Peter huffed a sigh, leaning his chin on one hand. He looked at the beautiful tree Ned had set up with his family, tall and pristine, the pine needles showing it was indeed an actual tree- not like the thin, measly, plastic ones that May had only ever been able to afford, reused every year, with the long, thin, pole of a middle shown easily through the wire and green plastic branches. 

Setting down his phone, Peter glanced at the large saw that Tony had been using in the lab- where he was currently sitting, actually, sitting on a white spinny chair and watching his father get covered in grease. He was meant to be fixing his web shooters, but he had finished a while ago and was too tired to do anything else after his long day on an excursion.

An idea quickly popped into his head and Peter was out of his seat within seconds, snatching the saw and his suit, disappearing out of the window, phone laying forgotten on the counter. 

"Hey Pete can you hand me that screwdriver?" 

Tony frowned, wondering why Peter was so uncharacteristically quiet all of a sudden. He tried to sit up, only to smack his head on the bottom of the car he was fixing. 

Swearing, Tony clutched his throbbing forehead, moving out from beneath the car and sitting up properly, thankfully not smacking his head again. 

Peter didn't seem to be anywhere, though his bag still lay in the corner, bag open and books spilling out, and his phone lay on the table, screen still on but dark. 

Tony tapped it and the screen lit up again, only to show a picture of a christmas tree that Ned had decorated with his family. 

Perhaps he had gone to get decorations? Tony shrugged, deciding he would tell Peter they already had an overflowing box of decorations in storage that they used every year when he got back, then get someone to return them for him while he made Peter a hot chocolate. 

He didn't notice that the saw was missing, or Peter's suit. 

****

To those spectating, they simply thought Spider-Man was remaking a scene from the movie Elf, though Peter thought this was just a great way to save money, sawing through the trunk of a tree. 

Luckily for him, there wasn't many spectators, and those who were there didn't seem to call the police- obviously finding this funny as some videoed him, putting it on instagram and Snapchat with the caption; Spidey the Elf 😂.

It didn't take long for Peter to fully cut down the tree, yelling timber loudly as it went down. Then, after the loud thud of it falling, Peter started dragging it back to the tower. 

He got a lot of beeps from cars, for the tree was so big it covered the entire road when he crossed it. Luckily the police didn't really tell him off, for it looked like he had just bought a tree from one of those christmas tree places. 

——-

Tony stood in the lounge, wondering when Peter would be back, making himself a cup of peppermint tea. He had recently gotten into the drink after he tried to get off coffee for a little while, a suggestion by his therapist. 

Steve was playing an intense game of scrabble with Sam and Wanda. Bucky was supporting Steve, and Clint was supporting Sam. Natasha and Pepper were supporting Wanda. 

"Philanthropist. 24 points." Wanda said, smirking. 

Steve and Sam looked at her in shock. 

"You must have been cheating," Sam said incredulously. "You can only have seven tiles on the rack, and..." Sam trailed off as he realised she had lined it up perfectly to get the right letters in the right places from other words. 

"But..." Clint said, while Steve stared at the board. 

Wanda just raised an eyebrow, leaning back in her seat. She high fived Natasha and Pepper without looking, watching the boys freak out. 

"She must have cheated," Bucky concluded. "That's impossible." 

"Believe what you want boys, but I didn't cheat." Wanda told them, grinning. 

Sam stood up, threw his hands in the air, then walked out of the room. Steve just put his head in his hands, Clint and Bucky patting his back and whispering comforting things to him. Wanda, Pepper and Natasha stood up, chatting together and talking about how maybe they could go Christmas shopping together. 

All of a sudden, friday's voice echoed through the room. 

"Peter requests irondad's help in the lobby." 

Tony sighed as he put down his tea. "Did he hack into you to change my name to irondad again?"

"Yes boss."

"Did you let him?"

"Yes boss."

Everyone giggled slightly and Tony headed to the elevator, not questioning it when the rest of the avengers piled in, curious to see what Peter needed help with. 

What they found was certainly not what they expected. 

"Peter- what the hell?" Tony said, looking between the very exhasperated looking happy, and Peter, as Spider-man, with a massive tree dragged behind him. 

"I got a Christmas tree!" Peter said excitedly. "Now all we need to do is get it up the stairs and decorate it."

"Peter if you wanted a christmas tree you could have just asked, I could have easily bought one.... did you cut this one down?!" 

Peter grinned sheepishly behind the mask, and Tony pinched the bridge of his nose. Steve gave Peter his eyebrows of disappointment, but behind him Clint and Natasha were mouthing; 

'Good job!'

Wanda was beside herself with giggles, another wave washing over her everytime she looked back at the massive pine tree, so big the very tip was poking out of the door. 

