A/n: why does everything i write turn into domestic nonsense lately?? when will d&p stop being married all the time?? THIS is their impact, turning a poor emotionless soul like me into an ooey gooey mushfest.

Genre: Fluffy Smut

Wordcount: 7,298

Summary: Domestic bants gone wrong!! Looking at houses together turned into defiling their own house in Record Time!!

Warnings: facials, exhibitionism

"This one has a spiral staircase." Phil pointed out excitedly, grinning down at where Dan had collapsed across the floor. When he'd walked into their office half an hour earlier to find his boyfriend curled up under a blanket under the premise of editing, he'd only smiled fondly and decided to fall onto the nearby couch. He was still there now, keeping Dan company through the process, even if it was by distracting him every few minutes.

Their current distraction came in the form of the real estate website that Dan had stumbled upon a few weeks back, the damn site that had finally set the ball rolling in their plans to actually move on from their current flat at some point. They'd bookmarked more listings than was probably realistic, debating the pros and cons of each one before daring to book an appointment to see any of them.

The problem was that today the site had been updated with entirely new listings and both of them had stumbled across what they were absolutely certain had to be their dream house.

It didn't take them longer than a few seconds to realize that they weren't looking at the same house.

"Mine has a secret room." Dan challenged, looking so smug and invested in the banter that Phil didn't have the heart to point how distracted they'd gotten. Instead he simply grinned, leaning off the edge of the couch and bracing a hand on the back of one of Dan's legs to get a glimpse at his screen.

"You're kidding." After confirming that, yes, Dan's house did have a secret room that resembled something straight out of a spy movie... Phil had no choice but to retaliate with the big guns. He leaned back into his seat, turning his laptop to show off the high quality image of clean blue water with a prideful smirk. "This one has an indoor swimming pool."

Dan huffed, eyeing Phil warily as he leaned closer to study the picture. Finally, after surely spending over a minute looking for even on flaw to point out, Dan resigned to accepting that Phil's house did have one obvious pro. He wasn't about to admit to as much out loud though, would even go out of his way to try and belittle that pro with a thousand and one reasons why his house still had more going for it.

At that point, it became an all-out war to see who would be able to convince the other to see the appeal of their house first. Neither one was willing to back down though, and eventually they found themselves both rolling around on the floor and bickering like idiots between kisses.

"This one has a balcony." Dan giggled, throwing his blanket over Phil's face to keep him from retaliating right away. Nevermind that he'd already pointed out this asset once before, they were both running out of things to list that actually stood out about their chosen properties. Unable to keep the smile from his face, Phil didn't even protest as Dan clambered on top of him to sit on his stomach, hands braced on the flat plane of his chest.

"Mine has a tub big enough for ten people." Phil blurted the moment Dan finally removed the blanket from over his face, likely looking to pick up where they'd left off with their impromptu makeout session from before. Needless to say, the blanket was immediately replaced and rather than a kiss there was a long unimpressed groan in answer.

"We don't need to fit ten people in our tub." Dan grumbled, tugging the blanket away again and this time suiting Phil with an expectant glare right off the bat. He was practically begging Phil to try and come up with a suitable argument at this point, but the older of the two was having difficulty thinking of anything else to add whilst staring into the warm brown eyes looking back at him. They were filled with such an outrageous amount of mirth, practically sparkling compared to what they'd been when Phil first walked into the room an hour before, how could he possibly want to argue with that?

Well, it started with Dan leaning forward, moving as if to softly kiss Phil, leaving the elder to lie beneath him with his heart racing in his chest. He squirmed underneath the weight of his boyfriend, the atmosphere in the room changing from something competitive to romantic so quickly it'd seemingly given him whiplash. He arched his hips up from the floor, purposely trying to prompt Dan even a little bit closer.

In the end, Dan obliged, leaning over him with that same personable smile that he seemed to save for moments just like this one. It was so soft and kind, practically screaming the adoration they both felt toward each other yet somehow tucking it all into a neat little dimpled grin. Phil had tried and failed so many times to fully encompass how he felt with words, yet Dan could do it with that damned expression alone. It drove him mad in the best possible way.

And then, there was the moment it all went to shit. Rather then actually kissing Phil, Dan grabbed his boyfriend's wrists and pinned them down above his head with a hearty laugh. It'd all been an act, an unfairly good one at that, and Dan damn well knew it. He tipped his head back and giggled, keeping Phil firmly held in place beneath him. "Do you admit defeat?"

