"Zee!" Simon's rushed shout filled my ears, making me pull away from Clary, stood in the Ops Center.

I looked at him, a soft smile forming on my lips, "Simon-"

Simon rushed to me and stopped in front of me, then hugged me so tight he lifted me off the ground, "Hey-"

"Hi, Simon-" I held my best friend tightly.

Simon pulled away and looked at me, staring at me, "Am I dreaming?-"

I lightly shook my head, "No-"

"I'm not?" Simon hugged me again but tighter when I shook my head once more, gripping me tightly.

Simon stepped back when Isabelle walked over, wrapping her arms around me tightly, hugging me as well.

"Tell me where Jonathan is." Isabelle grabbed my arms when we pulled away, "I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch with my bare hands."

I opened my mouth, then closed it.

"You can't." Jace answered for me, "None of us can."

Clary looks at him, "Why?"

"Lilith- carved this rune into me, right before Simon's mark sent her back to Hell." I pulled on my shirt and showed them the rune, "I didn't know what it was at the time- until, I found out- the hard way."

Alec explained it for me, "The rune ties Zee's life force to Jonathan's."

"Hurt one of them, you hurt the other in the exact same way." Luke followed.

"Which is why I sent an alert out to the other Institutes." Alec brought up a profile on Jonathan on the screen, "Jonathan must be captured alive."

"When he took me to Paris, he was hell bent on looking for this sword- the Morning Star." I mentioned, my hands dropping to my sides, "He didn't tell me why he wanted it- but, if we can find it first, maybe- we can track him down."

Simon looks at me, "Another magic sword?"

"Unfortunately." I exhale, "He said it was some sort of Morgenstern family heirloom."

"I'll reach out to all the weapons masters to get intel." Isabelle offered, crossing her arms.

"I'll draw all the ley line junctions in the city." Magnus nodded once then looked at me, "If Jonathan moved the apartment, we'll find him."

"Thank you-" I said, then looked between all of them, "All of you."

My voice suddenly got quiet, feeling overwhelmed with emotions, "I honestly don't know where I would be- without any of you- if you hadn't found me-"

Simon softly smiled at my words, seeing my vulnerability, "That's what family's for, Young."

"All right, let's get to work." Alec had a soft expression on his face as well, before nodding towards everyone, as they did as told, leaving me alone with Jace.

Jace slowly walks over to me and stands in front of me, gently putting his hands on my arms, his eyes connecting with mine, "You okay?"

"As long as I'm with you, I'm always okay." I slowly slipped my arms around his middle and leaned my head against his chest, taking in his scent.

Jace wrapped his arms around me tightly, leaning his cheek against the top of my head, "I love you."

"I love you." I squeezed tighter, my eyes closing for a moment, swooning at the thought of being with him again, feeling like I had escaped from all my problems by just being with him.

"May I see it?" Jace pulled his head away from me a few seconds later to look down at me, his voice quiet.

"Yeah-" I nodded lightly and let go of his middle.

Jace's hands touched my skin delicately, his fingers glazing over my chest, his other hand gripping my shirt and lightly pulling it to the side, setting his eyes on the rune, his movements followed by silence.

My eyes scanned the look on his face when he looked back into my eyes, "Jace, what is it?"

Jace swallowed, "I think I've seen it before."

-

"It has to be somewhere in one of these books-" I set another pile of books down on the desk, opening one quickly, skimming through the pages to find the rune that was carved on me.

Jace's eyes watched me skim through the many pages of the book I was going through, his stare making chills run up my spine, "Listen, this could take a while-"

"I know- that's why I'm helping you," I didn't glance at him and kept going, my eyes fixed on trying to find the rune.

Jace pauses for a few seconds, before speaking again, "Why don't you get something to eat?-"

"I'm not hungry-" My eyes scanned a page, "I can eat when we find some intel on the rune-"

"Zee, you've been going nonstop since you got back." Jace continued to watch me, "You need to take a minute-"

"I already had a minute earlier, when I reunited with everyone-" I tried my best to stay focused while still having this conversation with him, "I don't have any more minutes-"

"Hey-" Jace grabbed my arm gently and stopped me, "Listen, I thought I'd lost you forever."

