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"So...how'd it go?"

"He asked me to go back to his place."

"And?"

"I said no! Jeez..."

I laughed at his response, and soon he started laughing too. Of course he turned down Nades offer, the guys a virgin. He's too innocent to even consider it. Once our laughter died down and we grew serious for a second, I turned back to him to ask another question. "So you gonna go out with him again?"

"Nah. He's nice, but...I'm not really interested love-wise."

"Aw what happened? Did he scare you off?" I joked, flicking a piece of popcorn in his direction. It hit the point of his nose, making him scrunch his face up and giggle. His giggles are so awkward and adorable.

"I just wasn't that interested in him." He shrugged and glued his eyes back to the TV. He was making me watch some weird movie about space. I hadn't been watching it, only talking to him the entire time about his date with Nade last night. I was surprised that Nade asked him out a day after he gave his number to him. I mean when I first met Nade, it took him a week to ask me to the movies. Maybe he's grown some balls since I last saw him.

"What are you interested in? These stupid space movies and your fans seem to be the only things you care about."

"Hey! Star Wars is amazing! And there's nothing wrong with caring about my fans, they're really nice once you meet them and talk to them."

"Your ego is showing, Jordan." I threw another piece of popcorn at his face, but this time he managed to dodge it before it hit his eye.

"Stop throwing popcorn at me! You're so mean to me..." He scooted on the far end of the couch and got into a pouting stance, sticking out his bottom lip and crossing his arms. Adorable. So damn adorable.

"Mean is part of the package," I replied, shoving more popcorn in my mouth and turning back to the TV. Some green dude who looked like a crippled goblin was speaking cave man to a blonde sweaty weirdo with a bowl cut. Yay. Star Wars.

"You just like making me miserable, don't you?" He whined pitifully. I rolled my eyes and sat my bag of popcorn on the table beside me before walking over to the other side of the couch and picking up Jordan, throwing him over my shoulder, and going back to my side of the couch.

"What are you doing?!" He demanded angrily, squirming and fighting to get out of my arms. He was so weak, it was so cute. He may have muscles but he does not know how to use them.

"I can be a lot meaner, Jordan. So now you're going to watch Star Wars while you sit in my lap." Okay so maybe I am pushing the whole acquaintance thing out the window, but I really don't care. This is how I want to interact with him. This is how I want our friendship to be, teasing and hilarious, but occasionally sentimental.

I plopped down on the couch and sat him down on my crossed legs, while he giggled and went limp against me. He was stretched out across the couch, his head and upper half on my lap and the rest of him sprawled across the other end of the couch. He looked so adorable. I've used that stupid word so many times today, but it's the only one that can even come close to describing the amount of cuteness Jordan held. It's like having all of your favorite cat videos and cute animal related things stuffed into one human being. As weird and sexual as that sounds.

He's definitely my favorite cat video.

"Luke, I am your father," the TV screen boomed. I scoffed at the words and their cheesiness. Oh wow, who didn't see that coming? Darth is the baby daddy. Who knew.

"Tom, I am your father!" Jordan declared, booping me on the nose and giggling.

"Huh. No wonder I'm so hideous."

"Hey! That's mean!"

"It's not mean if I'm insulting myself too."

"Yes it is! That's like being double mean."

"Double mean?"

"Yes. You are mean times two, Thomas Cassell."

"Yes because that makes perfect sense." I rolled my eyes for the hundredth time that day. The movie continued on, and it was actually getting a little interesting. The sweaty blonde kid got his hand chopped off for some reason and now he's dangling from the bottom of a ship thing. I didn't even notice Jordan was staring at me until the movie buffered for a second and I looked to Jordan to see if he shared the equal amount of annoyance with me about it, and I caught him in the act of it. He didn't look away though, he just kept staring at me.

"See something you like, nerd?" I asked sarcastically.

"I wish I'd met you before I went through all of that stuff. It probably would've saved me from a lot of things."

"What kinda things?"

"Well...abusive relationships, poor life choices, very very bad decisions...I just wish I could've known you earlier in my life."

"I think it's better that you didn't. I was...really not a very good person when I was younger."

"What does that mean?"

"It means I would've gotten you into some bad trouble."

"Did you do drugs?" He asked bluntly.

"I did everything my parents told me not to do. So yes, drugs."

"Maybe if I had known you I could've helped you."

"Because you're so much better than me?" I snapped.

"No, because you needed somebody who cared enough about you to say I love you and I don't want you to get hurt."

"Well...thanks, I guess." I'm such a jerk. He just wanted to help me and of course I went off on him.

"You're welcome," he responded tiredly. Great. Now he's fed up with me.

"I have to go." I managed to slip off the couch without moving him, then I made a beeline for the coat hanger so I could get my stuff. I need to get out of here. It's Friday and I need alcohol. James is probably looking for me anyway.

