"Please, don't be mad, Sammy."

His voice. Sam would know that voice anywhere and she freezes. Her heart feels like it's just plummented to streets below them because it can't be him. It's her mind playing tricks on her. It has to be because he's dead. She knows for a fact he's dead. This is some cruel joke he's playing, somehow.

Maybe she really did piss him off. If he has her phone number and knew she'd meet him here, in uniform, maybe he knows more. Maybe he knows Jason was Robin and they were together. Their social media feeds were consumed with each other. It was obvious. Maybe that's what this is. Some mind game as payback for going after someone he wanted to kill himself or someone he wanted to recruit for his new crime family. It has to be. Because Jason Todd is dead.

She looks over at him slowly, seeing the green eyes that haunt her in her dreams now. There's the mark near his left eye he's had since they met. She memorized where the few freckles are and they match on Red Hood. He's the same height as Jason. His brows are knitted together in the same way Jason always did when he was thinking and pleading with her for something. The only difference is his hair. Jason doesn't have a white streak. So, it can't be him. He's dead.

Sam moves away from him quickly, putting her hand out in front of her as it glows neon green. She gains a scowl as she clenches her jaw. Not him.

"Tell me who the fuck you are before I melt your sorry ass!" Sam yells at him. She doesn't care what he's capable of. If Red Hood wants to play this game, she'll play right back and she'll go down swinging. It's not a joke and it's just cruel.

Jason faces her, eyeing her carefully. He knew she wouldn't believe him. She's smart. She's going to make sure he's real. But it hurts anyway.

"It's me." Jason states holding the helmet on his hip. "I swear, alright? It's me."

Sam shakes her head as she feels her eyes grow warm and the tip of her nose warm. Her eyes start to water and it's actually embarrassing. She can't actually stand here ready to kill him while crying. Whatever his endgame is, he has to be winning because her hand starts to shake and she swears it's not him.

"No...because I-I...no." Sam's words are rugged and breathy. "I found him." Sam mutters through gritted teeth. "He's dead." Sam sucks in a breath, keeping her stare on him. "You're. Not. Him."

Sam knows it can't be him because that's not possible. It's not possible that someone can die and come back to life. Bruce had an autopsy performed even. Even if there was a way, there was an autopsy. How can someone come back from that? She read the report, she saw the pictures. That is real. Can he survive being bludgeoned with a crowbar and then being embalmed? That doesn't make any fucking sense. And if he were really Jason, why wouldn't he come to her as soon as he comes back to life? Why would he become Red Hood first? Why would he go to Molly first? She saw him, cold and pale and lifeless with autopsy scars on a slab. This isn't Jason.

Jason's heart drops because she never should have been the one to find him. He knew she would. Jason remembers every thought he had before everything went black and he remembers knowing she'd come because she'd always come to find him. But, he was really, really hoping he was wrong and it was anyone else. It just had to be her. Jason doesn't know what the damage was but he has a pretty good guess it was pretty ugly and mortifying. It wasn't enough that he literally died, but it had to be Sam to fucking find him.

And his heart breaks with the look she's giving him because Sam has always trusted him. But right now, just by the scowl and vibrancy of the green of her hand, he knows she doesn't. She has to believe him. She has to.

"I gave you a necklace." Jason states, looking to her neck that's covered with the suit. "Infinity symbol, because it's you and me. There's a tracking device in it because you have a habit of getting kidnapped." Jason nods at her once as he manages his signature smirk. "You're probably still wearing it because you never took it off since the night of the gala." Jason gestures a hand towards her lazily and Sam swears the necklace starts burning her neck. "You picked out the hood for your suit. And you were always afraid of heights but grappling around the city has apparently helped you get over it. I have a favorite gargoyle. You and Bruce are the only two who know that." Jason tries to think of other things only him and her would know. He remembers everything but it has to be specific because just anything is never going to fly with her.

Sam pauses and she thinks Jason has to be the only one who would know all of that. Anyone would know about the necklace but not the reason or the tracking device. She never even told Molly why he gave it to her. She always said it was just something nice he did. No one would know she picked out her hood besides Bruce and Gar. And the gargoyle thing is so damn odd that no one would even think of that. But he did. But it can't be him. How can it be him?

"My favorite meal is pot roast which I taught you to make the same days you taught me scrapbooking stuff. My page was about Robin, of course, it was, right?" Jason shakes his head as he scoffs. The name of Robin is almost sour on his lips now. "Pride and Prejudice is my favorite book and I really like West Side Story, it was our second date that you planned." Jason takes a step forward with a sigh and Sam keeps her footing as her hand lowers just a little. "Krypto is your best friend even though he's a dog. You like Excellent Gotham which I think you like going to because you suck at making friends but you think Tim is cool." Jason grins at her as Sam glares at him in the way she always did when he was saying something just to get under her skin. "Hey, you said that yourself." Jason chuckles softly, looking to the ground and Sam's face softens just slightly. He always did that. "I dumped a bucket of ice water on you once, back in San Francisco." Jason lets out this laugh and he can't see it, but it gets Sam to smile under her mask. That's definitely his laugh because it's booming and it echoes over the roof.

"Asshole." Sam mutters as Jason watches the glowing start to fade.

"You ate the rest of my food! On purpose!" He laughs and there's this light in his eyes as he gives her this teasing grin. The one he always gave her right before she caved.

"I thought it would be funny." Sam lowers her hand. "And it was." The venom in her voice is gone.

"Yeah, sure it was." Jason sucks in a breath.

Sam's face softens as she takes off her mask and Jason sucks in a deep breath. He waits, nearly wanting to jump out of his own skin. He knows she's running every possibility through her head, just to be sure. He has to wait for her to land on this to be real and true. But it's agonizing and he can't breathe as he waits. But as he waits, he can see the disbelieve and what he swears was hatred, dissolve from the lines on her face. Her brows knit together as her eyes start to water.

"Jay?" Sam's voice trembles through the space between them.

Jason nods softly. "Yeah, it's me."

Sam sucks in a breath and runs the distance between them. She slams into him with a force as her arms wrap around his neck and this time, without hesitation, Jason's arms wrap around her middle. He holds her as close to him as possible as his eyes close. She smells like his body wash and shampoo and he can't help but smile. Of course, she does.

It's unbelievable. Sam has no idea how it's possible but it has to be him. No one else would be able to know all of that. Sam and Jason always kept so much close to their chests when it came to the two of them, Sam knows he didn't tell. Anyone. He wouldn't. It has to be him and she is relieved. She's wrapped in his arms again and it's like she's been sucked back home in an instant.

It's relief that hits Jason like a freight train. It's firm and hard but comforting. An easy breath of air leaves his lungs and it's as if he hasn't been able to take a full breath since coming back, not until now. Sam's arms are wrapped around his neck so right he thinks she might strangle him and it feels good. He was so scared she'd punch him and tell him off and leave. He died and a really big part of him, thinks she should do all of those things. But, she doesn't and Jason is just happy to have her with him, if just for this moment.

Jason pulls down her hood to get her to look at him and the second she does, one of his hands comes up the back of her head and he brings her lips to his. His hand tangles in her hair and he keeps his other wrapped as tightly as he can as if he were to let go for even a second, he'd wake up to relive another nightmare. 

Their mouths move together almost carefully at first before it grows sloppy and almost desperate. Sam slides her hands into the curls at the nape of his neck and she thinks nothing, right now matters. She can exist right here on this rooftop just like this with him. If they stay like this, nothing can happen. Nothing bad can happen again if they can just stay like this. She begs and pleads with the universe to just freeze time but the universe never seems to listen to her pleas.

"I'm so sorry." Jason mutters against her lips, his breath heaving but he keeps hers lips just hovering above his as if he's terrified to move.

Sam's the one that pulls away to get a good look at him. "W-what...I--" Sam shakes her head and Jason's heart sinks as he feels her arms loosen around his neck. "You died." Sam chews the inside of her cheek. "H-how?"

"Lazarus Pit." Jason states. "I don't know how it works but I was put in it and came out alive."

