You make me want to cut myself open
Just so I can see if, maybe, i can fix what's wrong with me.

You make me want to play on the highway with a ball in the middle of rush hour
Just so I can see if, maybe, I can solve all of your problems

You make me want to cry in public, in the middle of a crowded restaurant I WORK in,
Just so I can see if, maybe, my mom still cares enough to listen to what's wrong

You make me want to die,
Just so I can see if, maybe, I won't have to see how disappointed you are after one more time, when you find me lying lifeless and look with that same disappointment at your daughter for not being strong enough.

So congratulations, mom.
You win.

9/23/18

k.s.