Last Part
Here's the last part of this ts which I would like to dedicate to all my patient readers.
A few special mentions, though :
Hope u all would love this last part...
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Reaching buaji's house, Arnav was about to press the doorbell when he heard Khushi's screams coming from her room, through the open window. Scared, he rushed towards the window, to hear her mumbling "He won't understand. He won't.. again" Before he could fathom her words, he heard her ordering her family to pack their belongings as they are leaving the city right away.
Rage he had never felt before, rushed through his veins seeing her ready to go away leaving him just within a few hours of promising him of forever togetherness. He jumped inside the room through the window alarming the occupants with his words & now he was standing in front of the two women of which one COULD BE the reason behind his ruined past & the other IS the reason behind his beautifully carved present.
Arnav babua?!..." buaji whispered to the tension filled air.
Shashi stared at Arnav, aghast at his sudden entry. Whereas, Garima was too shocked to react.
But Arnav's furious, red eyes were stuck on Khushi's fearful, pale face.
She raised her guilty eyes & swallowed seeing the superhuman effort he was exercising to control the storm within himself. But his trembling body screamed of the turmoil he was going through. For a third person, it must be just extreme anger but she knew better. Along with burning ire, he must be feeling hurt, played & cheated; not only by his dead father's paramour but by his own love, too.
His adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed the tears to reign in his emotions that were threatening to devastate every single thing in his vicinity.
His eyes shifted down to her trembling lips. The sweet petals he had kissed & tasted innumerable times a few hours ago, still he was left with an insatiable thirst. The lips, which had explored his hard frame with equal fervour, silently promising him to never leave him. Then, how can those same honey filled lips utter such bitter words that could break his heart into pieces?
A sob left from Khushi's mouth when she met his accusing eyes with her own bleak ones. She clutched her dress tight, controlling herself from reaching out to him because she knows that that would be the last thing he would want her to do, for now.
"Aunty.." he called Garima, his tone nowhere soft. "This.." he brandished the photo in his hand. "is enough of a proof for me to hate you."
Garima shuddered at the coldness in his voice.
Khushi glanced at her scared mother & back to her furious husband. Her heart was thumping erratically in her chest, spreading panic rapidly in every fibre of her body anticipating a humdinger of destruction in his next words.
"But, my first hand experience has taught me that our own eyes & ears could deceive us" He said with his eyes on Khushi's pasty face. "then, this... is just a photo. So... not jumping into conclusions, I'm here to know...your side of the story" He struggled to swallow as it was too hard for him to talk calmly to Garima after knowing that a simple & docile woman like her, whom he had started to respect just like his mother, was involved in any way with his libertine father.
A rush of relief washed through Garima on getting a benefit of doubt from her son in law, who is the son of the man responsible for a very painful part of her past life.
Khushi stared at Arnav with shocked eyes & her ears perked up in disbelief hearing his words.
His eyes, though cold, conveyed that he was not going to repeat the same mistake he did with her.
Hope fluttered in her pounding heart. All is not lost, yet.
Garima looked at her husband who blinked his moist eyes at her, lending his silent support.
Garima nodded with increasing admiration for this God-sent blessing of a man who is her husband.
"Bitwa.." Garima started. "Thank you for giving me a chance to prove my innocence" She joined her hands & touched them to her quivering lips.
Arnav didn't bother to respond, just stared at her with cold eyes.
"I was staying in a rented house with my father in Bareilly & for livelihood we had rented a small shop where we sold sarees & shawls. I used to help babuji in the shop. We didn't earn much but it was enough for the two of us. One day, in my absence, your father came to our shop & asked for a Banarasi saree. My babuji was displaying him the stock of the same when I entered the shop. I asked babuji to go home for lunch & I would handle the customer. Babuji acceded & left from there. I started pulling out more Banarasi sarees to show to the customer when suddenly he said that he asked for simple cotton sarees & not the heavy ones to donate for the women in destitute homes & old age homes where he donates a part of his earnings every month. I frowned at his words but then shrugged thinking that babuji must have misheard owing to his old age. Giving an apologetic smile, I moved all the Benarasi sarees aside & started showing simple, cotton sarees as per his demand. He was taking his own time in selecting the sarees, simultaneously talking to me in a very friendly way, filling me with the details of his hometown, his business & all the charity work he does. He told me that he was all alone as his parents had died a few years back & he doesn't have any siblings either. But now, he was longing for a companion to share his life with. I was just smiling at him courteously. But inwardly, the damsel in me was already charmed by his handsome face & friendly nature. His well toned body & charming features hid his actual age for me to doubt his intentions" She shook her head in self disgust at her immaturity & foolishness of that time.
Arnav could concur with Garima as his father was indeed a charmer of his time & his sweet way of talking just added to it.
Garima continued. "To my pleasure, he bought 5 sarees & 5 shawls which was a very big profit in one day for small shop owners like us. I was very happy, not only monetarily but personally, too, as he also seemed equally smitten by me & my assumption proved right in the next few days with his regular visit at our shop at regular intervals under the pretext of buying sarees & shawls for donation. But I knew better."