The moment was gone as quickly as it'd arrived, Phil's stubborn streak showing through loud and proud as he thrashed beneath Dan. Eventually he managed to dislodge the other boy, immediately scrambling to grab his laptop. He sat down on the edge of the couch, turning the computer around on his lap, well-aware that Dan already had looked at each of the photos enough times to have every detail memorized. He paused on the photo of the house's modern kitchen, looking over at Dan with a smile.

"See that luxurious marble counter?" Phil prompted, unable to keep from feeling like he'd already won the argument when Dan immediately lumbered closer on his hands and knees, leaning over to get a better look at the screen.

"Mm, it's nice." Dan hummed thoughtfully, looking up at Phil through his lashes. In an instant, the laptop had been shoved to the side and Phil had grabbed Dan by the collar of his shirt, yanking him forward to settle between his widespread legs. Dan swallowed harshly, eyes wide as he looked up, the smug act dropped in an instant and replaced by something far more coy.

It was during moments like these, when Phil caught Dan off guard entirely and the other man had to scramble to keep up with what was happening, that it didn't seem so far-off to remember this had once been the shy submissive boy he'd met online so many years ago. Now wasn't the time to get sentimental though, it was the time to damn well win this argument once and for all... even if he wasn't exactly playing fair at this point.

"I wanna fuck you on it."

"Phil!" Dan spluttered, shoving Phil's hands away to lean back and gape at him. A prominent pink blush had engulfed his cheeks now, one that Phil felt all too proud of putting there. He watched in amusement as pretentious, articulate Dan Howell stumbled uselessly over his words and refused to look him in the eye until he'd recovered. "You can't just say stuff like that."

"Why not? No time like the present and all that." Phil mused, crooking his finger and beckoning Dan closer again. He wasn't met with any resistance whatsoever, the light weight of his boyfriend leaning his head against his clothed thigh settling mere seconds later. Phil smiled, brushing Dan's hair away from his face, smiling fondly down at the flustered mess he'd reduced his boyfriend to. "Bet your pretty body would look so good next to all of that smooth marble, it'd look like something straight out of a naughty photoshoot."

"Cut it out." Dan whined, his voice going higher in pitch as he spoke, effortlessly expressing just how much he didn't want Phil to cut it out.

It was almost too easy to rile him up at this point. Not that it hadn't been at first, but there was a spell in the middle of their relationship where the thrill of the loving sex they'd been having had worn off. There was a span of time when tension was at its highest between them that it'd taken so much effort to get Dan to this point that Phil was left wondering if he'd lost his touch. It lasted months before the day things had changed, when Dan had sheepishly brought up the idea of kinks. He'd changed a lot just since then, even started to openly talk about them online, but at first he couldn't even look Phil in the eye the entire time they were trying something new or talking about it.

They'd come full circle now though, Dan was almost as needy and desperate as he'd been when they first met. It was almost better now that he was so much more confident, practically shameless in the way he made it clear exactly what he wanted. It made it easier for Phil to know exactly how to reduce him to a whimpering mess in record time.

"Hey, Dan?" Phil cooed softly, tracing the line of Dan's jaw with a single finger, unable to wipe the stupid giddy smile from his face. Luckily, some comfort came to him in seeing Dan was wearing the very same expression, though his eyes contrasted the softness with a sharp lustful glint. A fleeting thought passed through Phil's mind that perhaps he'd gotten himself in over his head with this, but he was nothing if not persistent during the few times he and Dan bickered over small things like this.

"Mm?" Dan hummed, blinking up at him with eyes that had gone suspiciously doe-like, feigning the innocence they were far from actually holding at this point. Phil smirked, leaning over and lifting Dan's chin so their lips could brush as he spoke.

"Do you admit defeat?" Phil purred, copying Dan's exact words but in a much more sultry tone. That earned him a rather unforgiving smack on the arm, if he was being honest.

"Oh, for fuck's sake, we'll schedule viewings with both houses." Dan huffed, spinning around and sulking back to his own computer.

Phil leaned back, deciphering the turn of events rather easily. He'd known his boyfriend for more than long enough to know exactly what the problem was when something was bothering Dan. He wasn't genuinely upset as much as annoyed, partially because he was bitter that he'd definitely lost the fight, but more than that he was disappointed that Phil hadn't followed through after teasing him with the alternative to fighting.

