EPILOGUE

     ADALINE'S DEAD BODY WAS ALL ARVIN COULD SEE. Her blood still stained his skin and clothes, her crying, smiling face interfered with his vision. She was all he could see.

     It wasn't supposed to happen like this. They were supposed to run away together, start a family, raise them the way Adaline and Arvin wished they were raised.

     Adaline once suggested going to her grandparents' ranch. She didn't know if anyone had bought it yet after their passing, but maybe if they saved up enough money, they could buy it and raise their kids there. She'd teach them to ride horses like her mother taught her once upon a time.

     They would be a real family.

     They would have been a real family.

     As narrow-minded as it sounded, Arvin couldn't imagine spending his life with anyone else besides Adaline. His grandmother would tell him otherwise, convince him to pray on it and that his adolescent mind is shielding him from all of the other possibilities because he's grieving. While he'd never say it to Emma's face, he disagrees.

     Adaline was the one person who accepted him despite all of his faults. She stood by him through all of it. Sure, Arvin could always make up a new identity, or simply never tell of his past demons to a potential new lover, but it wouldn't be the same. Adaline was his person...

     ...and now she's dead.

     Everyone Arvin loves seems to choose death. Was it him? Was God punishing him for being a nonbeliever? First, his mom, then dad, Lenora, and now Adaline. If so, then this God wasn't the all-forgiving one Adaline told him about. One time in her room, Arvin read the underlined verse in the open Bible on her bedside table:

     Romans 5:8, "I loved you at your darkest."

     Adaline said that God loved everyone, no matter what they've one, no matter what they believed in.

     Look where that got her.

     Arvin may have somewhat believed her then, but that was before God took her from him. God was not the omnibenevolent being Adaline made Him out to be, He was just. He would determine the sinners from the saints, He would give them their deserved ending.

     Arvin was a killer, a sin punishable with an eternal life of misery in Hell. Was this his Hell? Being stuck on Earth while everyone he loved moved on to somewhere better?

     Maybe he'd find someone he could lie to for the rest of his life. It wouldn't matter, anyway. Adaline would always be the only woman on his mind, his greatest "what if?"

     What if she didn't die?

     Maybe he'd enlist like his father did. Maybe while in Vietnam he'd end up joining those he missed so. He'd finally achieve a sense of peace. No more looking over his shoulder, no more fighting or screaming or pain.

     As he fought off sleep next to the stranger who had picked him up in, he could've sworn he could hear Adaline's voice speaking to him.

     It's okay now.

     His reflection in the windshield was replaced with her face, smiling at him.

     She reassured him, you can rest now.

     A tear rolled down his cheek when he finally closed his eyes, lips beginning to tremble.

     Arvin felt Adaline's hand resting on his cheek, I'll always be right here.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we're at the end!!!! thank you so so much for reading & comments & votes, all of your support honestly means the world to me 🥺🥺 gonna be honest this book kinda went 📉 but,,,, we're not gonna talk abt that whoops. i really loved adaline's plot line & as much as i love her, i knew from the beginning that i wanted her to die after finally finding out all of her families' secrets. the actual ending of tdatt is also super ambiguous so i kept it that way here too!! it's up to you to think of what arvin would do, i honestly don't know & keep going back and forth on what i think.

my goal was to finish this before cherry released (on apple tv + lol) & while im actually publishing this on the day it did release,,, i still call that a win & am super proud of myself ESPECIALLY since ive been in a complete writing slump for months.

ANYWAY thank you again for all of your support on prayers for the wicked, it makes my heart so full & i love all of you 💕💞💓💗💖💘💝