Arnav remembered his father's suddenly increased visits to Bareilly during that time. Where his family thought he was working so hard in setting his new business there but in reality he was actually busy in setting a very dirty business.
"I didn't mind his frequent visits as I was also yearning equally to meet him, talk to him. He used to come at lunch hour only when babuji would be gone for at least 2 hours as he would take a small siesta after lunch & there would be no other customers, too, in the afternoon. We would talk about everything under the sun. He told me that he stays in Lucknow where he has a flourished business which he wants to expand in other cities, too. He said he was setting up a textile mill in Bareilly that would give livelihood to the poor. I fell more for him at his thoughtfulness & generosity. He got gifts for me on his every visit which I refused to accept but he was too insistent to accept my refusal & I had to keep the gifts. He tried to take liberty with me on 2-3 occasions but I didn't respond due to my own inhibitions. Time flew by & within a few months of our acquaintance we came very close to each other." Garima accepted shamefacedly. "On one such visit of his, he proposed to me for marriage & I was over the moon, gushing over my good fortune to get such a loving life partner. But still, I refused his proposal. On his insistence, I told him that I can't leave my babuji alone & that was the only reason I was stalling my marriage talks with all the alliances, everytime we got one. He assured me that I don't need to leave my babuji or the city, as after our marriage we would settle down in Bareilly only where babuji can stay with us, in our home & he (Arvind) would travel between Lucknow & Bareilly to manage his business. I was delighted to hear that & asked him to talk to my father & that very evening he came to meet my babuji. He managed to please my babuji, too, with his flattering persona, sweet talks & his tell-tale of his charity works. My babuji agreed for our alliance. After two days, he got shagun for me. The pic you are holding was taken on the same day" She said gesturing to the pic in his hand & swallowed a lump of bitter memory.
"Our wedding was fixed after 2 months. Babuji & I started with the wedding preparations. We were going to have a simple wedding, not wanting to burden my babuji with the expense. Khushi's parents; my jiji & jijaji couldn't attend my shagun as jijaji had just got transferred to his job in Kanpur & couldn't get a leave. So, they were supposed to come just 2 days prior to the wedding" Garima glanced at her daughter whose eyes saddened more at the mention of her dead parents & more tears rolled down her eyes slashing not only her mother's insides but her Arnavji's heart, too.
Placing a stone at her heart, Garima continued further. "Arvind kept on travelling between Lucknow & Bareilly. Usually, he would be back within a week but it was more than 10 days, he hadn't returned from Lucknow. I had no means to contact him. Babuji & I were very much worried. So, I went to his textile mill in Bareilly & met his manager. Whatever he told me, pulled the ground beneath my feet. He said that Arvind's daughter's wedding was fixed suddenly & that's why he was not back to Bareilly " stream of hot tears kept rolling down her eyes, remembering the betrayal.
Arnav recalled how his dii's wedding was fixed within a week's span as the groom's dadi was severely ill & wanted to see her grandson's wedding before she dies. Therefore everything was rushed & arranged in very less time.
"I was shocked to the core knowing that Arvind was lying & cheating me all along. Now all the things were clear to me. Him suddenly asking for cotton sarees instead of heavy ones on our first meet at my shop, being overly sweet, flaunting his charity work, lying of being an orphan & unmarried, me resisting his advances & his sudden marriage proposal, obliging me by keeping my babuji with us after our marriage, everything was to hide his truth & to trap me for his dirty desires" Garima gnashed her teeth, angry at herself for foolishly falling in that cheater's trap.
"Not the one to sit & lament, I took his Lucknow address from the manager & taking all the gifts & shagun given by Arvind, I set out for Lucknow to extract answers from the cheater himself. When I reached there, I saw Sheeshmahal decorated as a bride & realised that it must be Arvind's daughter's marriage. Contemplating whether it is a right time to meet Arvind or not, I decided to wait in a corner of the garden, away from prying eyes till the wedding gets over. But to my goodluck & Arvind's bad luck, he happened to come there to receive some guests when he spotted me. He immediately reached me. Seeing my accusing eyes & all the gifts in my hands, he understood that his dirty secret was out in front of me. He roughly pulled me by my hand to a nearby small room in the garden. The moment we were inside, I threw all his gifts on his face & demanded answers for his treachery. He again tried to trap me by saying that he fell in love with me the moment he saw me for the first time in my saree shop. He tried to infuse in me that he loves only me & not his wife who was never his choice but his parents forced him to marry her."
Arnav clenched his fists wanting to disfigure his father's face for sprouting such lies & demeaning his mother's love.
