ok so I think I have this major squish on one of my friends, like I don't really know what crushes and stuff are or how they feel but OH MY GOD do I I like this kid! like I don't want to date him, I don't want to be intimate or anything so I don't think it's a crush but I want to constantly talk to him, I want to be around him, like crack jokes and just be really close friends. I've had things like this before, but never this much, usually after a while my excitement over a person isn't very high, and i've only really known him for three months so the excitement might go down but right now, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggggggghhhhhh. 

like he's funny, and smart, and we share some interests, but like it's so fun to learn about people for me, and he's respectful but also sarcastic, and just is really good at listening to things, like, all around an amazing friend. like he just gets me. and I smile anytime I get to see him, like thursdays have become my favorite week day.

also literally a few days ago I learned that he is also learning German, and like I'm not good at it but I just think its so cool, and he plays guitar, y'know, because of course he does T-T, and like aesthetically, he's hot, like I don't want to date him, I don't like boys that way, but like idk, it helps? 

I just need to let this off my chest bc my irl friends don't really get my sexuality, like their supportive, they just don't really understand it, and I don't want them to make it weird between us, but I just needed to rant.

oh and just cause:

like, dude, it was the most perfect response i've ever reserved for anything. 

anyway, how are y'all?

I'm doing great :D

bye <3