CHAPTER 6

REAM SIPPED his wine while standing at the terrace of his mother and her new husband's small vacation house in Hammerfest, Norway. The terrace was overlooking the harbor and half of the island, presenting him the beautiful sunset at—Ream looked at his watch. Eleven PM, close to twelve—midnight.

Yes. He was looking at the sun, at midnight.

Well, this was summer in Hammerfest, Norway. Famous for its midnight sun.

"Son." Sinamahan siya ng ina sa terasa saka naglalambing na yumakap ito sa braso niya. "You're alone and looking lonely again. You have been like this since you arrived few months ago. I didn't ask because I want to give you space, but I'm getting worried, Ream. What's happening with you? Care to tell Mom?"

Ream smiled because he knew how much his mother endured just to give him the space he needed. "I don't think it's working, Ma."

"Working, what?"

Ream stared at the midnight sun. "Honestly, I came here to move on."

"Oh." That piqued Rowena's interest. "Why is it not working?"

"Because I'm far away from her, but she's still on my mind." Ream sighed and sipped his wine again. "I want to go home and see her, but I think it'll be better for the two of us to not meet again." Seeking advice from his mother, he told her what Syl told him the last time they met at his store. "I need help, Ma. What do I do? This is my first time feeling this way. I don't know what to do with these feelings, at the same time, I don't want to be reckless and hurt her."

Rowena sighed at his son's bothered expression. "Maybe I'm biased because you're my son, but based on what she said to you, she likes you."

"But she said she's not in a good place and she doesn't want to drag me into her mess. And I have to respect that."

"And that's what's worrying you." Rowena knew her son better than anyone. She could tell what was bothering him the moment he told her about the woman he liked. "You know, son..." Rowena turned her son's body to face her, and she cupped his face. "You have always been nice, kind, and respectful. They're good traits, really, but that attitude of yours sometimes gets excessive. You knew that she was not in a good place, but you let her be because you respected her decision, yes?"

Ream nodded. "She was in pain, and I don't want to add to her burden."

"But didn't it occur to you that maybe, contrary to what she told you, she actually wanted to leave that place?"

Ream was lost for words. "...What?"

Rowena sighed, seeing the lost expression on her son's face. "You don't have to tell me the details, but I can guess that she's in a bad situation right now. Because what she told you, the 'I don't want to drag you to my mess' were the same words I told my third ex-husband when my second ex-husband was abusing me. I was so scared that he would hurt Theo, so I pushed Theo away. But deep inside, I wanted Theo to just grab me and pull me out of my misery, which Theo did." Rowena smiled at the memory. "That's why I divorced him when things started to change between us. Theo was the sweetest man I have ever met, and I don't want to hurt him. And it was a good decision, hence my friendship with Theo even after our divorce."

Ream finished his wine and looked at his mom. "Do you really think she needs me?"

Rowena shrugged; she didn't want to give her son too much hope. "I'm not sure, but you should go home and try talking to her again. Give it three tries with double the effort, and if she still rejects you, then maybe, it is better to let her go."

"Why three times?"

"Why not?" Rowena smiled at her son. "Third time's a charm."

Mahinang natawa si Ream sa sagot ng ina saka masuyo itong niyakap. "Thanks, Ma. I needed that."

"You're welcome." Rowena pinched Ream's cheek. "Now off you go and chase your woman. If she breaks your heart again, feel free to visit. You're always welcome."

Ream smiled affectionately at his mother before he placed a kiss on her forehead. "Thank you, Ma. I love you."

"And I love you too." Rowena felt so warmed that her eldest son was still so sweet even at his age. "And tell your little brother to visit me. He owes me dinner."

Ream chuckled before nodding. "I will, Ma. But before that..." Inakbayan ni Ream and ina saka sabay ang dalawa na humarap sa karagatan. "Let's enjoy the midnight sun first."

Rowena smiled and leaned her head on her son's shoulder. She was happy that her son never changed, still sweet and respectful towards her even after she left him with his father years ago to pursue her dream. She just hoped that this woman that her son adored was worth the effort.

LEAVING HAMMERFEST via private plane that Ream's mother rented for him, it landed on Tromso, Norway, and from Tromso, he traveled via commercial plane to Oslo, Norway. Waiting for his connecting flight from Oslo to Istanbul, Ream was in the airport's lounge sipping coffee and reading a book. When he got bored, he connected his phone to the airport's wi-fi and sent a chat to BIG DECKS group chat.

