XXI.

Just as I came out of the cafe, something suddenly dawned to me like a realization. Tsukishima is jealous of Oikawa-senpai?

That's like, impossible. Tsukishima didn't even talked to me for a whole week, yet alone wanted to be friends with me. He told me so. So what's with this bullshit that he's jealous?

Why didn't I realize that thought sooner? And why am I still running after him?

When I turned around the corner, I saw Tsukishima and Yamaguchi's back in the distance and so I called out for their attention.

"Tsukishima!" I shouted which earned a reaction from the person I didn't call. Yamaguchi stopped walking then glanced at my direction, but Tsukishima continued walking as if he didn't even heard anything. "Hey! Wait up!"

I could see Yamaguchi's mouth move, he's saying something to the bespectackled male but I didn't hear it. I finally caught up with them and instead, I heard Tsukishima's answer.

"I don't care." I could sense the irritation laced within his tone.

"Tsukishima, ne!" I walked side by side with him, panting. Yamaguchi trailed behind us. Tsukishima's pace fastened and he didn't even spared me a single glance, his gaze was only focused on the way. "Why aren't you talking to me?" I continued to ask him but then he put on his white headphones, completely ignoring my presence. I got pissed off and so, I stood in front of him, blocking his way. He stopped then gave me a sharp glare.

"Get out of my way, Mikazuki-san." Tsukishima said with controlled anger.

I shook my head, "What's wrong with you?" I demanded, getting infected with his irritation as well.

He raised an eyebrow then let out a sarcastic chuckle, "Why do you care? We're not friends, remember? Go back to your beloved senpai." He emphasized the word as if it was poison in his mouth. He passed by me and he didn't stop walking even when I spoke once again.

"Is that why you didn't talked to me for a whole week?"

I exhaled, turned around and snatched his headphones down, making it rest on his neck.

"Hey!" He complained.

"Talk to me, you jerk face!" I shouted at him, losing my temper.

"What for?! What is there a need to talk about?!" He shouted back at me, his voice just as intense.

"What's your problem?!"

"My problem?!" He looked at me as if I had said something so infuriating. "You! You're my problem!" He bellowed at the top of his lungs.

My eyes widened in disbelief as I pointed at myself. "Me? How come?! I didn't even do anything!"

"Didn't do anything? Are you really that dense, Kinomi?!"

"Um... guys, the neighborhood can hear you..." Yamaguchi interjected with a small voice which switched our heated gazes at the freckled male, making him flinch.

"Shut up, Yamaguchi!" Tsukishima and I shouted in unison.

"Don't shout at him, you jerk face!"

"I can shout at him whenever the hell I want to!"

"What are you so angry about?! You seriously don't make sense at all!"

"It's you who's not making sense!" He emphasized as his gaze became even more intense and I'm sure mine was, too. "I didn't even do anything to hurt you yet you didn't want me in your life while you welcome the guy who broke your heart with open arms! God, Kinomi! You are so infuriating!"

"What?" I let out a sarcastic chuckle, "Who wants to be in my life, really?"

"The hell I do!"

"Oh please, Tsukishima!" I said in disbelief. "I'm doing you a favor, you don't want to!"

"What about that bastard then?!"

"So what?! Are you jealous of Oikawa-senpai, Tsukishima?"

He took a step closer to me, his figure towering over me, making me feel a little intimidated by his intense stare. Our bodies were only a few inches apart. I looked up to meet with his gaze. "What if I am jealous?" My eyes widened at his confession, I didn't expect that. "What are you gonna do about it?" He asked in a dark velvety voice.

"You're ridiculous." I shook my head then attempted to take a step back to ease the thick tension between us but then he held me firmly by the wrist, preventing me from doing so.

"I know that you didn't want it to be me." His grasp became gentle along with his voice as his hand lowered to my hand, I could feel the warmth surging on his palm. He averted his gaze from me. "I know that you're tired of being hurt. I can't promise you that I wouldn't hurt you and I don't know if I'm even worth the pain..."

"Tsukishima... what on earth are you talking about?" I asked as I felt my heart tremble and skip a beat every so often at his statements. I don't know why but I'm starting to feel afraid of his actions and the feeling of his warm hand holding mine wasn't helping either.

He took in a deep breath and let it all out before staring into my eyes. "Kinomi, I love you."

My breath hitched at those toxic words. Oh how I've wanted to hear those words for a very long time but I didn't expect to hear those words from Tsukishima Kei. From the person I disliked the most; from the person who disliked me; from the person who didn't want to be my friend.

I realized that I had stopped breathing, and the only thing I'm thinking was how I could stop the tears from starting to film my eyes.

I retrieved my hand, I couldn't contain my tears anymore so I let them fall freely past my cheeks, and it confused him.

"Please don't say that..." I covered my face with both of my hands and cried. "Please..."

"But I do," He affirmed, thinking that I didn't believed him. He tried to pry my hands off my face, "Please don't cry..." He held both of my hands and I looked up at him through my blurred vision.

I shook my head, "You can't be in love with me, Tsukishima," I said, trying to retrieve my hands from his grasp but he wouldn't let go. "We can be friends... I'm sorry, you can't love me."

"I already told you, I don't want to be your friend... you can't possibly be just friends with the person you're in love with."

I shook my head, "No... no..." With all of my strength, I retrieved my hands from him and ran away from him.

"Mikazuki-san!" Yamaguchi called out, I had even forgotten that he was also with us.

"Let her go, Yamaguchi..."

Tsukishima is in love with me. He loves me, even all of my imperfections. A ridiculous joke, a completely ridiculous joke. I haven't even shared half of my flaws. So, will he still love me despite of it all? Will he still love me even if he knew how much of a dysfunctional person I am?

I came home to my mother crying and before she could ask me what was wrong, I ran to my room and locked the door on her. Mom continued to knock on my door, her worried voice and the continuous banging on the door was all I could hear aside from my faint sobs.

"I'm sorry, Kinomi, it's all my fault you're suffering." Mom, after a while of reaching out to me, finally stopped banging on the door and said that statement.

I stopped crying then sat up, staring at the closed door, waiting for her next words.

"It's my fault you don't want to trust again, why you don't want to trust people with your heart... thinking that they'd only play with it and leave right after they're done."

I stood up and walked towards the door, resting a palm on the wooden barrier between me and my mother.

"But baby, you're also denying yourself happiness with what you are now. And that's the last thing that I want to happen. I'm telling you, there's no such thing as people who wouldn't hurt you because they will hurt you sooner or later and it's inevitable," she paused after a while. "...so, Kinomi, go for the person who's worth all the pain."

I opened the door and saw her tear-stained face smiling gently at me. My lips curled up into a smile in return then pulled her into a tight embrace.