One full week has passed since room 460 became a crime scene.

The Avalon is dealing with backlash and is under investigation, but the facility will be fine. It's Jeremy who was the problem, not anyone there. So Julia hasn't been all week. Actually, she's barely left Nate's room all week.

Nate and I are immersed in tour shit. There are a lot of meetings, a lot of planning, and coordinating, and on top of that, Nate's getting ready to film his music video for the Heartbreak Hotel song.

Aside from business as usual, he is all over the news from the Marriott incident. Today, he has a press conference over it, although he can't say much. It will most likely be Elliott doing all the talking and then turning the table to talk about the upcoming tour.

 I dress to impress with a lavender blouse and grey pencil skirt. Paul wears black, of course. I'm so tired, but I know we have a busy day ahead of us.  It will be just Nate and I as Paul is going to be Julia's bodyguard for today now that she's finally out of bed.

*****

Nate gets through the press conference with flying colors. This whole thing with Donovan is done and over with now. The next appointment is a meeting with Richard.

Richard and Elliot and a few managers are waiting around the table to go over the Tour in the studio conference room.

"We need to get the ball rolling on this, Nate. I know there's a lot going on in your personal life, but there's always a lot going on in your personal life. We can't fall behind. Ticket sales are through the roof. You sold out in one day for every single concert in the U.S., Never mind Europe. You have broken the record of most ticket sales in one day and beat out Taylor Swift in sold-out shows."

Holy hell! I look over to Nate, who nods and takes a sip of his water. I knew he'd sell out, but I had no idea he would beat any ticket sale records. Never mind beat out Swift in sold-out shows.

"In less than three months, you'll start the tour." Richard continues. "There's no turning back now."

Nate looks over to me and sees my excitement over this. Touring is so much fun. It's a full year of sightseeing and traveling around the world. It's a lot of work, but both Nate and I live for this. This is what makes all the hard work worth it. I'm beyond excited to move forward with this.

 But Nate is zoning out. Richard asked him about his health, and I literally had to kick him under the table. What the hell, Hollan. Focus!

"I'm sorry, say again?" Nate asks the  producer.

"You will have a private health care physician ready to tour with you, you said? Is that still on? If not, we will need to hire out, with your heart condition."

"Yes. I'm all set. I have my nurse who will be with me the entire year."

*****

"You're all over the place today, Playboy." I jot down all the things I need to remember from the meeting. We sit in the empty conference room now that the meeting is over.

"Ok, what's next? Oh, the Avalon. We have to call the Avalon. I want Julia to come on tour with me when she can, but we have to hold her spot at the Avalon."

He's not really serious right now. Is he?

"Nate...." I glance over at him. "She can't go on tour with you, you know that."

"Sure, she can. Artists fly out their girlfriends for a few days here and there all the time. Sometimes, they are with them for an entire leg of tour."

"Yeah, they aren't Julia. Anyways, she doesn't even have a passport, does she?"

"Help her get her passport as soon as possible." He demands, and I stare at him. He's fucking serious. "Go on, write it down."

I huff but begin to write. "You know she can't travel with you... it will be too much for her." 

"Well I'm not going a year with barely seeing my girlfriend. You don't think we can make it work, do you? Me and Julia. Long term." I can feel Nate's eyes on me so I give in and look up.

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to. It's written all over your face. You know I'm going to marry her, right? This is not new news to you."

"So you say. And when you do- Nate Hollan- your fan base will be cut in half. You know you can't get married." I remind him how this will affect his career.

"Not anytime soon." I take his hand. "Sweetie... if you get married, all those fans that are obsessed with you will be pissed off. You're off the market. Having a girlfriend, sure.. You always have girlfriends. Marriage is the real deal. It's not just a personal move. It's a career move." I explain and watch Nate sit back in his chair and listen. He shakes his head at me in disagreement. 

"If you were to go up to Elliott right now and tell him you are going to marry Julia within the next few years, what do you think his reaction will be? He'll tell you its a mistake for your career. And anyways, you have bigger problems. In nine months you will have eighteen years of bigger problems. Have you even talked to Julia about the fact you and I are having a child together?"

"And...? Trish. We're best friends. We made a fucking mistake. Doesn't mean we have to get married. You know that, right? We've always been best friends. That's all we'll ever be." Nate says harshly. He's been so rude to me lately. I swallow hard and look down. I was never asking him to marry me, but I need to know he's willing to co-parent and help raise this child.

