there was a silence in the dorm room, and yet though it was awkward, there was something far more soft as well. an energy they couldn't name, but it made this easier.

chenle's face was flaming, alight with scarlet as his eyes rested anywhere but jisung. he kept trying to convince himself that he was only in the company of another man, that he'd seen everything chenle had to offer and that this was perfectly normal. but it didn't quite hold the weight he wanted, because he knew damn well that what he and park jisung had together was not normal. at least, not platonic.

the only sound to break the quiet was the scratching of pencil led against paper. the pinkette's gaze focused on the rough outline he was preparing because it was pretty difficult for him too...just staring at him.

the elder sat on the end of the bed, one leg propped up and crossed over the other while his free one hung down to touch the floor. he rested his hands back on the duvet behind him as jisung had instructed, and this way he was catching the crappy lighting which illuminated his shadows and edges.

"tilt your chin up a bit," the younger hummed softly and finally lowered the sketch pad to take in the finer details of his muse. "don't look so shy, you're making me shy. crack some jokes like i know you want to."

"jokes don't come so easy when you're naked in front of your new, secret friend," the ravenette smiled at last. he did as he was told and assumed a more confident expression, even though he felt anything but. although, now that they'd spoken since he'd undressed...his shoulders loosened. "you know..." chenle murmured and tried not to move too much, "i've always wanted to say 'paint me like one of your french girls'."

jisung nearly dropped his pencil when he looked up, and only a moment passed before he huffed out breathy laughter, falling into light giggles until chenle had to berate him and tell him to stay quiet. "you're so strange," the ebony student gushed through the hand he had clamped over his mouth. "god, it'll be me who gets us caught."

"yes, well," the shorter hummed, "it certainly won't be me. i have my dignity on the line. work away, mr. artist."

jisung saluted with a grin before continuing what he was doing. he too bore pink cheeks, but they weren't quite so flushed as his model's. the two of them went quiet again after that, but this time without the heavy tension.

footsteps edging through the halls always had them flustering and bracing themselves for discovery, but it never came to fruition. an hour in, and they were still good to go.

chenle's neck started to ache dully and his arms were trembling from holding him up. but he had to persevere. the way jisung looked when he focused was far too beautiful to miss and the finished project was sure to be worth it. before he knew it, he started to tilt his head and smile at the talented boy like he knew something nobody else did. perhaps he did see something others missed.

jisung glanced up as usual, but noticed this and tried not to smile so hard. "what?"

"what do you mean 'what?'?"

"you're grinning at me like i just offered you exam answers. what's up?"

"am i?" chenle continued to beam and failed to calm it down. "sorry, is it ruining your picture?"

"not really. i'm just wondering why."

"why..." the elder thought for a moment and considered an appropriate answer. "not sure."

"psh," the artist scoffed and got back to what he'd started. as he drew, he kept pointedly looking at the other more regularly, "you are an enigma, sometimes. at first, i thought you were so easy to read, and that you'd get us caught in a heartbeat. but now..." he shook his head with a small smile of his own, "now i don't even know."

"do you like me better?" chenle enquired without a thought, and instantly cringed at how eager and juvenile it sounded. "um, since then, i mean. do you think i'm better than when you first met me?"

"i do," jisung nodded. "and you? am i any easier to get along with?"

"much. you were way more obvious about not liking me, but i suppose hanging out has put your suspicions to rest. i think we make a pretty good team." his eyes glistened as he ran through a plethora of memories in a single moment. "i...i can't believe this is over."

"just about," the taller mumbled and brought his pencil back. he breathed out lengthily and simply stared at him for a few seconds too long. "aside from renjun, you're the nicest person i've ever met. i'm...i suppose i'm sorry for misjudging you so soon. and if we go separate ways, i won't fight you or anything, y'know? in battles and whatnot..."

"'if'," chenle repeated. "is there a chance we won't?"