Garima continued. "He said that he was with his wife only for their children. But once his daughter's wedding is done he would leave his wife & come to me forever. The fog of his fake love had already wiped out from my eyes so I could clearly see that he was lying again. I screamed my grievances & slapped him across his face. That very moment his mother, Subhadra Mallik entered the room & pushed me for slapping her son. She accused me of being a gold digger & trapping her already married son for money, clearly giving a clean chit to her bigamous, leecher son just because he was a man, belonging to a rich & high status family. She abused me with all the dirty words in the dictionary while Arvind stood there listening to everything like a mute spectator. Angered, I threatened the mother-son duo to reveal everything to Arvind's wife. That's when real Arvind surfaced who gripped my hair & threatened me to kill my father if I so much as thought to go near his wife. He very shamelessly proclaimed that he can use & throw innumerable women like me in a blink. I should consider myself lucky that he was taking pains to marry me instead of keeping me as his mistress. He ordered me to go home, he would come after a few days & we can calmly sit & talk on the matter. Seeing his monstrous side all my courage vanished into thin air. I was terribly scared, not only for myself but my babuji, too. As I started to leave, he didn't forget to remind me of his threat. I was shaken up & scared to my bones. I don't remember how I reached home. I cried my heart out in my father's arms. My poor babuji couldn't bear the deceit & died suffering a heart attack. My jiji & jijaji, who came for his last rites, took me with them after that. I was considering myself responsible for my father's death. If not for my jiji's support, jijiaji's motivation & little Khushi's cute antics & sweet talks, I would have killed myself way before. But destiny had more pain written in my fate & involved Khushi, too, in it. Jiji & jijaji had to go for a relative's wedding in Lucknow. I didn't want to set foot in that cursed city, so I refused to go with them. While returning from the wedding, their bus met with a severe accident & alongwith many other passengers, my jiji & jijaji, too, died on the spot. Whereas, Khushi survived by devi maiyya's grace" they saw a silently sobbing Khushi, reliving the nightmare again.
"Shashiji, who was jijiaji's close friend in Lucknow got the news & reached the accident spot. After completing the legal formalities, he came to Kanpur with a traumatized Khushi & my Jiji-jijiaji's deadbodies. My whole world shattered that day & all I was left with was my gudiya, my Khushi, who was so traumatized by the accident she witnessed that she had lost the ability to even react, let alone cry."
Arnav remembered Khushi telling him about her parents' accident, her fear of dark, fear of speeding vehicles & her fear of sleeping alone.
"After a few days we had to leave jijaji's house too as it was a rented one & I had no source of income. Shashiji was kind enough to invite us to stay with him in his house, in Lucknow. But I resisted as that would again take me to the city, I abhor. On his insistence, I had to reveal him the reason that's when he told me that I need not worry on that any more as Arvind Mallik & his wife had committed suicide on their daughter's wedding day itself, which later didn't happen at all. I was shocked to the roots. I did curse Arvind for ruining my life, but never wished such devastation for him or his family. I would never wish something so devastating for my worst enemy then Arvind was my first love. Believe me Arnav bitwa, until that day, I was absolutely unaware of whatever happened after I left Sheeshmahal" she urged, earnestly.
She was blissfully unaware but Arnav wasn't that fortunate as he was the eye witness to the apocalyptic happenings of that fateful day that caused an irreparable destruction to his family. The loud noises from the garden cabin, his mother running towards her room with his father following behind, the ear piercing gun shots, his parents' dead bodies lying in the pool of their own blood, his sister's screams, the whispers & murmurs of the guests, the breaking of his dii's marriage, him liting his parents' pyres, his uncle throwing his dii & him on the roads. Every painful, horrendous memory made a blasting comeback at the mention of that catastrophic day.
He swallowed hard to dislodge the painful lump stuck in his throat. He inhaled & exhaled sharply to ward off the images & voices which were after so many years still potent enough to absorb his entire being in its vortex.
Khushi saw the devastation written all over his face. She was about to run to him but his scaring, heated stare stopped her & she felt her feet sink further into the ground in helplessness. Her pleading eyes failed to melt his burning heart which was filled with extreme ire for her to allow her to reach out to him.
Gathering his bearings, he diverted his attention back to Garima who felt his pain but this has to be done today. So she continued further.
"Accepting everything as devi maiyya's wish, I went with Shashiji to Lucknow, taking Khushi along" Garima slowly moved towards Shashi's wheelchair & sat at his feet, holding his hand on his lap drawing courage from him.
"Shashiji was a widower with a 10 year old daughter, Payal. His widow sister, Madhumati jiji stayed in Delhi. But she would keep on visiting us frequently. Slowly, with the help of Shashiji & Payal, we got Khushi back to life. But when was life so easy on us. Soon, neighbours & community started gossiping & whispering ill about Shashiji & me. Madhumati jiji suggested that Shashi ji & I get married. That will not only shut the dirty, gossiping mouths but we will become a family in true sense, where we will get a partner in each other to rely upon & both our girls will get their parents. After much contemplation, we both agreed & got married in a temple in front of Devi maiya, jiji, our daughters & a few close relations. Shashiji's kindness didn't end there. He legally adopted my Khusi & gave her his name & surname" she looked at her husband with affectionate eyes. "I don't know what I would have done, where I would have gone with Khusi, what would have happened to us if Shashiji wouldn't have given us shelter & protection of his love & care. I owe you my life Shashiji, I owe you my life" she murmured sobbing, touching Shashi's palm at her cheek.
Buaji's eyes weren't dry either.
