Lily seemed off these days, but I put it down to the fact we had just booked in for the morphology scan--where they will check for all the internal elements as well as any chromosomal anomalies, due at the 18 week mark.

I still hadn't found a chance to talk to her and Friday was nearing closer. Tuesday afternoon when I had come home, she was a mess from her mum having visited. She spent most of the evening recapping their conversation and then we watched a movie to take her mind off it all before she fell asleep in my arms on the couch.

Wednesday afternoon she was already asleep in bed when I got home, rousing just before I was getting into bed.

Thursday was my last chance.

John wanted an answer by Friday, so I had to make sure neither of us went to bed until we had the chat.

As I left for work that morning, I scrawled Lily a little note to tell her I had very urgent news we would have to discuss when I got home, so that she must make time for me. I then kissed her head and headed out.

Work was pretty normal. I was doing my best to not let on to Jessica that I had a promotion offer--telling her John only called on me to discuss new rostering arrangements.

And then when the day wrapped up, I packed up my things and headed straight home.

However, when I pulled into the driveway, Lily's car wasn't there.

Sighing, I grabbed my lunch bag and climbed out of the car, heading inside to have a shower while I waited for Lily to get home, figuring she must have gotten lost in her studies.

When I had gotten out and she still wasn't home, I sat down on the couch and scrolled through my phone while I waited. Yet as the light inside began to disappear as the sun set outside, I began to worry.

I exited my game I was playing on my phone, opening up my last message to her and pressed the call button.

The line rang forever, and when I was just about to give up, she finally answered.

"Hey, Cory. Can I call you back later, I'm really busy," she said, a little breathless.

"Where are you?" I asked in response.

"In the library. I have a study project with a peer of mine."

"When are you coming home?"

"Not until late."

"Did you get my note this morning?"

"Note?" She was quiet for a moment then suddenly, "Ah shit! I'm so sorry. Um, I can be there in an hour?"

"Okay," I said in a small voice.

"Talk soon," she said.

"I love you," I replied, but she hung up.

Pursing my lips, I sat the phone on the table, staring at it for a moment. I couldn't shake the fact that something was off about her tone... she was so rushed, which was not normal. And why was she breathless?

Shaking my head, I got off the couch and headed over to the kitchen, starting to assemble our dinner for the evening.

An hour and a half had passed, I had already eaten my dinner and covered hers, placing it in the fridge. I was just about to call her again when finally the front door opened.

"I'm so sorry," she gushed, heading inside and popping her things down. "I lost track of time and the project was bigger than we expected--"

But as she spoke, I had walked over to her, pulling her into my arms and silencing her with a kiss.

When I pulled back, I rested my head on hers, and she smiled up at me. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," I replied, kissing her once more.

But then she pushed away from me. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Sit down on the couch."

Eyebrows raised, she walked over to the living room, taking a seat as instructed.

I opened my bag I had stored the contract in, fishing it out and going back to the living room, placing the envelope on the table as I sat down.

"What's that?" she asked.

I stared at it momentarily, forgetting my speech I had been preparing over the past few days. But then it came back to me. "A full-time contract for an assistant manager position." I hesitantly met her eyes.

She blinked a couple of times, then cocked her head to the side, a little crease forming between her eyebrows as she looked at it. "For you?"

I nodded.

"From your current job?"

I nodded once more.

She went quiet.

After moments passed with her not saying anything, I began to speak. "John, the area manager, called me in Monday morning to ask me if I wanted the position. Steve is leaving and there is a vacancy and they want to offer it to me first before looking elsewhere."

She still didn't speak.

"It's a full-time salary. They will give me two weeks off when the babies are born too, plus I can take holidays..." I bit my lip and ceased my rambles as I watched her pick up the envelope, pulling the contract out and reading it.

I always admired the little pout that graced Lily's face as she concentrated on a task. Her free hand would always fiddle with a lock of her hair as she read. Sometimes she would bite at her cheek. And she was doing the same thing now, which meant she was considering it. Finally, after getting to the final page, she settled it down on the table, heaving a sigh. "I don't know how you'd manage that with uni..." she trailed off, raising an eyebrow at me.

"That's the thing... If I take it, I would probably quit my degree."

"Quit?" she exclaimed. "Why?"

I looked down. "Lily... I don't think uni is for me."

"Don't do that. Don't discredit yourself, Cory. You are smart when you set your mind to things and you can do anything." She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Maybe. But my heart isn't in this. I didn't want to be a teacher. I don't want to study science. I don't know what I want to do. And maybe I will later. Maybe this is a good opportunity for me to get a good salary and work my way up in a career while I think about whether I want to study later and what that may be."