"That's all I wanted to hear." Phil muttered, perhaps a little more smugly than intended. Dan glowered at him over the top of his computer screen, eyebrows furrowed together menacingly.

"I'm not going to be able to take your house seriously after that, I hope you know." Dan's voice did a very poor job of hiding how obviously worked up he'd gotten over the teasing alone, though he seemed pretty convinced he sounded angry more than turned on. Maybe he did, maybe it was on Phil for noticing things that surely no one else in the world would notice, but when you've been with a partner for the better part of a decade you pick up on those things.

Just like he very blatantly noticed the way Dan had started to squirm, seemingly rocking back on his heels in a subconscious search for friction. Phil's eyes followed the movement, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip. He didn't want to lose control just yet, he was rather enjoying the back and forth bickering between them, especially when he was obviously the one in the lead.

Maybe he had a thing for the petulant pout that Dan wore whenever he wasn't immediately given his way, so what? He'd spent years showering the younger man in praise and giving him practically everything he'd ever asked for, the moments between them that could even be classified as disagreements were few and far between.

"Shame, I was being very serious about that." Phil sighed dramatically, tilting his head back to rest against the couch cushions, desperately chasing away the upward twitch of his lips as he tried his best to keep a pokerface. There was a long pause, presumably whilst Dan processed exactly what he was insinuating, and then a pillow was thrown across the room to hit Phil in the chest.

"You're such a kinky fuck, I don't know why I put up with you."

"Like you're not." Phil countered, chucking the pillow back in Dan's general direction. He was half expecting to have it lobbed right back at him, but instead the room fell into silence yet again. And so he was left to wonder where Dan's thoughts had gone from there, far too stubborn to simply lift his head and read the man's expression.

"You know, I bet you'd like to fuck me on a balcony too, huh?" Now that was just pushing it. How long were they planning on clinging to the idea that they were fighting when they were so obviously treading into different territory entirely by now? Though, if Dan was going to cling to defending his choice house, Phil would surely do the same.

"Mm, and a tub big enough for ten people."

"What about secret room sex?"

"Spiral staircase sex?"

"Touche." Dan giggled, finally, finally relenting. Phil sat up abruptly, grinning over at his boyfriend, the expression only growing more intense when he noticed the widespread arms. "Come here, you idiot."

He crossed the room in record time, kneeling next to Dan and engulfing him in a hug borderline crushing, laughing all the while. Phil pulled back just enough to rest his head on Dan's chest, sighing contently. Yes, their domestic life was so close to perfect that the occasional excuse to bicker or disagree on something felt like a perk in itself, but it was no secret that they both much preferred their signature closeness they were so known for. Attached at the hip, they'd heard it so many times and laughed it off equally as many, though there was a mutual understanding that that was exactly what they were.

"I don't care which house we choose, it's not worth fighting over." Phil announced, grabbing Dan's hand and holding it up in front of them both, weaving their fingers together and admiring his handiwork. Phil felt his boyfriend shift beneath him and looked up into his warm brown eyes, biting his tongue when his initial reaction was to point out those stupid signature 'heart-eyes' that everyone dwelled on and tease him relentlessly for them. That probably wasn't going to work in his favor though, not when he was trying to resolve their not-fight and make peace.

He inhaled deeply, careening his neck to place a gentle kiss to Dan's cheek. "As long as we're together, it'll always feel like home."

Dan wrapped an arm around Phil's shoulders, pulling him back the moment he started to pull back from the cheek kiss to properly kiss him. The distinct taste of ribena, the adoration that seemed to lace their every embrace, and finally the unexpected thrum of poorly-stifled laughter when Phil pulled back in shock at Dan's clumsy rushed attempt at deepening the kiss. That earned him another smack to the arm, though this one was much softer, and Dan's hand lingered on his skin rather than pulling away afterward.

Phil quirked an eyebrow, willing Dan to try and explain his need to take things from zero to a hundred so quick.

"Look, that speech was cute and all," Dan started, cheeks flushing the cutest shade of pink that Phil found himself absolutely enamoured with. "...but I wasn't exactly looking for an apology when I called you over here."

That was probably the one thing that could have pried Phil's attention from those rosy red cheeks, a dazed blink slowly gracing him as the realization sunk in. He glanced down curiously, the outline in Dan's boxers beyond noticeable through such a thin layer of clothing. Phil gulped, covering it up with a chuckle and a smirk.

