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For some reason I expected it to be easier if we got this far. Despite her saying to me yesterday that this was the last time as she ushered me out of the door before Casey was due to show up, here I was, standing at her doorstep after another phone call from her this morning.

Call me stupid for chasing her, but maybe I liked the excitement, tied with her beauty and charm.

I knew it would be a complicated relationship. I mean, kids being involved when I'm barely twenty?

I really tried, too, to give up on her when she first told me about her pregnancy.

But then I saw her face again. And I saw her smile. And I saw the little crease that worries between her brows when she's focussed or concerned about something.

And then I knew I wanted her all over again.

When Lily accepted my friend request on Facebook over a month ago, I was over the moon to have access to her life finally. Scrolling through the pictures of her with him surely took a toll on my heart. But the ones of just her... or the videos she shared had me more drawn to her.

She wasn't my type. I enjoyed the party-goers and the often cake-faced bleach-haired girls who were always keen for something fun.

I mean, I don't think any woman pregnant to some other guy's kid can be any person's type... But hey, who am I to judge?

But Lily was the type of girl you grow old with. Who you take home to meet your parents. Whose finger you put a ring on. Who I'd want to wake up to every day.

And she liked me back.

So as long as she kept asking me to return to her, no matter if each time it ended with her telling me she can't see me again, I was going to come back. Because she was a magnet to me. And I'd do anything to have her be just mine.

"Lily?" I called out as I pushed her front door open.

"I'm in here," a defeated voice echoed from her spare room.

After walking through the house, following the small noises clattered from inside, I shoved the already ajar door open and looked down at her.

Belly seeming even bigger (even though I had seen her yesterday), her curly brown locks had been mishappenly tied into a bun atop her head. Most people would think in that moment she looked a wreck, with her daggy clothes and unkempt appearance. But I think it just made her all the more adorable.

"They're just going to have to sleep on the floor," she sighed as she dropped the wooden pieces in her hands, then burying her face in her palms.

"Where's the instructions?" I replied. "I'll put them together for you."

Eyes peeking between her fingers, she mumbled, "You don't have to do that. I'll get Cory to—"

"No. I'm here. I'm capable. I can do for you whatever Cory can."

She heaved a sigh and dropped her hands back to her lap, tiredly meeting my gaze. I could tell from the look in her eyes that she wanted to tell me we would never work and I should just go enjoy being young. But before she could even utter a syllable, I leaned over and planted a kiss on her nose.

A brilliant grin spread across her flushed cheeks as she averted her gaze, evidently now distracted from her thoughts.

"Go have a shower and get yourself from lunch," I said to her.

"I feel bad that—"

"Lily. Please just help me out here. I'm trying to work hard at putting this together, but your beautiful self is just too distracting." I threw in a smirk at the end for good measure.

With a roll of her eyes, she propped herself to her feet—with a little bit of struggle thanks to the stomach.

Hand trailing over my shoulder on her way out, she did as I had asked and left the room, the shower echoing in the distance not too long later.

About forty-five minutes later, the door behind me creaked open. But I was too focussed on screwing in the railing of the current crib I was working on to look at her.

To my heart's delight, her small hand pressed to my back as she leaned over to inspect my work. Head only a few breaths away, I paused what I was doing to steal a glance.

Her hair was still damp from her shower. The smell of her strawberry shampoo wafting over me. Her skin silky clean and grey eyes glowing into mine.

"You look more energised," I breathed, holding back from the plethora of actual comments I wanted to throw her way... because maybe she'd get freaked out if I told her she smelled delightful. Or offended that I thought she needed a wash in the first place.

But then she smiled back at me in response, casting away all my worries as her eyes crinkled in delight before she looked back to my work. "I can't believe you built one already and are almost finished the second."

"I know, right?" I teased. "You think considering you're three people right now, you'd get this done in no time."

Deadpanning, she gripped onto my shoulder as she helped herself to the ground next to me. I momentarily abandoned my work to support her on the way down. "Pregnant lady incoming," she whispered under her breath before letting out a small oomph from her mouth as she collided with the floor. "I wish that got easier."

"They're only going to get bigger from here. Sorry to destroy that wish."

"Here I thought I was birthing Benjamin Button."

