Alone. Abandoned. I know what it feels like. And... Unfortunately, I know I made people feel it too.

And I'm pretty shameful about that. But I did what I did. That was my choice. Even if it was wrong, that's too late.

Leaving is, I think, as hard as being left. Because, being abandoned always makes you clueless, puzzled, torn apart. But leaving makes you feel guilty. It makes you feel shameful. And remorseful. It makes you feel like you no longer deserve to receive love from anyone in any kind of form.

I am the kind that have been left. But, indeed, I slowly began to become the one who leaves.

However, I never forget. I never... Get over it. I simply can't. No matter who left. No matter in what circumstances.

I'm always the one who keep old conversations. The one who can't help but read those messages in the middle of the night through my tears.

I am sure I would be able to keep paying a dead friend's phone's bill just to be able to send messages at 3am... Even if I know I would never receive any answer.

That's stupid. I know it.

But, hey... I guess in the end, we're all vulnerable.

And we all lived in the past at some point.