Sometimes in life we are told

Watch the signals

More than often actually

Traffic signals

Body language signals

Signals in sports

We have unspoken signals in relationships

And friendships

In our interactions with other human beings

We don't tend to talk about them

So they can be unclear at times

And different people read different signals in their own ways

Like with you

And I'm mad at myself

Because I don't know how

To read some signals very well

More like at all

People tell us

The world is your oyster

Only for me it feels like

You and the rest of the world

Are the ocean

And I am struggling to swim

And all you do is watch

You don't provide me with a life preserver

But I want you to be my life preserver

So I don't have to struggle

It can also feel like I've jumped from an airplane

Even though I wouldn't do that

I have a fear of heights

And you could give me a parachute

But you don't

I want you to be my parachute

Or maybe you could be the one to grab me

And tell me

Don't jump

Don't even get in that airplane

Jessica you know you're afraid of heights

But instead you'd be the one to laugh

And say

I think I'm supposed to feel something about that

I feel like I'm forgetting something

Oh well

She was stupid

Glad she's gone now