Khushi felt a new rush of emotions & adoration for her babuji for all the unconditional love & support he had been showering on her since the day he had made her his daughter not only legally but heartily, too
Shashi pressed his fingers more on Garima's wet cheek asking her to stop crying.
Garima nodded understanding his unsaid words. Wiping her tears, she slowly raised herself from the floor & moved back to her previous place near Arnav & continued.
"I thought that Arvind's chapter was closed forever from my life. But I realised how wrong I was when I saw your dadi Subhadra Malik at my door steps, where she had come to bad mouth my daughter the same way she did to me, years back. All the painful memories made a blasting comeback & along came the realization that you are Arvind Mallik's son whom I couldn't recognize due to your changed surname. After over hearing your dadi's accusations & dirty names for my Khusi, I was determined not to let your marriage happen with my daughter. But seeing the love in my Khushi's eyes for you & the way you stood against your dadi for my Khushi, my resolve weakened. I understood that you are nothing like your father & your love for my Khusi is pure, unadulterated. I decided to let this marriage happen but without my presence. Therefore, I tried my best to stay away from all the pre wedding rituals in order to not catch your dadi's eyes. But again, devi maiyya had different plans. But this time, all good in store for my Khusi. Finally, the hide & seek game ended between your dadi & me in your house itself. After the initial, expected outburst, later she surprised me by accepting my Khusi, by giving her your mother's kangans. I can't tell you how relieved I was that day knowing that my Khusi would not suffer the same fate as I did" she smiled mildly, glancing at her daughter before continuing.
"Arnav bitwa, I may not be able to forgive your dadi for whatever she did to me but I would be forever grateful to her for not punishing my Khusi without any fault of hers & for letting this marriage happen."
Arnav scoffed inwardly. Only if she knew his dadi's true face.
"Believe me Arnav bitwa, every single word I said is nothing but absolute truth, without a tinge of lies. I swear on my husband & my daughters that I was totally unaware of your father being already married when I met him. I had no idea of the storm that blew away your world after I left Sheeshmahal. I was clueless that you were Arvind Mallik's son until I saw dadi. I have no bad intentions. All I want is my Khusi's happiness which lies in you, with you. Please don't doubt me or my Khusi's love for you." Garima pleaded. "Still, if you want to punish then punish me & not my Khusi. She is absolutely innocent in this whole debacle. If you wish, I will go away from both of your lives & you will not have to see me ever again but please don't abandon my Khusi. She loves you with her life & even the thought of you hating her drove her crazy which we all witnessed just a while ago. Please Arnav bitwa. Please. Please. Please." Garima cried, joining her hands in front of Arnav who immediately held them in his.
Garima's pleading eyes reminded him of Khushi's pleading, anguished visage when she had requested, begged him to believe her; once on their way to RM from GH & second time at the airport when he was leaving for London. Even though his heart had believed her eyes but his shrewd brains had shushed it to be one more facade, one more deceit of hers. He had failed to read the truth, failed to believe the innocent eyes then but he won't repeat the same mistake again. History was repeating itself. But with a change in the characters. His dii was standing in his mamma's place, Shyam-his father's, Khushi was cheated just like Garima aunty & just like Shashi uncle supported Garima aunty during the whole rigmarole, he; Arnav Singh Raizada was supposed to support Khushi which he failed the first time. But not again. Never again.
"You don't need to plead to me nor you need to go away from your daughter, aunty." Arnav said, shaking his head & Garima looked at him, surprised. "Because I believe you, aunty. I believe everything you revealed is just truth & no lies" he added, nodding his head & Garima let out a cry of relief, kissing Arnav's hands again & again mumbling 'thank you, bitwa' as the tears of gratitude rolled down her eyes, wetting his hands.
He gently wiped Garima's tears.
"Don't thank me, aunty because if your daughter loves me with her life then I also love her to death. If just a thought of me hating her drives her crazy then just a little bit of distance between us is enough to stop my breaths & she knows that very well, aunty" his eyes darted darkly at Khushi who was standing like a statue, with her eyes lowered but his words were gripping her heart with more guilt.
"Khushi is mine, aunty & this marriage is inevitable. Nobody can stop it from happening. Nor your past, nor my past, nor dadi, nor you. NOT EVEN KHUSHI HERSELF" his intense & chillingly formidable words raised goosebumps all over Khushi's body.
"I can move heaven & earth together to make Khushi mine. Nothing & no one can stop me from making her mine. She belongs to me & shall stay with me only till my last breath" he proclaimed. His unwavering gaze still strongly glued on Khushi's lowered face, wanting her to absorb every word he spoke in every single fibre of her body.
The firm assertion in his voice, the unyielding determination in his words, forced not only Khushi but her parents & buaji, too, to jerk their heads upwards at him. They literally shivered seeing the potent emotions & raw passion in his red, hot eyes.
All the three elders looked at their daughter who was standing at the same place, without uttering a word since Arnav made his shocking appearance. The same girl who was stubbornly adamant a few hours back on not only leaving this house, this city but her life - her Arnavji as well was now staring at the same man without blinking her eyes. Her now sober countenance was completely in contrary to her frenzied, berserk form of a few hours ago where she was screaming her lungs out saying that 'her Arnavji won't understand anything, this time, too' which was completely contradictory to what Arnav declared so passionately, right now, in front of them.
