"See?" I watched Jordan lips move from the corner of my eye as I stared down at the man in the mirror. He didn't look...fat, per say. Curvy was a good description. Slim legs with nice thighs, medium sized waist, broad shoulders, nice complexion. Is this even me? The last time I looked at myself...god, I don't even want to think about it. How long ago had it been since I last looked inside of a mirror?

"I look-..." The word caught in my throat, but Jordan used a different one, a better one instead.

"Beautiful. You look really good in skinny jeans. So, ready to go now?"

"I don't even look like myself," I replied, gaping at the eyes staring back at me. The last time I looked into a mirror, my hair had been light blue. Now it was a sort of light brown with an even lighter green fading at the edges. My eyes seemed...livelier, without the tears and exhaustion plaguing them. My skin, even though I hadn't been outside for more than ten minutes in months, was clear and no longer sweaty and pale. I didn't look unhappy anymore. I looked like a normal human being.

"You started looking a lot better when you quit your job," Jordan said quietly, chin resting on my shoulder as he stared at me in the mirror. "Bet the lack of alcohol helped too, hm? You'll look even better when we go to London, it's really sunny there right now. Might even get a tan while we're there. You did say you wanted to go earlier didn't you? I rented out the hotel room a little earlier and booked our stay longer-"

"You took that seriously?" I asked him distractedly, still staring at my new appearance. When did I get an ass? I've never had an ass before, it's always been kinda flat...

"Of course. It might do me some good to stay somewhere else awhile, staying cooped up in here all the time probably isn't healthy."

I turned to the side a little to take in more of myself. My thighs were cute, they were cute! When did I start getting cute thighs? How long have I had them? And where the hell did toned arms come from? Have I been secretly working out in my sleep? Wait a second, have I grown an inch?

"We should both get haircuts before we go to London, just in case we can't find any good stylists while we're-"

"When the hell did I become sexy? And why have you never told me?!"

"Well I assumed you knew, you have so much confidence that I didn't even notice you were avoiding mirrors. I mean you were sexy all along Tom, you're just a lot sexier now that you've eased up on the drinking and stressful stuff."

"But...you helped me with that. You're the reason why I look normal now."

He shrugged, smiling shyly. "You had it in you, you just needed some inspiration."

"Alright alright, I get the whole complexion things and the other parts but when did I get such toned thighs and arms? Like, did you slip me pills in my sleep or something?"

"Think about it. The last few times we've...well, you know...the last few times we've had some fun, you were always carrying me or lifting me or doing something that required some workout in it. No wonder you look so toned now."

Wow. I was losing weight and gaining muscles without even realizing it.

"I guess I should thank you," I muttered, staring into my eyes in amazement.

"No need, you did it yourself. Ready to go?"

"Where are we going?"

"Places. Let's go!"

~

I was expecting him to take me to the park, maybe a fancy restaurant or something nice like that. I didn't expect him to pull in the parking lot of a beauty salon, a beauty salon called Golden Curls especially. When he stopped the car and retrieved his keys, I shot him an are you serious look and nudged my head towards the sign. He let out an exasperated sigh.

"Look, we need haircuts and this place charges really cheap for them. You're always being mean to me for spending too much money, I thought you'd be okay with it."

"This is a girl salon," I dead panned. "You're making me go to a girl salon."

"Anyone can come here. I'm friends with the manager, she gets lots of guys who come in here. Are you coming or what?" He clicked off his seat belt and hopped out, slamming the door behind him. I huffed, but reluctantly followed him out of the car. What guy comes to this salon? The sign was pink and covered in thirty pounds of glitter, the places windows were made of purple stain glass, and there were pink and purple flowers growing up from the flower beds next to the doors and windows. I felt like gagging. I looked over at Jordan to capture his reaction to the atrocious pink catastrophe, but he seemed to be in a happy trance by it.

And then I realized what kind of guys came here.

