"It's just here." I said to Billie pausing with walking as I sat down on the grass and looked back up at him.

He looked over at the waterfall besides the grass I was sat on. He looked amazed, over at the falling water in awe.

I had been coming to this spot for years. I liked the sound of the water. How this place wasn't ever quiet. I hated silence. So I loved this place.

"This is so cool." he mumbled under his breath taking a step closer to the water in fascination. He looked back over at me. "Why would you take me here?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, doesn't this place like- mean something to you?"

"Of course it does. Don't your spots mean something to you?"

"Well, course but-"

"-and you showed me your spots? I thought it would be a nice difference y'know? It's a nice place. You like it then?"

As I was talking he turned back to looking at the water, he nodded. "Definitely,"

"So changing subjects... How do you feel about this Eden and Tre thing that's going on?" I asked him whilst he made his way over to where I was sitting, and sat down in front of me pulling an unsure face.

"How I feel? Honestly?"

"Yeah, truthfully,"

"I hate it,"

"You do?"

"Why does Tre all of a sudden have this huge crush on Eden? I can't- I can't tell if Eden's doing this to piss me off because she was angry with this situation- but- I mean- either way! That's my sister and best friend. That's weird- it's against the rules!"

"What rules Billie?"

"Friendship rules!? Siblings off limits!"

"Alright alright- can I ask another question?" I asked again cutting him short from another rant about the same thing.

"Uh... sure? Yeah,"

"Y'know... the other day when you was drunk. And you said 'I lied. I felt it,' I just- I remembered that night and everything I said. I just wanna know if you meant that. If you said it out of drunkness and it wasn't what you meant to say or if you meant it..."

He looked panicked that I knew. Turning to look away from me so the back of his head was facing me now while he pretended to look around. Dodging my eyes.

"Beej?"

"You didn't tell me there were stepping stones here- wow that's so neat," he replied ignoring me and still looking away.

"Beej,"

"Y'know I once fell into this river because I was being too cocky on stepping stones-"

"-Billie,"

"It didn't end well- well I didn't drown I was fine. My clothes were wet- obviously and-"

"-Billie joe!"

He quickly spun around, his eyes wide and his mouth shut.

"Sorry I shouted..." I mumbled.

"...Sorry,"

"But- I mean- well did you? You're worrying me. Just tell me if you didn't," I blabbered on. Not wanting to make him feel inclined to say he did if he didn't. "I won't be angry or upset I just wanna know the truth because-"

"-I meant it," He replies cutting me off quite straight forward. His facial features were still, he must've been serious or trying to come across as.

I nodded, trying not to get to excited before asking the second question. Just remembering just because he felt it didn't mean anything. "How did you feel about it?"

"What- the connection?"

"Yeah... the connection, how did you feel about it?"

"I mean," he took a moment looking at the water fall to make a decision. His eyes flickered following the water as I looked at him from the side. "It surprised me," he finally got out, looking over at me. "Scared me too,"

"Scared?"

"Well... yeah scared. I never really realised we could have a spark like that together. You've always been my sisters annoying friend and now all this comes in to play. It's scary- I'll never admit half the things that scare me... but this? It scares the hell out of me Blaze Joy, really it does,"

"I guess I can agree with that..."

"You can?"

"It is all scary. This whole thing. The fake relationship, the problems we run into, the 'connection'. I'll never be ashamed to say that it's you that scares me. You were the one person I never thought this would happen with. And now look- but it scares me because you hold such... power over me with out even realising it. You make me feel powerless than I ever have. I'll envy you for that,"

"I do? Wait- power? What do you mean power?"

"You started all this. You end it on your terms. You get bored? You end the fake relationship. You get what you want? You end the fake relationship. You're satisfied? You end it. That's your call,"

"So why does that-"

"-because I don't want this to end,"

"Really?"

"Is that a surprise to you?"

"Well... kinda yeah. You seemed so not about the idea at the start and now-"

"-do you want it to end?" I questioned. Cutting him off being too scared that I might've said the wrong thing.

Taking a moment, staying silent before he opened his mouth again. "Well... technically... yeah,"

Ah shit.

I'm an idiot.

I guess I knew that things wouldn't work out for me as easily as they do in stories. But god- did he have to put it so bluntly?

Like hey- how about I just hand you a knife and you stab straight through my heart instead? Would that be easier for you Billie? Huh?

"Really- oh- oh... oh. Well- can- I- can I know why? I mean- a few days ago you even said you didn't want this to end. I don't- I don't understand?"

"Well... I did. But I changed my mind. I sorta- I got to thinking- y'know- on what I wanted. Really getting deep into my thoughts here. I thought a lot about this fake relationship. I realised that this- keeping up all of this- wasn't what I wanted-"

"-but-?"

"-let me finish,"

"Okay... sorry,"

"Anyway. I realised walking around every single day of every week for how ever long pretending to be your boyfriend to everyone around wasn't at all what I really wanted. At the start- it was. I never thought it through. But now? Well... I don't wanna fake it,"

"What are you... trying to say?"

"I- well- I don't know- I want- jeez I can't even speak,"

"Just tell me- what do you want Billie?"

He pushed his fingers through his hair breaking apart the strands of Blue. Also moving it from out his eyes. "I guess what I'm saying is. I want- well you. But I don't want you in the fake way. I want a real relationship. With... well with you, obviously,"

My voice felt so small, I couldn't find the right words to say. "...Really?"

"Y'know what actually- erm- maybe we should go back home." He awkwardly stated standing straight up to his feet.

I looked up confused before getting up myself. "What? Billie we got here not long ago?"

"Maybe we should go anyway- y'know?"

"No? Billie you didn't answer me. Do you really mean what you said?"

"What? Going home? Yes. Certainly. God I'm cold-" he began to rub his arms as he crossed them pretending he was cold, but I didn't see any goosebumps. "-are you cold? I am. Let's go."

I went to try and speak, but he grabbed me by the hand and pulled me as we both walked across the grass. He slightly pulled me as I annoyedly followed behind with his fingers wrapped around my wrist.

We made our way to the car. We got in the car. And we drove home. There wasn't much more to it then that.

The atmosphere in the air was awkward. I don't know if he meant to- but it was obvious he regretted what he said the moment it left his lips. But why say it?

Maybe he was thinking out loud?
Maybe he just didn't know when to stop?
Maybe he accidentally said too much?
Maybe he didn't mean any of it at all?

I would've asked him. But he already made it clear he wasn't talking about any of that any more.

So we drove home in silence. Not even the radio playing. We reached his, as we both got out and walked into Eden's still not talking.

We walked straight in. I turned to finally say something to Billie before he quickly rushed up the stairs.

I watched him as he made his way up them, not looking back, before the bedroom door clicked shut.

He didn't even flick me on the nose or anything?

"What's that about? What did you do to the poor bastard?" Eden laughed as I heard her walk out of the living room and next to me as I stood confused at the front door.

"What did I do to him? What did he do to me!"

"What did he-"

"-Confused the fuck out of me that's what,"