more like "dont try it until you knock it"

~

dwowzers i havent updated in a week which is like a record for me (there steve i beat you to it haha) but ive sort of for the most part been away from the computer. like i mean in another country away. i posted about what happened in uganda on my blogspot. more about it will be up there soon. i dunno why but the fobrock journal isnt working so i keep having to post there. but in africa everything is so different, you start to appreciate what you have and stop caring about what you dont.

its changed me, i think deeper than i realize yet. im not saying im suddenly a saint but i feel like i cut in line.

when i was there i bit my tongue from complaining so many times its still sore- but everytime i went to talk i realize no matter how bad i had it for a few days, id be back to my normal life and the people around me id be complaining to were stuck. i felt kind of dick for even thinking bad thoughts in my head. honestly it felt super selfish of me to complain about anything so like even when i lost my malaria pills i just toughed it all out. it was an adventure, one ill never have another like again but i am throughly glad i got to experience it.

i cant wait to be the new me. shed and left my old skin in africa, my old views. unfortunately, im still human so little things may get to me still... but ill just ignore them and focus on the things ive got going good for me. after this i dont think i could ever legitly complain about my life and not feel guilty about it right after the words left my lips or fingertips.

while over in africa we filmed the video for "me and you"- im excited for people to see our new video since its pretty major, we had an idea going over of what we wanted to do but once we were there we took a whole new approach to it. i cant wait to hear feedback on it and hopefully take our little band a lot more seriously. but probably not. i just hope it makes some sort of a positive impact and maybe changes a few peoples views, not just on our band but the conditions going on in africa. it seems as though it might not affect us and i wont lie- i used to have the attitude like, "why are we sticking our nose in other people's business that are bodies of water away from us?" but being there personally made me see exactly why we should. hopefully our video will make you see it too.

our band is a lot closer... andy is closer to being sexiest man in the world. he would have the title cemented but johnny depp is still alive tho. so when i say our band is a lot closer i mean at least me and joe are. after all in the airport i had to check his fro for any bugs that wanted to sneak on the plane home. then on the plane we traded new leaked kanye songs. he is one of the few artists keeping it real and ill always back him. definitely love the "bittersweet" song with john mayer on it. two amazing artists on one song, you cant ask for a lot more.

besides the trip to africa making me more aware i read a positive thinking book, it only took about 10 or 15 minutes because it was short. "lifes little instruction book", if you haven't read it i suggest you do at least once. ive had it sitting around forever and finally read it from front to back.

i came back from the trip overseas and immediately heard all of the rumors- im engaged, pregnant (i do have the hips for it i guess), im going to own a new house with ashlee and i have a facebook account where i ask girls to get naked on the webcam. uhh.. no. i dont understand how people buy that. just because someone says they are me does not mean they are me. i could say im morrissey, it doesnt make me him. the only proof this person had that "they were me" was a bus call sheet or something, and anyone can get ahold of that. i have a few back home in illinois from some of my favorite bands that i found after the show. i dunno how some people can be so gullible and fall for this shit let alone take it to the media... but unless you get a link from or read it on the fobrock site dont believe it. i dont have time to have a facebook account, to cyber with other girls.. especially when ashlee was with me during the supposed time this took place. yeah i am really going to say no to the real thing, make her wait while i sneak off.. lock the door and spend some alone time with the computer and my hand. are you fucking nuts? no way. oh well. i guess using my name helped some guy get off. clearly they couldnt on their own.

i understand people are curious about my personal life.. but unless im miserable i dont understand why fans are saying ashlee should die, calling her names and mocking her right on our site where they know i will see it and be pissed. its bad enough they say it at all but youd think they would know not to right there? and fans keep writing in to the q and a (which does work even tho the journal wont?) asking about the rumors about me and ashlee going around. and i have said over and over my personal life is my personal life. i dont want her subjected to what the media will have to say any sooner than she has to be- and really it isnt anyones business but me and her. as long as i can ill protect her. plus, we are not going to sell our relationship to the highest bidder and have cameras following us around 24/7. ive seen what the media can do to relationships- and its never been good. as far as i know there has never been a time where the media has been positive towards a couple, or had a positive effect on anyone except david and victoria beckham maybe.

anyways sorry none of my update probably makes sense, ill reread it in the morning and youll see question marks floating around above my head like "wtf". its late but i still have jetlag so my body cant realize that yet. everyone that would get first comment to this is idle so i guess we will have to wait and see who wakes up first.

xoxo,
peter

oh yeah and a random fact for you- if you didnt know.. sting was a teacher at oxford. it explains why he writes some of the most remarkable and prolific songs and also it gives you a whole new understanding to the song "dont stand so close to me"..

ps- whoa. i almost went the whole update without talking about harry potter.. that felt weird when i hit "update journal". see unlike pretty much everyone else i dont really care if anyone ruins it for me before i read the book.. its not like that is going to stop me from reading the book and seeing if theyre full of shit and messing with me or not. ruining one line or paragraph of a 700+ page book shouldnt stop people from still reading it.