"Aunty" came Arnav's steely call, jerking Garima out of her thoughts. "I have once made a huge blunder by not recognizing the truth. I have once failed my love by not believing in my love but I won't let the same happen again. This time, my love will conquer at any cost" he declared profoundly but the equivocal meaning behind his words just increased his in-laws' confusion.
Not letting them ponder more over his words, Arnav said "Aunty, it's quite late. You all need to wake up early in the morning. Forget all the worries & without any fear or tension just go & have some rest."
Even though his tone was soft but the authority in his voice compelled them to obey him. Also, they understood his need to talk to Khushi, all alone. They wanted the couple to resolve their issues & live a blissful married life.
Nodding her head, Garima caressed Arnav's hair affectionately, thanking him again to which he smiled back at her with equal affection.
Then Garima went to her daughter & held her delicate face between her hands. "Are you okay, bitiya?" she asked, her eyes & tone laced with concern.
Khushi could just nod with a small smile.
Kissing her forehead, Garima wheeled Shashi's wheelchair out of the room, followed by buaji.
The moment they left, Arnav strode to the door. Khushi flinched at the loud noise of the door banging shut by him. But the moment he turned around, she literally jumped in her place seeing the blazing fire back in his eyes. Perspiration formed at her forehead seeing his flexed jaws & clenched fists which gave away his self control. Her insides were clenching & unclenching as breaths whooshed out of her fearing his reaction.
Arnav's whole body was trembling with rage but his heart was alerting him to go easy on his love.
He had always been very sensitive when it came to Khushi, regardless of whatever the matter is. A moment away from her, a tiny thought of her not being in front of his eyes, even a single bout of air to breath without her fragrance, triggers strong, powerful emotions in him terrifying him out of skull & the same is happening right now. He felt a bottomless feeling rush through him as Khushi's words of going away from him were echoing in his head. The fear of her acting on her words someday if not today was mercilessly clawing at his heart. He breathed in & out as anguish hit him hard. His eyes prickled with unshed tears. He rubbed his chest as the aching intensified & he had to press his balled fist to his mouth to stop himself from screaming.
Khushi's heart thudded violently in her chest expecting the volcanic eruption any moment.
"Arnavji" she whispered, mustering some courage.
"Don't" he gritted forwarding his hand, pointing his index finger at her, angrily. "Don't you dare, Khushi. Don't you dare to open your mouth" he warned her, shaking his head vigorously.
She pursed her lips tight, looking at him with fraught eyes. His intimidating gaze was boring holes in her heart. He was about to march towards her when he saw her pushing herself more into the wall behind her, fearfully. As if she could dig a hole in it & hide herself from his angry form.
He growled audibly, seeing her again ready to drift away from him. That just aggravated his anger & he couldn't hold his tongue from sprouting an involuntary expletive.
Khushi grimaced, clutching her dress tight.
Trying to calm his raging nerves, he started pacing the room, breathing harshly, running his fingers through the thick mass of his hair. His heart contracted in his chest as the pain was too overwhelming.
"Arnavji" she tried again but regretted immediately as Arnav reached her in two long strides. Gripping her neck from behind with his one hand & with the other he pulled her to himself roughly by her waist & slammed his rough lips on her quivering lips, swallowing her gasp of surprise.
He kissed her mercilessly, pouring all his anger, pain, fear, anguish, inflicted in him by her few recklessly spoken words. Giving her just a few seconds of respite to draw air to breath he captured her lips again to punish them for uttering such words which scared the shit out of him. Khushi let him have his way with her, expecting him to calm down a bit so that she could make him understand her reasons. He kissed her again & again till her lips went numb, devoid of any sensation.
Gasping for breath, he rested his forehead against hers. "How could you Khushi? Just how could you?" came a low growl through his constricted throat. "Is it that easy for you to go away from me, leaving me all alone to die without you?" he asked, his tone a mixture of anger & hurt, whilst two tears meandered their way down from the corners of his eyes landing on her cheeks, mingling with her own flowing tears. "After whatever we went through, after all the hurdles we passed to make our love win, how could you think of going away from me, giving up on our forever togetherness, on our MAIN AUR TUM, HAMESHA?" he breathed sharply, as producing another word without breaking down became impossible.
She bit back a sob as his accusations penetrated her soul, cutting her from within.
He rubbed his rough lips on her forehead & moved down to her earlobe.
"Answer me Khushi " he whispered in her ear & trailed his sinful lips down her chin caressing her smooth cheek on the way, sparing her bruised lips. Reaching her shoulder blade he gave an open mouth kiss on the visible hickey given by him not so long ago in his farmhouse.
Even though his gestures were nowhere gentle but still Khushi couldn't stop the involuntary moan escaping from her mouth which soon turned into a painful hiss as he bit on the delicate skin at her svelte neck.
"Answer me, Khushi" he demanded again, lapping his tongue on his teeth mark on her smooth skin.
