I open my mouth for Jack to explore, and god you would think he's eating me. I feel like I'm on fire; I had to take off my jacket because it got so hot. His hands explore my back and my stomach, finding their way to my chest (ever so slightly missing the port on my chest), then to my shoulder blades. He's gentle so my shoulder doesn't hurt, which just made me realize he knew about my left shoulder and arm being 'bad'. The hand holding the railing is now going under his shirt, to feel his ripped abs that I'm so jealous of but also find so damn hot. One of his hands makes its way to my ass, he squeezed me and lifts me closer to him. I gasp. It's fair to say we both have a little problem now, which confirms he's not as straight as everyone thought he was. I keep tugging on his hair, playing with it, twirling it around my fingers. I feel his warm skin under his shirt, his skin is so smooth. Both his hands are now on my ass, holding me up. We break to breathe every few seconds but get right back into it. This could never get old, never.

I broke to take a huge gasp, I felt like I was drowning, but it felt so good. I lean my forehead against him, my hands somehow finding their way around his neck like I'm clinging on for dear life.

"Come back to my place tonight?" He asks when we've caught our breath. "Not for sex, I promise. But so I can get to know you more, and vice versa."

"What time is it?"

He takes his hand away from my butt to look at his watch. "About 10:10," his hand goes back to my ass, which makes me want to laugh.

"I'll call Tim and tell him to cover for me," I reach for my phone.

He grabs it, "That can wait for a second," he puts it down into his pocket. "Let's just... stay like this, for a little, please?"

I rest on his lap, laying my head on his chest. His head lays on mine, his arms wrapping around my lower back. I'm so small compared to him. I like him. I love him. We sat there for what felt like forever, I got so tired I thought I'd fall asleep. Now and then he'd kiss the top of my head, and rub his fingers along my side. I think I eventually did fall asleep because all I remember is opening my eyes to my phone ringing. Jack pulls it out of his pocket and sees the name. He moans out of announce in his equally as sleepy state, which I find incredibly hot. He answers it for me. I laugh, knowing it's Tim.

"Mac can't come to the phone right now," he says and I laugh and reach up behind me, cupping his face. "No, I didn't do anything to him, he's perfectly fine. Currently curled up against me," he looks down at me and smirks. "We were just having a blast."

"Okay, give it," I take my hand from his face and snatch the phone. "I'm here Tim, don't worry about it."

"I have so many questions. For one, are you ready to go?"

"I was just about to call you about that. Jack and I are gonna stay longer, we have a lot of talking to do. And, I'm gonna need you to cover for me. I'm gonna tell Mom I'm spending the night with you, that it's been a long day."

"Damn it, Mac, you aren't gonna go fuck him, are you? I thought you were gonna end this for good! Why did he say you were curled up against him? Are you still even here?"

"No, no, yes, and yes. I can't explain right now, just trust me and help me out, please? Please?"

He sighs. "You owe me for this. Just, don't get hurt, Mac. Don't get hurt or I might really v[p kill him."

I laugh, then look at a smiling Jack, who has been staring at me with the most loving look. "I won't; trust me. I gotta go, I'll text you in the morning," I hang up and turn in the arms restraining me. "I think it's time to go," His stare never leaves, and his smile grows slowly, teasing my heart. "Stop staring at me like that," I laugh and turn.

I make a move to stand up but he doesn't let me go.

"Why so shy all of a sudden?" He whispered in my ear, so close his lip brushed against it. "What happened to all that confidence?"

I squirm, not trying to leave but because I feel my skin crawling, in a good way though. He grunts against my ear, then moves and kisses my neck. I gasp in shock as he nibbles at my skin. My hands find their way to his, meanwhile, all his hands want to do is feel around my stomach and sides. He's an expert at this. After a while, we ended up in his car, and even then he wouldn't let go of me. It felt nice, mainly because he looked worried whenever he did let go of me like I'd disappear or run away.

He put me in the car first and even bent down to kiss me before running across the front to get to the driver. I giggle as he gets in and grins at me. He starts the car, backs out, then starts driving. He grabs my hand, interlocking our fingers; something we haven't done before. It feels nice and real.

"I know this may sound insensitive, but why now are you deciding to try a relationship?" I asked carefully.

"I know you have an idea of my past with relationships. Honestly, I've never felt this way before. I've never felt this happy with another person. I never felt like I liked them, I never could reciprocate the feelings. But this is so much more different. I can't get enough of you, you're like a drug. I have to have you or I lose my mind. I lashed out at the gang, and I sometimes yelled at my parents that entire week we didnt talk. Not my Nan, I couldn't ever yell at her.

"She really loves you, by the way, and keeps on wondering when you're coming back to visit. She wouldn't stop gushing about how nice you were and how she wanted to steal you from me when you come over next. Said you were 'such a sweet gentleman' and how I 'better be nice' or she'd kill me for hurting you. Hell, maybe she knew I had a thing for you before I did. It'd make sense. I feel like everyone around me knew before I knew."