Jason knows he can't tell her much. If he tells her what's going on, it'll complicate things a little. Crane already doesn't trust her. And Jason knows that. Jason also knows she'll lose her mind if she finds out what he's doing, the whole story. He knows he can't tell her. Not until the time is right but she, at the very fucking least, deserves to know he's alive and how. The Titans will find out eventually anyway and none of them could go back and tell her. She'd never forgive him.

If this were any other city, Sam would say that were a load of shit. But this is Gotham where the impossible always seems possible in the most fucked up ways. It's just a normal thing here. Acid creating whatever fuck the Joker was. That same acid turning Harley Quinn into whatever she is now that's actually nothing like the Joker. Poison Ivy accidentally spilling a chemical and turning into what she is now. Insane scientists that torment the city with magic tricks and fear gas. Maybe Lazuaus Pit makes sense.

"Lazarus Pit." Sam nods her head once. "That tracks." She lets out a sigh.

"Yeah." A forced chuckle leaves Jason's lips as he drops his hand from her hair and moves it to her waist.

"Who put you in it then?" Sam asks as her hands find their way to his biceps and there's a trickling of anger starting to drip into her stomach.

Sam is thrilled and relieved he's alive and he's real. But, she's also smack in the middle of grieving him. Now, he's suddenly alive and it's not like he just walked into the manor one day. He's been out here being Red Hood for days and she's just now finding out about it. The relief of him being alive is still throbbing with her heart but there's an anger that's there, moving in slowly. It's as if her body is so used to being mad at the entire world or absolutely miserable that it doesn't know what to do right now. And she thinks she might be getting whiplash from the emotions. It's like she goes numb as her body sorts through which emotion it wants to land on like some sick arcade game.

Jason shakes his head, knowing this is about to go south. "I can't tell you." Jason answers honestly.

That simple sentence of keeping her in the dark, lets her brain settle on anger. He died and she doesn't even get an explanation as to who brought him back? 

Sam lets out this hollowed version of a laugh as she nods her head and she takes a step back from him. Jason's hands nearly linger in the air and he swears this is going to be bad. "Oh, okay." She quips. "So, you get to come back from the fucking dead and just not tell me shit!? That's how is going to go?" She yells at him. Anger seems to be the easy default emotion lately. But, this time, it gets to be at the person causing it even if it's not his fault.

There were several reasons Jason didn't want to do this. He didn't want her involved being high up on that list. He knows her better than anyone and he knows she's gonna dig. She's going to dig until she gets answers and he knows Crane won't like that. She'll figure it out. If she figures it out, she'll be in danger. He doesn't know what Crane is going to do or want him to do if she figures it out. There's also the guilt of it all that's chewing at him.

He feels guilty now. Now that he isn't high. He feels guilty that he left her alone. And he knew she would probably yell at him. He deserves it but that doesn't mean he wants to hear it. It hurts him to see her like this. To see her clearly wanting to walk away from this. To walk away from him. He wanted to avoid it all. But that's not fair and he misses her. And he feels guilty that he's been lying to her and has to keep lying. None of it is fair to her and she's always been the one person he can trust. She's always been the one person who offers him understanding even when she shouldn't. But, it'll keep her safe and at arm's length and he knows that. It has to be like that until it's safe. Her safety is still one of his priorities, even when he's high. That doesn't change.

"Look, there's a plan, okay?" Jason sucks in a shaky breath. "I just can't—"

"Do you think I give a flying fuck about a plan right now!?" Sam screams back and she knows she's angry and that's not fair either.

But it fucking hurts. It hurts so bad that she just needs to scream. She needs to scream at the one person who has caused her to hurt this badly and that's him. He died. He died and left her here alone to deal with it all alone. He made a stupid decision and it got him killed. He fucking knew better and he died anyway. And she's pissed about it. But, she stops herself there because everything she wants to say seems cruel. It all seems too cruel to say and it's just the emotions getting in the way because she knows she doesn't mean any of it. And what if it's enough to get him to leave and he dies permanently? She can't say what she's thinking out of fear he won't come back again. She has to bite it down as tears brim her eyes.

"It's fucking dangerous, alright?" Jason pleads with her as he watches the tears wet her cheeks. He never meant to hurt her. Not her. "I don't want you involved."

"And I just have to accept that?" Sam's voice cracks.

"Yeah." Jason nods softly.

Jason is begging for that to be enough. It should be. It should be enough and it would have been had he not died. Sam would have blindly trusted everything that came out of his mouth but then he died. And she doesn't anymore. That changed things.

He says this is dangerous and expects her to just trust him with something dangerous again. The last time he did something dangerous, he got a crowbar to the face by a maniac. It's as if that doesn't matter to him. That it doesn't matter to him that it matters to her. She can't handle being in the dark. Not again.

"Well, that's bullshit!" She yells so loudly it echoes over the rooftop. "You died!" She lets out a cry. "You died and you're back! I deserve an explanation!" Sam throws her arm out to the side.

Jason steps forward, trying to close the distance between them again,, wanting so desperately to pull her into him. "I know." He nods and the only reason he doesn't grab her is because he's worried she might lose it entirely. "You have to believe me, okay? I told you when I could."

"That's not fucking fair, Jason!" Sam barks, her hands balling at her sides as they start to shake with some lethal combination of anger and heartbreak. "You get to come back and be Red Hood and I just have to be okay!? You went to fucking Molly before you came to me! You fucking left me!" Sam's voice cracks as her heart thunders desperately against her ribcage.

He knew. He always knew one of them wouldn't come home and it would destroy whoever was left in the wake of their death. And he always figured it would be him because of his recklessness. But a part of him wondered if it would be her since the universe loves to torture him. But of course, it would be him because dying broke her. And her breaking breaks him.

"I know it fucking sucks, alright?" Jason raises his voice swallowing the lump in his throat. "I know! I'm cleaning up Gotham, alright? That's what's going on. I found Diego and had to bring him to her, that's all! I'm so fucking sorry." There's desperation in his voice.

"Sorry doesn't fucking fix it, Jason!" Sam sucks in a shaky breath as her heart breaks further. Why does it hurt so bad when he's alive? It shouldn't still hurt but it does. "It doesn't fucking fix it!" Sam lets out a cry as her nose scrunches.

Sorry doesn't make the last six days suddenly disappear from her memory. Sorry doesn't make it feel any better. Sorry fixes nothing because she still found his dead body. Sorry fixes nothing because it's just a fucking word and her heart hurts and everything hurts.

"I know." Jason lowers his voice. "I know, alright? Just--"

"No, you don't!" Sam steps forward and pushes his chest, every emotion flooding her system to the point it just needs somewhere to go. "You died!" She lets out a wail as she shoves him again, harder this time as he takes a step back. "It destroyed me!" She shoves him again but it's weaker this time. "It destroyed me." Her voice lowers as she rests her fists on his chest. "You died and it destroyed me and I had to fucking find you and I tried! I tried to save you!" Sam hits her fist on his chest. "I tried and it didn't fucking do anything because you were already dead! It's been fucking hell! It hurts and I can't sleep and I can't eat and I can't stop fucking crying and Gar will get me to laugh and I feel guilty. And I feel fucking guilty I missed it! Because you had this stupid fucking idea to go after the fucking Joker on your own! If you wanted to prove something, fuck! Take me with you, Jason!" Sam hits his chest again as she looks up at him. "I would have gone with you!" Sam shakes her head as tears fall down her cheeks. "You fucking left me!" She shoves him again but this time, he grabs her wrists as she lets out a sob. "You left me." Sam lets out a weak whine.

Jason's eyes glass over and he is so sorry. There should be another word stronger than sorry because even that doesn't feel right. He feels so guilty and he doesn't think he'll ever not feel guilty over it. He swears he'll always feel this heaviness in his chest, a burning pain where her name is still stitched into the flesh. The Joker murdered him brutally and he's the one that feels guilty and at fault because she's right. He shouldn't have gone and he should have told her. But, that wasn't the plan and this was his to prove, not hers. It was always about him with that one. It should have been his. And he's so fucking sorry.

"I know." Jason nods as he feels Sam's arms relax in his hands. "I fucking know and I-I don't know." Jason shrugs as he drops her hand. "I'm fucking sorry, Sammy."

