please don't spoil the book if you've already read parts of it :) ❤️
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Hoseok

"I bet you Jin's college tuition that she didn't get rid of the rat in her room." Jin smacks the back of Jimin's head and he winces while rubbing the back of his blue hair. "Stop saying shit like that dick head. I could actually go broke."

"But you aren't so I'm trying to help you go broke." Jimin sticks his tongue out and Jin throws a fry at him. I laugh and place the cigarette in between my lips.

"CANCER ALERT! CANCER ALERT!" Jimin shouts. Jin joins in with him and I roll my eyes and blow the smoke away from their faces. The two dickheads run around the table shouting on top of their lungs. "Wait like the zodiac sign?" Jimin and Jin pause and look over at Taehyung with crumbs all over his face. "Jimin get your fucking boyfriend." Jin points over to him.

Jimin sighs and walks over to Taehyung. He sits down on his lap and wipes away the crumbs. "No baby. Like cancer, the disease that's going to kill Hoseok before he can get some decent head." Jin bursts out laughing and I roll my eyes.

"Well if I die at least I die knowing what sandpaper feels like on my dick." I reply. The rest of them laugh while I stare at the college campus. We're sitting in the most popular spot on campus. Everyone and anyone was here but we were farther back. Everyone wanted to be front and center but we stayed in the shadows. Thats sounded way cooler in my head.

It's peaceful and it's less chatter. I met Jimin here my second year and Jin was my dorm supervisor my first year. I gave him hell because he painted our walls pink. Jimin and I became best friends after his girl dumped him when he came out as bisexual.

She had the audacity to share it with the entire campus and try to ruin his reputation. Beyond sick. He never ate or hang out with Jin and I during that time. It was my sensibility and childhood trauma that didn't send me to jail for calling her out.

I would never ever lay my hands on a woman. I wasn't like my father.

Then when Jimin finally met Taehyung in his dance class, he was smiling again. Not just a regular smile but that cheeky smile he has when he can't see shit.

"Hoseok when are you going to join a fraternity so I can ask you for weed." Jimin flutters his eyelashes at me when I let a buff of smoke out. "You know I don't do fraternities Jimin. I don't like doing club activities."

"I told you he would say no." Jin shrugs and takes a bite out of his grilled cheese. Jimin pouts and Taehyung kisses his cheek. "Can you stop being an introvert for once and help a frustrated friend out. There's no decent weed on this campus. You know it's good to release stress and it's prescribed for some people."

"Sex helps with that too." Jin smirks. Jimin licks his lips and glances at Taehyung. "Oh trust me. I know."

"Barf. Puke.Yuck. So cute I'm going to throw the fuck up." Both Jin and Jimin start screaming 'ooOoOoOoO' and hitting the table. "Hoseok, I'm telling you if you start rapping then we could make hella money." Jin points his fry at me.

"There is no we Jin." I bite the fry and he flicks my forehead.

"So if you need weed why not start your own farm babe?" Taehyung wraps his arms around Jimin's waist. The blue haired shorty starts smiling and I groan. "Taehyung stop giving your crazy boyfriend crazy ideas." I blow the ash off the cigarette. Jin suddenly freezes and a fry falls from his mouth. I raise a brow while I take one more buff. When I look I almost swallow the cigarette.

It's my fucking brother.

The most 'sweetest' and nicest child compared to me. The type of brother to give "tough love" because he's the oldest and thing it's his responsibility to take care of you when he can't even take care of himself. He'll never admit it though because he's too ashamed. The type you read in books and wonder when his character development will pop up.

He walks up to the table and I put my hand out before he could even say a word. I take one last draw of the cigarette before pouring my water on it and flicking it into the trash. I blow the smoke into his face and grin.

"Hello dearest brother."

"Hoseok. You're late. Mom wanted us at her office almost thirty minutes ago and I had to come and get you."

I roll my eyes and brush my hair back. "Well, I got caught up with some sweet, sweet sandpaper and decided to rub it on my dick and it slipped my mind mom wanted to see us."

Lies.

Of course I fucking remembered. I just didn't want to see her complain about how I'm a disappointment while she gives my darling brother praises. It's annoying. I don't think parents know that comparison isn't support. It's a fucking pain for most kids out there.

"Spare me the bullshit. She wants you in her office now or kiss your dorm goodbye."

Oh yeah. Totally forgot she's the chancellor.

I groan and grab one of Jin's fry. He only glares at me as I wink and ruffle his hair. "Jimin if you don't see me tonight then that means I dropped out and became a gay stripper." I pat Jimin's shoulder.

"In my dreams Hoseok." He grins. I scrunch up my nose and walk down the hill.

We made it to my mom's office taking the short cut. As usual it was huge, well decorated and nothing but fucking marble.

We sat down in her waiting room. Her own fucking kids in the waiting room, waiting to talk to their own mother?! Just saying it out loud seems sick.

Suddenly her assistant rushes out with her hands full and in a haste. "Paula what is that woman doing in there."