"Where are you going? I thought we were gonna watch the rest of the episodes." I could hear the sadness and disappointment in his voice, and it only made me rush to put on my stuff faster.

"Later. I have to go." I slipped on my jacket, zipping it up,as fast as I could and rushing off towards the front door. I was almost to the door when a tug from my jacket held me back for a moment. I sighed and turned to face the stubborn nerd in front of me, who had an equally as stubborn look on his face at the moment.

"If you're going to the bar, I wanna go too."

"Are you serious?" I laughed. "Your body can't handle alcohol, kid. You nearly died the last time you had it."

"Shut up! I'll be able to this time. And don't call me kid. I'm older than you."

"Jordan you're not coming with me."

"I am too! And there's nothing you can do about it." He crossed his arms in front of his chest stubbornly.

"Fine. Let's go."

Let's see how long it takes for him to give up and go home.

~

"Please take me home..." The sick, sad, and drunk nerd beside me begged pathetically. He was I only laughed at the state he was in. This is what he gets for trying to drink as much alcohol as me. I have no idea what he was thinking when he made that decision. He's killed himself.

"You'll be alright. Hey James, why don't you get him another beer?" I joked to the bar tender, who was laughing himself as he cleaned the glass cups with a towel.

"I'm right on it. Or would he like some vodka instead?" The words alone made the poor nerd gag, and we both laughed at him.

"No more...please take me home..." Jordan whimpered pathetically. I almost felt sorry for him. But come on, how can I feel bad for him if he brought this upon himself? He chose to drink nine beers, it's his fault for being so sick.

"Maybe you should take him home, Tom. He doesn't look good." James gave me a look that basically said this was my fault, and I scoffed.

"It's his fault for drinking that much beer. I told him not to come with me, but he wouldn't leave me alone until I let him come. This isn't my fault." I chugged down the last of my tenth beer and stole the one beside Jordan's head that was still half full. It's not like he's gonna drink it anyway.

"Stop being so mean and take the poor soul home. Have you no sympathy for human beings?"

"I do have sympathy, just not when it's the human's fault for being stupid."

"So what if it's his fault? He probably only did it to impress you."

"And that's his fault for wanting to impress me."

"And it's your fault for not giving him the proper attention he needs to feel appreciated by you."

"What?! I appreciate him!"

"Then tell that to his face!"

"I don't have to!"

"Good lord you are stubborn. Just tell the poor boy you appreciate him. It's not like you're proposing to him or something."

"Fine." I swiveled my stool sideways to face Jordan and spat out the words that I was supposed to say without looking at him. "I appreciate you." Ugh, I am never saying that ever again.

"He didn't hear you, you twat," James stated dully.

"What? I practically yelled it, how did he not-"

"He passed out. Take him home before I kick you both out."

"Wh-..." My eyes landed on Jordan's closed ones. I didn't notice how terrible he looked until now, when he was passed out and completely wasted.

Why am I such an asshole?

"Was he really trying to impress me?" I asked James, who had the biggest smirk on his face.

"Yes, but you were too busy laughing at him to notice. Don't lose him Tom, I can tell he really likes you. I know you like him too."

I rolled my eyes and slid off the stool, sitting my bottle down long enough to pick up Jordan and sling him over my shoulder. "Yeah yeah, I get it. I'm the bad guy and I should be thankful for having the little nerd around. I'll take him home, alright?"

"Thank you. Have a good night, okay?" He called as I headed out of the place, Jordan still draped over my shoulder.

It's gonna be hard to have a good night when I'm dealing with so much guilt.

~

"This the place?" The cab driver called front the front, nodding towards the apartment complex. I nodded and hastily pulled out a twenty, frowning when I realized it was the last one I had.

"Uh yeah, how much I owe you man?" I hope it's not over twenty bucks.

The driver just shook his head. "Don't worry about it kid. Just get out of here."

"Really?"

"Yeah I'm just glad you didn't drive the kid home yourself. Don't worry about it."

Huh. Maybe there is a bit of hope left for humanity. "Thank you so much dude." I grabbed Jordan around the waist and opened the car door with my free hand, pulling him out as gently as I could without hitting his body on anything. Once I pulled him out and got a few feet away from the car, the driver pulled off and we were alone again. I threw him over my shoulder again and headed towards the apartment complex.

I didn't notice the flashing red and blue lights until I walked a little further towards the complex. And when I walked a few feet closer, I began to realize the situation and why there were cops and ambulances everywhere. A stretcher was being pulled out the doors of the place by two men in uniforms, and my heart stopped when I realized who it was on the stretcher. A black sheet covered nearly all of his body, but I saw his face before they covered it up too.

Vincent.

"Sir? Hey, you alright?" A voice snapped me out of my trance and I snapped my head to the side to see a guy in a uniform looking at me. He wasn't a cop, he had to have been a paramedic or something. He had gloves on and a stethoscope around his neck.

