or you're about to tell the same thing. Give them the illusion that whatever info you tell them has been already shared or will be shared to other people."

"At paano makaka-help 'yan?"

"Here's how it will go. Tell Friend #1 that you like red. Tell Friend #2 that you like blue. Tell Friend #3 that you like green. If there's a post on CHS Confessions tonight or tomorrow saying that you like green, you'd know instantly who leaked the info."

"Sa tingin mo, that will work?"

"Trust me, it's the only way to expose the rat among your peers."

I saw the doubt etched on Madonna's pretty face. Wala siyang ibang choice kundi sundin ang trick na s-in-uggest ni Loki. May kaunting duda ako na one hundred percent magwo-work 'yon. Nang wala na siyang maitanong sa amin, tumayo na siya't nagpaalam na aalis na.

Medyo dismayado ako sa problemang ini-refer niya sa amin. I expected something that was more mind-boggling, 'yong mapapaisip talaga kami. Wala ring action sa kasong 'to. Parang question and answer portion sa isang beauty pageant. Hindi ko masabi kung gugustuhin bang basahin ng subscribers ng blog ko ang ganitong klaseng case.

"Don't be sad. That happens quite often," sabi ni Loki. Malamang napansin niya ang nakapintang disappointment sa mukha ko. "Not all problems are gems. We also don't encounter crimes every day, unlike in detective stories. Get used to it."

Maiba pala ako. "Kanina, parang gusto mo nang paalisin si Madonna. Pero bakit bigla kang ginanahan na tulungan siya?"

"The moment she mentioned student council, my interest was piqued," sagot niya habang paikot-ikot sa swivel chair. "Her popularity is a threat to anyone who wants to run for a seat in the council. What will you do to defeat her? Sling mud at her until she becomes dirty and undesirable in the eyes of the voters."

"Pero June pa lang ngayon. Napakaaga naman yata ng demolition job sa kanya?"

"Kill the fire before it spreads. Pluck out the weed before it grows." Huminto siya sa tapat ko at itinuro ang daliri sa akin. "If I intend to run for the student council next year and I find out that you also plan to run, as early as now, I'd clip your wings. If this is truly about the elections, the one behind it is a forward thinker. They used one of her friends to dig up some dirt on her. Friendship is indeed a double-edged sword."

Since he brought up that topic, ngayon na siguro ang tamang panahon para banggitin ko ang isang bagay na ilang araw ko nang pinagtatakahan. "Ikaw ba, kahit kailan, hindi mo naisipang makipagkaibigan kahit kanino?"

"Why should I? I told you before, friends are only excess baggage in my life." Muling inikot ni Loki ang upuan niya, mukhang umiiwas na pag-usapan naming. "Once you befriend someone, you allow yourself to be vulnerable. Your enemies will have something to use against you. Look at what happened to our client. So why take that risk?"

"Pero ang sabi ni Inspector Estrada kahapon, mas approachable ka raw noon. At ang sabi pa niya, meron kang dating assistant. I assume that she was also a member of this club."

Tumigil ang upuan niya sa pag-ikot, nakaharap na siya sa bintana at nakatalikod sa akin. "That's until I realized how dangerous it is. Friendship has its cost. If you're willing to pay for it, then go ahead, make some friends. But if not, you better lock yourself away from the rest of civilization."

Naintindihan ko ang point niya, pero parang ang pangit na mabuhay nang gano'n.

Muli siyang umikot sa akin pagkatapos ay biglang tumayo. "Before this topic goes any further, let's end it now. I also need to buy my favorite brand of canned coffee."

May mga tanong pa ako, lalo na tungkol sa dati niyang assistant. Sinubukan kong i-open, pero mukhang iniiwasan talaga niya. Hindi ko siya mapipilit at ayaw ko rin siyang pilitin kung ayaw niyang pag-usapan.

I wondered what really happened to her.

Kinabukasan, binisita ulit kami ni Madonna sa kaparehong oras ng una niyang pag-consult sa amin. Sinasagutan ko noon ang assignment namin sa Oral Communication nang pumasok siya sa clubroom. Agad kong itinabi ang aking notes para pakinggan siya.

"At first, I didn't believe that it would go exactly as you told me!" himutok ni Madonna bago humila ng monobloc chair at umupo roon. Compared sa fresh look niya kahapon, stressed siya ngayon. "Alam ko na kung sino ang traydor sa friends ko."

"Congratulations," walang ganang komento ni Loki habang nagbabasa ng libro. Hindi niya nilingon ang client namin pagpasok nito. "Expect more disappointment in the future when it comes to friendship."