Sam's body shakes slightly as a silent cry escapes her lips. Jason knows he'll never be able to forgive himself for this one. He doesn't think they'll come back from this. How could they? He might be alive but that doesn't change what it did to her. It doesn't change that he lied and is still lying to her. He always swore she deserved better and that thought has never been more true.

"I know." Sam nods softly and she's tired.

Sam rests her head against him sucking in a breath and she hates that's even mad at him. She knows it's not his fault. It's not his fault he was murdered. It was stupid, it was dumb. It got him killed but it's not his fault. The Joker was a maniac who took an opportunity. Jason got killed and that is not his fault and Sam knows that. It's not fair to put the blame on him because she's mad but she just couldn't help it. It all just came out like a volcano long overdue for an eruption. She's just...hurt. By all of it. But, yelling at him, kind of helped a little bit and she can't stay mad. It was always something she was bad at and something Jasn was always really good at. She can't stay mad at him ever but especially now when he's alive. He's alive and she is happy he is. So, she bites down the hurt of everything as she looks back up to him.

"I'm so sorry." Jason's voice cracks. "I never meant to....to die." Jason grits his teeth and that's part of why he likes the drug. He isn't haunted by that night when he takes it. He remembers everything.

"I know." Her voice is broken as she nods. "It's just...it's...it's so fucking hard, Jay." The use of his nickname fills this void in his heart. "And nothing helps." Sam puts a hand to his face and he almost pulls away. "I really fucking miss you." Her thumb traces over his cheek and he misses her, too.

Jason places a hesitant hand over hers. "I'm alive, alright? I never meant for that shit to happen and I'm sorry I didn't fucking tell you. Please, believe me."

"Why didn't you?" Sam asks as she searches his face for any answers while she drops her hand.

"I'm just fucking tired of the nightmares and shaky hands and being fucking scared." Jason lets out an annoyed scoff. "Robin isn't scared so I....I got some help." Jason shakes his head as Sam raises a brow. She hates the sound of that sentence. "And...I didn't want your help. I didn't want you to get dragged into it, alright?"

"I would have helped, Jay." Sam pleads with him. "You could have told me. You know, you can tell me anything. I'm always on your side."

Jason knows. He knows but he also knew the risk all of this would take. If he told Sam he went to Crane for help, he thinks she'd leave, even now she'd probably leave. Sam is understanding but she has lines and Jason thinks Crane would be her line. Jason working with him. Sam would blame Crane for him dying and Jason is protecting him. At the end of the day, Crane is helping him with the drug and the city. Crane brought him back to life. Maybe he's not so bad but he can't tell Sam that. He knows he if tells her anything more, she'll probably leave and he can't lose her. And the idea of her being out there with him that night, nearly sends him into cardiac arrest. She'd be dead, too but Crane probably wouldn't have brought her back.

"I didn't want your help." Jason urges. "It wasn't your fucking problem, alright? I wanted to do it on my own."

Sam offers him a subtle nod as she sniffles. "We're supposed to be a team. Your problems are my problems, Jay. I know you're thinking it, you're not a burden to me." Sam pleads with him to believe her. "But, I get it." Sam nods softly, chewing the inside of her cheek because she does understand him wanting to do it by himself. She gets it. "Why can't you tell me now?"

Jason's heart skips with her saying he's not a burden because he swears if she only knew, she'd think differently. It's all too much. She says it's not a burden but her eyes are sunken in and there are dark bags under her eyes. Her eyes aren't crinkling at the edges and she lacks the fire across her expression Jason always adored so much. This has been a burden. He hasn't even been around and he's been a burden anyway. But, he doesn't want to stand here and go back and forth about that. He can't stand here and do that.

Jason cautiously moves his hands to her hips and a part of him thinks she'll push him away but she doesn't. "I can't lose you." Jason states quietly.

Sam's brows knit together as if she's trying to hold back more tears. A shakey breath leaves her lungs and somehow, her chest feels heavier. "Yeah, but I lost you." Sam pleads with him. "You're not gonna lose me, Jay." Sam shakes her head. He wants to believe that so badly but if she only knew, she wouldn't be saying that.

"I won't risk it." Jason keeps his stance firm but his voice is still quiet and soft.

She still means more to him than he'll ever be able to say out loud. He won't risk losing her, not to all of the shit that's going on. He doesn't know what he would do if he did.

Sam lets out a sigh and decides to settle for the answer, seeing the look of desperation clouding his eyes. "Okay." She nods softly. "Then, what the fuck were you doing making a drug?" Sam asks him with exasperation but she watches him carefully. Jason isn't stupid, he knows how to cover his tracks if he wants to. If didn't want someone finding that formula, no one would have found it.

Jason's eyes dodge to the ground before coming to back hers. He left it out on purpose. He knew, despite the drug's false sense of confidence, there was a chance he wouldn't come back. Jason wanted her to know if he didn't make it back but by how she's asking, he can tell she didn't figure it out yet which is a relief.

"If you fucking tell me you can't tell me, I'm going to lose my shit." Sam blinks at him.

"You found it?" Jason asks.

"No, Dick did. I was a little busy ya know, grieving you to be searching your room for clues. Dick was a detective, he wants answers, too. So, you wanna explain that or?"

Jason shakes his head and he can see Sam at the end of her rope. "I can't tell you." Jason scoffs.

"Fuck you." Sam huffs back as Jason swears his heart is actively bleeding right through his ribs.

"It's to do with the plan." Jason states. "I can't tell you anything more--"

"Bullshit. You can and you're choosing not to. You can always trust me so it's bullshit. I don't--"

"No!" Jason yells back. "Because if I fucking tell you, you're going back to Dick and you're gonna tell him because you'll be fucking worried. You always worried too damn much! It'll ruin everything and I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do if they fucking find out you know!"

"Gee, I wonder why I worry so much, Jay." Sam quips. "Who the fuck is they?"

Jason's eyes go glossy and he can't do this. He can't do it. "Please, I can't fucking tell you."

"We're supposed to be a team. You and me."

"I know. I'm fucking sorry. I just can't. Please. You say you trust me so trust me." Jason's fingers dig into her hips with the plea.

Sam nods and she knows he's sorry. He feels guilty and it's going to eat him. He doesn't deserve it and she thinks, the best thing she can do right now, is try to drop it a little bit for right now. They can come back to this. "I forgive you, okay?" Sam rolls her eyes. "And I'll drop it right now but we're definitely circling back to it. But, you have to tell me something, okay? I deserve that." Sam asks with hope in her eyes for the first time since he died.

He can give her that. He can give her something else to hold her off for a little while. That's fair. She forgives him for right now and it's him and her.

"I'm working with someone who has the same vision for the city. They got me into the pit and brought me back." Jason explains. "Ya know, taking out the big players and shit. They don't want anyone to know."

"So, you decided to be the face because?" Sam questions with a raised brow. This is weird. Someone else wants to run the crime of the city, but it's too big of a risk for them to show their face but not for Jason to be handling all of it?

"I've got the training." Jason shrugs casually. "You trust me, right?" Jason asks.

"Of course." Sam nods as her words are slow. "But, it's weird and I think you know that."

"It is." Jason chuckles. "Just...trust me, babe. I got this, promise." Jason offers her his troubled grin as he squeezes her hips.

"That really is not as reassuring as you think it is, Jay." Sam offers him a grin but she decides to take it. She has to take what he's willing to give her right but she is definitely digging into this one and she's gonna let Jason think she's letting it go. She doesn't want him to go off the deep end trying to cover more of his tracks. "Fine." Sam widens her eyes at him as Jason gives her a smirk. "Still mad at you."

Going back and forth isn't going to do either of them any good, especially since Jason is clearly going to keep everything a secret anyway. So, Sam decides, she'll dig later and she'll just let them exist in this moment back together. She doesn't want him to have to go and it leave like this.

"Good." Jason nods quickly as Sam gives him a fake scowl.

"Yeah, fuck you." Sam nearly laughs as she says it and the cold feeling in her chest starts to dethaw.

"Time and place, babe." Jason quips back and he has missed her so much.

"Fuck off." Sam shakes her head as she looks down and then back to him, looking at the streak of hair. "Are you okay? Ya know, ya died."

