Best. Week. Ever.

In the seven days leading up to the dinner our two families were having for no more reason than 'we haven't yet,' Rae and I texted every day. Most of it was suggesting songs and bands, trying them, and then writing back our opinions. Some of it was complaining about family, though, in comparison to her mom and dad, I didn't have much to say about Mom, Phil and unidentified sperm-donor-Dad. We even said we missed each other once or twice.

Except for some hyper-animated late night talks with Charlie, and one very boring screening of Into The Woods, nothing happened of interest in those seven days, and that's why we are going to jump all the way to the night of the dinner.

I pounded on Phil's door with urgency.

"What?!" he yelled from inside his room.

"Gimme my tie back, jerk, I need it!" I shouted. He still hadn't given me back my tie from when he wanted to impress Rae at the TPing.

I waited a second. He swung open his door and shoved the tie through. I caught a glimpse of his outfit.

"Hey, get the hell back out here!"

"STOP YELLING!" my mom screamed from downstairs.

Phil opened his door with an exhausted look on his face. "What?" His eyes floated down, and he realized that we had basically the same outfit on. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"We can't wear the same thing!" I exclaimed. "People are gonna think we were trying to match!"

"Well, why are you wearing a suit?" he asked. "Why don't you wear a dress or something?"

"You did not just tell me to wear a dress."

"You know, just because you got a girlfriend doesn't mean you have to be this hard-core lez all the time."

"Just because you're a giant, fucking dumbass doesn't mean you have to be a giant, fucking dumbass all the time."

"Touché. But one of us has to change. We can't wear the same thing."

"Yeah, but who?"

Our mom ran up the stairs with a camera. She squealed and held her camera to her eye.

"You two look so cute!"

The flash went off, and we both wretched.

"I'll change," Phil said.

"Yeah, you will," I said. He slammed his door closed, and I sprinted to my room, shut the door before the paparazzi could close in.

Half an hour or so later, there was a knock at the door. Phil and I both came shooting out of our rooms and zoomed down the stairs. We positioned ourselves at the door, like a much less rich-and-incesty Cheryl and Jason Blossom, and opened the door. The wide smile on my face diminished to a 'what the ever-loving fuck' frown.

"Ariel?" I asked at the sight of her. Ariel was the girl who, alongside Rae, Willa and I helped clean up the old dude's toilet paper-covered yard. Well, 'help' might be an overstatement.

"Who're you?" Ariel asked. I sighed for what seemed like years.

Phil looked like an idiot as his eyes shifted between us. "Wait, Jacky, how do you know my girlfriend?"

"Your girlfriend?" I said disgustedly.

"Wait, right — Jack. I remember you," she said. "You're the hot one's friend."

I sucked my lips into my mouth and blinked twice. "We're dating now," I said. Something about Ariel made me wanna be a bitch.

"'K," she scoffed, and walked through the door. She was wearing what looked like a corset, and a long sheer cardigan.

I moved over to Phil, my eyes wide like they were trying to escape my head.

"She wasn't invited," I said. "This is unexpected. I didn't prepare for this. But even so, I'm not gonna kill you, 'cause mom's gonna kill you."

"I know."

I rested my elbow on the banister and kneaded my forehead with my thumb. I was so preoccupied with Don Johnson-ing a jacket from the thrift shop I forgot how I hate dinners and socializing and having people around me and people. But the though of seeing Rae in person calmed me down.

Another knock on the door startled me. I turned twice in a circle before gathering myself and opening the door. I smiled wide again, only to have a frown immediately take its place.

"Ooo, looking tasty, Jacky," Logan said, walking past me and taking a seat on the couch. Reg was right behind him. Simon would have been there, too, but he dumped their posse the day after the TPing.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I said. By this point, I felt as though I was the chaperon at the dinner (which was now looking more like a party) as my mom got rice in her hair and had to take a last minute shower.

"We're just here dropping off the CD player," Reg said, looking me up and down.

CD player? Mom is literally going to kill Phil. I'm gonna have to cover up the murder. I'll have to barrow a bone saw and maybe a jumbo-blender from someone. But then they'd be in on it... okay, stop it, Jack, figure this out later.

"Maybe we'll get lunch tomorrow," Phil said to Reg and Logan.

"I'm doing something tomorrow," Ariel said.

"Maybe we'll get lunch in two days," Phil said.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, look, we gotta bail, we're gonna go TP Simon's house," Reg said. He sprinted out of the house without saying goodbye, leaving the door open for Logan.

"We'd invite you, too, but you're here, so... see ya," Logan said, waving briefly to Phil, who seemed restless in a completely Phil-ish way. Logan walked over to me on his way out. He put his face awkwardly close to mine. I tried not to back up. "See you soon, yes?"

"No," I said.

"We'll see." He said, winding his arm around my back and pulling me close. I could feel his breath on my face, and my stomach tightened. I pushed him away.

"Get out," I commanded. He backed away slowly, making the kind of eye contact that would make a pervert squirm. I heard a knock on the doorway, and there, standing behind the threshold, was the entire Watters family. Logan tramped past Rae — giving her a wink, because that's what you do when you're a douchebag — and into the dark street.

Rae marched in the house and put her hand on my shoulder. "Ugh, he is terrible. You okay?"

I watched Logan walk down the path and down the road to meet up with Reg. I could feel my blood boiling.

Rae tipped my head up with her index finger and looked into my eyes. Her eyes were like fire works reflected in a muddy puddle, and her mere presence made me feel better. 

"Are you okay, Jack?"

"I am now," I whispered — so her parents couldn't hear. She smiled.

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