"I confronted that bitch this morning." Halos suminghal na ang client namin sa sobrang galit. "Ang sabi niya, napilitan daw siyang gawin 'yon dahil may namba-blackmail sa kanya."

"Blackmail?" ulit ko.

"Kapag hindi raw siya nag-share ng information na makasisira sa 'kin, siya raw ang masisiraan ng image sa buong campus. After all the trust that I've given her, tatraydurin niya ako? How dare her!"

Kung titimbangin, naipit sa komplikadong sitwasyon ang friend niya. Handa ba siyang isakripisyo ang sarili para protektahan ang kaibigan o handa ba siyang sirain ang tiwalang ibinigay sa kanya para iligtas ang sarili? Well, that ex-friend chose the latter, the more convenient choice for her.

"Be careful with who you trust," payo ni Loki na tila isang friendship guru. "Make sure you aren't keeping a snake that will bite you in your own backyard."

Patuloy pa rin ang pag-iling at pagsinghal ni Madonna. Tumayo rin siya at padabog na lumabas ng clubroom. Ni hindi man siya nagpaalam o nagpasalamat sa amin.

Nang matapos ko na ang assignment, lumabas din ako ng clubroom at pumunta sa washroom. Hinugasan ko ang aking mga kamay bago tumingin sa salamin para i-check kung maayos pa ang itsura ko. Napatalon ako sa gulat nang napansin ko ang babaeng nakilala ko sa hallway kahapon, nakatayo sa likuran at tila pinanonood ako.

"You seem to be enjoying his company," Margarette greeted, annoying me with that smirk across her lips. "Are you being drawn to him or to the mysteries surrounding him?"

Nagkatitigan kami sa salamin, hindi ko na siya kinailangang harapin. "Sinusundan mo ba ako? Nandito ka ba para guluhin na naman ako? Kung may problema ka kay Loki, bakit hindi mo sabihin sa kanya?"

"I'm here to help you, not him."

"But you're not helping me. Your presence is becoming a bother, lalo na ngayong mukhang ini-stalk mo ako. Why are you so obsessed with him?"

She went closer to the mirror and stood beside me. She shot me a menacing side-glance. "You leave me with no other choice but to tell you a thing or two about Loki—pieces of information that only a few people know."

Umangat ang kaliwang kilay ko. "At bakit mo gagawin 'yon?"

"So you can decide whether to stay with him and his club or save yourself from further risk."

I was torn between listening to what she got to say or plugging my ears and walking away. Hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit gusto niya akong mawala sa tabi ni Loki. If she was romantically interested in him, she was pushing it too far. In the first place, there was nothing going on between me and Loki except for being clubmates and roommates.

But in the end, I accepted her offer of information. Pagkakataon na rin ito para mas magkaroon ako ng ideya tungkol sa lalaking lagi kong kasama araw-araw. Ayaw ni Loki na mag-share sa akin ng ilang bagay tungkol sa nakaraan niya. Hindi ako desperadong malaman 'yon, pero makatutulong'yon para mas maintindihan ko siya lalo na't mukhang matagal kaming magsasama sa apartment at sa club. Now here's someone willing to give me a glimpse. Ang palay na ang lumalapit sa manok, tatanggihan ko pa ba?

"Go ahead. Tell me what I need to know."

"Do you know the song that he holds dear in his heart?"

"No." Ano'ng kinalaman ng favorite song ni Loki?

"Do you know who Rhea is?"

Kung tama ang pagkakaalala ko, si Rhea ang recipient ng tina-type na email ni Loki kahapon. Mukhang kilala rin nitong si Margarette ang babaeng 'yon. Teka! Baka siya ang dating assistant ni Loki sa club? "I don't know who she is, but I accidentally read an e-mail that Loki was composing for her."

"Oh?" Bahagyang nanlaki ang kanyang mga mata at napabuka ang bibig niya. "That's still going on? Until now? Seriously?"

Mas maa-appreciate ko kung magiging straight to the point siya, hindi 'yong paligoy-ligoy pa. "Ano ba'ng kinalaman ng mga tanong mo sa 'kin?"

"Those are hints to what happened more than half a year ago. Do you really want to know?"

I nodded. My eyes narrowed as I listened to what she had to say.