"You're hard? Over that?" He scoffed, unable to keep from noticing the way Dan's grip tightened on his arm. Phil's eyes flickered upward, locking with Dan's much darker ones. It wasn't that it was unheard of for Dan to get that frustrated so quickly, it was just that usually it happened while Phil was actually trying to get him there quickly, not with a bit of harmless teasing. "I was joking!"

"You said you were being serious!" Dan growled back, looking adorably defensive as he folded his arms over his chest.

"You're gullible!" Phil challenged, though he was smiling again. Of course he'd known that this was surely the path things would take this afternoon, it was predictable by now that when Dan wasn't being actively productive he was more than likely being horny. Sometimes, when the tension wasn't quite as high as it was now, Phil would tease him about how he only had two official moods. For his own sake though, he decided not to play around with it today.

Phil hummed, shuffling closer so he could lean against Dan's side and settle a teasing hand on his bare thigh. It was almost like he was asking for them to be touched, what with his valiant efforts to never wear anything around the house but his underwear and a baggy shirt. Hell, half the time they weren't even his underwear, he would simply steal some from Phil's collection when they woke up together in the mornings.

Phil's hand traveled higher, met with no resistance whatsoever, even as his fingertips skimmed the bottom hem of the only clothing article covering Dan's lower half. Encouraged, Phil jumped straight to the man's waistband and slipped his hand beneath it, relishing in the full-body pleasured shiver that wracked Dan's frame the moment Phil touched him. Impatient as he was, it came as a surprise to literally no one when his hips jerked upward, trying to thrust into Phil's hand before it even had a proper grip on his cock.

Phil groaned, allowing his head to fall so he could bury it into Dan's neck and exhale deeply against the marked up skin at the base of it. "God, I'll fuck you on every surface in the new house, just you wait."

"Good." Dan grit out above him, the column of his throat trembling with the force of the breaths he was drawing. Phil grinned devilishly, dragging his teeth across the nearest patch of unmarked skin in the same instance he finally wrapped his hand around the base of Dan's cock. Something suspiciously akin to a breathy whine followed, though of course Dan would deny that vehemently if he was asked about it later.

"Balcony sex, huh? That's what does it for you these days?" Phil mused, beginning to suck and bite at any exposed skin near to where his head was resting. Dan wouldn't have any problem with it, he lived for having attention paid to his sensitive neck, would only get more worked up by the second if Phil kept up with his efforts.

Sure, he'd definitely have something to say about it later when he tried to film a video and had to pack concealer on over every last one of the hickeys left behind, but all it would take to settle that argument would be to add another to the colorful canvas of his skin and voila! Dan would be rendered speechless, or so far from speechless that he would cling to Phil and beg for more, but either way the fight would leave him quicker than should be possible.

Meanwhile, Phil's hand had set a rather steady pace despite the limitations provided by the clothing still clinging to Dan's hips. He stroked his hand over Dan in slow precarious movements at first, waiting until the man had started to squirm beneath his touch and whine in protest, and then gathering pre-cum onto his fingers to aid a quicker pace.

He clicked his tongue, remembering abruptly what they'd been talking about before and trailing kisses upward, whispering against the shell of Dan's ear. "What if the neighbors saw us?"

"That's, like, half of the appeal." Dan grunted, turning his head abruptly to bring their mouths together, not so much kissing as he was panting against Phil's lips. Noticing how far gone he was already, Phil pulled his hand away despite the slew of protests that followed. He brought it up to clamp his palm over Dan's mouth, silencing the other man before he could continue complaining.

"You want to get caught?" Phil questioned, quirking an eyebrow. He couldn't deny that he was curious, intrigued by the nonsensical things that Dan seemed to pine for as of late. You never could tell what would be the thing to set him off next.

Pulling his hand away, Phil gave Dan the platform to answer him.

"I just like knowing that it's a possibility, you know I'd never live it down if someone actually saw us." Dan explained, his hand venturing suspiciously closer to his lap with each word he spoke. Phil caught his wrist, holding onto it tightly.

"We don't need a new house to explore that fantasy, though." He pointed out, something dangerous glinting behind his eyes as an idea struck him. Dan gulped, rolling his bottom lip back between his teeth, just the right amount of hesitant despite how eager he really felt in that moment.

