XVIII.

"I don't even want to be your friend anyway."

Those were the last words he had said to me before he left and we haven't talked ever since. School, club and work prevented us from doing so. Although it benefitted me and it looked like it was nothing to him, for the both of us, I suppose...

I think... I hope... I wish.

It was already past six in the evening when I arrived home from work. Exhausted, mentally and physically and ready to wash it all off with a nice shower and some peaceful sleep. But I was rather beyond confused and startled when I found out that my front door was unlocked when I always made sure to keep the doors and windows locked whenever I leave the apartment, which was all the time.

My heart pounded at the thought of someone else's presence in the apartment besides mine, and my hands instinctively fished out for the pepper spray I had in my bag. I quietly slid inside the apartment and focused in hopes that I won't hear some noises around the four beige walls of my small apartment. My mouth parted as I heard familiar voices against the wall I was hidden, like they are just talking casually.

"You should have really called her first. You know she's not ready to see you yet." I heard a feminine voice chastise, not even bothering to hide the irritation laced in her tone.

"But I'd already given her so much time already. I missed my daughter so much, Tora-chan." Another voice retorted with a sad tone, and my heart constricted at the familiarity of it. "I know I had never been a good mother to her and I at least want to make it up to her."

Tora sighed, "You know it's not that easy, you know... what you want to happen. She still hasn't forgiven you yet."

I could have thought that I kind of rather deal with a burglar right now than my mother but I didn't.

But seriously? Did I hear her right? Is she really going to act like a mother to me now? I survived for months without a mother, not that she was always by my side when we were still living under the same roof but...

I clutched my heart and my shoulders slumped in relaxation. I sighed as I turned around and sat on the raised floor then slipped off my shoes with a loud thud and thus, the heated argument of my aunt and mother subsided.

"Welcome home, Kinomi." I heard Tora's voice behind me but I didn't even turn around nor acknowledge her presence. "I'm sorry if we let ourselves in without your permission but Kirimi-neesan really wanted to see you."

I stood up and turned around to see Tora in front of me with a worried look plastered on her face. She has been pretty secretive about her reasons on why she had gone to Tokyo... now, I see. I'm sure she wouldn't go to Tokyo unless Mom called her. Why did she keep it a secret, though? And her timing was really smooth; it was the monthsary of Dad and Nii-san's death then.

To my unawareness, I was already wearing a smirk that made the frown on her face deepen. I just shook my head then walked ahead and passed by her. When I arrived at the living room, I saw the last woman I wanted to see sitting on the couch and an unfamiliar boy beside her. Our gazes locked and I took the time to take on his appearance. He has ebony locks, messy but in a way that is intentional; he has a rather athletic build and his aura screamed confidence and provocation. When his lips curled up into a sly smile, my gaze immediately shifted to my mother and I just couldn't withstand the urge to squint my eyes at her. She stood up upon seeing me, her hands on her belly and my gaze followed it, seeing as though there was already a baby bump, small yet conspicuous. Lovely.

My lips curled up into a smile, a sardonic one. "Hello, Mom. What an unpleasant surprise." I greeted her, "May I ask how you got the audacity to show your face to me?"

"I... I came to see how you are, Kinomi..." She replied carefully, looking at me as if she was trying to memorize every inch of my face. "I came to say that I'm sorry..."

My smile faltered. "Forgiveness isn't something you should demand... you will get it if you deserve it... although I doubt it. You see, I'm fine, Mom. I don't need your worry. You can exit the way you entered." I considered our conversation dismissed and when I was about to take a step away from the scene, the guy spoke which halted my motions.

"Wow, Mom was right. You really had the attitude, sis." I feel like my blood rushed to my ears at the last word he said. My head turned sideways to glance at the guy meddling and I saw him with a taunting smile which doubled my irritation.

My eyebrow arched with a frown which I'm sure it crumpled my face. "Excuse me?"

"Oh, I'm glad that you happened to be my future sister, alright," He grinned, which creeped me out. "because I have a lot of things that I want to teach you."

I gritted my teeth. "You don't know a thing-"

"I know," He cut me off, "I've been a part of this family long enough to know what I need to know about you."

I don't know why but I couldn't help but laugh without any humor in it. When my laughter died, I glared at him but his smirk remained on his expression. I gave each of them a glance and turned to walk away. Each step felt heavy and I felt relief as I closed the door behind me and locked it, ready to create my own world and shut people off.

I can't believe you let her in like that... Tora, you idiot...

My hate for her wasn't as intensifying as before. I could still remember how it devoured me whole and I even came into the point that I wished that she should have died instead of my father. Unlike before, I feel nothing but severe loathe towards her presence and I just couldn't stand being around her; giving me financial support didn't make her a mother to me. I used to think that she ruined my life... our family but...

I couldn't sleep even though I was tired. I couldn't feel at ease knowing of the fact that she'd come back to complicate my life even more. I'd already had other problems I couldn't put a solution to.

I shifted on my bed several times, finding a comfortable position but to no avail. Even though I was tired as hell, I couldn't bring myself to fall asleep after all. It left me at a thought that I needed to do something just to have the peace of mind. But before I could comprehend what it was, I jumped a little when I heard two knocks on my door.

"Kinomi, are you awake?" Mom called out in a soft tone. Instead of answering, I shifted on my bed sideways, my back facing the door. I shut my eyes tightly and for some unknown reason, my eyes started to well up. "I know how much you hate me for doing this to our family but I just want you to know that I loved your Dad... dearly. And I'm so sorry for hurting him... you."