"That's fine. But I'm not doing this alone. Is Julia prepared to share her time with you with not only your fans, but me? And your child? I'm gonna need your help. I can't be your personal assistant and juggle a kid as a single mom."

"Well aware." He pinches the tension between his eyes. "This is what I've been trying to tell you. I'm not going to tell you what to decide. But there's still plenty of time if you decide -"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now, Nate?" I slam my laptop closed. I can't believe we are back to this again. "It's what..have an abortion or quit working for you and become a single mom? You're not gonna help me, are you?" I burst out.

"I didn't say that. I didn't say anything, ok? But how the hell are you gonna travel with me on tour pregnant. And then with fucking newborn! You heard Richard. Tour is a year- the least! What if we add shows on? Huh? Then what?" He stand ups and begins to pace now.

"And you can barely keep your head above water now with your morning sickness. How can I rely on you to be my personal assistant? You know what your job entails. You're already slacking and you haven't even had the kid." 

Oh my God. What is WRONG with him? I know my cheeks are flushed and know my eyes begin to water from his words. I'm trying so damn hard to keep it together.

"You starting to become incompetent Trisha. I can't have that."

My heart  sinks.

"What did you just say?" I walk over to him and shove him. I've had enough. He's been treating me like shit. Now I'm fucking INCOMPETANT!? 

"Did you just say I'm incompetent, you sonofabitch? I'm trying. I can't help it I get sick every day!"

I go to push him again but he grabs my wrists and stops me.

"I know you can't, doll." Nate says softer. "I'm not saying that. But you know who I am and that I need a personal assistant. You remind me of who I am all the time. I need to remind you who you are and who I'm gonna need. I'm gonna need a reliable P.A."

"Are you firing me because I'm slacking??" I start crying. I can't believe this conversation is even happening right now. This is the last thing I need from him.

 Nate drops my hands and hugs me. "No, Trish. That's not what I'm saying. But if it comes to that point, you know I need a personal assistant. You know I'm gonna need to do what's best for my job. Richard won't stand for slacking. You know this. I love you, ok? You are my best friend. But if I have to fire your sexy ass and find someone that can keep up, I will."

"I can do this job. Just let me get through the first trimester." I say in his chest.

"My job doesn't care about trimesters, Trisha."

We end the conversation there when my phone alarm goes off. Nate has a meeting with the production team to go over the stage set up and then get sized for when wardrobe picks out his clothes for each concert.

I'm tired, hungry, nauseous, and have a headache all at the same time. And now, thanks to Nate, I'm hurt. I certainly haven't been drinking enough water today, and the lack of caffeine that I usually have is starting to show.

We finally slow down and grab a bite at the cafe in town. I'm ecstatic about sitting now and even welcome a few girls that pop in and see Nate, now wanting selfies. They take a good fifteen minutes  of his time, so I close my eyes, trying to snap out of this fog I'm in.

Once back at Ren's SUV, Nate comments on my sluggishness. I can't let him know how truly tired I really am now. Especially after the conversation we had this morning.

"You look like you're about to fall asleep on me, Trisha. We have two more meetings." He reminds me as we sit in the SUV.

"I'm fine, Nate." I snap. He turns to me and rests a hand on my cheek. I put mine over his and finally look up at him.

"Trisha. I'm gonna need to find a new P.A. aren't I?"

I break down and cry. I'm really not doing a good enough job for him, am I? I cry harder than I've cried in a while, and Nate pulls me in. I hide my face in his chest. I cry for a good amount of time, and when I finally look up, I notice Ren is bringing us back to Nate's. He pulls in, and Paul is waiting outside already.

Nate is telling me to go home? 

Is this him firing me? 

"Go home. Get some rest, ok?" He kisses the top of my head.

"Yeah, you may want to get up there." Paul gives Nate a look. A look like Julia isn't doing as well as we thought.

"Trish, can you do me one favor? Can you reschedule those meetings for me today? That's all I need you to do."

He talks to me like I really am incompetent.  I quickly and turn away when I feel my bottom lip quiver. Paul knows to say nothing as I look out my window and cry the whole drive home.

*****

*James*

Julia is all over the place today. Fine one minute, freaking out the next. Obviously, we all knew this would happen.

She wouldn't eat breakfast. I tried,  Jonah tried,  Casey tried. Jonah ended up having to give her morning meds to her on an empty stomach.

Casey comes out of her bedroom and puts her sneakers on. "I'm still going to take James and the dog to the park. They could use some fresh air." She tells Nate who comes home early to check on Julia. I hate that he is the one who can take care of her right now. I hate that I'm the way I am right now and am starting to get discouraged.

