CHAPTER 36
THE PLEASURE

"THERE'S some kind of Force connection between Commander Ren and Rey," Raena spoke clearly. Her knees were pulled up to her chest as she sat on her bed, her room door locked. She held up her comlink close to her mouth, still warily looking around at her chambers. "I've witnessed Kylo Ren speaking to her, but at first I thought he was talking to himself. He explained to me that he's able to connect his mind with hers at various points. Kylo Ren is able to make Force mind links like this himself, but from the look of his confusion, I'm guessing someone else linked their thoughts together."

With a heavy sigh, Raena turned off her comlink, setting it in her ear once more. Her whole room was dark, not a single light shown through. As Raena sat against her pillows, she felt a wave of nausea invade her. This new revelation made her brain toss and turn. Something was coming. Something bad was going to happen soon. In these moments, Raena would have been excited to see what was to come, but not even she was prepared.

Thoughts of turmoil caused Raena to move in her bed every hour. She barely got a wink of sleep. She had been planning to sleep in more once she finally got comfortable, but unfortunately for her, she was woken up by someone banging their fist on the door. With tired eyes and drool dotting her chin, Raena lazily pressed her hand against the console by her door, and the entrance slid open, revealing Gerardo on the other side. He held up his hands, blinking his eyes rapidly. "What are you doing still in bed?!" He tapped his foot impatiently. "Blaster practice, remember?"

Leave it to Raena to be late for her own teaching session. Her and Gerardo had been scheduled today to teach a random listing of cadets to shoot a level A blaster, made best for trainees. When Gerardo and a baggy-eyed Raena finally showed up to their training session, all the cadets looked at them with wide eyes. Regardless, Raena clapped her hands loudly and screamed, "LOOK ALIVE!" How ironic.

After assisting each of the ten trainees with their blasters, Gerardo demonstrated a usage tactic, and then Raena did the same. "Soon enough," she said, grabbing her favorite blaster rifle that she would use on important missions, "you all may be upgraded to this baby. But that's down the road." Raena turned, gesturing to the many targets that were placed at the end of the small gymnasium. She picked a section in the middle, placed her feet apart in front of the target line, and fired a blast. It hit the target square in the head. Raena turned to the cadets' shocked expression. "Easy peasy."

The two higher-ups stood behind as the cadets trained themselves with blasters. Raena then sat on a stool, while Gerardo stood to her left with his arms crossed on his chest. She rubbed at her eyes lazily, trying to perk herself up. She made a mental note to grab any form of caffeine in the mess hall after this.

"Why were you so tired this morning?"

Raena looked up at Gerardo's question. Her eyes were red from rubbing them. "I ... I don't know," she lied, watching a cadet fire a blast at the wall. "I couldn't sleep last night. A lot of things on my mind."

Gerardo lifted a brow. "Anything you want to talk about?"

She wanted to tell him yes. There were so many things she wanted to talk about, but Raena had already shared too much with Gerardo, and whatever he knew, Pacey would also know. She did like having both him and Pacey in the know, but at the same time, she needed to keep some things to herself. She could figure this out on her own, at least she hoped. So Raena turned her head towards him and shook her head.

•••

A blaster was placed in Raena's tight holster. Though her eyes were heavy and they yearned for sleep, she knew she had a plan for today. She hardly gave the Resistance any valuable information, and though they weren't her main focus of her true plans, she had to provide what was asked of her. Raena knew the exact place to find special information, and that resided in a room she was once intimate in.

Raena walked down the dark corridors near the end of the Supremacy, careful of wandering eyes. She passed by groups of cadets and stormtroopers, some who saluted to her and others who didn't. Raena tried to keep her breathing even, as if nothing was wrong, while quickly walking down the dirty floors. She needed to be as inconspicuous as possible. She even lied to Gerardo that she'd be sleeping. Raena silently wished it wasn't a lie.

She speedily turned down another hall. There was no one left. His chambers were down an isolated hall, one that no one was allowed near. Raena swallowed hard as she fast-walked down the narrow corridor and to the jet black door. She halted her movements, suddenly frozen in place.

What if he's there? He shouldn't be. She saw him in a meeting before she headed here. What if someone saw her? People did, but no one saw her down this hall. Raena looked over her shoulder. She saw no one. What if she found nothing? At least she tried.

Kylo always locked his door with a passcode. Most people, like Raena, locked their door with a handprint. The commander had always thought a passcode was better, even though it was less safe. Although, the numbers he used were "secretive," he told he once. They were the date of his birthday, a day no one on the ship knew, besides Raena Nhagy.

She punched in the code on the console beside the door. She bit her lip, hoping it was still the same numbers, and then the door slid open. Raena blinked, swallowing down the lump in her throat. Taking her first step into the Kylo's chambers was cold, because Raena was reminded of all the memories she had in these rooms. Her hands formed into fists as she moved inside. Everything was ... cold.

