Incorrect quotes again

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Potato : It is 6:09 .
Potato : I am wondering why I'm still alive.
Potato : Send Wendy's.
Will: The whole restaurant?!

Potato : You can do it Will!
Potato : But if you can't, at least your death will be quick, painless, and really cool to watch.

Potato around 4'9: Help! I'm drowning!
Will, around 5': Calm down. We're only in six feet of water!
Potato : NOT ALL OF US ARE TALL!

Potato: Fight me!
Will, standing behind them and holding a knife: *mouths* Do not.

Potato: I called you like ten times! Why didn't you pick up?
Will: *remembers dancing to the ringtone*
Will: I didn't hear it.

Will: Fellas, I gotta know for science. Is the opposite of red green or blue?
Potato: Technically a mix of green and blue?
Will: So blurple.
Potato: That's implying you're mixing blue and purple.
Will: Would you rather have fucking bleen? oR MOTHERFUCKING GRUE?
Potato: You were confusing before but now I'm scared.

Potato: *standing on a balcony and sneezes*
Will: *standing on the roof* Bless you.
Potato: God?!

Potato: You have any sunscreen?
Will: You can't get a sunburn from a bonfire—
Potato: It's for my marshmallow ya dummy.

Potato: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?
Will: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

Potato: So, what are we doing?
Will: Wasting our lives.
Potato: I meant for lunch...

Potato: But that place is haunted.
Will: Ghosts prey on fear. Just be confident!
Potato, marching into the haunted house I AM NOT SCARED! I AM NOT A PUSSY!

Will: I'm tired.
Potato: You slept for three hours last night! Why are you surprised?!
Will: I'm not surprised. I just wanted to complain about it.

Potato: What's your favorite color?
Will: Stop asking stupid questions. Ask me something logical and mature.
Potato: How many moles of sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8ml of sulfuric acid at STP?
Will: My favorite color is red.

Will: Oh, they left the bowl out?
Will: It says, "Take two pieces of candy."
Potato: Nobody around though...
*Potato grabs the entire bowl and runs off with it*
Will: NO—
*later*
Will, eating chocolate: that was a good idea.

Potato: What is the most illegal thing you can do with one gold?
Will: Exchange it for a hundred copper, put them all in a sock, and then beat someone to death with it.

Will: Do you care if I take the skin off this Furby?
Will: I want to make him a god. Once he is free of his sinful flesh, he can begin a path towards enlightenment. He will take care of us.
Will: I also want to softhack his circuits.
Potato: I literally could not care less but never say anything as frightening as that ever again.

Potato: Good morning. As you begin your day, remember that violence is always an option and often the answer.
Will:
Potato:
*at the same time*
Will: ...Please, go back to bed.
Potato: I'll go back to bed.

Potato: Can I bother you for a second?
Will: You're always bothering me, but go ahead.

Potato: Hey guys, what are your favorite kinds of pudding?
Will: Pudding deez nuts in your mouth? Is that what you were about to say? Do you gain joy from tricking your innocent cohorts? What if I actually wanted to tell you about my favorite pudding?

Will: Why shouldn't you put a toaster in a bathtub full of water?
Potato: Because your toast would get soggy!
Will: No, you'll die..

Will: *trying to get five seconds of sleep*
Potato, poking Will's arm: Will Will. Will. Will.
Will: WHAT?
Potato: ...We're out of Capri Suns—

Will: I'm not mean. Name one mean thing I've ever done.
Potato: When we were younger, you convinced me eggs weren't real.
Will: They're not.
Potato: Haha, very funny.
Will: I'm serious. Didn't you hear?
Potato: No... what happened?
Will: ...Why would you fall for this again-

Potato: Where are you going?
Will: *thinks of all the sins it did*
Will: Hell, eventually.

Will: Would you like your pizza cut into six or eight slices, Potato?
Potato: Oh just six, I don't think I could eat eight.

Potato: When's the last time you slept?
Will: Uh... a few days ago, I think.
Potato: A few- how many?!
Will: Uh... *starts counting on fingers* I need more fingers...
Potato: What you need is sleep!

Potato, T-posing in the doorway:  Greetings, Will.
Will, not looking up from it's tea:Good morning, problem child.

Potato: Will... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?
Will: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.
Potato:
Potato: I wrote sanitize, Will.
Will: it'S NOT MY FAULT I CAN'T READ PROPERLY! :(

Potato: *sighs*
Will: You bored?
Potato: Yeah.
Will: Wanna start drama for no reason?
Potato: I thought you'd never ask.

Potato, drowning: Help!
Will: Don't worry, I heard cowards float.

Will: I don't even use tubberware anymore.
Potato: What are you saying? Say it again.
Will: Tubberware.
Potato: Say it again. Slow.
Will: Tubberware.
Potato: Slow, very slow - actually, say the first syllable.
Will: Tub.
Potato: Wrong.
Will: What do you mean, wrong?
Potato: I thought I caught that. You're saying tub. It's P.
Will: What are you talking about?
Potato: Tupperware. Tupper.
Will: It's tupper!?
Potato: It's tupper, always has been, always will be.
Will, doesn't understand English: I thought it was tubberware because it kind of looks like a tub.

Will: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.
Potato: Those are wanted posters!

Potato: What is your favourite mythical story?
Will: The Story Of My Will To Live.
Potato: I don't think I've heard of that one before.

Potato: Are you having another depressive episode?
Will: A depressive episode?
Will: I'm having a depressive series and we're just on season one.

Will: If I die first, promise to wait up for me, okay, Potato?
Potato: Oh, Will. When I die, I'm taking you with me.
Will: I can't tell if that's a threat or a compliment.
Potato: I'd think of it more as a grim inevitability.

Potato: And then they ran into my knife. They ran into my knife ten times.
Will: You mean you stabbed them?
Potato: They ran into my knife.

Potato: Are you mad?
Will: No.
Potato: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?
Will: nope.
Potato: what is it for-
Will: me.

*Potato is cleaning the house and they find an empty bottle of orange juice*
Potato: Clear orange juice?
Potato: Oh, it's empty.
Will, who has been watching the entire time: I live with an idiot. I live with an idiot. I live with an idiot.

Will: You've got to learn to love yourself.
Potato: But don't you hate yourself.
Will: Yeah, but this is about you. Stay focused.