"W-What happened?" Did someone kill him? Did he have a heart attack and die? Was it an accident?

"I can't really tell you that. May I ask why you have a man thrown over your shoulder?" He pointed at Jordan, whom I'd forgotten was there. Jordan. He can't go home, not when this just happened. When he wakes up...oh my god, what's he gonna think? Was he friends with Vincent? Did they talk a lot?

"He's my friend h-he drank too much. He knew Vincent, what happened? Was it an accident?"

A look of pity crossed his face. He looked back towards the scene of ambulances and police cars like it physically pained him. "Wasn't an accident son. Wasn't a murder either."

Suicide. Oh my god he killed himself.

I forced back the nausea making it's way up my throat and tried to focus on not passing out. I focused on the paramedics shoes instead and thought of Jordan. Jordan's smile, Jordan's laugh, Jordan's eyes. The world isn't corrupt and it doesn't destroy everything that shines because Jordan is still here. He hasn't been destroyed yet.

"We aren't letting anyone enter the building until we clean up the scene, which could take a few hours. You got anywhere else to take him until then?"

I nodded slowly, my eyes still glued to the stretcher that held Victors body. Where could I take him? My house. There's a chance Tucker and Sonja won't be home and I can avoid their questions. What do I tell him when he wakes up? Nothing, I can't tell him. I'll worry about it later.

"I-I have to go. Thank you." I ripped my eyes away from the scene and turned back to the street. The paramedic tried to call after me, but I ignored him. How am I gonna get Jordan to my house? I'm lucky that cab driver didn't ask me to pay. I don't have enough to get home.

I sighed and pulled out my phone with my free hand, punching in the familiar number and waiting for them to pick up. He better pick up. He owes me a favor after the ecstasy incident.

"Hello?" A familiar voice asked.

"Hey Tucker, I need a favor man."

"I'm not cleaning your room again dude, I think I caught rabies the last time I tried."

"Not that, I need a ride. It's really important." I tried to keep my voice from cracking, but it was really hard. Damn my stupid emotions.

"You alright? Did something happen?"

"I...don't really want to talk about right now. I just need a ride. Can you come pick me up?"

"Sure, just give me the address and I'll head right down there."

"M-Madisonburg apartments."

~

The car ride was awkward. Not only because Jordan was snoring the whole time, but because Tucker and I hadn't said a single word to each other yet. Occasionally he'd look over at me or at the mirror so he could look at Jordan, but otherwise he didn't say a word. I was hoping and praying he wouldn't question it, but that didn't work.

"So...who's that?" He asked awkwardly. I sighed and let my head hit the side of the window in frustration.

"It's Jordan."

"Oh. And uh...what's he to you?"

"An acquaintance."

"Alright. Why is your acquaintance unconscious?"

"Can you not grill me?" I snapped at him.

"I'm not grilling you man, I just wanna know why there's a guy passed out in the backseat of my car. You do know I had to leave in the middle of my date with Sonj, right?"

"You owe me after giving me ecstasy instead of acid reducers," I seethed through gritted teeth.

"Okay I'm sorry, I was just trying to make you have a good time. But seriously, why are you hanging out with this guy and why is he passed out?"

"We were drinking together and he had too much. I took him back to his apartment and I couldn't go inside because there was a crime scene in the building. I didn't have any money to call a cab so I called you. Happy now?"

"Wow, you must really care about this guy to take him home. How come I've never met him?"

"Because I knew you'd ask a gazillion questions about him. Which you did. So there you go."

"Oh come on, I'm your best friend dude. I wanna know who you're dating and all that stuff."

"I am not dating him."

"Really? You aren't?"

"No. I'm not."

"So you wouldn't mind if I did this?" He slammed on the brakes, causing the both of us to jerk forward and Jordan to slam against the back of my seat, then fall into the floor.

"Tucker you asshole!" I growled and shoved him hard, before climbing out of my seat and going in the back of the car. I pulled Jordan out of the floor and into my lap, checking his body for any scrapes or cuts he might've gotten when he hit my seat. He looked okay, aside from the sick pale color his face was.

"And you said you weren't dating him," I heard Tucker laugh. I glared at the back of his head, trying my hardest to kill him with just my eyes.

"I'm not dating him," I hissed.

"You went straight into defense mode when he got hurt, don't tell me you don't like the guy."

"I said I wasn't dating him, I never said I didn't like him." I cradled Jordan's head against my shoulder and pulled the rest of him into my arms. I should sock Tucker in the face for that. He could've gotten hurt from that hit.

"Ah I see what's going on here. I gotcha man." The car began moving again, foiling my plans to punch Tucker in the head. I can't punch him while he's driving, I'd get us all killed.

"You've got what exactly?"

"You're taking it slow, right? I get it, totally understand."

"You're an idiot."

"And you're in looove!" He sang in a high pitched girl voice. I shook my head but I had to crack a smile.

I think I am in love.
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- Lee