"Our windows are too high here, it'd be awkward as fuck to try and maneuver that." Even as he outright tried to sabotage whatever Phil was scheming in that moment, he couldn't deny how badly he wanted it to actually work out. He'd been thinking about this an unreasonable amount lately, how much the risk of being caught thrilled him as much as it scared him.

It was hard to tell at first, but as a smirk unfolded across Phil's features, it was clear that what Dan had said didn't interfere with his idea whatsoever. Dan couldn't even try to conceal the pleased little whimper that left his lips at that.

"Come here." Phil instructed, rising from the floor and stretching his arms high above his head. Dan nearly tripped over his own feet in his haste to follow after him, thankful when Phil grabbed his hand to steady him and lead him out of the room. Dan had no clue what to expect exactly, but when he ended up directed straight to their front door, he had to put up at least a glimmer of protest. He was only wearing boxers, after all, and at this point they left very little to the imagination.

Luckily, it seemed that Phil's intentions weren't to lead him outside after all, considering the rather gentle way Phil shoved him toward the door. When it didn't immediately click what he was supposed to do, Phil took on the liberty of physically showing him. He sidled up behind Dan, gripping his hips and nipping at the nape of his neck. "Hear that?"

Dan blinked, attempting to look back at his boyfriend, only to have a fistful of his hair grabbed and maneuvered back toward the door. Sighing, he pressed his ear to the wood and listened carefully. It wasn't exactly clear, but he could hear the shuffle of people moving about on the other side, and distant voices too.

"Phil!" He hissed, everything clicking into place all at once. He jerked backward, spinning around to face his boyfriend, only for Phil to press immediately closer and slot a thigh between his legs. Dan shuddered, a weak moan slipping past his lips as his head fell forward to rest on Phil's shoulder. This seemed to be the desired reaction, given the quiet smug chuckle that sounded above him.

"They've been going back and forth all day, likely something to do with all the renovations they're doing over there." Phil commented, using a painstakingly plain and thoughtful tone, not at all suggestive in the way that Dan was led to expect. He whined, unintentionally shifting his hips forward and grinding down against Phil's jean-clad thigh. This earned him two hands gripping his hips, pushing him back against the door harsher as Phil leaned closer again. "The point is, even if they can't see us, there's definitely a risk that they'll hear us. We're practically right next to them and they don't even know it."

"Phil, please." Dan managed, hands scrambling for purchase in the other man's shirt and gripping tightly, lest his legs give out beneath him. Phil leaned back, giving him an inquisitive once over, feigning innocence he surely didn't have the right to show after what he'd just indirectly suggested. Dan realized rather quickly that things wouldn't progress unless he made the first move and made it clear just how badly he wanted them to, the pleading words tumbling past his lips nearly without permission. "Please touch me."

"How do you want me?" Phil questioned, finally relenting and dropping his hard to get act, pressing himself closer and grinding his hips against Dan's. Already, red marks were forming on Dan's swollen lips from where he was digging his teeth into them to keep from making noise. Phil couldn't help but wonder how much more intense things would get once their clothes came off.

"Any way you wanna give it." Dan assured him, panting into his collarbone. Phil grinned, a plan already forming in his mind, hearing how wrecked his partner sounded already. Things had hardly even begun and already Dan was so far along, desperate for more despite the little teasing amount he'd been given, at this point it was no secret that he'd been anticipating this for much longer than he'd let on and Phil wasn't about to take that knowledge for granted. He was going to drag it out, make Dan wait even longer for the relief he was after.

"'Think I wanna go down on you, you never can keep quiet when my mouth is on you." Phil mused aloud, playfully allowing his hands to travel down from Dan's hips to grip at his ass through the sole layer of clothing separating them. Dan keened, weakly arching his hips out in search of friction. Phil paused, trailing his hands up Dan's lower back only to abruptly slip them under the waistband of his underwear instead. "Would you like that, love?"

"You know I would." Dan gasped out, throwing his head back so haphazardly that the resounding thud against the door sounded through the room. In one swift movement, Phil had yanked the pair of boxers down Dan's legs, freeing his hardened cock from its confines. Then, with all of the patience and grace in the world, Phil slowly sunk down onto his knees whilst Dan needlessly pleaded above him.

A quick pinch to Dan's inner thigh and abruptly he stopped begging, snapping his jaw shut and once again fighting to stay quiet. It was a lost cause, surely they were both aware of that already, but Phil couldn't help but enjoy watching him struggle. He liked making the younger man squirm, lose all of the control that he fought for so heavily in every other aspect of life.