Raena placed her hand near her ear, and she turned on her comlink. She breathed in deeply before announcing, "I'm in Commander Ren's chambers." She closed her eyes before looking around the area around her. Raena shook her head, softly whispering to herself, "What am I actually doing here? This isn't going to work."

She looked behind herself, noticing the door had shut on its own. Raena walked quietly around the room. Her hand glided against the comforter on his bed, and she realized she did it unknowingly. She quickly took it back. Raena looked to his bedside table, finding an empty glass and an unused tablet. She brought the glass to her nose and sniffed it – alcohol. "Looks like someone has a drinking problem," she whispered, instantly remembering she had her com turned on. "Oh, yeah. Okay, I'm searching his bedside table."

Raena cocked her head to the side when she moved the empty glass. "There's ... a ring here," she said, picking up the light object. She examined it thoroughly and held it close to her eye. "It's engraved. 'To ... my son.'" Raena instantly dropped the ring, throwing it back on the table. That seemed personal. She definitely wasn't supposed to see that.

Hastily adjusting her posture, Raena continued her search around the room. The blinds, like always, were open, showing the bright world outside his most intimate place. Raena approached the window, placing her hand on the glass. "There's nothing here," she sighed. "Absolutely nothing." Her vision moved to the right, where his old Vader helmet still sat. With a shake of her head, Raena turned off the comlink.

"This was useless," she chastised. Raena was so sure she'd find some kind of secret plans lying about. She approached his bedside table again, frowning as she powered on the tablet. It took a moment to turn on, but eventually, Raena was engulfed by a bright light. She searched through his files, looking through all the blueprints. "Nothing," she whispered.

She was completely bewildered. There was no way he wasn't keeping anything. Not even plans typed out to secretly kill her. She checked his notes. Nothing! Leave it to Raena to think it could be this easy, but was this the easy way out? It did take a special level of crazy to sneak into the commander's room.

"Yeah, me too."

Raena froze in place, slowly turning her head in the direction of the deep voice. It was near, yet also far from where she stood. Her hands began to shake. No, no, no, she thought to herself. This isn't happening. Her premonitions were confirmed when she heard his voice again say, "I didn't hate him."

Her fingers were still clutching his tablet, the bright blue light illuminating her face. Her breathing was heavy. She couldn't move. In any other circumstance, Raena would be running instantly. She knew how to escape a bad situation, so why didn't her feet allow her to move? Nothing was holding her back.

"Why what? Say it." Kylo's voice came from the next room. It was low, but Raena heard it. He was talking to Rey, she knew it. Raena had all these moments to leave, but thoughts ran through her brain. She was consumed by everything: the coldness, his voice, her movements. "No. Your parents threw you away like garbage."

Raena heard his footsteps coming closer. She slowly began to walk forward, hands continuing to hold the tablet that she needed to let go of.

"They did. But you can't stop needing them. It's your greatest weakness. Looking for them everywhere: in Han Solo, now in Skywalker."

Raena's foot crunched down on something. She gasped, looking down to see her foot pressed down on a belt. Raena's eyes were wide. Her head shot up, and there he was, staring at her with his mouth slightly open. One of the best assassins and bounty hunters in all of the galaxy, and she fucked up on a tiny search through a comrade's room. She rapidly removed her foot from the belt loop, taking another step forward towards the door. Raena's hands were shaking violently now. She dropped the tablet to the floor. It landed with a loud thud.

Kylo's teeth grit. "Officer Nhagy," he greeted, "to what do I owe the pleasure?"

•••

A/N: I HAD TO LEAVE THIS ON A CLIFFHANGER OR IT WOULD BE SOOOOOO LONG I'M SORRY

Also!!! I just wanted to make clear that I'm trying to portray a toxic/manipulated relationship in this. Raena's changing nature (especially, how she begins to act throughout the rest of Book III) is NOT because she's being an idiot. She describes her relationship with Kylo Ren as being in a pit, and her falling back into said pit will cause her to act unnaturally. His relationship with Raena, like I specified in the author's note of Chapter 31, is tricky. They share an emotional connection, but it's also full of manipulation. He treats Raena almost like he treats Rey: he needs her for power and as a military asset, and her caring for him before also helps his questioning identity.

You will begin to see in further chapters that Raena is going to start to question if she should go through with her own selfish desires (meaning, her plans to kill him) or if she should do the right thing (meaning, to help bring him back to the Light for Leia's sake, even though that will go nowhere). In the end – and I mean, the Real End™ of this story – there will be ending that will satisfy everyone. I've been planning the final ending to this story for a while now, and I know it will be satisfying!!!

So yeah, just wanted to explain myself there lol. Honestly, if there any any questions about their relationship, just ask!