"depends," jisung muttered before standing and rolling out his neck and shoulders. "i don't want to be reckless. renjun seems so stressed all the time just to keep up with loving someone in the other class. doesn't that sound shit to you?"

love? the ravenette blinked, looking down at his bare legs and clutching the sheets a little tighter. he knew the younger boy didn't mean it that way, and that it would be relatively similar if they were just close friends...but still. he wouldn't have minded sneaking around if it was for jisung. "i don't know."

"hm?"

"it doesn't sound so bad to me," he looked up again. eyes meeting eyes. "f-for me, it would be worth it. um, s-staying in contact with you, and everything. but that's just me, and-and i would totally understand if you didn't want to. it's a lot of work, and i'm not exactly experienced in wars and hating and—"

"chenle," jisung suddenly spoke up firmly and stepped over with one long stride to place his hands on the boy's warm, pale shoulders, "relax. i only asked because you have a lot more on your plate than i do. this could sabotage your whole school life, you do realise."

"i know," he bit his lip anxiously, "i know that. but still..."

they both went quiet yet again when the close proximity started to become apparent and their breaths nearly met. jisung accidentally looked down when breaking eye contact and saw pretty legs, sharp hips, and everything else. his breath hitched and he stepped back quickly to see shoot his gaze to the door. "i'm sorry—"

"it's fine."

"le..."

"it's fine, isn't it? how's the, uh," the elder swallowed thickly, "how's the picture? is it done?" he self-consciously pulled his legs up to cross them and rest his clasped hands between them.

"it is, i think. more or less." jisung picked it up and turned it around to show him. "i can finish it from memory later on, when we're not in danger of being caught." they both went an even deeper pink at the concept of him reliving this memory. but nonetheless, chenle couldn't help but flicker his gaze over the page.

it was the spitting image of him, as he expected. completely monochrome with dark shadows and gentle smears he knew jisung would later erase where his hand rubbed the led. his own face looked back out at him as though he was trapped, forever in that comfortable yet deceptively casual stance.

the gentle gradient of greys rising and lowering over his ribs caught his eyes, and he followed down slowly towards his crossed leg where it covered his private area. a little breath of relief ran from him when he saw it, glad that he was spared that embarrassment.

"you're too young, i think, to be drawn naked," jisung pursed his lips bashfully. "and i didn't want to, either."

"thank you."

"no, thank you for modelling. i was in a tight situation, and you saved my ass. this grade means a lot more to me than i let on, but you never gave up when i offered. so...thank you."

the elder pressed his palms together and pushed his index fingers to his lips, still admiring the artwork. his flat stomach and shining shoulders catching the light. his raven hair was striped with greys and white where it hung over his eyes. truly incredible. "i love it."

"nice. i wouldn't have submitted it if you didn't."

"ji," he huffed, but they didn't argue on it. it was wonderful that everything had gone according to plan. as the artist placed the notepad down on his bed, chenle stood gracefully and tried to keep up the nonchalance he'd been feigning. his feet dropped quietly over the carpet as he edged his way over, and no sooner had he reached him, the pinkette turned around to face him.

"hi," jisung whispered in surprise, blinking at how close he'd gotten.

"hi," the dark-haired teen smiled. they stood inched apart, with a tiny height difference amounting to nothing. their noses were close and their eyes were begging each other for this night not to end. but it had to, and they were running out of time. "listen, i think i should tell you something—"

but he never got the chance. clearly impulsively, the ebony student hurriedly leaned in and connected their lips, probably terrified and definitely not sure what he was thinking. his hand came up to hover near chenle's face, but he didn't dare touch it. instead, the older did so for him. he laced their fingers together and pressed them to his cheek as he too embraced the feeling.

the searing heat off their skin seemed to amplify the raging sounds of their pulses in their ears, and red fled across their cheeks, their noses and towards their necks. they'd never done this before, but it was reassuring that it was their first together.

all too soon, and without coming to terms with it, they chenle and jisung were forced to separate when two sharp knocks tapped on the door.

"i'm coming in, ji," renjun voice warned gently as it was already eleven in the evening.

"shit," the pinkette hissed.