SINCE THE day I met him in Tita Martha's apartment, Loki had been already mysterious and twisted in his own way. That was a fact. But after hearing what Margarette told me, parang bahagyang luminaw ang image niya sa akin. Well, that suspicious girl did not share everything that I needed to know. She wanted me to fill in the blanks. Mas gusto niyang sa bibig mismo ni Loki manggaling ang connection ng favorite daw niyang kanta at kung sino nga ba talaga si Rhea.

Pagsapit ng six o'clock ng gabi, lumabas ako ng kuwarto matapos kong gumawa ng assignment. Nadatnan kong nagta-type sa laptop si Loki. Mabibilis ang pag-press ng mga daliri niya sa keys. Posible kayang nagko-compose na naman siya ng email para kay Rhea?

Lumapit ako sa may pintuan. Mabuti't hindi masyadong maulap ngayong gabi. Mula rito, kitang-kita ko ang mga kumukuti-kutitap na bituing walang sawang nagniningning sa madilim na kalangitan.

Muli akong lumingon kay Loki at naalala ang sinabi ni Margarette.

"If you really want to know the truth, sing that song and make sure he hears it."

I stared at the bright stars scattered across the dark dome outside. Why I was following that girl's instructions, I did not know for sure. But a voice in my head that wanted to confirm if everything she had said was true.

Huminga muna ako nang malalim. Three. Two. One.

"Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are~" Mahina ang aking boses, pero siniguro kong maririnig ni Loki sa puwesto niya. "Up above the world so high. Like a diamond in the sky~"

Biglang huminto ang tunog ng pagtipa niya sa likuran ko. Hindi muna ako lumingon sa kanya. Was he mesmerized by the song or was there something else?

"Twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are~"

"Stop."

"When the blazing sun is gone. When he nothing shines upo—"

"I SAID STOP!" Loki roared like a lion. Doon na ako napalingon sa kanya. His stoic face went dark with rage. His dull eyes ignited with fire and threw daggers at me. In such a rare moment, he finally lost his cool.

Napalunok ako ng laway habang nakipagtitigan sa kanya. For a minute or two, walang nagsalita sa aming dalawa. Natakot ako sa itsura niya. Parang ibang tao na ang kaharap ko.

"I don't know if it's a mere coincidence that you sang that song in my presence or someone told you how much I hate it," sabi niya sabay iwas ng tingin sa akin. Medyo kumalma na siya kaya medyo nakahinga na rin ako nang maluwag.

Nagtaka ako kung bakit gano'n ka-exaggerated ang reaksyon niya sa isang nursery rhyme. "Does it remind you of your tragic childhood? Do you have a grudge against Mozart who composed a tune of that song?"

"Do you wanna know the truth? Fine." His voice was shaky, so he was trying to control his tone. "Whenever I hear that song, it triggers not my childhood memory, but a tragic one that I'm struggling to seal away. That song was being played the moment I found the lifeless body of someone close to me. Someone whom I can consider my friend. My only friend."

Ramdam ko ang pighati sa kanyang boses at sa mga nalalawa niyang mata. The cold mask that he had been wearing everyday fell. In front of me was a more human Loki.

Napaturo siya sa dartboard kung saan nakatusok pa rin ang sticky note na may letrang "M" nang hindi kumakalas ng tingin sa akin. "And that man—be it Mori, Moriya, or whatever—was behind it. Now that you've learned a bit of my past, are you satisfied? Or do you wanna know more? Do you want me to describe how my friend looked like when I found her dead? Do you want me to tell you how many stabs her fragile body sustained?"

I was left speechless by his agitated tone. May trauma ako kaya alam kong may trigger ang bawat tao. If I had known that singing that song would make him snap, I would not have sung it at all. Tonight, I saw a side of him that he probably showed rarely to anyone.

"I'll be in my room." Kinuha niya ang laptop at mabilis na dumeretso sa kanyang kwarto. "If you wanna know more, just knock twice. I'll answer whatever questions you may have. Fair enough?"

Pero hindi ko na hinintay pang makapasok siya sa kuwarto. Ibinato ko na agad ang isa pang tanong na nasa isip ko. Bubuksan na sana niya ang pinto nang bigla siyang tumigil at humarap sa akin.

"If that friend of yours is dead, bakit nagpapadala ka pa rin ng email sa kanya?" tanong ko. "You call her Rhea, don't you? Short for Rhiannon?"

We exchanged stares for a minute.

q.e.d.

Project LOKI Volume 1 (Collector's Edition) is still available on PSICOM Publishing's Shopee and Lazada stores for only ₱650. The package includes (1) book with author's signature, (2) bookmarks, (2) postcards, (2) sticker pads, and (1) magnetic bookmark.

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