I looked into his eyes, my expression softening, "Jace-"

"I missed you- so much." Jace rested his hands on my shoulders, "And now that I have you back, all I want is to stop, just for a minute- no Jonathan, no Lilith- just you and me."

"I missed you so much more." I felt guilty, huffing lightly and looking down, "I'm sorry- I know, I've been- terrible, but- Jace, I can feel him."

This made Jace go quiet.

"Whatever he does- whatever he feels, I can feel and it's so infuriating- because I don't want to feel him-" I slowly wrapping my arms around his middle and laid my head on his chest, holding onto him tightly, my voice quieting down, "I'm trying so hard to push him away- but, it won't work-"

"I'm sorry, I'm- I'm trying to remember." Jace held me back tighter, looking away for a few seconds, trying to put his finger on where he had seen it, "I was young- I was a kid."

I looked up at him, "Well, if it's something you learned at the Institute, it would be here."

"But- I didn't just study at the Institute." Jace suddenly looked at me, realization dawning on him, "We've been looking in the wrong place."

-

"Paradise Lost?-" I watched Jace as he set the book on the desk, in front of us.

"This edition was illustrated by a special sect of the Silent Brothers, Seers." Jace began telling me, opening up the book, looking through the pages, "Valentine made me memorize it."

I looked at the book, "Why?"

"He was obsessed with Lucifer's war on Heaven, and his clash with his brother, the Archangel Michael." Jace opened up to the page and pointed to it.

"Jace, Michael and Lucifer weren't just siblings." My eyes scanned the image that was wide on the page.

"They were connected-" I pointed to their chests, "With the rune."

"Look, at this one-" I then pointed to the next page, where the rune was no longer on Michael's chest, "The rune is gone-"

"Michael vanquished Lucifer." Jace filled me in, looking at me, "He must have found some way to separate himself."

"So, there's a way-" Hope erupted in my chest, a small smile forming on my lips as I looked at Jace, forgetting for just a moment that I could feel Jonathan, "We just have to find it-"

But, in came my reminder when my palm started to burn, a gasp of pain leaving my lips, my head snapping toward my hand, seeing my skin scorching red, starting to bleed.

"Zee, what's going on?" Jace rushed to my aid immediately, grabbing my palm to look at the burn, "What's wrong? What's happening?-"

"It must be Jonathan-" I clenched my jaw, trying to hold back my screeches, but I couldn't help but let out a cry of pain, "Damn it-"

"He's burning himself, here-" Jace pulled out his stele quick at the sight of me in pain, his hand gently pushing my hair out the way and activating my Iratze, the burn disappearing, "It's stopped-"

I stare my palm, as Jace's fingers touched over where the burn once was, before holding my hand in both of his and kissing it.

"He's going to keep doing this." My jaw remained clenched, tears glossy in my eyes because of the pain I had just felt, "He's going to keep reminding me every time I forget-"

"Not for long, okay?" Jace held my hand tighter in his, "We'll figure it out- we'll find a way to get the rune off you-"

I stare at him, before nodding lightly despite not believing it, a tear falling from my eye as I moved into his embrace, hugging onto him tightly.

-

"Okay-" I sat down on the bed, dropping my jacket to the side, "Let's get this over with."

"It's gonna be painful." Jace held a device that supposedly removed runes, one that we thought we would try to remove my rune, looking at me, hesitant, "Are you sure you're ready for that?"

"If it'll get it off, yeah." I nodded lightly at him, "The more it hurts me, the more it hurts Jonathan, right?"

Jace sighed lightly, before grabbing my shirt and lightly pulling it to the side, before using the device, my eyes widening at the pain I had suddenly felt.

I gripped the side of the bed, my jaw clenching at pain, my breathing becoming heavier with every stab of pain I felt, tearing forming in my eyes.

Jace noticed my expression, an unhappy look on his face, "I can stop-"

"No, no- keep going, keep going-" I tried to tell him in my normal tone, but couldn't help but scream just a little in pain, trying my best to stay strong.

