Alice leaned against Ford, a book propped in her hands as she sipped her cup of tea. The ship rocked under them, sending the flickering lights in the gally as she read and Ford noted next to her, comfortable and warm after the previous evening. It wasn't until Stan wandered in that Alice realized she might have made a fatal mistake.

"Good morning," Alice greeted Stan as he poured himself a mug of coffee and settled across from her and his twin. "Sleep well?"

Stan grunted in response, a slight frown on his face as he eyes her. He took a sip of his coffee, gaze flickering between them.

"You two look awful cozy this mornin'," He noted, a hint of mockery in his voice. "Slept well, did ya?"

Alice shifted, leaving her book on the table and casually flipping her collar up, praying he wouldn't notice the details of the night on her skin. Stan's watchful eyes sent a flicker of guilt over her, she'd forgotten he'd been on the ship.

"Something like that," Alice agreed, shifting her gaze to Ford.

"Yes, we slept well," Ford replied, his voice betraying a hint of anxiety as he looked back at her.

"And yourself?" Alice asked, hoping to guide the subject away from her.

"Oh, I slept just fine," Stan said, his tone laced with mockery. He took another sip of coffee, his eyes still fixed on them as he leaned back in his chair, a smirk on his face. "Heard some interestin' noise comin' from your bunk last night, though. Anything you two wanna share?"

Alice flushed, forcing her gaze away from Stan and into her mug of tea.

"I'm not sure what you're talking about, Stanley," She muttered, her voice betraying the truth. Stan's smirk only widened, as if he enjoyed the fact he could get under his skin.

"Really?" Stan drawled, his voice laced with sarcasm. "Because I could have sworn I heard some rather... passionate noises comin' from your room last night. Could've sworn I heard a certain woman's name being moaned a few times..."

"Stan," Ford growled, choking on his coffee. He set his mug down, his voice steady as he continued. "Shut. Up. Please."

Alice, turned her gaze toward the door, part of her very tempted to pitch herself over the rails to escape the conversation. Her hands flattened on the surface of the table, fingers inching over the wood as she tried to soothe her fluster.

"I didn't hear anyone calling your name, Stan," She responded, as cooly as she could manage. Stan chuckled, leaning back in his chair with a smug look on his face.

"Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm not complainin'," Stan said with a wink. "I think it's great to see my twin finally get some action. I'm just sayin', next time you two should really try to keep it down. These walls are paper thin, you know?"

Ford buried his face in his hands, "Stan, please, can we just... Move on from this?"

Alice turned her nose up, shooting a pointed glare at him, "Seven months together and I'm just 'some action'?"

"Hey, I didn't mean it like that," Stan chuckled, holding up his hands in mock surrender. "But you gotta admit, it's kinda funny how easy it is to get you two all riled up."

"I'm going to pitch myself off the boat," Alice groaned, burying her head in her hands. "On purpose this time."

"No, you're not," Ford said firmly, his hand grabbing her arm. "Don't even joke about that."

"Sorry," Alice murmured, drawing her face from her hands and sending Ford an almost reproachful look. "But look at him- He's never going to let me live this down."

"He's not going to let me live this down," Ford grumbled, running a hand through his hair. "He's going to tease me about this for the rest of our lives."

"Oh you bet I am," Stan confirmed with a wicked grin. "You gotta admit, it's pretty hilarious. The brilliant Ford Pines, all flustered and... distracted by the pretty lady. It's a good look on you, bro."

Alice glared at Stan, reaching out and taking her cup in her hands. She leaned into Ford's side, her eyes never leaving Stan. Alice sipped her tea, her gaze shifting to focus on the warm liquid in her cup.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, but I'm not here for your entertainment," She grumbled under her breath. "If you want a clown, I suggest you look in the mirror."

Stan's smirk faltered, surprised flickering across his features. Alice watched as he leaned back in his chair, taking a deep breath to study her, a hint of respect in his eyes.

"Okay, I gotta admit, that was a good one," Stan said with a grudging nod. "You're not as meek as you look."

"Careful, Stan," Ford warned teasingly, squeezing Alice's arm. "You might start to like her if she keeps this up."

"Oh please," Stan snorted, waving a dismissive hand. "She'd got some bite, I'll give her that, but that doesn't change the fact you two are a walkin' comedy show."

"Does that make you a walking tragedy?" Alice asked, playfully sneering at Stan. "Or the punchline?"

