Don't embarrass yourself.
They always said that,
But the words just stayed the same.
I remember going up to my band teacher and saying,
"It's okay Miss! My life is already an embarrassment!"

They think it's funny,
They never take me seriously.
To be fair I was smiling,
But the smiling only blocks the darkness inside.

Don't you think YouTubers are the same?
Wearing a mask, a mask that is their channels?
But on the inside they're really just like the rest of us?
We all wear masks that make us forget who we are.

I've forgotten how young I was
How naive I was
How... stupid I was.
Because even as a child I act older than reality makes me out to be.

My life is an embarrassment.
I can never be as good as a musician like my grandfather.
I can never be as good as a writer and teacher like my grandmother.
It's why they never left any of their possessions to me.

No instruments from Grandpa,
No books from Grandma.
No hope from God.
No hope from myself.

I'm destined to walk a path of misery and death.
A path we all must walk.
But mine is different,
So let me show you why.

Imagine yourself as a European.
Caucasian to be exact.
Now be poor. Poor runs through your veins.
Now like writing,
Now play videogames,
Now be the wrong gender,
Now be a Dirty Jew,
Now be a living reminder of failure.

I'm an embarrassment and that's all I've been,
And that's all I will ever be.