Jason nods. "Yeah, all good." Jason clears his throat. He watches Sam start to chew her cheek as her eyes scan over his face. The soft smile starts to fall short as he sees the distress start to take over and he knows. "I remember it, I know you want to ask."

"Yeah..." Sam nods and she swears she just swallowed her own heartbeat. "That's....fucked." Sam nods with wide eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, not your fucking fault. I'll be fine." Jason shakes his head and he desperately cannot talk about it. Not like this. He can already feel his hands start to grow clammy and cold. They're nearly vibrating against her suit. "Can we not..."

"Yeah." Sam smiles softly as she runs her fingers through his hair. Sam changes the subject more light-hearted. "What's up with the hair?" She laughs softly as the white strands fall through her fingers.

Jason's eyes look up as the strands fall onto his forehead. "Fucking stupid, right?"

"I like it, actually. It looks good on you." Sam drops her hand, a smile splitting her face.

Jason's heart thunders against his ribs and he hasn't felt happy since coming back, not really. He's been a little busy getting things in motion for him and Crane. There was of course a weird relief and happiness of being alive but that was just immediately followed by guilt and anxiety, like he distrubed the forces of nature by coming back. The drug helps that fear, too. And it helps the guilt, a lot more than Jason really realized it would. But, he hasn't felt happy and he finds himself looking down at Sam and he feels a sense of happiness. It's different than before, but it's there like a small light hidden in the back of his heart.

"You think so?" Jason raises a brow at her.

"Yeah, of course." Sam laughs softly.

She knows they need to have a longer discussion about everything. But, this small exchange about his hair feels normal. Maybe, instead of the back and forth about everything that's too heavy, shelving those things is better. For right now. It always worked that way with them anyway. Shelf it for a little bit and circle back. They always made more progress when they did that.

"I really missed you, Jay." Sam's smile starts to fall.

"I missed you, too, princess." Jason smirks and Sam rolls her eyes. "How have you been holding up?" Jason asks cautionly and he's not really sure why he asked. He knows the answer.

Sam shakes her head. "Gar told me he was worried Dick would have me committed. So, there was that. I told Bruce off finally. Babs did, too. Told off the Titans again. Burned down Jerry's old house."

Jason lets out a laugh. "I was being fucking sarcastic." Jason shakes his head. "Flame thrower?"

"I told Gar that's what you would say!" Sam laughs. "No, just acid and a few matches."

"Fuck." Jason lets out a sigh through a smile. "Wish I could've seen it."

"You would have loved it. It, uh, it burned to the ground. Gar wasn't too happy about it but uh, ya know, he let me do it."

"Why did you have Gar with you anyway?" Jason questions knowing damn well that would not have been Sam's first choice to have him with her as she commits arson.

"Oh, he's my babysitter now." Sam rolls her eyes.

"Why? What did you do?"

"I may have killed a guy yesterday and another one this morning, not sure if Dick knows about that one yet."

Jason's brows furrow before he quirks one up. "The fuck are you killing people for?" Jason's heart sinks and he didn't want her to have blood on her hands.

"Uh," Sam raises a brow. "You decapitated six people." Sam stares up at him and Jaso nods his head. "Exactly. Which, by the fucking way, what the fuck? Don't tell me just...what the fuck?" Sam scrunches her face before shaking her head quickly. "Because they fucking suck. Guys like Pete Hawkins who you beat me to, by the way."

Jason laughs as his nose scrunches. "Oh, I'm so sorry I didn't know you were gonna start killing dickweeds."

"Good, you should be." Sam grins back. "Yeah, so, uh, Dick's mad about it and made Gar come with me and it was a whole thing. But, you have the Titans busy tonight so I didn't have to lose him like I did this morning."

Jason shakes his head and he has to ask. Jason knows where her moral compass was. She would have killed Jerry had he not stopped her and a part of him thinks she would have tried to kill Dr. Light if she were on her own. He knows she killed some of the men from CADMUS, in self-defense. But, she decided, after he died, to actually start killing so he has to ask.

"Are you doing that because of me?"

"Yes and no." Sam shrugs. "You, me, Molly, Dick, Diego, all the others. For all of us. Like we talked about but uh, I'm just taking it a step further into permanent. What about you? Is that why you're going after who you are?"

As much as he didn't want her to have blood on her hands, he can't very well disagree. He gets it. He's still somehow surprised and not. And a part of him almost finds it a little amusing. He dies and comes back to clean up the city as Red Hood and from the top. Meanwhile, he dies and Sam decides to start killing the guys that don't make it to Bruce's radar. 

"Kind of yeah." Jason nods. "Organized crime. Can't stop it completely but you can run it, control it from the top."

Sam lets out a laugh. "Yeah, that's smart." She shakes her head. "Better than nothing."

"Exactly." Jason chuckles.

"I'm really happy you're alive, Jay." Sam nods her head up at him before she brushes his hands off of her and closes the remaining distance between them, wrapping her arms around his middle.

She can feel him relax under her again and it's like it was before. He pauses for a few seconds and then wraps his arms around her. He presses a kiss to the top of her head as Sam squeezes him and it feels like it's supposed to. It's not supposed to hurt. It's not supposed to be sad and heartbreaking and bitter and sour. It's supposed to be just him and her. The two of them together. And that's how they are on this rooftop. And Jason wants to be relieved because she's hugging him but he knows she shouldn't and he knows he needs to ask about sides. Titans are on his list. She is a Titan.

"Hey, uh," Jason clears his throat. "Are you working with the Titans?"

Sam pulls away looking up at him with confusion. "No? Moral dispute situation and you're keeping them busy. Why?"

He can't tell her but he thinks if he tells her that one more time, she might punch him. 

"Keep it that way." Jason states.

"Are you really going to target them? They're....they're your friends. Your family."

"They're gonna keep coming after me." Jason keeps it short and it's not a full lie.

"And if you told Dick you're alive, you know, he might actually understand, right? Like, he might fuck off. You're the reason the Titans are back. Red Hood."

"No." Jason scoffs as he shakes his head. "You know how Dick is with me."

"He's had your back since you died, Jay. And...he's been there for me, too. I mean, he's actually doing kind of a job at the whole leader thing right now. You should talk to him." Sam presses softly.

"No." Jason shakes his head as his jaw squares and Sam finds this to be weird. Jason doesn't talk about his feelings but he doesn't even have to. He should just show up. That's all it'll take. He has to know that. Doesn't he? "It'll be all about him being fucking right and doing better or whatever. It's not fucking worth it and I'm not going back to before."

"What does that mean?" Sam asks as her brows knit together in confusion. All she wants to know is where the hell this is even coming from. They were fine before he died.

"Nothing. Just...don't work with them, alright?"

"You're not gonna tell them you're alive?" Sam questions him as the pieces start to connect.

Jason shakes his head. "No and can you not tell them? Please."

"Jason, how the hell can you ask me to do that? Gar is your best friend. And you want me to go back to the manor, look your best friend and your bother in the eyes and not tell them you're alive?"

"Yeah." Jason nods once. "Look, it fucking sucks but if you tell Gar then you gotta tell everyone because Gar's face will give it away. Dick will tell everyone, too. This has to stay between us."

"But why? You're alive and that's a good thing in case you forgot? Like...Jay..."

"No, I know." Jason nods.

"You can't tell me?"

"No." Jason nods his head.

"You fucking suck." Sam lets out a sigh. "Fine, but you better come clean with Gar and Molly soon. I can't lie to them for weeks. They'll hate me."

"I know." Jason nods quickly. "I'll tell them but not right now."

"Okay, Jay." Sam rolls her eyes. "So, you're telling me not to work with the Titans. Can you give me some sort of a reason not to? I know, you can't tell me. But, come on, Jay. Give me something."

Jason pauses for a second, bouncing ideas in his head before he settles on one. "Think about it, if you work with them you have to go against me. And if you don't, they'll come after you, too. Don't want you in the middle of it." Jason explains and it's not a lie.

He really, truly, does not want her in the middle of it. Sam is the one who'd get hurt in all of it. But, it's also because Jason knows Crane is going to want more information on her. He didn't tell him nearly enough before he died and Jason doesn't want to. Instead, he'd rather assure Crane that Sam is not an issue because she's not working with the Titans, as loyalty to him.