Another shared smile, I turned back to the crib and put the last pieces together.

"Thanks, Tyler... for coming on such short notice," she whispered. "I didn't want to call him and make him see me when he doesn't want to."

Heart twinging slightly, I wanted to say 'why can't you just admit you wanted to see me more than him', but I held it back. "Anything for you, Lily," is what I said instead.

Hand sitting on my knee, she gave it a squeeze, then leaned back on her arms to admire my handiwork. "I could use a lightbulb being changed and a picture being hung too," she said jokingly.

"I can do that," I replied earnestly.

Waving her hand, she shook her head. "It's not urgent."

I got to my feet. "Show me the light bulb!"

"Higher," she said. "No a little higher. A little higher than that. Okay, to the right. Yup. That's it."

There was something a little off to the tone of her voice as she spoke, but not wanting to mess up the location, I kept my eyes focussed on the hammer and nail as I hung the artwork for her.

Finally lowering my arms, I turned around to find her leaning over the kitchen counter, eyes focussed a little too low to be on the task I was doing.

Cheeks tinging red, she looked up at me and away from where my butt would have been. "Would you like me to make you some food?"

Feeling an ounce of confidence overcome me from catching her checking me out, I took measured steps across the room towards her as I said in a low voice, "No thank you. But there is something else I'd like."

"Is there?" she whispered back, voice a little wavering though she tried to be seductive. I liked when she tried to be alluring but her lack of confidence in herself messed it up. It made her all the more cuter.

I was in front of her now, her gaze flickering between my eyes and mouth. I tucked a lock of her hair, now finally dry, behind her ear, before letting my own gaze trail down to her lips. "I'm very hungry for it," I said.

"How hungry?"

"Famished."

"Perhaps you should... fix that."

She didn't have to say more. I leaned down and pressed my lips forcefully onto hers. A low groan emitted from her throat as she wrapped her arms around me, belly pressing up against my chest as her tongue dug its way into my mouth.

Arms wrapping around her, I hoisted her onto the kitchen counter. She locked her legs around me in response, keeping me steady as our hands raided over each other's bodies. As our lips came apart and back together. As we tilted our heads this way and that, trying so desperately to get closer.

But then, as I pulled back to turn my head the other way, she whispered against my lips, "I want you so bad."

Pausing, I opened my eyes and looked up at her. Eyes swirling with confusion momentarily, she went to lean back in for another kiss, but my hands moved to her shoulders, gripping her steady. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean..." she whispered, eyes trailing over me before meeting mine again. "I mean this." I let her mouth hungrily kiss mine once more, until her hands trailed over my back, grabbing the back of my shirt and starting to lift it upwards.

I could feel a tightness swell in my pants as I realised what she had been alluding to.

And as I allowed her to take my shirt off and leaned into the new territory we were creeping into, my hands began to roam her body more adventurously, slipping down to squeeze her butt. Coming to the front to caress over her breast. But as I moved my hands lower, wanting to remove the layers she had between us, my hand grazed over her stomach only to feel a thud against my hand.

Immediately, I stumbled backwards, away from her.

Hair disheveled, lips swollen, her eyes poured sadness at me. "Get back here," she breathed.

"Um," I started, eyes flickering between her face and her belly.

After a few times of doing that, her expression fell. "It's finally clicked in, hasn't it?"

"What has?"

"You don't want me anymore."

Closing the distance, I wrapped my arms hesitantly around her, ensuring to keep in the appropriate areas this time. "I do. I want you to be all mine. I want to call you my girlfriend."

"Then why'd you stop?"

"They um..." I glanced down at her belly, her head following me shortly after as her locks tickled my face. "One of them kicked me as I was touching you."

"Oh..." Her hand shot to her belly and she awkwardly shuffled out of my touch and onto the ground. Hand supporting her stomach, she tried to kneel for my shirt. But seeing the struggle, I beat her to it. "You can go if you want."

"I don't want to go," I said.

"But this creeps you out," she said, hand waving over her stomach.

"No. No, no, no." I quickly slipped my shirt back on and wrapped my arms around her. "It does not. And I really want to... I'd love to take things further with you. It's just... you have your meeting with Cory tomorrow. And I suppose them kicking me was a reality check that you're not mine to take just yet."