He leaned forward, kissing the spot where he'd just pinched, lathing his tongue across the skin to soothe it. He debated leaving a mark here too, but he wasn't entirely sure if Dan would be able to hold off long enough if he kept up with the foreplay any longer. He shook his head, trailing kisses upward and pointedly avoiding the place where Dan actually wanted to feel his mouth.

He paused at the v-shaped dip at the base of Dan's stomach, paying special attention to it even when hands shot to his head and grabbed fistfuls of his hair. He inhaled sharply, digging his teeth in unintentionally harsh when Dan put more pressure on the roots of his hair. He couldn't really harbor any irritation though, not when that bite earned him the most beautiful noise yet. Dan groaned, low and guttural from the back of his throat, hips jerking forward and forcing Phil's attention to exactly where Dan wanted it to be. "F-Fuck, they're totally gonna hear."

"They better not, I don't wanna have to punish you." Even as Phil said it, he was well aware of just how far he felt from punishing. He wasn't in the mood to assert his dominance or anything of the like, but rather he just wanted to appreciate Dan. His strange zest for kinks Phil never would have dreamed of exploring before they'd met, his beautiful body and how comfortable Dan was showing it to him, even the weak little whines that sounded every few seconds when Dan's impatience grew unbearable.

Phil sighed, finally giving in and lapping his tongue across the head of Dan's swollen cock. He pulled back afterward, smirking and lifting his thumb to swipe the following pre-cum that beaded at the tip. He sucked his thumb into his mouth, lifting his eyebrows and looking up at Dan through his lashes, doing his best to seem sultry. "I'd much rather praise you, like right now when I tell you how fucking hot those noises you're making are. I'm so used to you being loud, it's so weirdly appealing to watch you try to hide it now."

"Stop it."

"Why?" Phil questioned innocently, winking as he leaned forward and finally took Dan's length into his mouth. He sunk down on it, hollowing out his cheeks and sucking him in earnest.

"You know exactly why! You know what your praise d-does to me!" Dan stumbled over his words, struggling to speak coherently while feeling Phil's mouth working on him. Meanwhile, because apparently Phil thought he wasn't struggling enough just yet, he brought a hand up to cup Dan's balls as he took him in deeper again. Abruptly, one of Dan's hands darted free of Phil's hair so he could curl it into a fist and shove it into his mouth, biting down on his knuckles to keep from outright yelling Phil's godforsaken name. Stupid tease, he knew exactly what he was doing.

And he proved it, too. Phil pulled back, hand quickly replacing his mouth and jerking Dan's erection in short, quick movements aided by the slick of saliva and pre-cum.

"I do. That's exactly why I'm not stopping." Phil responded brightly, smiling cheekily up at his boyfriend even as a clumsy foot collided with his leg. "God, I could stay like this forever, looking up at something as pretty as you."

"Phil!" Dan chastised, his voice cracking when Phil abruptly leaned forward and swiped his tongue around the head of Dan's cock, paying special attention to the underside of it. A loud whimper replaced whatever else Dan had been planning on saying, and for a long moment that seemed to be all he had left in him, before finally he spoke up again in a mere whisper. "I'm serious, stop making this something romantic, it's supposed to be kinky and dirty."

"Why not both?" Okay, in hindsight, maybe speaking around a mouthful of cock in an attempt to imitate a meme was a bad move, but if anyone would appreciate that it was bound to be Dan Howell himself.

"Great, now it's also lame." Dan huffed, trying to seem exasperated but only confirming just how much he appreciated the banter. Of course he did, even as he blushed like mad and tipped his head back, laughing loudly only to cut that noise off with one of an entirely different caliber when Phil took him down his throat again.

Phil didn't pull back to answer immediately, instead bobbing his head back and forth determinedly, using his hand on the places he wasn't reaching with the hasty movements. He hummed around the stretch on his lips, enjoying the weight of Dan's cock settled in his mouth and the feeling of pre-cum dripping onto his tongue. Whatever sense of control Dan had been impressively clinging onto up until that moment had vanished, replaced by breathy whining and unintelligible pleading for more.