"Alright." Sam lets out a sigh. "That's...a good point." Sam knows if it came down to it, if she really really needed to pick a side, it would be Jason's. And she does not want to do that. His reasoning is good enough for her. "Okay." Sam nods softly.

"Thank you, Sammy."

"Mhm, ya owe me, Jaybird." Sam flashes a grin at him.

"Anything for you." Jason's voice drops as his brows knit together and he offers her a sarcastic nod.

"Oh, is that so? Anything?" Sam gives him a wild grin as she looks at his lips.

"Anything, babe." Jason teases, dipping his head down slightly.

Sam's lips brush over his. "I'd really like Excellent Gotham right now actually."

Jason's head tilts back with a laugh. "It's not even that good!"

"It's the best! You have bad taste!" Sam laughs back.

"Shut up." Jason groans, cupping her face with one hand and bringing her lips to his.

Jason feels her smile against his lips and he gets this sense of home again. Her mouth moves with his and he feels like he's been ducked right back home. It's a warming feeling but then thoughts of the manor come back and Bruce and Robin and the Joker. Home doesn't feel the same anymore because he died and he let Sam and Bruce down. Home doesn't feel the same anymore because it's not safe there. Home isn't the same because Bruce didn't kill the Joker, not even for him. That's what Crane said and Jason knows Bruce's morals. Home isn't home because he's lying to Sam and he feels guilty. It all feels a little too heavy again. And he can't do it right now. So, he pulls away.

"I'm sorry." Jason shuts his eyes for a second and Sam feels her heart stop. Not again. "I-I gotta go." Jason swallows thickly.

"W-what? W-why?" Sam asks.

"I just do." Jason nods down at her and he's begging for her to forgive him. Jason presses a kiss to her forehead and backs away. Sam's entire body erupts in chills and he can't leave. Not again. "I'll call you." Jason pulls out a burner phone from his pocket and hands it over. His hands are shaking again and Sam is thrown into a worrying spin.

"Jay--"

Jason shakes his head. "I'm fine, alright? Take it and I'll call you. I promise." Jason urges as Sam takes the phone from him.

"You're....you're gonna leave?" Sam asks as her eyes start to water. "B-but uh, I don't want you to." Sam looks down and tries to tug at the ends of the sleeves of her suit and Jason hates himself for doing this. She'll understand later. She has to.

"I have to. I have some shit I gotta get to. But, look, I'll be fine." Jason kisses her cheek and takes a step back. "You and me?"

Sam watches him with a breaking heart. She knew he wouldn't come back with her because he wants this to be a secret but she was really hoping they'd have more time. There's never enough time.

"You and me." Sam nods and Jason offers her a sad smile as he goes to walk away and she doesn't want him to. "Please, don't leave me again, Jay."

Jason freezes in his stance, his jaw clenching. Her voice shatters his heart. It's desperate and soft and weak as if she's clawing at all of her self-control to keep it together again. If it were just them, he would never. He'd go back with her. And maybe there is a tiny part of him that questions the whole plan. But, he can't do that because he knows Crane is right.

This is the way to get the city back because Bruce was wrong. This is the only way. And Jason wants his own revenge. He can't do that if he goes back. Jason swears he deserves his own revenge for everything that happened to him. Crane is right about mostly everyone. But, it is agonizing hearing her ask him not to leave and knowing he has to. This is the hardest thing he's ever done.

"I'm so sorry, Sammy." Jason turns around. "I'll be fine, trust me. I'll call you."

"I love you." Sam states, chewing the inside of her cheek as she desperately tries not to burst into tears again.

There's the smallest bit of relief that comes over him. He was hoping she still did.

"Love you, too. Don't do anything fucking stupid, alright? And don't worry so much. Get some damn sleep and go back to the manor and eat something. I'm fine."

"You don't do anything fucking stupid. And you should get some sleep and eat." Sam quips back weakly.

"Yeah, alright." Jason chuckles. "I'll call you, swear." Jason turns back around and heads back inside.

A few tears leak from Sam's eyes as she quickly wipes them away. She has no idea what to make of this whole thing. None of it makes any sense. But he has to be real now. It all has to be real. He's alive and he seems...well given the circumstances. And she has no choice but to trust him, it's just really hard.

The burner starts ringing just as Sam puts her mask back on.

"Hello...?"

"Told you'd I'd call you." Jason says through the helmet.

A smile tugs at her lips. He's still a shithead. "Yeah, okay." Sam rolls her eyes.

"Just wanted you to know I mean it. I'm not leaving you like that again, alright? Trust me."

This small gesture does ease some of her worry. Not all of them, not even close but enough. Maybe she has a little bit of hope it'll be okay this time. It has to be. "Okay, Jay. Please, be safe out there."

"I will. You, too. Don't do anything fucking stupid." Jason chuckles.

"Of course not." Sam laughs back as she makes her way back into the building. "I only do stupid shit when I'm with you."

Jason laughs on the other end. "Sure, babe." Jason quips. "Love you." Jason says.

"I love you, too." Sam smiles softly as Jason hangs up.

As Sam walks back into the building and heads out to her bike, she thinks about everything Jason said. Jason is usually very careful with his words, when he needs to be anyway. Which makes her think that's what he was doing, being careful not to reveal too much but just enough. He's working with someone but he can't tell her who. Of all people, Jason knows he can trust her. He's trusting her not to tell her best friends he's alive, but he can't tell her that? That's odd. He said he got help with being scared and the shaking and nightmares. What in the fuck is that even supposed to mean? Sure, it's great he's back and he's alive and she is relieved but those things are worrisome.

She's not supposed to dig but Sam likes to dig. Sam likes to have all of the answers especially when it comes to Jason so she gets back to the manor and heads to the Batcave. She hangs up her suit before she sits at the Batcomputer. She taps the keys as she thinks.

If anyone knows Jason, it's going to be her. If anyone can figure it out, it's going to be her. And while he told her not to, she has to. He came back from the dead, literally woke up, and decided to be a crime lord. There is something off about that and she needs an answer. She needs to know he is actually safe with everything that's going on. Though, she will give him the fact everyone else seems to be scared of him now. That's at least nice.

Jason, on the other hand, does not feel relieved. This is for the best. Crane is right. The city doesn't need Batman. It needs someone new, someone willing to do all of this shit Bruce was too cowardly to do. His ways don't work here. They never have. It's Jaosn's turn to take over. Control the crime instead of trying to get rid of it. Organized crime is better than whatever the hell is going on in Gotham today. But, he feels guilty anyway.

He went out behind her back and he died. He never got to say goodbye. She never got to say goodbye and she found him. It was so wrong of him to think she wouldn't. It happened to him and he has the privilege of not seeing the aftermath of what the Joker did to him. He has to deal with the trauma that comes with it and he lives through it, which is its own hell but he put Sam through a different hell by her being the one to find him. He can only imagine what she saw. And he hates that thought.

And he hates the way she looked at him. Torn between disbelief and what he swears was hatred. He never meant for any of this to happen and yet, she's the one that got hurt in the crossfire. It was selfish, he tells himself. It was selfish not to just tell her. He remembers thinking that before he blacked out. He remembers wishing he would have told her and he still won't. He has the opportunity now to tell her and he just can't. He knows Crane has good intentions but there's something pecking at the back of his head that says to keep her out of it. It's Jonathan Crane. He trusts him but Crane might not trust Sam and that's a problem. He knows it. So, he has to deal with it.

By taking out the inhaler and inhaling a deep breath as his pupils glow a bright yellow. The fear and guilt and pain and worry fade away from his veins. The pecking goes dark and he feels nothing. He feels nothing at all anymore, not even the relief of feeling nothing. He's just numb and it's so much better than the alternative as he heads back to the basement in Arkham to prepare for the next step.