"Boy that is your mother you're talking about and she's discussing some medical things over the phone. She wanted to be alone for a while anyways." She said and stops by the counter to look on her bag.

I groaned already annoyed about this entire thing anyways. I could have been eating with my friends instead I'm stuck with my too-good brother and a mother who doesn't have enough time for her kids.

"Hoseok I know that look. Listen to me, don't give your mother too much trouble."

"Where are you going anyways?" I asked because she's been looking in her bag for a while now. "Date night?"

She chuckled. "More like a family reunion...if she even shows up."

"She as in..."

"My daughter."

"Oh really? Is she just as beautiful as you?" I ask with some seriousness behind it. Paula is a beautiful, sophisticated woman and has been working with my family for the longest. She has mentioned her daughter once or twice but never went into detail.

"Oh you have no idea. Maybe I'll let her avoid you when she comes to visit."

"I'll be sure to find her myself. Good luck and safe travels."

We say our goodbyes just in time for my mom to walk out of her office. The minute I turn around to face her I panic because her eyeshadow is running down. Her eyes are red and I can see the way her hands shake as she holds the doorknob.

Namjoon got scared because he walks over to her before I do.

"Mom what is it?"

"It's about your father."

***

Mara

I didn't bother to stay on the campus today. Jennie was beyond busy with her culinary assignment which left me with no one because well...I had no one.

I've always had no one ever since I was ten and my sister passed. I've never went into detail on my sap story because it would just remind me of those cringe novels I loved. My parents were nowhere to be found when I was younger so I ended up in this place I call death.

Sorry, I meant a foster home. A place where other kids like me didn't have any other place to go. I was one of those few kids who got lucky and the chance of happiness slipped from my hands. After the first three horrible attempts of a perfect life, I was forgotten.

It was sort of like a jewelry shop. No one wanted ever looked at the lost things, so they skimmed over it. They'll look at something more recent, nicer than the diamonds in the rough.

I, however, lived and fucking learned. I'm now twenty-five living on my own and paying my bills. With what job you ask? The only job I've been living for half my life.

Yeah, I hustled, robbed, and sold some bad things just to get a damn roof above my head.

What other choice did I have? McDonald's? No way in hell. I even danced on the side for a while to buy food to eat. The things I've done were only for survival purposes. No one had ever gave me a glance or blinked to try and help me, even when I begged for it.

I learned the hard way that not everything is like the fairytales.

I walked into the brick building filled with the smell of a New York subway. After living here for a while you get used to it. Luckily for me I moved out years ago.

"Hey Mory." I greet the homeless man sitting on the steps with his blankets wrapped around him. He gives me a gentle nod before resting his head back on the railing.

I make my way up to the second floor to make a quick stop to the rowdy kids I love so much.

"MARA IS BACK!" Jacey is the first one to run up to me. Followed behind her were four more kids taller than her. Jacey was the youngest of them all but bosses everyone around. Despite the dirt all over her face and the scars on her knuckles she had a mouth on her.

"Yes I am. You keeping these kids out of trouble?" I asked before stooping down and she gave me this look while her hands were crossed.

"They know better not to even get into any trouble." She threatened and looked behind her. I smiled thinking how much of myself I saw. That burning flame that set my mind on fire was my fuel and she had just that.

"Well what are we chit-chatting for?! We have games to play!"

***

After what seemed like two hours of tag and man-hunt I was finally going back to my house. I say house because it doesn't feel like home at all. I may be on the bad side of town but I want something better for myself.

"Yes Jennie, I'm on the bus and on my way home." I said into the phone as the bus turned and pulled up to another stop.

"You better be or else I'm beating your ass before the cops can."

"Why do you always assume the cops are gonna be involved with my life?" I said jokingly but also wanted to hear her answer. You see, Jennie is the only person I consider a friend but she doesn't know about my record. We met at a bar with intentions of hooking up but instead ended up laughing our asses off.

I only gave her my name and age. If I ever did tell her about my shitty past I don't know how she would react at all. Probably call me what everyone else said to me.

Heathen.

Disgrace.

Menace to society.

Every word in the damn book.

"Because where's the fun in the friendship if one of us isn't in a jail cell?" She laughed. "I'm not saying you're always behind bars but you make my life a little less boring. Everyday I learn something new about you."

I laughed at that. It was a genuine laugh, something I rarely do and sighed while looking out the window. "Well, there's a lot more you can learn about me." I stand up to let an elderly lady sit down.

"Well, I can't do that if you're behind bars so get home safely. Ahh shit I forgot to get the spices. I gotta go real quick, I've been drinking too much dumb bitch juice."

I hold on to the railing as the bus makes a sharp turn and makes it way towards my stop. "Alright, Gordon Jenné. Have fun." The call ends and I sigh now that I'm back to my world. Ugh, it was such a shitty place to be in my world.