And for once, Phil gave him exactly what he was asking for. He didn't shy away even as Dan started to move his hips, properly fucking Phil's mouth, hands tangled in his hair and body curled instinctively over him. He could hardly keep the smirk from his face, listening to all of the noises spilling past Dan's lips now, reminding him exactly why this was so much better than having a quiet partner. God, when Dan was close it was like he wanted the whole world to know it, or perhaps it felt like the two of them moving together was the whole world. Either way, they could pretty much bet on a noise complaint tomorrow and Phil was half looking forward to the sheepish expression Dan would wear upon being the one to receive it.

As Dan's movements grew sloppier, the pattern he'd rushed to build up losing momentum as he rutted lazily into Phil's open mouth, an evil idea struck. As Dan muttered something that sounded suspiciously close to an announcement of his impending demise, Phil gripped Dan's ass and dug his nails in just harsh enough for the other man to pull back. Dan gaped down at him in confusion while Phil swiped his sleeve across his chin, cleaning up the mess that'd been made of him.

"Romantic, kinky, dirty, and lame... sounds pretty fitting for our relationship, don't you think?" Phil questioned, beginning to giggle halfway through the comment despite his best efforts to keep a straight face. Needless to say, Dan was not impressed. Sweaty and panting above Phil, cheeks pleasantly flushed, cock curving against his stomach and shining with a sheen of saliva, and a pout on his lips to rival the gods.

"Stay still, you smug little fuck." Dan snapped, gripping Phil's jaw and coaxing him into opening his mouth again. He did, but by his own free will, and partially because he felt bad about working Dan up the way that he was. He allowed his jaw to go slack, humming in surprise when Dan wasted no time thrusting back into his willing mouth.

He knew when Dan was about to come, by now it'd be more surprising if he couldn't tell. From the way his toes curled, to the way his noises steadily rose in pitch to the point they were hardly noises at all but rather breathy whines, and the unforgiving grip on any part of Phil he could even come close to reaching that only seemed to grow tighter with each passing second. When Dan fell over the edge, he fell hard, he fell loudly and unabashedly. "Jesus Christ, fuck, that's it!"

Dan came with a shout, followed by a long drawn-out moan as he spilled into Phil's mouth. He jerked forward, tugging on Phil's hair whenever he so much as tried to shift his head, keeping himself pressed to the back of Phil's throat as he climaxed. He shuddered with the force of it, whimpers replacing the loud moan as the aftershocks settled within him.

Phil pulled back eventually, after Dan had gone limp and made no move of pulling out himself, and swallowed down whatever he hadn't been able to around the stretch. He watched as Dan leaned back against the door and slid down it, sitting on his knees across from him.

"That was hot." Phil sighed, leaning back on his ankles and dropping a hand to the front of his jeans. He unbuttoned them in record time, managing to shimmy free with a few failing kicks, leaving Dan to pant against the door and slowly recover from his orgasm on his own. When Phil joined him again, shuffling closer and bracing his hands on Dan's thighs to lean over and peck him on the lips, he'd ditched his jeans and shirt entirely. "The worst attempt at holding in your noises I've heard yet, but hot."

"You were fulfilling my current number one fantasy, cut me some slack!" Dan managed, seemingly very disoriented until he'd started speaking. He jerked away from Phil then, his cheeks suddenly aflame and something akin to mortification in his eyes. "Oh God, they totally heard."

"Good thing we're moving soon, hm?" Phil snickered, leaning closer again to kiss at Dan's jawline, steadily making his way down his neck. He pulled aside the collar of Dan's shirt, grimacing at the fact he was even still wearing it at all, and then dipped his tongue into the man's collarbone.

"You're the worst." Dan sighed out, sounding beyond spent as he slumped back against the door behind him entirely. Phil smiled against his skin, pressing a final lingering kiss there before pulling away to get to his feet. At this point he was achingly hard, though he'd never had half the problem with being patient and being edged that Dan seemed to, if anything the build-up made it better for him.

Once to his feet, Phil leaned over Dan and braced himself against the door with one arm above his head, the other arm dropping so he could wrap his hand around his cock. He got himself off with hurried, quick movements, having tested even his own patience with spending so long trapped in uncomfortably tight jeans while Dan writhed around needily in front of him.

"Oh, so you can be quiet now?" Phil complained, looking down at where Dan was gaping up at him with wide eyes and bitten lips. Like a switch had been flipped, Dan shuffled closer and gripped Phil's thighs, tilting his head back.