"I'm.... I'm sor... sorry, Arnavji," She whimpered & it cut through him.
"Sorry isn't enough, Khushi. Sorry isn't enough" he hissed, burrowing his face in the crook of her neck. His rough stubble & hot breath singed her already burning skin over there.
"I was scared" her voice turned shallow as a lump of painful memories hindered her speech.
"Of me?" He rasped due to the onslaught of emotions. But a lungful of her intoxicating fragrance & her warm body in his arms helped him to balance his equilibrium, as usual. Whereas Khushi hyperventilated, clutching his shoulders tight as his proximity created havoc in her senses, as usual.
"Not you, Arnavji" she croaked, shaking her head.
He raised his head from her neck. Fisting her hair in a firm yet gentle grip he tilted her head backwards raising her face upwards. Her breath hitched as his red rimmed eyes stabbed her heart.
She could see his furious lips again aimed at her trembling lips but landed on her throat instead. Smooching her silky skin there roughly, he sucked on the throbbing pulse at the base of her throat.
Khushi clutched his forearms unable to bear the assault.
"Then what were you scared of Khushi?" raising his head, he whisper yelled at her face. His eyes burning with anger & desire, both.
"Let me explain, Arnavji. Please hear me out. Please" she beseeched earnestly, cupping his cheek.
Her pleading eyes & broken voice calmed his anger & desire a bit.
Khushi heaved a relieved sigh at his silent assent.
She framed his face between her palms. "I was scared of your reaction to the revelation, Arnavji" she sniffled. "I have been there once which is enough to last for a lifetime, Arnavji. I can't go through the same hell again," she sobbed, clutching his shirt lapels & resting her head under his chin.
His face morphed in sheer helplessness acknowledging her words. His lips quivered as he reigned in his own broken demeanor.
He squeezed her in his arms, burying his head in her silky traces. She wrapped her arms tight around his torso, resting her cheek against his thudding heart. Her tears were wetting his shirt over there.
"But I apologized to you for whatever I put you through, Khushi & you forgave me as well. Didn't you?" he murmured in her hair, moving his hand down her spine.
"Yes, I did" she agreed, rubbing her cheek on his heart. "But forgiving & forgetting are two different things, Arnavji" she added, swallowing past her cries.
She raised her head from his chest to look in his moist eyes. "It's hard for me to forget those days & nights I spent in pure torment, Arnavji. Every second I have walked on eggshells, terrified that what might be your next accusation?? What other torchure laid ahead of me by you to endure?? Your hot & cold behaviour constantly kept me on edge of whether you would be shaitaan or Rajkumar the next minute?? I have practically lived in the hell of your making just due to a misunderstanding which was again your own doing. Then this.." she paused, looking at him with tormented eyes, unnerving him. "This is very big, Arnavji, that involves your parents & my amma. I know how much your dii & mother mean to you. When just out of a misunderstanding you can torchure & punish the woman you love to avenge your dii, then it's indisputable to say that you won't spare the woman behind your mother's death & that happens to be my amma who is as much innocent in the whole debacle as much as I was in our matter. I was scared, not only for myself but my amma as well" her body was shaking imagining the possible scenarios. Her legs were about to give away but he held her tight to himself.
"The fire you lit to your mother's pyre must have doused years back but the fire of avenging your mother is still burning inside you" she rubbed her palm on his heart. "Which can extinguish only when you get to punish her culprits & I know you can go to any lengths for that. I have had first hand experience which was unbearable still I survived. But my amma.." she shook her head vigorously "she wouldn't have been able to live in the hell hole & maybe I too would have suffered collateral damage in your revenge game again which I wouldn't have been able to survive this time around, Arnavji" her shoulders shook as she cried.
"You don't trust me, Khushi??" he asked incredulously, hurt flashing through his red with restraint eyes. His chest tightened with anger & disappointment.
"I do, Arnavji. I do" she wiped her tears with the back of her palm & placed it on her heart. "I trust you completely with myself. My devi maiya knows, I do" she glanced at the devi maiya's idol on the corner table & looked back in his waiting eyes. "But I don't trust you to trust me when it comes to your family, especially your dii & mamma" she was blunt enough in conveying her feelings.
"You are my family, too, Khushi" he interrupted, sharply. "You are my wife, Mrs. Khushi Arnav Singh Raizada" he reminded her, yanking her to himself.
She gulped. "Yes, I'm" she agreed. "But I come after them & believe me, Arnavji I have no issues if they come before me for you because I know, I have made my own special place in your heart" she placed a kiss on his heart & he sucked a sharp intake of breath. "But, I also know that when it comes to me all your rational thoughts & logics fly away out of your window & your intelligent Harvard brains just go on a long vacation" she chuckled at her own words despite the thick tension lurking between them but Arnav just stared at her face trying to absorb her words. "Then you make rash decisions & act upon them recklessly that result in a disaster. I wanted to save my amma & myself from such a disaster that's why I took that decision in that weak moment because as soon as I heard the truth from amma, all I could remember were the horrendous & traumatic moments of those six months, I endured. But believe me Arnavji, I was equally dying from inside at the thought of going away from you. Believe me, Arnavji" she pleaded & bunched his shirt in her fists as helpless spasmodic sobs wrung out of her, shaking her fragile body.