But, the longer I felt the pain, the stronger it felt.

I broke, leaning forward and away from Jace, a small shriek of pain leaving my lips, the tears in my eyes slipping.

"Hey, Zee-" Jace set the device down quick, his hands moving onto me, one on my back, the other on my arm, "I'm so sorry, are you okay?-"

"It's okay- I'm okay." I breathed heavily when the pain slowly disappeared to a sting, moving to pull my shirt to the side, "Is it gone?-"

Jace sets his eyes on the rune that was still there, a small sigh leaving his lips, "No-"

-

I stood in my room, dead silent, hugging myself.

I was so deep in thought.

Trying to separate my urge to get rid of Jonathan from my plead to be okay with my family.

To have my life back.

But, what I didn't realize was I already had it back.

I had been so caught up with the thought that I could get the rune off me.

And letting Jonathan brainwash me into making me entire purpose about him, wasn't going to be how I was going to live my life.

All Jace had been trying to do since I got back was get me to see that I was with him now.

I was with him again.

I no longer cared if Jonathan was going to remind me that I was tethered to him for life.

Because I was here.

Away from him.

And that was all that mattered to me now.

My door quietly opened, hearing someone's footsteps walking in, closing the door behind themselves, the most recognizable voice of my boyfriend sounding the room, "Zee, we're gonna figure this out- I promise you."

"And if we don't?" I slowly turned and faced him.

Jace stares at me, lightly shaking his head, "We will- I won't let you go through this for the rest of your life- I'm not letting you go through it alone-"

"Jace," I dropped my arms, "I don't care-"

Jace looked at me, going silent.

I exhale slowly, taking a step closer, "I'm sorry that I let the thought of getting rid of this rune, get in the way of us."

Jace slowly walked toward me and stood in front of me, lightly shaking his head, "Don't apologize-"

"But, I am- I should be- I got so caught up in trying to figure out how to get him away that I forgot about what really matters the most." I stared into his eyes, my voice falling quiet, reaching up and lightly grabbing his face with my hand, "You."

"I love you." My voice had fallen into a quiet whisper, feeling vulnerable, while my eyes were locked with his, showing pure emotion, "I want to take that minute now-"

"I love you, Zee." Jace grabbed the hand of mine that held his face, "And I'll love you until I die."

Jace's voice fell into a whisper as well, "And if there's a life after this, I'll love you then, too."

I don't say anything else, I just close distance between us, pressing my lips into his, grabbing his face with my other hand as well, pulling him down into me.

Jace's hands slipped down to my waist, deepening the kiss, holding me gently, moving his arms completely around my waist.

I moved my hands onto his shoulders and jumped up, wrapping my legs around his waist, bringing my hands to his hair, the kiss that we shared moving into quicker, growing more intense.

Jace pulled away for air, but didn't move his face away from mine, leaning against the wall, his hot breath fanning my chin, "Are you okay?-"

"I'm fine-" I closed the distance again, gripping his hair with one hand, pressing my lips into his roughly.

Jace groans lightly into the kiss at me tugging his hair, then pulls away from the kiss once more, "I meant- are you sure you want to do this?-"

"Yes, Jace." I ended the conversation right then and there, grabbing his face and kissing him once more.

Jace didn't pull away this time, instead, he turned and pushed me into the wall, holding me up by my thighs, pressing up against me, a small sound escaping my mouth and muffling against his lips.

-

Jace's soft snores filled my ears as he laid next to me, the only thing covering both of us being the sheets on my bed that night.

It was late, and Jace had fallen asleep a little while ago, the only light in the room being the moonlight that shone through the window.

A small smile formed on my lips looking at him, running a hand through my messy hair, holding the sheet to my chest, when I felt a piercing pain on my arm, making me hiss quietly and sit up quickly to see what was happening.

I hugged the sheet to my chest, holding at letters that were being carved into my arm, small grunts leaving my lips, trying not to wake Jace.

Then the words were clear.

The message Jonathan had carved for me.

I miss you.

authors note:

i tbvh really love this chapter

how jace treats zee >>>

i missed writing zace, awh

thank you for 30k!

go read redamancy !!

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