A/N: So this one is written a bit differently than the last chapter, since this one is describing Roger's current state. You'll see what I mean (:

He wanted to leave, but simply couldn't. There were too many memories made in this house, too many memories he did not want to let go. Each spot in the house, whether it was the sofa, the piano, the kitchen, the bedroom.. It held a memory, a moment in time that he was truly happy. Now, tell me, would you want to let that go?

He stared up at the ceiling, tracing along the lines in the plaster, making little shapes. His eyes were focused on the ceiling, but his mind was a million miles away. He thought of everything he had gone through in his life, the good times and the bad times, trying to retrace all of his steps and try to figure out what went wrong.

He lost the love of his life, his sun and stars, his beautiful angel, and he didn't even know why. It all happened so suddenly, as if appearing out of thin air. The fights, the angry voices, one of them sleeping on the sofa. They never solved any of their problems, but he wondered, what exactly were the problems? What did they fight about?

Roger sighed as he interlocked his fingers behind his head, gazing mindlessly up at the white ceiling. His eyes were red and puffy, as they had been for the past few days, and they only time he had left his bed was to use the bathroom, get a drink, or eat something small. His health was slowly deteriorating, until eventually he hoped he would waste away into nothingness.

It's not that Roger wanted to die, quite the contrary. He wanted to live, but only with Brian. He loved him so much, and he thought these little arguments they had would blow over and eventually they would forget about them. He still didn't really know why Brian left home, he didn't know where he went, and he didn't know what he was doing. Roger went over again in his mind, the day that Brian left. When they had a huge fight and didn't resolve it.

"It's just one dinner, how is that a big deal?" Brian asked with an air of annoyance in his voice.

"This is the fifth time I made reservations and you come home 4 hours late! I was sitting here waiting for you and you don't even show up. You didn't even call to say you couldn't make it." Roger looked like he was going to cry, as this most certainly was the fifth time he was arguing with Brian in the past three weeks. Well, not exactly the fifth.

These fights about Brian being late only fueled the fire for smaller arguments throughout the day. Whether Roger left clothes on the floor, Brian dropped food on the couch, or even if Roger brought the mail in a few minutes late. If one contradicted the other, they argued about it. Then, of course, Roger would always want to make things better, so he would make reservations at a nice restaurant and ask Brian to be home by 7 so they could leave. Brian always managed to forget, coming home 4 or 5 hours late.

The first time it happened, Roger didn't think much of it. Sure, he was upset, but he decided to be the better man and let it go. By the time Brian was late the third time, Roger was beginning to suspect that his boyfriend was doing it on purpose, just to annoy him.

One will never know, though, if Brian was ignoring Roger, or if he had simply forgotten, as only Brian could tell you which is the truth.

"I simply forgot, that's all! I was out with some friends and I lost track of time. It can happen to anyone; I'm not perfect, Rog!" Brian's voice was raised slightly, and his eyes narrowed at Roger accusingly.

"Out with some friends? It seems that's all you do every day is go out with your friends! You never want to spend time with me anymore." Roger was getting a little fed up with tonight's argument, but he couldn't keep the thought from spewing from his mouth.

"Well, my friends are the only people I know who don't get on my case about every little thing," Brian spewed, obviously ready to have it out with Roger.

Roger simply shook his head, sitting back down on the sofa. "See what we're doing? We're fighting. Again. The reason I kept suggesting we go out for an evening was so we could resolve these problems, not make more." Roger's voice was calm and quiet, as he wasn't in the mood for a fight.

Brian on the other hand, was ready to go a few rounds with the younger man. "It's the only way we ever solve anything! Hell, it's the only time I ever get to talk to you, since all you do all day is ignore me."

"I don't ignore you! I'm letting you cool down, there's no use in talking when you're mad." Roger folded his arms across his chest, frustrated with how stubborn Brian was. Not that he was any less stubborn.

"I said I was sorry, the minute I came in the door. Isn't that good enough?"

Roger turned to look at Brian, angry tears pooling in his eyes. "That's all you do, Brian. All you do is apologize, say you'll do differently, and then you never do. You've promised me things, but you never go through with them. You've told me you were going to try to change, but you don't. And all we do is fight, I'm sick of fighting with you all the time, Bri, why can't things be like they were before?"

Brian shook his head, not wanting to answer that with things he would later regret saying, and went upstairs. He was trying to change, but Roger didn't give him enough time. They'd been going at it almost every night for the past few months, so who could blame him, right?

Roger curled up on the couch, pressing his face against a pillow before tears began to fall from his eyes. He had his faults, and he knew it. He even tried to correct them. But Brian? The man didn't even see what was wrong with his behavior.

Roger sat up, wiping his face with his sleeve when he heard Brian's footsteps coming down the stairs. His eyes landed on the duffel bag Brian was carrying on his shoulder.

"Brian? W-what are you doing?" Roger stood up, approaching the older man with caution.

Brian stopped and turned to face the blonde, but his eyes stayed on Roger's chin, not wanting to meet those beautiful baby blues. "I honestly think it would be best if I..moved out for a day or two. Three at the most. It's be good for both of us, don't you think?"

On the inside, Roger was screaming that it would be horrible, terrible, if Brian wasn't with him. But on the outside, he smiled a sad smile and slowly nodded his head. If this is what Brian wanted, then shouldn't he at least allow him this? Besides, how bad could it be, since it was only a few days?

Almost a week had passed since Brian left, and Roger had no contact whatsoever with him. There was no way for him to reach the older man, and even if he did, what could Roger say to him?