"Cory--"

I cut her off. "I get you like your degree and you've got everything mapped out. But some people just aren't meant for further education. I really like this work. I know I have to get up super early and the cleaning and trolley pushing is exhausting but... the pay is great. It's reliable. And I like that I don't have to think."

"But one day you will get too old to do such a physically demanding job. And what about when we have young kids who demand your attention when you get home? You'll be too tired for them."

"It's not forever. It's a start. Work my way up into the more office side of managerial. It gives me a chance to build my resume and then go to other avenues later..."

She pursed her lips, still thinking.

I looked down at my lap, feeling my eyes begin to sting and my heart drop. The thoughts about how I wasn't good enough for her continued to circulate in my head. Lily wanted a scholar. Someone smart. Someone who could meet her intellect. And if I took this step, I would disappoint her. I knew it. "Are you not even proud of me for getting this offer?" I whispered, feeling dejected that all she had done was try to find ways to discredit the job.

"Oh Cory," she said softly, causing me to look up to meet her gaze. Her brows had turned down as she looked tenderly at me, hand extending over to rest on my knee. "I'm so proud of you. You have only worked there for a little over a year and, of all the stores in town, they saw potential in you? That's amazing. Just... This isn't what we planned."

Feeling anger well up inside me, I took a steady breath, closing my eyes as I tried to hold back a snappy response. "We didn't plan to have children either. Those plans we made when we finished high school did not involve starting a family for a long time. Yet here we are. It just doesn't make sense for both of us to study when we have kids on the way."

"So it's about the money then? For the babies?"

"No, Lily, it's not just the money!" I didn't shout, but it certainly wasn't a steady voice. She flinched back from me as it came out. I took another deep breath and leaned forward, taking her hands in mine. "Before the job offer, I knew my heart wasn't in this whole thing. But I didn't know what I would do if I wasn't studying. I just hoped something would eventually click. But then this offer came up... like the universe was offering me a solution to my problem."

"So when you said you wanted to talk about this... to discuss it... you actually meant you wanted to tell me that you had decided what's best for this family and you're going to do it whether I like it or not."

I dropped her hands and fell back into the couch, rubbing my hands over my face. "That's not what I said. Why are you putting words in my mouth?"

"I'm not doing anything like that!" she snapped. "I'm just saying what you aren't saying. You won't listen to my side and you seem set on taking the job."

My fists clenched against my legs as I spoke. "And you straight out started going on about how I can't take it. That I must keep studying. For crying out loud, Lily, I didn't want to go into uni when school finished. I wanted to take time off to figure out what I wanted, but you decided that for us. And when we were looking for places, I had no say in that either. And then when I was even switching degrees, you told me what I had to switch into. Maybe this job isn't as honourable and high-brow as you want, but it's steady and it will give us an income. I won't ever be a doctor like you."

"Watch your tone with me!"

"Don't become your mother." I regretted the words as they came out of my mouth, but I couldn't take them back. They were out there now.

Her eyes glowed with rage for that one, causing her to get to her feet. "What did you just say to me?"

"You hated your mother in high school for always saying you had to do what she wanted. You're doing this to me right now," I explained.

"And you're not even discussing with me this job! You're just telling me you want to do it!"

I got to my feet. "And you're telling me I must not!"

"Do what you want, Cory," she hissed, and turned away, walking to the bathroom.

My body trembled with anger as I stared at the closed bathroom door. I grabbed my keys, headed out the door, and got into the car, deciding to take off for a while to think.

I drove and drove, replaying our conversation. Why did she have to straight out deny it? Why couldn't she start by saying she was happy for me? Why couldn't she have asked what I wanted to do? Every single thing that came out of her mouth was a shut down of the idea. If she wanted someone smart, why was she even with me?

I pulled over to the side of the road as the wetness came down my face and I took a couple of steady breaths.

Was I overreacting? I hadn't exactly pitched myself from the get go. I hadn't told her I had been unhappy all this time with my studies... Perhaps part of this was on me.

On top of it, I imagine this was out of the blue for her. She has all these pregnancy hormones raging through her and a massive study load... And I just hit her with this and told her I had to make a decision tonight.

We couldn't afford to fight over this. We couldn't be the kids we were in high school when we would stop talking over a minor thing. We couldn't just run away from each other with every fight. We owed it to each other to talk this out.

With my mind set, I put the key back in the ignition and drove home.