What a disturbing group chat name, Ream thought before he sent a message. I wonder who changed it this time.

REAM OLIVEROS: My connecting flight is taking too long. I'm bored.

Thorn answered his chat with a photo of him, Knight, Shun, Lysander, Calyx, Pierce, Khairro and the very bored Valerian.

THORN CALDERON: We're already in Istanbul waiting for you, bud. I want to say take your time, but Volkzki is about to bite our heads off. Kanina pa niya kami minumura, masakit na sa tainga. Kung hindi lang siya ang piloto, tinapon na namin 'to.

IUHENCE VERGARA: How mean could you be, you bastards?! Bakit hindi n'yo ako sinama?!

TYRON ZAPANTA: @IuhenceVergara maybe because we have a business meeting, and you need to attend? At saka wala ka namang maitutulong sa kanila. Hindi ka naman piloto at hindi mo kayang ilipad ang eroplano. Nasisiguro kong makiki-tsismis ka lang doon kaya dapat lang na iniwan ka.

IUHENCE VERGARA: 😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔

KNIGHT VELASQUEZ: Wawa ka naman @IuhenceVergara, ang dami na naming tsismis na nalakap.

KUTONGEROsiSHUN: @KnightVelazquez it's nakalap, hindi nalakap.

IUHENCE VERGARA: Holy shit! I thought it's nalakap! @KnightVelasquez how dare you gave me a wrong translation for gathering!!! I've been dupe!

KNIGHT VELASQUEZ: You asked, I answered 🤷🏻

IUHENCE VERGARA: You need to avenge me @KUTONGEROsiSHUN!

KUTONGEROsiSHUN: Who the fuck change my name again?! 🔪 I will murder you!

LYSANDER CALLAHAN: Huwag kayong maingay. Kumakain kami. Nakaka-isturbo ang notification sound sa pagsubo ko ng kanin.

CALYX VARGAZ: Huwag n'yo kasing isturbuhin si Callahan. Nagbaon pa 'yan ng garlic fried rice galing Pinas. LOL.

KHAIRRO SANFORD: So that's why I've been smelling garlic fried rice!

PIERCE MULLER: ...

KHAIRRO SANFORD: Even here, Muller is silent.

Napailing na lang si Ream sa usapan sa group chat. Akmang babalik na lang sana siya sa pagbabasa nang makatanggap siya ng personal chat mula kay Shun.

'Bud, it's good that you're going home.'

And below Shun's message was a photo of Syl exiting a clinic with bruises on her neck and wrists. And based on the timestamp, the photo was taken just a week ago. Unconsciously, Ream gripped his phone tightly as his chest ached and regret came flooding in.

I shouldn't have left, Ream thought as regret started eating at him. I shouldn't have listened to her!

'I know you're all about respecting someone's decision and all, but bud, you have to move or the woman you like will die in misery.'

With his shaking hands in anger, he replied. 'I will.'

'Good. She has tons of secrets, and she won't tell you much. And since you're adamant on respecting her privacy, then I will step back and you have to figure out her secrets yourself. Good luck, bud! It's a nasty and rough ride for you. But if you think she's worth it, then go get her.'

Worried and anxious, Ream couldn't help it anymore. Pulling out Syl's number from his contacts, he called her. When Syl didn't answer, he called again. And at his third try, she finally answered.

"Syl—"

"Ream...?" Syl sounded hesitant, like she was not sure that it was him.

"Yes, Syl. It's me." Ream chuckled humorlessly. "You...didn't save my number?"

"I did, but I deleted a while back." Syl's voice was so vulnerable that all Ream wanted to do was to gather her in his arms and hug her tight. "Why did you call? Is it because of the earrings?"

Ream frowned. "What earrings?"

"The one that my mom ordered?"

At the mention of Syl's mom, Ream's expression darkened. "No. It's not about that. I just...I just want to ask if you're doing okay. I mean, really, really okay?"

Syl, on the other line, bit her lip at how genuine Ream sounded. "I'm..." Her eyes looked down at her bruised wrist that she was covering with her long-sleeved dress. "I'm fine, Ream. Thank you for asking."

"Are you really?" Ream didn't believe Syl one bit. "It's me, Syl. You don't have to lie to me."

Syl bit her lower lip harder. "A-ayos lang talaga ako. No need to worry. Hindi na ako pinagbubuhatan ng kamay ni Mommy, so..." Tears fell from her eyes. "I'm good." Syl tried her best for her voice not to quiver. "I'm really good, Ream."