Sam searches the Batcomputer for the night Jason died. She's avoided it. She saw him that night and that was enough for her. She doesn't need to see it actually take place but she looks for the footage anyway. Some part of her thinks maybe if she can find it, she'll figure out what's really going on. Jason is back from the dead and that's great, but something lead him to the Joker that night. And he did not offer her a good enough explanation. Maybe the answer is in the footage. Someone had to know he was going to go out there and likely die. She wants an answer as to who that is and why they would do it to him. It had to be some sort of setup somehow. So, she finds the footage because of course Bruce didn't delete it and she presses play as she holds her breath.

She watches Jason enter the amusement park. Her heart starts to race and she swears she's not going to watch the whole thing. She doesn't need to. So, she has her hand ready to pause it. Jason looks around at the closed-down games but The Joker appears on camera but Jason's not turning around. Sam's brows furrow, fully expecting Jason to realize the Joker is right there but he doesn't.

Sam doesn't get why he's not turning around. He has to know the Joker is there, he has to know. Jason has really good instincts with being on the streets and Robin training. How is he missing this? And then one of the games goes off and Jason turns around, a look of fear on his face before the Joker smacks him with the crowbar.

Sam pauses the video as quickly as her reflexes will allow her. She clenches her jaw as she remembers what he looked like that night. It'll be forever burned into her eyes. Her hands start to shake as her eyes start to burn. She chews her cheek hard enough to draw blood, trying to keep it together. He's alive. He's alive. He's alive. She repeats it over and over and over again. Trying to convince her own memories they're wrong.

Sam shakes her head, fast-forwarding, barely looking at the screen until the Joker walks off with a pep in his step, proud of the job he's just done. Sam sniffles as she swallows the lump in her throat, her eyes trained on the screen as she watches Jason's lifeless body. A part of her thinks this was dumb because she's not getting any more answers. Instead, she's just retraumatizing herself and getting more questions. It's not really helping but she had hope, it would show something. And it doesn't. She watches herself appear on screen and that's enough. Sam pauses it and runs a hand through her hair before putting her head in her hands.

She takes a few minutes to breathe and gather herself before she plays it back. She watches it over and over again, always stopping the second Jason jumps and then she rewinds. There has to be a clue. There has to be because Jason left a fucking formula for a drug lying around. He got sloppy at some point so there has to be some sort of clue. So, she plays it back so many times she loses count until she hears someone come in behind her.

Sam is quick to exit out of the video before she spins around to see Dick still in his Nightwing suit.

"Hey." Sam lets out a shakey breath, eyeing Dick carefully.

"What are you doing?" Dick crosses his arms over his chest, looking at the blank screen behind her. He saw her exit out of something.

"Nothing." Sam shrugs, brushing it off. If he knows, he'll definitely have her committed. "How'd it go?" Sam switches it back to him. "Nightwing."

"It was a setup." Dick scoffs but he's still watching her. She's up to something and Dick is really growing to dislike when she's up to something. Nothing good ever comes from it. "What were you looking at?" He presses.

"What do you mean a set-up?" Sam asks. "Just some stuff. It's nothing." Sam pushes. Dick narrows his eyes at her, holding his stance on withholding what happened tonight. Sam rolls her eyes, thinking of a quick lie. "Ya know, it bothers me. Jason going after the Joker. If he wanted to prove himself, to you and Bruce, why the Joker? There are so many others that would have done that job and Jason was reckless, not stupid. The Joker was stupid. So...Bruce is a sick fuck and kept the footage. Thought maybe I'd find something, a why. Did not."

"Excuse me." Dick shakes his head, his eyes widening and the worry he felt before for her intensifies. "You watched--"

"No, I stopped it. I didn't watch the whole thing go down. I just watched until Joker showed up. Jason...he never saw him coming. I don't know. It's whatever, ya know? So, now ya know." Sam shrugs her shoulders. "I'm fine, ya know, all things considered. So, it was a setup?"

"You really don't need to be watching that." Dick scolds.

"I know. I won't again." Sam nods her head softly, looking to her lap and then back to him.

"He lured us to the bank using the kidnappings as a ploy. They were never in danger. Gar and Conner found them in a few vans, safe. The bank was a set up to blow it up with us." Dick explains.

Now that Sam knows Red Hood is Jason, most of that isn't surprising. Him targeting the Titans though, that's still weird.

"Shit." Sam nods her head. "I mean, at least the kids and parents are okay." Sam states. "Still no idea who he is?"

"No. We'll catch him though."

"Why? He's not doing anything worse than Penguin. Is he really a Titan problem?" Sam questions, more so worried for Jason's sake. And maybe she is worried for the safety of the Titans.

She wonders if being resurrected changes someone. Jason's messing with fate in a way. Fate took him, killed him and now he's back. It's a betrayal. Maybe fate decides to keep a part of his soul as a warning that it'll come back for him. Maybe that's why he's doing this. A part of him died and stayed dead. But, Sam thinks maybe that's not it because of how he was with her. All things considered, he seemed normal. Maybe it's the trauma of dying that changes someone. Jason says he remembers it, maybe that changed him, changed how he saw the Titans in a way. She isn't sure but it pecks at her anyway.

"Yes, he's getting people killed, kidnapping people, robbing banks. That's bad. This is a problem. And he's targeting us." Dick states with the raise of his brows. "The Robin clue was not a coincidence. He asked for me specifically." Dick's eyes narrow and he's growing suspicious. "Do you know something?"

"Why the fuck would I know anything? I'm just saying. He's not that fucking bad. I mean, it terms of Gotham freaks go." Sam defends. "Maybe that mother did do something but you missed it. I don't know."

"What were you doing tonight?" Dick questions and Sam can tell he's spinning this on her.

"Patrolling." Sam shrugs. "You can check, I didn't kill anyone. Didn't even attack anyone tonight. You should be proud." Sam quips as she gets up.

She feels bad about it. Jason is alive and she can't say a damn word. A big part of her believes that if Jason were to just come home, they could work it out. Whatever the hell is up with Jason and Dick now, they could work it out. It's not fair to withhold it and it's not fair Jason asked her to do that. So, Sam isn't going to tell Dick, but she's gonna ask a few questions. This is going to get messy when he finds out and Sam is going to be lodged in the middle of it. That's not what she wants so when Dick finds out, she wants to make sure she drops enough questions that he'll know she knew. And wanted to tell him. It's not technically betrayal if Dick doesn't figure it out.

"Do you think it's weird the new guy is targeting you guys?" Sam asks carefully. "I mean...you were in San Francisco. You didn't go on patrol at all until he asked for you. Don't you think that's weird?"

Dick nods his head and he is really getting the feeling she's figured something out and maybe she's willing to share for once. "Yes, of course, I think that's weird. That's one of the reasons it's important we find out who this guy is and bring him in."

"Right." Sam nods her head. "Well, you said Robin wasn't a coincidence so who knows you're Nightwing and Robin?"

"What makes you think he knows I was Robin? Maybe it was about Jason." Dick offers, gesturing out a hand before crossing it back with his other arm.

"Maybe, yeah. But, that would mean it would have to be someone who knows Nightwing also knew Robin. Either way, it has to be someone you know, right?"

"And you're telling me you don't know anything?" Dick's voice is a accusatory.

"I don't know anything, just thinking about that, too."

Dick lets out a sigh. "You could come along and help." Dick offers. "It might be good for you."

"Pretty sure you just don't want me to keep up with my hit list."

Dick holds the bridge of his nose, resting a hand on his hip. "You have a hit list?"

"Yes." Sam answers casually. "I'm good." Sam shakes her head. "Uh," She furrows her brows because to be fair, maybe if this was some random guy she would take up the offer to run from the grief she's supposed to be in. But, it's Jason. She can't cross the line between the Titans and him. She won't pick between the two of them. Keeping his secret is bad enough. If she goes with when they fight him eventually, that means she has to pick a side. She will not pick between them. "It's just...I know it might help but, uh, I just...I don't know. Can I think about it?" Sam asks.

Dick nods softly. "Yeah, of course." He offers a soft smile. "Just...let me know. We could use all the help we could get."

"Yeah." Sam nods letting out a soft sigh. He has no idea. And she feels horrible about it.

Jason is already making her pick between them and she'd be lying if she said there's a part of her that isn't already a little resentful. Sam isn't very good at making friends. It's always been her and Molly, Tim as an acquaintance. That's it. But, the Titans, most of them, feel like such a family to her. Gar is her best friend, Conner is really nice, Kory is protective and Sam looks at her like an older sister. Dick is like an older brother, somehow. How can she keep lying to them?