"Everyone, what do you mean?"

"Oh yeah, the gang confronted me about me being a jackass to them, they said I was whipped. I didn't believe it then, then they started just nailing me in the fucking brain," he starts talking with his hand, lifting both our hands together to show the extent of his explanations. " 'You've been going crazy since Mac left school'. 'You act like you're a drug addict'. 'Mac's not here for one day and you go into a panic.' 'You're always staring out into space now.' 'You always have a stupid ugly smile on your face.' 'You never acted like that with the girls, what's different about Mac?' God, they just wouldn't stop."

"What was your response to the last question?"

Our hands drop back to the center console, "I couldn't say anything. I think that's when it started to hit me. All I could think of was how I felt when I was with all the girls in my past, then I thought of how I felt with you. I thought I was going crazy at first. Actually liking a guy, I didn't expect that of myself. I mean, there's nothing wrong with two guys being together. I was never homophobic like my parents, I mean obviously, look at us now. I can't fucking leave your side. But at the time I was just surprised and scared of these new thoughts. I even skipped practice because I couldn't wrap my head around that thought. I went home and just laid there for hours, thinking and thinking. I fell asleep and ended up dreaming about you. I woke up and decided at that moment I wouldn't think about it too much.

"The more I tried to ignore the thought, the stronger it became. Then I saw you running from Gene, and I changed to a different person. I even threatened him, and he's like my brother. That's why he punched me, to knock some sense into me, and it helped. When I saw you in the office, all I wanted to do was hug you, but I told myself what I felt was just my dick not thinking straight because I wasn't with a girl for a while. I forced myself to think that, but at the same time, I knew I wanted you in my life still. Then I fucked up, I went to my default asshole mode. My father always told me feelings were for girls, and I needed to be a man, which is why I said all that shit in the office. I just... got scared. But, I realized I fucked up when she told me to leave while you two talked, and I wanted to apologize but I was still scared.

"So I made up my mind to at least keep you in my life somehow. Which is why I wouldn't leave you alone. The past few days have been torcher, all I could think about was you. I dreamed about you, that's all I could do, and the only way to keep you in my life was through Tim, even though I can't stand the dude. And I know he's your brother and all, and I get why he hates me so much, especially now, finding out I hurt you and you've loved me for so long... If my cousin was in the same position, I would be pissed at the dude or the girl that hurt her."

"Boy or girl? Is she bi?"

"No, she said something like Pansexual. I don't know what that means, but she said it's not a sexual attraction to pots and pans."

I burst out laughing, making him grin. It's nice and peaceful after that. Soon enough we turn onto his road, I remember it because of the cool house with the sunflower garden, they're so tall. I'm not even close to being tired I'm so awake right now it's like I have energy drink after energy drink chugging through my veins.

We pull into his driveway, and he shuts off the car but doesn't move to get out. He warned me that we needed to be quiet, his parents should be asleep in their room, he said we were going to his room, and then traveling down to the basement. His den that the boys call the bachelor pad. I nod and follow him out of the car and to the front door, he opens his phone and unlocks the door through an app, I find that so freaking cool. When we're inside he presses the button again and it locks. He says it's quieter than using keys. We creep up the stairs, having very low creaks that don't last long. It's definitely a newer house, whereas in mine you can't set foot on the floor without the wood crying. He slowly opens his door and pushes us both in before closing it again and sighing. He turns on a lamp next to him.

"I think we're in the clear," he smiles and wraps his arms around my waist. I rest my hands on his chest. " I'm sorry I can't let my parents know about you..." He whispers his apology and frowns. His eyes look dull, sad, and disappointed.

"It's okay, I get it," I run my hands up to his shoulders.

"But, I want to be with you, I really do. Please, be my real boyfriend? Like really. I want to mean it, not just when it's hot and heavy."

I giggle but lean up and kiss his chin. "I will be your boyfriend; your real boyfriend."

His eyes focus on me, pupils dilating, fixating, and all because of me. He turns us, my back to the door, he gently pushes me against it and softly kisses my lips. I hear a click, then his hands travel to my sides then my ass. He lifts me up, pressing me deeper into the door, I deepen the kiss and wrap my legs around his waist. He turns us and I'm put down on the bed, softly, gently, like I'm glass that can shatter with a heavy touch.

"You've just given me another reason to love you," I mumble against his lips when we part.

He exhales sharply, and his face flushes red. "I don't know if I can wait for the basement..." He presses up against me, obviously having a little situation.

"We'll be silent. I don't care what happens, just no sex."

"I don't want sex yet either, I just want to kiss you, feel you, hug you, hold you. I want to take this at your pace, no matter what that pace is."

"I don't want sex, but I'd love to give you a little help."

He swallows hard and dives into another kiss. I laugh into the kiss.