Arnav felt an errant knot in his stomach & his eyes welled up. But he didn't leave his hold from her.
"I know Khushi that I was nasty, cruel & downright horrible to you. I deeply regret every scathing remark, every scorching word I hurled at you. I'm ashamed of all the emotional & physical torment I caused you. My heart is still melancholic for all the traumatic trials & tribulations I put you through due to my prejudiced view & impulsive behaviour. But haven't we created some beautiful, cherishable moments too that could hold of some importance worth remembering pleasantly? Haven't I changed myself as I realised my mistakes? Haven't I tried to make amendments? Haven't I tried to be the rajkumar of your dreams, Khushi? Haven't I given you enough reasons to trust me that I won't go back to being the shaitaan with you, ever again? Didn't I try to reinforce the trust back which I broke myself, Khushi?" he asked, his voice clipped & hard.
"Yes" she nodded "You did, Arnavji" she shut her eyes, letting her tears fall, unchecked.
"That pic of your amma & my father together was enough of a proof for me to join the dots & unveil the story myself. But I didn't. This time without acting on an impulse, I decided to come here & hear your mother's side of the story. I gave her a chance which I failed to give you back then. Why do you think I did this, Khushi?" he searched for an answer in her eyes. But Khushi was too engrossed in hearing his feelings to give a reply so he himself replied. "Just because OF you. She is your amma & I know how much she means to you. Doesn't all these mean that I have learnt to trust you, Khushi?"
She could just nod her head in admiration at his words.
"Then why couldn't you trust me over this? Why couldn't you believe that we could have talked this out?? Why couldn't you take that leap of faith in me instead of deciding to go away from me, leaving me to die without you??
She swallowed, taking a slow, deep breath. "I agree, Arnavji, I didn't trust you on this when I took that impetuous decision. But I trust you now & always will. I'm so sorry Arnavji. Please forgive me. I promise you I won't even think of leaving you, ever again. I promise. Trust me, Arnavji" she pleaded cupping his face with desperate hands.
"Trust you? Really?" he scoffed, shoving her hands & took a step back in rage. "How should I when you broke the same promise just within a few hours of making it. In fact you would have succeeded, too" he yelled, hitting his fist on the wall behind Khushi who shut her eyes in fear. He hauled her by her arms forcing her to meet her scared orbs to his furious yet moist eyes. "If I wouldn't have reached here on time then you would have already left me by now without looking back.Then tell me how should I trust you??" he swallowed hard, feeling all choked up & left her arms with a jerk.
He swiped his thumb roughly at the corner of his eye when Khushi noticed the bruise on his fingers. She tried to hold his bruised fist but he jerked her hand.
Her heartache intensified. "I'm sorry Arnavji" all she could do is apologize with all her being. "I don't know how to make you trust me on this" she never felt this helpless.
He shook his head in derision at her words. Try as might she wasn't able to ward his fears off. She tried to hold him again but he moved away creating more distance between them that pinched her heart.
"No Khushi. YOU tell ME, how should I make YOU trust ME that there is no life for me without you in it?? That I truly can't live without you" he was taking a step backwards from her with every statement. "That breathing becomes impossible for me without you besides me" he rubbed his face, restlessly. "That my heart threatens to stop beating if you are not around" he thumped his fisted palm on his heart. "That my senses go haywire if I don't get to touch you" he pulled his hair in sheer agitation. "Tell me, Khushi. Tell me. How should I make you believe that you are my life, the only reason behind my existence?" By now he had reached at the middle of the room.
"Arnavji" she murmured
"Tell me Khushi. What should I do? Will you believe me if I go on my knees?" he asked, tears dangling on his eyelids, ready to roll down & they did as the next moment he fell down on his knees in front of her with his hands falling on his thighs in defeat.
Khushi gasped, clasping her mouth with her palm.
"Will this make you believe in me Khushi that I survived my mother's death, I survived everything that life put me through but I won't be able to survive without you, Khushi?" he asked like a lost child.
His torn voice & defeated stance dropped her already aching heart into the pit of her stomach. The angry, howling, growling Arnav Singh Raizada had resigned. All she could see was that 14 year old frightened Chhote in the body of her vulnerable Arnavji, who was very scared to lose his loved one, once again. Then it was his mother, now it's her. If she had her own fears & insecurities then he too had his own. They both were equally broken & in an equal need of the other to live.
Her painful rumination was interrupted by his one more vulnerable utterance.
"If you want I'm ready to beg, too, Khushi. But please don't go away from me" he cried shaking his head vigorously & was about to join his hands when she rushed to him. Dropping herself on her knees opposite him, she pulled him in a bone crushing hug. Arnav embraced her tighter. Their tears rolled down in an endless stream.