"Seriously, are you okay?" Dick asks.

Sam nods. "As okay as someone can be, I guess." Sam's smile never meets her eyes as she looks to the ground. "Just...uh, trying to figure out how to carry everything okay." Sam chews the inside of her cheek.

"You'll figure it out." Dick assures her. "You have us." He nods his head once.

"You're getting a lot better at this shit. It's kind of weird." Sam offers him a genuine smile. "Thanks. I'm, uh, I'm gonna go to bed. I'll hang around with discussions and stuff with Red Hood but I don't think I wanna go out with the team just yet." Sam nods softly, figuring knowing what's going on is better than just avoiding it entirely.

"Okay, you're always welcome to change your mind."

"Thanks, Dickolas." Sam laughs softly before she walks past him and heads out of the Batcave.

The next day, Sam finds herself in the Batcave with Gar, Kory, and Conner. Gar and Kory are playing chess while Sam and Conner are seated at the Batcomputer. Gar caught Sam up on everything that happened yesterday, including Dick going to Crane for help which is what has lead them to a game of chess. Sam thinks it's insane that Crane is even on the GCPD payroll. He's a master manipulator, but sure, they can definitely trust him.

There's a guilt pulling at the bottom of her stomach as she watches Gar and Kory play. Jason was his best friend and she can't say anything. Gar is understanding. He'll find out Jason's alive and Sam knew and he'll understand why she didn't tell him. That's just how Gar is but, she also knows he's still going to be mad and he should be. Sam would be pissed if the roles were reversed but she has to try not to focus on that because at the end of the day, Jason is targeting them and they're targeting Jason.

Sam is seated on the floor, petting Krypto. "Can you guys even trust Crane on this one?" Sam looks over to Gar and Kory.

"Is he that bad?" Kory asks, glancing over to Sam.

"Yeah, he made a fear gas and poisoned the city. It makes people live out their worst fears as if it's all real. It's insane and he's a master manipulator. I can't believe he's actually on the GCPD payroll." Sam rolls her eyes.

"Dick said we can trust this. He's helped solve other cases." Gar assures her, still studying the board.

"Right..." Sam nods. "What's your plan then? Crack this and hunt him down? Send him to Arkham?"

Kory, Gar, and Conner look over at her confused. Gar knows when something is up. She's a lot better today than she was yesterday. She's not as snippy. He's glad, of course, but he's getting the feeling something is off anyway. She wanted nothing to do with this but Dick says she could help and suddenly she's on board. That's weird, even for Sam.

"Why? You said were going to help." Gar questions but he's not as good at digging for answers.

"Yeah, I mean...I said I'm fine with helping from here." Sam corrects. She is definitely not actually helping, but they don't know that. "I'm just saying, it's Jonathan Crane, Scarecrow. And I don't know. Maybe Red Hood has a point or two. That's all." Sam shrugs her shoulders.

"He decapitated six men." Kory states, a slight snip in her voice as she watches Sam.

"I'm not saying I agree with the decapitation." Sam defends and she definitely does not want to know what lead Jason to that method of murder. "Just saying I don't disagree with who he's killing."

"Whats going on with you?" Gar asks as Kory takes her turn.

"My boyfriend was brutally murdered by the Joker?" Sam quips. "Kind of don't care much anymore about how shit is stopped as long as it is stopped." Sam chews the inside of her cheek and it's not a lie. It's just...Jason is the one doing it.

"Right." Gar nods, unconvinced as he looks back to the board as him and Kory continue their game of chess.

Kory and Gar continue their game while Conner reads over a book on different chess moves. Sam actually finds this to be quite nice. She gets to know what they're planning before anything happens and she can warn Jason. And she isn't actually sabotaging anything. She doesn't know how to play chess, and she's bad at reading. She's really no help right now and that's fine with her. She's pretty content listening and petting Krypto.

"Do you always get this way when you get competitive?" Kory asks, pulling Sam's attention to Kory and Gar. Gar has a grin on his face as he holds his head up with one hand, his other arm holding up his elbow. "By this way, I mean insane."

Gar chuckles softly. "I'm problem-solving." He states as he moves a chess piece.

"Yes, he does." Sam adds in, earning a fake glare from Gar. She offers a wide-tooth grin in response.

"Birds opening. The answer's right in front of us. It's hidden in plain sight." Gar explains.

Sam rolls her eyes. Jason loves to play games so it's not surprising he's literally using bird examples as clues. Though, she does wonder what is making him do it. It reminds her of the Riddler in a way.

"Speaking of Russians," Conner chimes in, pointing a finger at the book with a chuckle. "This guy, uh, this guy Bobby Fisher had the fillings removed from his mouth because he thought the Russians were using it as a radio channel--"

"Stop." Gar cuts him off suddenly, looking over at Conner.

"It's a fact." Conner says, his voice now depleted.

"Hold on. Fisher took out his own fillings?" Gar questions.

"Uh..." Conner stutters, his brows knitting together in confusion. "Not sure if I should talk or not."

"He did it because he thought the Russians were trying to beat him." Gar states, his attention back on the board. Sam looks to Conner with just as much confusion. Gar lets out a chuckle as he gains a grin. "It was a defensive move. We're looking at this the wrong way." Gar sighs. "The answer isn't figuring out more of birds opening moves. It's how we beat it." Gar turns the board around so Kory's pieces are in front of him. Sam can't help but smile softly. There's just something about the way he gets when he figures something out. "Conner, top five defensive moves against Birds opening." Gar states.

Sam grabs the book and hands it over to Conner. Dick walks in just then with furrowed brows as he watches Gar scramble to place the chess pieces while Conner flips through the book..

"I wouldn't." Kory states quickly, gesturing a hand to Dick. "He's on a roll."

"From's Gambit." Conner starts listing. "Uh, the modern defense. Fiancheto. Hobbs Gambit."

"Hobbs?" Dick questions, his attention pulling to Conner. Conner nods quickly and reads off what the play is.

Sam recognizes the name from something Batman and Robin shut down years ago. She has to withhold her eye roll at the thought of it. Jason is just out there planning games with the codes and it's all coming back to Robin. Of course, it is.

"It's a group. They made explosives, right?" Sam looks to Dick.

"Yeah," Dick says quickly as he rushes over to the Batcomputer. "Batman and I shut them down for street dealing." Dick pulls up the building and it shows a 911 call had just come in a few minutes ago.

Everyone gathers around, listening to the call. The other Titans don't know it, but it's Jason who made the call. Sam recognizes the way the modulator sounds with his voice and her stomach sinks. He's really targeting them. Why? It doesn't make any sense. She knows there has to be some sort of reason, but it's a little bothersome anyway.

"It's a bogus call." Dick states as he starts walking off. "He's leading them into a trap."

"Call Barbara." Kory states.

"I don't think she's taking my calls."

"We have to stop those cops." Gar says quickly, following after Dick and Conner and Kory follow him.

"You coming?" Gar looks back at Sam with hope in his eyes.

"Uh...no." Sam shakes her head. "Gonna stay behind but good luck and be careful." Sam nods her head as she watches the rest of the Titans take off out of the Batcave, likely to get Hank and Dawn. Gar offers a sad but understanding smile before he heads off, too.

Sam watches until they're completely out of the Batcave. Once she's certain, they're out of the Batcave, Sam takes out the burner Jason gave her yesterday. She hits redial and waits as the line rings. They're coming for him and while she has no fucking idea what he's up to, and she knows he likely knows they're coming. It's a setup again. Sam has to warn him anyway, just in case. She can't lose him again.

"The Titans are on their way." Sam states as Jason answers the phone.

He cackles on the other end. The drug courses through his veins but something about her betraying the Titans makes him laugh. Something about it is a bit amusing. He knew she wouldn't side with them.

"Thanks." He states but he sounds different.

"You're welcome." Sam states and she would love to pry and find out what is actually going on. The laugh was odd, to say the least.

"Didn't think you'd betray them." It's almost like he's taunting her. His voice is casual but has some sort of bite of mixed amusement and snark.