"Come on, give it to me." He prompted, opening his mouth and allowing his tongue to loll out. Phil gripped his face, intending for it to be a reassuring gesture only to have the message lost when he felt the telltale spark of heat shoot through his lower abdomen. He groaned, gripping Dan's jaw much tighter to keep him in place. His eyes fluttered shut as he moved his hand over himself faster, and then much, much slower.

When he came, he made none of the noises Dan had. He was practically silent, basking in the sensations as pleasure wracked his frame. He opened his eyes just in time to blearily watch as streaks of white shot across Dan's face, his release covering his boyfriend's cheekbones and lips, as well as his tongue that'd been left on display. He laughed tiredly in approval, watching fondly as Dan's eyes fluttered open to stare back up at him. "It's not fair, you're way better at staying quiet than I am."

"Naturally, I have years of experience on you." Phil responded brightly, leaning over Dan and gently attempting to swipe up the mess speckled across Dan's skin. He earned a grunt of approval, before it fully registered to Dan exactly what he'd just said.

"You were practically a virgin before we met!" Dan spluttered indignantly, swatting away Phil's loving hands only to immediately regret it when they didn't return. Instead Phil simply smirked down at him, looking all too pleased with himself, and then turned to head toward the bedroom. Dan scrambled to his feet, following diligently after him and grumbling all the while. "Dick."

"Hmm... maybe later, but I think I'll nap first." Phil responded, flashing a cheeky grin over his shoulder.

"You're ridiculous." Dan sighed, scrubbing his hands over his face, relieved to find that Phil had already swiped away the majority of the mess. "I love it."

He caught up to Phil just in time to grab his hand and tug him off course, the pair of them clambering into their too-small bathroom. Phil leaned back against the doorframe, watching absentmindedly as Dan clumsily started to wash his face off.

"I know you do." Phil responded, stepping forward with only the fluffiest of towels to offer his boyfriend, whether out of love or pity because of the bleary way Dan was blinking around the room with soap in his eyes, no one could be sure. Dan dried his face off hurriedly, throwing the towel aside haphazardly and collapsing against Phil's chest. He swung his arms around the other man's neck, pulling him closer for a chaste kiss. He pulled back soon after, brown eyes practically sparkling with adoration.

"I love you." Dan reiterated, poking a finger into the middle of Phil's chest.

"I kn–ow!" Phil yelped, realizing that repeating his earlier response was not the right course of action a moment too late, when Dan had jabbed the finger into his skin even harsher. Phil pouted, leaning back against the wall further.

"Say it back!" Dan insisted, leaning closer and getting right up in Phil's face. The move had been much more endearing when Dan was noticeably shorter and couldn't quite reach eye-level like this, but now he seemed to loom over Phil instead. Cheekily, and maybe because there was still a spark of fight left in him after their earlier bickering, Phil slid out of Dan's grasp and hurriedly starting back on route to the bedroom. It came as no surprise to hear footsteps immediately following behind him.

"You hear it every single day, aren't you tired of it yet?" He drawled out dramatically, falling back onto the bed. In an instant, Dan had clambered on top of him, sitting on his stomach and reaching up to squish his face up as payback. Phil blinked up at him in shock, feeling like something akin to a puffed-up puffer fish.

"Not even a little bit." Dan insisted, pecking their lips together before pulling back. His eyebrows were lifted expectantly again now and there was surely no way of Phil getting out of this one, so he relented.

"God, I love you so much." He giggled, tugging Dan closer when he was expected to push him away, catching the younger man so off-guard that he ended up face-planting into the mattress beside where Phil's head was resting.

"Yeah?" He managed, voice muffled by the bedding. Even still, Phil could hear the same shocked giddiness that was somehow still there each time he uttered those words, like even after all these years it still amazed Dan that he was cared about to such a degree. Phil nodded, rolling them both so he could stay propped over Dan. He leaned closer, supporting himself with one hand while the other moved to cup Dan's jaw, drawing their mouths closer and closer together, until...

"Mm... I love you nearly as much as I love those marble countertops."

"Hey!" Dan shouted, though it was slightly distorted by the laughter that had started to rumble through him without permission. He shoved Phil off, unable to rid the traitorous smile from his face. He looked over at Phil, glad to see that if nothing else his black hair had ended up in a state of total disarray during their lighthearted wrestling. He jerked his foot out, playfully kicking Phil in the thigh and then digging his pointed toes into the other man's leg. "I hate you."

"The feeling's mutual."