"Oh, touché," Stan said, a hint of respect in his voice as he leaned on the table. "You're really not going to make this easy for me, are you?"

"Every joke you make about us, I'll have one ready for you," Alice replied cooly.

"Is that a challenge?" Stan chuckled with a smirk. "Because I've got plenty more jokes up my sleeve."

Alice straightened, pulling herself from Ford's side and meeting Stan's smirk with one of her own.

"I'm sure you'll be easy to handle."

"Oh, I bet I can outsmart you," Stan boasted, a spark of a challenge in his eyes. "I'll have you rollin' your eyes so much, you'll think you're on a damn carnival ride."

"Alright, you two," Ford stated a hint of warning in his voice. "Let's keep the banter light, okay? This is a friendly competition, not a roast."

"I make no promises, bee," Alice softened slightly, leaning back in her seat and slipping her hand into Ford's.

"Pfft, look at you two, all lovey-dovey," Stan said with a roll of his eyes, his tone mocking. "It's almost sickeningly sweet."

"You're just bitter that no one's saying your name in bed," Alice responded, tearing her gaze from Ford and smirking at Stan. His eyes widened, his face turning red as he spluttered.

"I-I-, pfft, what do you know about it?" He managed, his voice lacking the previous confidence.

"I've spent years dealing with jabs from rich jerks and scientists who don't believe in behavioral studies," Alice responded, waving a hand and leaning onto the table. "There's not too much difference here."

Stan snorted a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Guess you've had plenty of experience dealin' with egotistical asshole then," He said, leaning back in his chair. "Too bad you ended up with Ford."

"Could have been worse," Alice replied, her smirk twitching. "I could have ended up with you."

"Please," Stan retorted, rolling his eyes. "Ford's a nerd with no social skills. I'm much more fun than him."

"Watch it, Stan," Ford chimed in. "I'll have you know I have plenty of social skills... sometimes."

Alice smiled, leaning back in her chair and draining her cup of tea. She set the cup down, smirking at Stan, and lifted her hand with Ford's fingers twined with hers.

"He has plenty of skills," Alice smirked, smugly, implication clear in her tone. Stan's face flushed a deeper shade of red, his usual smooth facade cracking slightly.

"You... You-" He started to say, but Ford interrupted.

"Okay, alright, that's enough," He said, voice firm despite the flush crossing his cheeks. "Let's keep the conversation PG, please."

"It's what he was going to tease us about," Alice smiled, her tone dripping with faux innocence. "It's only fair that I get to tease my boyfriend's twin back."

Stan opened his mouth to argue, but even Alice knew she had his corner. He couldn't complain when he was just as guilty as she was. He grumbled, his face still slightly red.

"Fine, fine," He mumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back in his chair. "But can you two at least... keep it down next time? Walls are paper thin, you know?"

Alice chuckled, standing and taking her empty cup to the gas stove.

"I wasn't making much noise," She replied honestly, pouring herself a cup of hot water and dropping a tea bag. She turned back to find him staring at her in disbelief, his eyes wide.

"Wait, seriously?" He asked, earning a quiet groat from Ford. "You mean... All those..."

"Please, Stan," Ford groaned again, his face buried in his hands, his words muffled through his palmed fingers. "Don't make this any more awkward than it already is."

"Oh, but this is too good, Sixer," Stan laughed, raising his brow at his twin. "You finally found a woman who's crazy enough to put up with you, and she's the one makin' you sound like a hormonal teenager? It's priceless."

Alice rolled her eyes, crossing back to Ford and gently guiding his face to look at her. She could see the red crossing his cheek, and she had to admit, he was perfect even when he was flustered. She leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"I'm going to compile my field notes," She smiled as she leaned back with her tea. "You're welcome to join if you need to get away from him."

"Lead the way," Ford mumbled, standing and taking her hand. Alice turned, gently leading him to the door and bumping it open with her hip.

"You two are ridiculous," Stan muttered, before raising his voice. "Don't forget to use protection next time!"

"You and Miss Right better do the same" Alice sneered back, turning and taking a backward step out the door. Stan let out a surprised laugh, annoyance giving way to amusement.

"Ha! I think I like you more every minute," He chuckled, leaning back with his coffee. "Go on, do your nerd stuff. Don't you two have some equations to solve or somethin'?"