Sam shakes her head, brows knitting together. "Well, I just want you to be prepared."

"I'm always prepared." Jason quips back.

Sam doesn't like the way he sounds. Something is off. She thinks back to the footage before he died, how he should have known the Joker was there. She thinks about the fidgeting yesterday and how desperate he looked. Today, it's like he's a different person on this call. It's something she'd say she doesn't like very much.

"Okay, Jay." Sam lets out a soft sigh.

"You going?" Jason asks but he's digging. She says she's not working with them which means she should stay back. He hopes she stays back.

"No." Sam lets out a scoff. "Not working with them, you're good. Don't fucking kill any of them, Jason."

"They should stay out of the way." Jason warns.

"Uh-huh, right." Sam rolls her eyes. "I'm serious. Don't kill them." Sam shakes her head. "Good luck though."

"Thanks." Jason lets out a breath. "Won't need it." Confidence radiates through the phone.

"I know." Sam huffs. "Call me after so I know you're okay, please."

"I will." Jason promises. "Thanks for staying back."

"You're welcome. You owe me." Sam smiles softly.

"All you gotta do is ask, babe."

He laughs on the other end. He knew he could trust her. And he still loves her through the haziness of the drug. He does still feel that part. It's not nearly as strong with the drug flowing through his veins but it's there. He doesn't want her there because of it. But, she can handle herself and they're clearly still on the same team. She's on his side.

"Okay, Jay." Sam laughs softly. "Love you."

"Love you, too." Jason responds back before he hangs up.

A part of her actually doesn't want to know. The more she knows, the worse it'll be with her not telling the Titans anything. At least if the only thing she knows is that he's alive, that's all she knows. That's not that bad. But, he's acting weird and that's the part that Sam does want an answer for. She's not sure how she's supposed to get it.

The Titans come back a few hours later, defeated. They did not get Red Hood, they just took down his men. Sam does her best to hide her relief. But, she intentionally avoids all of them until they're off into their separate rooms for the night. At that point, Sam finds it safe to wind up in the kitchen for a small snack and to think.

Sam hops up on the kitchen island with a bowl of cereal and a cup of coffee. She keeps going over how Jason was yesterday, how he seemed mostly normal. She keeps falling back on his working with someone. She wants to believe Jason wouldn't work with someone bad but if he were working with someone who had good intentions, he would tell her. Time and time again, Sam has proven she can keep her word to Jason. He would tell her which then brings her to wondering why the hell he would work with someone who isn't good? And she goes back to the drug because he avoided an answer to that question. She starts to worry that maybe he is taking something and that's why he's doing this whole Red Hood thing but she's known addicts and none of them decided to be a crime lord overnight.

Sam's head starts to ache from going in circles as footsteps echo into the kitchen before coming to an abrupt halt at the sight of her. Sam looks up, eyeing Dick with a raised brow.

"Oh, you're awake..." Dick states, looking behind him and then back to her.

"Yeah?" Sam questions. "Do any of us sleep normally?" Sam quips. "What're you doing?" Sam raises a brow at him, noticing he looks like he's on some type of mission. The winter coat being a dead giveaway.

"Nothing." Dick rolls his shoulders.

"You know, that's how the conversation went with Jason when I went after Jerry? What're you doing? Nothing. What're you doing?" Sam narrows her eyes at him. "You look like you're...on a mission?"

Dick lets out a sigh. "It's nothing."

Sam nods once. "Heard you guys didn't get 'im tonight. Anything to do with that?" Sam is digging and Dick can tell. Maybe she knows.

Dick figures she has to know. Sam has been acting almost normal all day long. That's weird. Jason was just brutally murdered and she found his body. She snapped on everyone and started killing people but now she's fine? Dick is almost positive she has to know. If Jason were going to tell someone, it would be her.

Dick closes the distance between them and lowers his voice. "Did you know?"

"Could you possibly get any more vague, Dickolas?" Sam quips as her heart sinks.

He can't know. How the hell would Dick know?

"Jason." His jaw is squared.

Sam swallows thickly. Jason told her she couldn't tell anyone. How the fuck did Dick figure it out? But, she's not just going to fold.

"Fucking know what, dude? Spit it the fuck out." Sam snaps.

"Did you know he's alive?" Dick's voice is stern, a warning hint to it not to lie to him.

"W-what?" Sam asks shortly, digging to find out exactly what he knows.

"Don't bullshit me." Dick warns. "Did you know? I broke his helmet tonight, saw him, and I talked to him."

Sam hangs her head as she scrunches her nose. "Yeah." Sam looks up at him with apologetic eyes. "Yeah, I found out yesterday." Sam admits and if Dick knows, she doesn't have to keep it a secret. Jason did not say anything about that.

"Unbelievable." Dick backs away. "You knew and you didn't tell any of us?"

"He asked me not." Sam shakes her head and Dick can see the guilt washing over her face. "I wanted to tell you guys. At least you and Gar but he asked me not to." Sam shrugs softly. "I, uh, just been trying to figure out how the fuck he's real."

"You're not sure?" If anyone would know if Jason is really alive, it would be her.

"I-I don't know." Sam answers. "I mean...I mean yeah like...it has to be him but...resurrection is kind of insane. So...I don't know."

Dick hangs his head for a second and he feels bad for her. She's caught in the middle of the Titans and Jason. He gets why she didn't tell them even if he's pissed about it. But, she's over here trying to figure out if he's really alive just like Dick is. There is one way they can find out.

"Come on." Dick gestures for Sam to follow him as he heads for the door leading to the courtyard.

Sam puts her bowl down quickly before hopping off of the counter and following Dick quickly.

The two of them start their walk through the courtyard and to a shed. Dick unlocks it and opens it while Sam stands outside in the dark, holding her phone for a flashlight. Dick hasn't said a single word on their walk and she's kind of afraid to say anything back. He is surely on a mission. At this point, she's thinking they've all lost their minds. Gotham is taking everyone's sanity.

"Here." Dick pops out a minute later holding two shovels and offering Sam one.

Sam takes it slowly. "Why the fuck are you handing me a shovel?" Sam looks down at it before she looks back at Dick.

"Only one way to find out if it's really him." Dick's face is hard while Sam's falls.

"You want us to go dig up his fucking grave?! Have you lost your fucking mind?!" Sam yells.

The last thing she wants to do is go digging into Jason's grave. First of all, that's just...that's wrong. That's supposed to be his resting place and they're going to disturb it. She's seen that horror movie a time or two and she does not want to be haunted. And she's thinking of the decamp process and what a body would look like after a week. Sam already saw him the night he died, she doesn't need to see him decomposing if Jason is actually still dead.

"How else are we going to know?" Dick asks.

"I-I don't know! But what if we're wrong? We'll be...that's....ya know? Like...he's buried there." Sam says with hesitance.

"You don't have to help if you don't want to. I just thought you'd want the same answer." Dick lets out a breath. "And if I'm gonna do this, I thought it'd be right if you knew."

"Since I caught you." Sam corrects him.

"Yeah." Dick nods. "Do you have a better idea?"

"No." Sam huffs. "Fine but this is fucking ridiculous."

"You're telling me." Dick scoffs as the two of them make their way to the family cemetery.

Sam still thinks it's weird Bruce has this on his property to begin with but in the grand scheme of grave robbing, she's pretty happy about it right about now. Even if digging up Jason's grave feels wrong.

The two of them start digging as lightning strikes from above them. They dig and dig in complete silence, almost worried about saying something into existence. On the one hand, Sam is worried he's dead and he's under them right now. They're going to disturb him and that's not right. But, on the other hand, what if he's alive? What if he really is? She needs to know.

"All you." Sam lets out a sigh, hopping out of the grave as they hit the casket.

Dick looks over to her and the two of them nod before Dick opens the casket.

It's empty.

"Fuck." Dick lets out a sigh.

"Fucking Gotham." Sam shakes her head even if relief fills her chest.

Jason Todd is alive.

A/n: I'm sorry for the late update lmao my birthday was last week and I thought I'd have time to get this done and I did not 😭 also I promise I'm going somewhere with Jason not knowing Bruce killed the Joker because of who I am as a person lol