Moving back a bit, she wiped his tears, gently. "I would never want to see my Arnavji this defeated, this helpless in front of anybody. Not even me" she kissed his eyelids, one by one. He was just staring at her face with pained eyes. She framed his face between her warm hands. "I'm really sorry for putting you through this emotional upheaval, Arnavji. We both have our own set of hurt, pain, fears, insecurities & vulnerabilities" she said looking into his deep brown orbs. "We will get through all these, together. We will help each other to come out through all these & reinstate the trust in the other" she could see hope flickering in his eyes at her words. "But no more promises. Only pure, genuine efforts. Okay?" she asked with an encouraging smile.
Her assuring words helped him to calm down his anxiety.
He nodded slowly & for the first time in that evening Khushi could see his lips & eyes, both smiling. She placed warm kisses on both his cheeks.
"I don't like this crying & broken Arnavji. I want my shrewd yet cute, arrogant yet considerate, scaring yet caring, dominant yet loving, ASR yet my Arnavji" she demanded, punching his chest gently.
He narrowed his eyes. "Oh really?" he asked, tilting his head at her.
She smiled & bobbed her head like a kid.
In one swift move, he twisted both her hands behind her back, gripping them gently in his one hand. Wrapping the other hand around her shoulders he tugged her closer. Staring in her shocked eyes with full intensity, he announced "If you so much as dared to even think of going away from me ever again then I will kill myself, Khushi" her eyes rounded in horror. "But before that I will find you & kill you & then myself. Hope you got the warning loud & clear Mrs. Khushi Arnav Singh Raizada?" he lifted his eyebrows, challenging her to defy him.
Khushi could just gawk at him for two long minutes before a beautiful smile bloomed on her face.
"That's like my Arnavji" she praised pecking his lips, making him smirk & he left her hands from his grip.
He adjusted himself properly on the floor & pulled her on his lap. She cuddled herself in his warm embrace with her hands wrapped around his neck & her head on his racing heart.
He kissed her forehead. "Always remember this, Khushi that you are not just my family but you are my whole world" he said pulling her closer if possible. As if wanting to hide his world from the entire world.
Khushi looked up in his eyes to witness the love & passion back in them, for her. Their hearts & souls were finally at peace in each others' arms.
"I love you, Arnavji" she whispered, kissing his jawline.
His eyes shone with more passion hearing her confess her love for him, again.
He smashed his lips on her rosy lips, kissing her fervently & this time Khushi too participated in the kiss with equal fervour.
Arnav's hands were deftly caressing her body wherever they could manage to reach arousing desires in her. Khushi moaned in his mouth & their kiss intensified.
Need of breath forced them to part their lips. Both were breathing heavily. Her eyes were closed. Her soft bosoms were brushing his chest through the openings of his shirt. The flashes of their consummation a few hours back in his farmhouse swarm through his eyes, arousing every single fibre to claim her again. He trailed his hot tongue on the outline of her thoroughly smooched lips & she slowly opened her eyes. Seeing the naked passion in his chocolate pools she gripped his hair in tight fists as she could feel a heavy rush of adrenaline in her own body, too.
"I love you, too, Khushi. I love you so damn much" he whispered against her warm lips. "Gosh!! I want to make love to you again, Khushi. Right here. Right now" he confessed unabashedly, smooching the top swells of her breasts.
He doesn't need to announce that as she can already feel his bodily changes.
Khushi bit her lower lip making him groan.
"Then do it, Arnavji" she replied, rubbing her thumb on his lips.
Arnav was stumped at her direct demand.
He gripped her wrist. "Khushi, don't provoke me. I mean what I said" he warned, biting her cheek, lightly. "I want you so badly, but....
"Even I mean it, Arnavji" she interrupted. "Make love to me. Make me yours again, Arnavji" she swiped her pink tongue on her lips, tempting him more.
he stared in her eyes finding traces of mischief but found none. She was damn serious.
"Let us just drown in our love & wipe out the painful past few hours from our special day, Arnavji" she insisted with desire filled eyes.
"Khushi.. You.. You must be sore from.." she clasped her hand on his mouth. "I'm absolutely fine Arnavji & my body is more than willing to be loved by you again" she assured him.
"Are you sure?" he asked, moving her hand from his mouth.
"Very much" she replied, hugging him, nibbling his earlobe. "But not here on the floor. My back would hurt" she pouted, looking at him, making him smile wide & heart flutter at her cuteness.
He kissed her pout. "Then let's take this to bed" he stood up carrying her carefully in his protective arms. He pecked her forehead & she closed her eyes savouring the warmth.
He was sure that his dadi & Shyam were planning something to ruin his & Khushi's marriage. But they don't know that tomorrow they will not only face Arnav Singh Raizada's wrath but they will have to face Khushi's Arnavji, too, who will fight against them tooth & nail to protect his love, his Khushi from every bad eye that dares to ruin their togetherness. But everything at it's right time. Right now Khushi doesn't need to know any of it.
She has already had her share of battles against life, 'mostly against you,' his conscience pricked.
'yeah... yeah... agreed,' for the first time his heart relented without any argument on any matter related to Khushi.
This time he will fight for her & their love.
With that strong determination, he carried his life in his arms to make passionate love to her until she forgets everything but him & he remembers nothing except her.
The end.
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