Ream took a deep breath to calm himself because he could hear a small quiver in Syl's voice. She was lying. "You know I respect your decision, right?"

Syl dried her tears as a frown made its way to her eyebrows. "Yes. I know."

"Then will you hate me if I drag you out of that place you're in?" Ream let out a loud sigh as if his emotion was becoming too much to bear. "I know you're not fine. I know you're lying to me right now."

"Ream—"

"I went to Norway after out little talk in my store. I was hoping I'd forget you there. But...it's not working for me, Syl. I don't know why, but I really want to see you so bad. So, I'm coming back and the first thing I'll do is to go see you."

"Ream, no—"

"Please don't reject me." Ream rubbed his palm over his face to control his emotion from bursting out. "I don't know what's happening to me anymore, Syl. All I know is that I want you really, really bad. Pursuing you like this is against my principles, but I have to do something before I go crazy worrying over you and thinking about you."

Panay ang tuyo ni Syl sa luha niya na ayaw tumigil sa pagdaloy. Gustong sabihin ni Syl kay Ream na hindi sila puwede kasi may asawa na siya pero ayaw niyon lumabas sa bibig niya. Hindi niya alam kung bakit nahihirapan siyang magpakatotoo kay Ream. Nahihirapan siyang aminin dito na hindi na siya malaya.

Siguro dahil makasarili siya. Masaya siya na gusto siya ni Ream at ayaw niyang mawala 'yon.

Ream was a good man. If he found out that she was already married when they shared an intimate night in Bali, the guilt and anger that would consume him...Syl didn't want that for Ream. She wanted to avoid that.

"Ayaw mo ba talaga sa 'kin, Syl?" tanong ni Ream sa walang buhay na boses. "Wala ba talaga akong pag-asa? Magagalit ka ba sa 'kin kapag pinapatuloy ko 'tong pangungulit sa 'yo? Can't you tell me the truth, Syl?"

Hearing Ream's voice, like he had given up, Syl wanted to give in and just run to him and be with him, but a part of her didn't want to drag Ream into her hellish life. Kapag nalaman ng mga magulang niya ang tungkol kay Ream, baka perahan din ng mga ito ang binata gamit siya at nasisiguro siyang gano'n ang mangyayari.

"Syl?"

Huminga nang malalim si Syl saka mahinang pinagsusuntok ang dibdib kung nasaan ang puso niya. "Natatakot ako, Ream. Natatakot ako na magpakatotoo kasi wala namang patutunguhan 'yon. Magkakasakitan lang tayo. I don't want that."

"If you don't want that, it's okay, Syl." Ream's voice softened and Syl felt warm and safe all over. "If you're scared to like me back for personal reasons, that's okay with me. I don't mind. Just don't be scared to accept my help. Syl, inuulit ko, hindi mo kailangang suklian ang nararamdaman ko para sa 'yo para tanggapin ang tulong ko. If you can't accept my feelings, at least accept my help. Masaya na ako do'n. I just want you safe and unharmed and happy. So...will you meet me and hear me out?"

Syl bit her lower lip hard. "I don't—"

"Think about it before you give me an answer," mabilis na putol ni Ream sa sagot sana ni Syl. "Please, think about it. Really hard."

Syl knew she should say no that very moment, but the word 'okay' came out of her lips.

And that single word made Ream smile. "Thank you, Syl."

Why are you thanking me? I didn't do anything worth thanking for. Syl wanted to ask that, but Ream already bade goodbye, saying it was time for his flight.

When the call ended, Syl looked at the screen of her phone. Alam niyang wala siyang dapat pag-isipan—hindi niya dapat pag-isipan ang ino-offer sa kaniya ni Ream dahil kilala niya ang sarili niya. Magkakaroon at magkakaroon sila ng relasyon ni Ream kapag hinayaan niya itong magpatuloy. Kahit ngayon pa lang, sa isiping makikita niya ulit ang unang lalaki sa buhay niya na niri-respeto lahat ng sagot at sinasabi niya, parang nagkakaroon ng kulay ang mundo niya, ano pa kapag kaharap niya 'to?

The strength she had to muster not to be tempted when she spoke with him in his store...Syl didn't know if she could muster the same strength if she saw him again.

But if it was up to her, if her parents weren't involved and if she disregarded the little morals left in her, she would run to Ream in a heartbeat. Because that was what she wanted. And for the first time in her life, she selfishly wanted something for herself.

Ream. She wanted Ream.

CECELIB | C.C.