Bottom lip jutting out, she finally looked up at me, grey eyes oozing with an array of unrecognisable emotions. I was trying to focus on her instead of the thoughts swirling in my head that begged to know whether she was going to still pick him in the end. "So you won't have sex with me until I've firmly ended things with him?"

My heart fluttered momentarily and the desire in my pants stirred slightly at the mention of the word, wanting nothing more than to get caught up in the moment with her again and let what happens happen... But instead, I nodded.

Sighing, she leaned into me, wrapping her arms around me.

"Do you... do you think that's something you'll do?" I found myself voicing, wishing I could retract it again. Scared she would tell me to leave once more and that we can't do this anymore.

"I... I don't know."

"I just don't get it. You're attracted to me. You're into me. All that's holding you to him is that you have a history and you're pregnant with his kids. Why can't you just let him go?"

I had asked this question nearly every day. And I fully expected the usual, 'It's complicated, Ty. I don't expect you to understand'. But then she let out a barely audible, "I'm scared."

"What of?" I asked, resting my head atop of hers.

She shook her head, nuzzling further into my chest.

"You can talk to me, Lily," I prompted, waiting for her to push me away. Waiting for her to just kick me out as per usual.

"Cory and I... have a complicated history."

Here it comes... the 'you can never understand' talk.

But then she said, "Even in high school, I knew we didn't fit together. Which is why I dated... Jake."

Shifting back, I looked at her. She stared at my chest momentarily before her eyes slowly met mine, wary, hesitantly. "Who?"

"He..." Her bottom lip quivered and her hands pulled out of her hold on me, coming to her belly instead as she looked down at it. "He's the reason I lost the first baby."

"From the start, Lily..."

"I dated Jake because he was nice to me. He was steady. Cory was too busy sleeping with all these other girls and I figured we were never going to have that relationship. At best we could be friends... if we could ever stop lunging at each other's throats each time we saw each other. But there was something about Cory that made me really want to be with him back then. Maybe because he was the boy no one tamed. Maybe because I was pregnant with his kid. Maybe it was who he was back then—so alive and full of youth—that drew me to him. Nonetheless, I broke it off with Jake to be with Cory. But because I even gave this guy, Jake, my time of day... because I was pregnant with Cory's kid and making out with some other guy... I lost my baby."

"Lily..." I wrapped my arms back around her, pulling her against me. "It doesn't work like that, you fool."

But then she started to sob. "It does, Ty. He... Jake... he couldn't handle the breakup. And he... He pushed me."

My grip tightened on her. "So... it wasn't a natural miscarriage... it was the result of trauma?"

"Yes," she wailed, hands gripping onto my shirt behind my back.

I held her even more tightly, as though I was the glue keeping her shattered heart together. Until finally she stopped sobbing. Her body stopped convulsing. Her tears stopped wetting my shirt. Then when she seemed to be still, I pulled back and wiped whatever wetness still remained on her cheeks. "I've been clear from the start that I'm not trying to replace Cory as the father. That I know you two will always have a relationship and that's something I have to accept. But I assure you, Lily, picking me will not have you lose the babies. And not picking me, and this being some brief fling we have if that's all it ever is, will not lead to me becoming some deranged idiot who feels the need to get revenge by making you lose those babies. If you really decide you don't want me, I'll leave you alone, Lily. I don't want you to... I want you to pick me because—" But I stopped myself before I said it, realising that might be too much for her in this moment.

Unfortunately, she wouldn't let it slide. "Because?"

Shaking my head, I smiled at her and briefly touched my lips to her forehead. "Some other time, maybe."

"No," she pouted. "If you want me to really consider what my heart wants... what you want... what we have... lay it all out for me to understand. Talking to you is giving me clarity."

Heaving a sigh, my heart began to thud in my chest as I realised I'd have to say it... sooner or later, she had to hear it because it was my truth. After studying her eyes for a long time, her gaze never backing down from her determination to crack into my heart, I finally gushed, "I want you to pick me because I'm in love with you."

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Welp. That happened.

Do we still hate Tyler?

Next chapter out Friday. Thanks for reading you lovely people! x