Jordan dragged my struggling self in by the arm and once inside, he blocked the door so I couldn't leave. The first thing I smelt was gallons and gallons of perfume, like the whole place had been soaked in it. The floor was white tile with glitter imbedded in it and the walls were, you guessed it, pink and purple. There were girls already chatting when we walked in, three girls in arm chairs and two in waiting chairs. There was only one guy in the entire place, but I didn't let my eyes stay on him for long. He was already checking me out head to toe, a flirtatious smile on his face. I stared ahead and kept close to Jordans side.

A woman standing up looked over at us as we approached, but everyone else was well immersed in a conversation that was going a hundred miles an hour. Do girls speak in tongue when they're gossiping? Or in a different language?

"Hey Jordan, have you come for a cut?" The woman who was standing smiled. She looked very...interesting. I could tell she was the one who designed the place, her whole outfit consisted of one thing: purple. She wore a purple and black sweater dress with black heels, had the darkest violet lipstick I'd ever seen, and her hair went all the way down to her waist. You can guess what color it was.

"Yup!" Jordan exclaimed cheerfully. "Hope you don't mind, I brought a friend. Tom this is Night, Night this is Tom."

Night waved at me with her free hand, the other occupied with combing her customers hair. "Hello Tom. Are you getting a cut as well?"

Her voice sounded dreamy and far away, like she was strung out on drugs or something. It wouldn't be all too surprising if she was, she looked as if she were in a different place with the way her eyes were focused on me. I smiled politely and tried to make conversation with her over the other ten thousand ones also taking place. "Y-yeah! Yeah, that'd be great, thanks."

Jordan snickered beside me and I sent him a glare right back. He took a seat next to one of the chattering girls and I followed in suit, not really sure what else to do. Night was still studying me closely with her dark lips pursed.
"Would you like a coloring too?" She asked in an almost sing songy voice.

Coloring? What made her think I wanted a coloring? All of the girls in the shop went quiet, a few of them turned their heads at me but most just pretended to look at their phones or magazines while they listened. I nervously shifted closer to Jordan in my seat.

"Uh, what made you think I wanted one?" I asked, chuckling.

She kept smiling and she had paused working on the girls hair. "You previously had blue hair, did you not?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you like me to put in a different color?" She asked nicely.

My first thought was a definite no. Color is expensive, the blue I'd put in almost a year ago was a fortune and it didn't even last that long anyway. It had been a gift from Josh for my birthday.

Jordan nudged my hand excitedly and nodded, but I furiously shook my head. "Jordan it costs so much-"

"First time customers get a discount," Night interrupted softly. "It wouldn't cost you much at all."

"Do it honey," the girl sitting in front of Night advised. "It's worth it. Stays in for a whole year, I love it."

"It'd make you look even cuter," Jordan sang quietly. I gave him a dirty look and elbowed him hard in the ribs, but in all honesty the comment killed me inside. There's no way in hell I'm skipping an opportunity to look even better in Jordan's eyes. I gave in with a silent nod of my head. Some of the girls in the salon cheered and squealed happily.

I turned to Jordan and sighed. "What's your favorite color?"

~

"Tom it's so cute! Can I touch it?!" I couldn't even get an answer out before Jordans hands attacked my now extremely purple hair. Purple. Of course he chose purple, the color that stood out the most anywhere. I look like a damn troll now.

"Can we just leave the parking lot already?" I snapped grumpily. "You've been ogling at me for thirty minutes now."

"Oh yeah! We still need to go a few places. Wow...your hair is beautiful Tom." He went to reach for it again, but I hissed and smacked it away.

"Drive! You can touch it later, you're wasting daylight..."

And so he did. We drove for a few minutes until I began to recognize the familiar route he was taking, and I turned to stare at him. "Are we going to the Da Club?" I hate saying that stupid name, no matter how many times I say it. Couldn't the owner come up with something more professional?