"'s all my fault," Roger mumbled to himself. "I wanted him to change so much. 'm just so damn selfish."

Roger sat up, his stiff back screaming from having been in bed almost a full day. He considered getting something to drink, maybe some Scotch or some vodka, but what good would that do? He'd get drunk and wake up with a pounding head and a sore body, but his situation would remain the same.

He needed his Brian.

"What did you wish for?" Roger asked Brian, as soon as he reopened his eyes.

The pair were on the roof of Brian's building, watching the night sky. A shooting star had passed and both young men made a wish.

"If I tell you, it won't come true." Brian grinned at Roger, passing him the bottle of beer they were sharing.

Roger took a small sip of the liquid, letting the cool drink slide down his throat before responding. "Tell me if it comes true then?"

Brian chuckled, a grin forming on his face in the moonlight. "Deal."

Roger sat down on the edge of the roof, letting his legs dangle above the quiet street. Brian joined him, only sitting a few inches from his friend.

"I wonder..if I jumped off, I wonder if I would fly.." Roger spoke in a rather dreamy voice as he gazed up at the stars.

Brian raised an eyebrow, taking the bottle from Roger and sipping the last bit of alcohol before setting it beside him. "I doubt that..you'd probably just fall to your death."

Roger smirked, glancing at the guitarist with an amused look in his eyes. "That's my Brian, always being realistic."

Brian shrugged his shoulders, turning his head to face the blonde. "Sometimes I'm not so realistic. I have my little daydreams, too."

Getting Roger's attention, the drummer looked over at Brian, their faces a mere few inches apart. "And what do you daydream about, Bri?"

Brian studied Roger's face, the face he always longed to see. "I daydream about my wishes coming true."

Roger snickered before turning back to face the night sky. A light breeze came, hitting the younger man's face. He closed his eyes and smiled as the cool wind blew past him. Turning back to face Brian, Roger straddled the concrete, allowing one leg to swing freely while the other rested on the roof.

"Tell what you wished for," Roger spoke, his voice barely above a whisper.

Brian mimicked Roger's position, facing him. "Why so curious?"

"I just wanna know." Roger paused before he continued, his voice barely above a whisper."Perhaps I can make it come true.

Brian swallowed, looking down at the cool concrete he was seated on. Roger held his gaze on his friend, tilting his head down to catch Brian's eye.

Brian, who started to feel a little uncomfortable about the situation, cleared his throat and swung his leg around, standing up. "It's gettin' late, I should go to sleep.."

Roger rolled his eyes, annoyed at Brian's nervousness. "Sit back down, May."

Brian looked to Roger with a pleading look in his eyes, suddenly wishing he were anywhere else than on the rooftop, alone, with his best friend. Who he still wasn't sure about how he felt towards. "I-I really n-need to go.."

Roger stood up, straightening out the collar of his jacket, and went up to Brian. He stood close to him, looking up into his deep hazel eyes. "Are you afraid of me, Bri?"

Brian wanted to look away from Roger's eyes, but found himself almost paralyzed by the blonde's icy gaze. "N-no.. Why would you think that?"

A smirk formed on Roger's face. "Because you don't want to tell me what your wish was. And plus-" Roger took the flap of Brian's open jacket and gave it a tug. "-you're blushing like a schoolgirl with a crush."

Brian nervously bit on his lip, noticing his blush for the first time. Do something, idiot! Don't just stand there! Brian thought to himself, internally smacking himself for getting into this situation.

So, Brian did the first thing that came to mind. He kissed Roger. It was nothing big, no major tongue action, no boners. But enough so that Roger would know Brian meant it.

Brian pulled away, a slight blush on his cheeks when he noticed his hand on Roger's waist, which he quickly removed. "That's what I wished for."

A smile appeared on Roger's face as he thought about that night. He remembered how shy and anxious Brian was, and how he was trying to not get turned on by the guitarist's every move.

Roger walked over to the window, wincing a bit from stiffness, and opened the drapes, looking out into the neighborhood. It was nearly 1 a.m., and the whole street was quiet and still. Roger wanted to go for a walk, since it was dark out and no one would recognize him, so he cleaned himself up as best he could and put on fresh clothes.

It was a cold night, but Roger only wore a thin jacket as he slowly hobbled down the street. He looked up at the stars, but looked away quickly as they reminded him of Brian. As a matter of fact, it was hard for Roger to find something that didn't remind him of the man he loved. Brian was everywhere. All over their house, in the blue lawn chair in their yard, on the sidewalk where he and Roger had taken countless walks. Hell, even the jacket Roger wore belonged to Brian. No matter what, he couldn't get away from the man who held the keys to his heart.

Roger found himself, of all places, at Brian's old building. People still lived in the small, cramped flats, but it had an air of loneliness since Brian had left. Roger entered the warm building and climbed the steps up to the roof. Shivering a bit as a cold breeze hit his face, Roger approached the edge.

Sitting down, with his legs dangling over the side, Roger didn't bother to stop the tears from escaping his eyes. He watched as each salty drop fell down seven stories to the street below.

Roger sniffled, wiping his face with his sleeve. "What the hell am I doing here? Why can't I just accept the fact that he doesn't want me anymore?" Looking up at the stars, Roger shook his head. "Stupid stars, you never made my wish came true. Sure, you make Brian's come true, but mine you just ignore. All I asked was that he be mine forever."

Roger looked back down at his lap, taking a shaky breath before looking out at the rooftop across the street. A tiny smirk formed on his lips as he spoke his next words. "I wonder if I jumped off..if I would fly."