Fear Of Love
By Vallwrites

~

I crave your love.
I think,
I actually need your love.
But,
it's your love
that terrifies me the most in this world.
You see,
I was not welcomed into the world
with two parents
who loved each other dearly.
They forced their love for each other,
for whatever reason,
and in the process
showed me that
that was love.
No kisses.
No hugs.
No public display of affection.
No, I love you's.
They showed me a different side to love.
The arguments.
The shouting.
The screaming.
Plates being smashed.
Punches being thrown.
Annoyance.
Frustration.
Hatred.
Hatred.
That was my only portrayal of love,
my love.
So,
forgive me
for pushing you away
when you show me affection.
Forgive me
for hating you
when you tell me
that you love me.
Forgive me
for ignoring you
when you've done something nice.
I'm sorry,
my love.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Please,
forgive me,
because this love
is simply
all I know.

27.08.2022