"Yup," Jordan confirmed. "James is working tonight, isn't he?"

"Yeah, he is. And I thought you didn't like it when I drank. Why are you taking me to drink?"

He pulled into a free space by the front entrance, smiling to himself. "Well...you've been good. And I thought we could celebrate your arm getting better after what happened the last time you came here." He nodded towards my hand, which was still wrapped in its loose bandages. The wound didn't even hurt anymore, I probably needed to take the thing off before it molded.

"If I ever see those two weirdos again-"

"They didn't mean to hurt your arm, you know they didn't. Come on, we're wasting daylight." With a grin, he tugged his keys from the slot and slipped out of the car. He's already quoting me. I feel touched.

James was already waiting on us when we walked in, a smirk on his lips and a knowing look in his eyes as we sat down in front of him at the bar. "Hello strangers, may I interest you two partiers in some vodka?"

Jordan dry gagged. He probably would've thrown up if it hadn't been for the fact that he ate no breakfast this morning. "No," he wheezed. "Just the thing I wanted and we'll go."

The thing he wanted? Was this whole trip pre-planned? No wonder James looked like such a smug bastard when we walked in, he knows something I don't and he damn well won't tell me!

"Coming right up!" James sang, disappearing into the back room with grace in every step. He returned moments later with a picnic basket and a blanket and handed the items to Jordan, who smiled graciously at him.

"Thanks! C'mon Tom, we've got more places to go."

I didn't move, glaring between him and the basket suspiciously "Y'know, I don't like surprises."

He rolled his eyes. "Shut up. Let's go, you'll love what I've got planned." He hopped off his seat and headed to the door, stopping and putting his hand on his hip impatiently when I didn't follow.

"Fine." I slid off my stool and stubbornly marched towards him. "But if anything happens to me, I'm suing James too."

"Fare well love birds!" James called as we exited the noisy bar. I wrinkled my nose up in disgust at his words. Love birds? Is that...is that hinting at something?

Wait. Gifts. Picnic basket. Compliments.

Shit. This is a date. Jordan's going to ask me out over a picnic.

~

"We're here! I can't wait to show y-...Tom?"

I shrieked a little when he poked me in the arm, breaking myself away from my panicking thoughts. I can't go out with him! I thought we established that neither of us wanted that! Why is it all of the sudden he wants to go out? Is it because I'm heartbroken right now, and he wants to help me by being with me?

Escape.

"Um...on second thought I'm feeling pretty sick so maybe we should head back-"

"Tom please, this took me awhile to plan out. Just stick around for a little longer? We'll go straight back home after we're done, I promise."

I would've made another lame ass excuse and pleaded with him to let me go home, but...his pleading little eyes drew me in like an innocent fly to a zapping light. I was helpless to them.
Nodding, I accepted my fate. This friendship was nice while it lasted.

The sun was already setting when I climbed out of the car. We were at the park again, and once again there wasn't a soul to be seen. He's bought out the park again. The realization made my stomach churn with panic.

Leading me through the the white gates and the freshly cut grass, we made our way to an ancient playground whose parts looked more rusted and unstable than my heart. Jordan's hand kept a tight grip around my wrist as he guided my semi willing body towards it. Why he chose a broken down kids play ground as the spot where he asks me out, I have no idea.

Questions were running through my mind at an alarming rate and the more that formed, the more my head aches and my stomach roared. If he does ask me out, what will I say? No? Yeah? I'm so numb to love and letting someone in that I can't even function with it anymore? I'm so heartbroken that there isn't any way of fixing me, and if I break one more time, I'll probably have to kill myself?

I was so caught up in my own drama that I hadn't noticed Jordan had climbed up the rusty ladder and now sat atop the thing with the picnic bask sitting beside him. "You wanna join me?" He asked, giggling.

No. I really don't. I'm scared. Please don't ruin our friendship. You're all I have left.