I thank the bus driver before getting off my stop. The shit ton of plastic and garbage on the side of the road was sickening but you would get used to it after a while. The only thing you can't get used to is the alleyways. That smell was something conjured in the depths of hell.

I made my way into the apartment building and decided to take the stairs today.

"I know a thick girl like you didn't decide to take the stairs today." Brady, the doorman, laughed. I scoffed and slowly turned toward him. "I know that isn't the same ring that you had on your finger. Oh wait, I just remembered, aren't you two divorced?" I smile from the surprise expression on his face.

"That's what I thought. Tell the kids I said the child support ain't coming soon." I walked off with a sway of my hips and a smile on my damn face. When I make it to the third floor I walk down the hall, the usual neighbors fucking like they're rabbits and went inside my apartment before any old ladies walk out.

"What took you so long?"

"And a hello to you too Jungkook." I said and stopped in my tracks seeing him in his tank top and shorts. He just came from the gym. Nice. The hunk of man pacing around my apartment was the same man that grew up with me in my foster home. Correction, his family owned it.

It was puppy love, if that's what you want to call it. His family tried their best to help me 'fit in' but I wasn't budging. He was the reserved smart kid that everyone took advantage of while I broke every rule in the book. The thing is it's forbidden. His family is scared to ever see my face again.

However there's only one thing keeping us linked together.

He was my first. And not like the awkward ones you hear about. The kind of first that keeps you linked together.

I smile and make my way over to him ready to finally have a decent fifteen minutes or longer. He stops me with his palm when I try to kiss him. I'm shocked at first when I see he's wearing the his ring.

I wince and pull myself back.

"Oh. She's in town, huh?" I ask and brush him off. He chuckled and grabbed my wrist.

"And if she was? You never had a problem with me having it on until now. Someone catching feelings so soon?" The smug grin on his face pissed me off but made me feel things at the same time but there was no way in hell I was going to let him know that.

"Your ass must be jealous from all the shit that comes out of your mouth. The feelings I had for you are long gone."

Lies.

Jungkook only laughed at my comment. "But I know you miss it. Did I ever tell you that my parents had to put a tracker on me every time I was with you. I guess they saw my obsession over you. The lost girl with so much mystery." His face got closer to mine. His fingers gently tugged on the back of my clothes before his index finger ran down my spine.

Talk about fucking cringe.

Our noses were practically touching at this point and I almost fell victim to his touch. Our lips were so close yet...the phone rang. I let out a breath of relief and patted his chest.

"You should get that." I smiled cheekily before walking away from him. He rolled his eyes before going over to the phone. He answered it as I lied down on the couch bored waiting for him.

"Ahh shit...Um....hold that thought." he said. He looks over at me with his serious expression.

"What is it?" I asked.

"It's your mother. She's coming over to see you."

***

The sun was setting while Hoseok admired the orange and red tint of the sky. The cool breeze whisking through his dark hair as he sits against the large tree. A mile away from campus was his thinking space. I small steep away from the road, hidden by the tall grass with a tree and great view of the lake.

Hoseok would never smoke here. He respected the environment too much to damage it. Very contradicting for him.

This place was where he cried all his tears and let go of the backed-up pain in his chest. After all the heartbreaks, fights, and tribulations this was the place he ran to.

Hoseok closes his eyes and enjoys the peace quiet.

"Why couldn't my dad fuck Angelina Jolie!?"

Well, he enjoyed it while it lasted.

His eyes fly open and look at the other side of the tree. There he saw a dark curly head full of hair and a leather jacket. Hoseok didn't let that distract him from the curves the person has. He bites his lip and let his eyes wander at her thighs and right up to their—

"Stare much?"

Hoseok jumps and quickly hides behind the tree and hears the small crunching of leaves. The person walks in front of him now and Hoseok slowly looks up. His gaze locks with hers and his eyes go wide.

Her brown eyes look down at him and she tilts her head. The sun radiating off her dark skin causing her to glow. Hoseok can see the slight brown color of her hair from this angle as he stands up. His mouth opens but no words come out.

"Um—H-hi...um...Did you know sex positions beyond missionary is illegal in Washington, d.c..?" Hoseok's face turns red when the girl simply stares at him. She starts laughing and Hoseok can't seem to look away at her bright smile. Her laugh almost a happy tune as she wipes her eyes and giggles.

Then she sniffles and Hoseok notices how red her eyes were. She was crying.

"Uh—No I did not. I'm actually not sure what to do with this information. Are you normally like this around strangers?"The girl sighs before chucking. Hoseok nods and scratches the back of his neck. "That was my normal. You don't want to see me drunk but other than that it's just a different type of day for me."

"Well, my day has been shitty." Hoseok watches as she kicks the leaves and looks down. Her facial expression saddens as she lets out a shaky breath. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asks. She looks up surprised but then smiles.

"Only if I get to hear about yours."

Hoseok starts to feel butterflies in his stomach and his heartbeat madly. The two stare at each other for a while before Hoseok nods slowly.

"I would love to."

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this was waaaaayyy longer than expected