a breath of spring on a winter day

On a day I lost a friend,

On a day my sun couldn't let me see my family,

On a day I feel small again,

You distract me to the small joys of youth.

A group of boys laughing on the street,

New faces, twinkling eyes, fine build,

And my pounding chest.

You taught me how fantastical my mind can wander,

You held my hand to see these people

When they belong in my head but not in my hand.

Oh, how cruel can you be?

Your cheekiness that returns me to youth

A breath of spring

On my winter days.

Yet a breath of spring is all you are.

If hate can be expressed beyond hate,

I'd call it love.

And so I hate you beyond hate.