"Alright." I climbed up halfway and Jordan helped me up the rest of the way, since the top rings were really dangerous looking. Once we were both on top of the thing, Jordan led me further up. We were on the main top of the thing, on top of a high platform that connected with two really unstable looking slides. Jordan laid down the blanket, sat down on the platform, and motioned for me to sit too. I did, reluctantly so. He began taking thing out of the picnic basket as I fidgeted around on the blanket.

"I wasn't sure what kind you liked, so I asked James to pick out your favorite." He pulled out a large bottle of wine, my favorite kind of all time, and sat it on top of the blanket. "He gave me Sonja's number too, and Sonja told me all of your favorite foods." Then he sat down a small plastic container of chocolate cake, a tub of sherbet, and...spaghetti.

I felt sick at this point. I'd watched Lady and the Tramp before, I knew where the hell this was going and I wasn't ready for it. I wanted to leap off the platform, break my healed arm again and end this date by Jordan being forced to take me to the hospital.

But I did and said nothing as he unpacked the rest of the things in the picnic basket. It took everything within me not to puke when he pulled out a fancy candle and sat it in the middle of the blanket. It almost came up when he lit the thing, but I held it back. I brought this upon myself. I knew this was coming and I didn't prepare or avoid it. The free living space, the free clothes, the nice gestures, the sexual favors...how could I have been so stupid not to notice it? He's fallen in love with me and there's no way in hell I can prevent anything now.

I ate my spaghetti separately. Luckily he'd brought an extra bowl, so I snatched it and the spaghetti quickly and kept my distance from Jordan while I ate. He seemed too immersed by his food to notice, luckily.

"Oh!" He wiped some sauce away from his mouth with a napkin and swallowed. "D'you want some wine? I brought glasses for it."

I nodded furiously. Getting tipsy would definitely help my nerves and clear my head. He poured me a glass and I gulped it down as soon as it was in my hand. It was quiet for awhile as we ate the rest of our food. That was until Jordan nudged a black remote I hadn't seen underneath his knee, and the whole platform lit up with twinkling lights. My throat restricted itself.

"Tada!" He sang cheerfully. I smiled a forced smile and chuckled weakly.

"N-Nice," I managed to force out. My hands were shaking but I was trying my best to hide it by holding my wine with both hands.

He sat down his glass and took in a deep, slow breath. "Tom, I-"

"No!" I shouted over top of him. "No, I don't want to! You're my best friend, I can't! After what happened with Nade, there's no way- I mean, I couldn't! Not anymore! What happens if we break up? I couldn't lose you, you're all I have left Jordan-"

"What?" Jordan asked, laughing awkwardly. "Tom...I-I wasn't going to ask you out, I would never do that."

Never?

I'd never felt so ashamed and embarrassed and hurt in all my life. Never? He'd never ask me out? Why? What's wrong with me? Didn't he just say weeks ago that he wanted to be with me, he was just scared? What happened to that?

"But the lights, and the candle, it really looked like you were going to-"

"I wasn't," he said strictly. "I would never."

Oh. There goes the last bit of hope for my scraped and shredded to all hell heart.
Sighing, I stood up from the blanket. "Guess that settles it then." With little strife, I climbed on top of the platforms wall and stood on top of it. Now what angle could I fall at that would for sure kill me instantly?

"Tom! What are you doing?!" Jordan squeaked.

"Ending my life," I replied drunkly. "Could you give me a push?" I peeled off my jacket and tossed it behind me. I wouldn't want to get blood on the thing, Jordan might want to pawn it later.

"No! Get the hell down from there!" Arms locked around my ankles and yanked me backwards, and the force was enough to put me off balance and fall.

In the direction of the ground.

"TOM!"
~~~

If you're having a bad day listen to the recorder instrumental of My Heart Will Go On.

I have been laughing for two hours. help.

Hope you enjoyed the chapter! I wuv u and thank you for reading <3

- Lee