Hell, Casey even has to help me put on my sneakers and tie them like I'm a damn three year old. She can tell I'm frustrated and embarrassed while she gets me ready.

"Hey, it's ok James." She looks up at me while tying my sneaker. "Everything is going to come back to you. It just takes time." 

Time. Right. And while I'm taking my time, Nate is winning in the race. I can feel Julia turning to him more and more and me less and less. I'm losing her.

Casey puts Maggie's harness on her and grabs a few waters. I walk over to the pantry and point to the dog treats  but at first Casey doesn't know what I want. It takes us a few minutes of charades, god love her, but she can be dumb as a box of rocks when it comes to charades with me.

Finally, she catches on and grabs the bag of dog treats. I stick a handful of them in my shorts pocket. Maggie always gets a few while we walk the park.

While walking, Casey  chats away. She reminds me of Julia sometimes.  Her personality. The way she gets lost in her own thoughts and chats away without needing me to respond. I like that about her. She's comfortable. We walk the path together letting Maggie lead the way.

"This whole thing with Jonah. I don't know, James. I really like him. Like a lot. But he's so damn quiet. I can never tell what he's thinking. And last night he told me how Nate hired him to go on tour with him and be his personal nurse. Which is an amazing thing to do and will be a great experience, but aren't tours like... up to a year long of traveling?" She looks up at me and I nod. 

"So does that mean I still live in Nate's apartment and take care of you and Julia full time? With no help?"

I shrug. I feel bad for Casey. I think she realizes she's in over her head a little. I know her and Julia are close and I love that, but I don't know if Casey will be able to handle Julia when she has an episode. And it's bound to happen. I mean, look at this morning. We couldn't even get her to eat breakfast. I even went on strike myself on eating but she wasn't budging. It wasn't until she finally went into her bedroom that I hoofed my food down being starving. Nate seems to be the only one to get through to her.  How the hell is all this gonna work out?

"I just wish I knew what was going on. I've never been in a serious relationship. Not like this. And these circumstances are.... unique.  I don't know how I would feel about not seeing Jonah for an entire year. I certainly don't know if I'm qualified to take care of Julia by myself. You, you're easy. I know I struggle with trying to understand you and you get mad at me for that." Her eyes water. God she IS a mini Julia, isn't she?

I look down at Casey, furrow my brows and shake my head no. I don't want her to ever think I'm mad at her. Frustrated, maybe. But that's to be expected. 

"Maybe we should learn sign language together or something. Maybe that would help out a little." 

I stop walking and study Casey's face for a moment. That actually isn't such a bad idea. If I don't ever end up being able to speak again, maybe sign language would be the next best thing. I smile down at the nurse and nod my head at her idea.

Sign language.  I'm sure we could learn that.

*****

* Trisha*

"What happened this morning, Banks? You're a mess." Paul follows me through the isles of the grocery store.

"I think I'm doing this alone, Paulie." I say while throwing boxes of cereal in to the cart without looking at him. I don't even eat cereal.  I'm so zoned out today. Paul shakes his head at me  and puts the cereal back and takes over pushing the shopping carriage, picking put the things he knows we need  now that he practically lives with me.

"He'll come around..." Paul lies and I look up at him.

"You think so?" I cock a brow at him.

"No." 

"Yeah, that's what I thought. So, what... I quit my job and become a full-time single parent? Paul, that sounds horrific."

"You still have options if you really don't want to do this. I'm not telling you to do anything. I know Nate is. I personally don't agree with that. But it isn't my body or my baby." He explains. I like how Paul is comfortable with me. After all these years, he is finally opening up.

"I'm with you. I don't think I could ever do that. I would regret it, I'm sure. But Nate isn't making this very easy for me. He wants nothing to do with it. All he cares about is Julia now."

"You sound like a jealous ex." He laughs earning a swift hit to the arm. Not like he even flinched but still.

"And then what? Everyone goes off on tour and leaves me behind to be pregnant and then deal with a newborn all alone. Nate moves forward with Julia, and I stay stuck right where I am. I mean... marriage was never in the books for either of us. Now, suddenly, he wants to marry Julia. No one is going to want to be with me with a kid. I'm not getting any younger, Paulie. This mistake... this was a big one. But it's been made. I just wish I wasn't in it alone." 

We stay silent after that and continue shopping. Paul doesn't really know what to say. Because it's true. Everyone will go on tour, including him, and I will be left behind dealing with the aftermath of sleeping with Nate.

Nate and his stupid sperm.