Bullshit.

"You might be thinking that I'm lying but... I really do loved him..." At this point, she was already sobbing and the first thing that I thought was the baby... it's bad for the baby if Mom gets sad. "And it was the hardest decision that I had ever done but I didn't regret it, because I didn't want to see him suffer anymore. I'd made him suffer so much."

Silence. A sequence of deafening silence came after those statements of hers and I'd thought that she already left if she didn't talk once again.

"I love you, Kinomi... I love you both of your brother."

And that was the cue for my tears to fall. I can't help but admit to myself that my heart ached hearing those words from her, that she loves me and Nii-san. Even though the damage has already been done. That was all it took for my heart to soften, and in that brief moment, I remembered what and who I used to be, gullible, sensitive, and so fragile. Her love overpowered the hate I felt. I thought that Tsukishima was the only one who could make me expose different emotions but I forgot for a moment that Mom is also capable of that.

~*~

"Osu, Kinomi-chan," I was shocked to see the self-proclaimed brother sitting on the couch, eating snacks while watching television. His beadhead's even worse now. I ignored his greeting and instead went to the kitchen to get a glass of milk. "You can call me Onii-chan, though." I almost spat out my drink when I heard his voice behind me. I peered over my shoulder to give him a glance and I gave him a look like he had grown two heads to which he winked at me in response.

"Ew," I deadpanned as I continued to sip on my milk.

He smirked, "I didn't expect my future sister to be a tsundere. But I'm pretty sure you'd be delighted to have me as your brother."

"Why is that?"

"Because I've always been a nice person." Now, I gave him a look like he had grown three heads. "You don't have to look at me like I had grown another head, you know."

I just rolled my eyes then glanced at the wall clock, signing ten-thirty in the morning then back at him.

"They went to visit your dad," He informed me even though I didn't asked.

"Yeah? Well, I'm going to go back to sleep so wake me up when I care." I passed by him but then he grabbed me by the wrist.

"But it's already past ten-thirty."

"So?"

"I'm bored. Tour me around the town."

"I'm not a tour guide and didn't you hear what I just said? I'm. Going. Back. To. Sleep." I said firmly and slowly as I tried to wrench away from his grasp but he didn't even budge. I'm not really sleepy anyway. I just didn't want to be around him. But instead of releasing me, he gave me a sickening smirk.

"Oh no, you don't. You're going to play with me outside." And with that said, he dragged me out of the apartment, holding his volleyball with his left hand whilst his right hand dragged my wrist.

I didn't have a choice but to entertain him. I gave him a tour around the area I was familiar with, which wasn't a lot to begin with. I almost don't even go out and on days like these, I'm cuddling with my bed, working or making strawberry shortcakes or cookies for Tsukishima as a thank you present.

Tsukishima... again. Fuck, I'm thinking about him, yet again. I don't even know why he keeps on crossing my mind and I seriously need to stop.

"Ow!" I exclaimed as the volleyball hit my head but not too hard. We stopped by the park and played volleyball. I refused at first but the bastard was persistent and later on I succumbed, again. I was kind of spacing out and the ball was just enough to make me snap out of my thoughts.

"You're spacing out, what's wrong?" He asked me as I picked up the ball. He looked at me, giving me a look as if he was memorizing my reactions, like he was a cat watching for the next move of his prey.

I rubbed my head and took a seat on a swing and sighed. "Nothing's wrong. I'm just tired."

He took a seat on the swing beside me, smiling slyly. "Eh, already? I guess you're not suitable for all night-"

"You idiot!" I exclaimed and threw the volleyball at him but he caught it without any effort. He just chuckled amusedly at my reaction. I can't believe this guy!

"You remind me of someone."

I squinted my eyes at him. "Who that might be?"

"You remind me of Eira," He told me, "but unlike you, she's a complete sweetheart." I gave him a sour look.

"Your girlfriend?"

His smile slightly faltered and he averted his gaze, sighing exasperatedly. "Yeah, only for a week though." He looked at me with a grin but his eyes said otherwise.

"What the fuck?" I blurted out in surprise and I looked at him to see if he was joking or not and honestly? I really couldn't tell. "Are you a fuck boy or something?"

He frowned. "No, I wouldn't call it like that. It's just that... I was weak, that's all."

Well, that was awkward...

I don't know if it was just my imagination but I think I saw him wipe his eyes with the back of his hand but I'm not quite sure, his fringe was covering a part of his eyes but my thought suddenly ceased when he turned to look at me. "Enough about me, what about you? What's your story?"

"I don't have anything to tell. I don't even know what love is."

I didn't bother to hide the uncomfortable aura I was eliciting at the moment because I know that word too well. I'd explored the different faces of love, the part that's making feel like I was in a place where happiness only existed and there's also that part where you receive the pain just with the same intensity. I knew that. I knew that too well... and he also shared the same pain caused by love. I thought that he'd understand me; however, he instead asked me a question.

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Although I still haven't revealed the guy's identity, I'm sure you guys know who he is by now, LOL. Sorry for the tsukkiless chapter. Can you really believe that the next update is the final episode? //cries on the corner

This was the hardest chapter to write so far, to be honest. I haven't read any fanfiction of Kuroo and I'm afraid that I'd make him out of character just like what I did to tsukki ;--; but I'm going to do my best!

Shoutout to moonphasedd for being able to decipher the code! But Kinomi honestly has no idea what it meant, poor her. XD

It's like, 10:14 pm in here and I really need to get some sleep now so goodnight/goodmorning!