"Peter, I don't think it's going to fit." Sam told him, walking up and down the tree. 

"Oh," Peter said, sounding disappointed. 

"Let's cut it," Tony said, feeling bad. He knew Peter had never had a real tree before, and so he didn't really get it. 

_____

Soon enough, there was a dozen bags of wood sitting outside the tower labeled 'fire wood' and the tree was dragged up too many flights of stairs by Steve and Peter, who both had superstrength. 

Nonetheless, halfway through Peter was getting very tired, thought Steve was perfectly fine and barely breaking a sweat. 

On the communal floor, Tony had found the box of ornaments and the others were arguing over where they were going to put the tree. 

They finally decided to put it by the large glass wall just for aesthetics, and also because it was close to the couches and beside the tv. 

Wanda cleared the spot, and Bucky explained to Thor exactly what Christmas was and all about it, seeing as it was a thing not celebrated in Asgard. 

Peter and Steve finally got in, Peter immediately flopping onto the couch while the others helped Steve get the tree into place. The top still bent across the ceiling, but it wasn't as bad as before. 

"Time to decorate!" Peter said excitedly, his exhaustion magically going away. He pulled out a dozen things of tinsel, and everyone helped him wrap it around the tree. After that they started adding ornaments, all mitchmatching and in different colours, designs and styles. There was blue sparkly baubles, silver ones, red ones, green ones and a couple that were canary yellow. There was a couple of wooden designy ones, and even one of two santa's in a car. Peter was very proud of his pickle ornament, and laughed very hard when he found a clear ornament with Tony's face painted on it messily. 

"Hey don't laugh, some kid sent me that through the mail." Tony told him, and just out of sight, Clint smiled ever so slightly. Peter wondered if it was actually him who sent the bauble with a painting of Tony looking particularly ugly. 

They all grinned at their very... interesting looking tree, with different coloured decorations, three colourful paper chains and so much tinsel you could hardly see the tree itself. 

The only thing they needed was a star. 

———————-

Have a holly, jolly christmas...

"CLINTON ELIZABETH BARTON!" 

It's the best time of the year,

"Actually my middle name is-"

I don't know, if there'll be snow,

"I DON'T F*CKING CARE WHAT YOUR MIDDLE NAME IS! GIVE MY ARM BACK!"

But have a cup of cheer. 

"But it has a star on it! It can go on the tree!" Clint protested, gesturing towards where Bucky's arm was stuck to the tree by a large amount of rope, the small red star visible at the top.

Have a holly, jolly christmas,

"I DON'T CARE IF THERE'S A STAR ON IT! I NEED MY ARM!" 

And when you walk down the street,

"But then what are we gonna put on top of the tree!?" 

Say hello to friends you know,

"Well put something else up there! Get my arm f*cking down before I throttle you to death!" 

And everyone you meet. 

"I'm not scared of you Barnes." 

Oh, ho, the mistletoe,

"Natasha, permission to kill him." Natasha, who had been sitting on the couch, sat up straighter, an excited grin spreading across her face. 

Is hung where you can see,

Clint's eyes widened. "You traitor Barnes!" He yelled, bolting from the room, Natasha not far behind. 

Somebody waits for you,

Bucky turned to Steve, looking like he was devising a plan. 

"Squat down Stevie, I need your shoulders. And can someone turn that bloody music off?"

Kiss her once for- Peter switched off the music, looking rather sad. 

Bucky clambered onto Steve's shoulders, and the two stumbled around the room for a few seconds, trying to gain their balance. 

"Stevie!" Bucky yelled, almost pulling his hair out as he clutched to his head. 

"Bucky you're covering my eyes, I can't see- OUCH!" 

"F*ck- is that better?"

"No, NO THAT IS MUCH WORSE." 

"Ow what the f*ck- did you just bite me?"

"You had your hand in my mouth! Find somewhere that is not my face to hold on to- ow those are my eyebrows Bucky." 

"DON'T FALL, DON'T FALL, DON'T FALL!!!"

"I can't see WHAT DO YOU EXPECT BUCKY?" 

"Just- get your balance already!"

"I'm trying!" 

Steve stopped moving and everyone sighed a breath of relief, thankful they weren't going to fall. 

"Alright, let's do operation get my arm. Charge Stevie!"

Steve sighed and walked over to the tree, Bucky using his remaining arm to hold onto Steve's ear so tight it was bright red and looking like it was stretching. 

"Stay still Stevie- I've almost got it." 

"Ow- I'm trying!" 

Peter giggled, having filmed the whole thing and currently filming it right now. 

"Ow ow ow- BUCKY WE'RE GOING DOWN!" 

"Stevie!" Bucky yelled as they both face planted into the tree, pulling the whole thing down. 

Once again, Wanda cracked up laughing, everyone else joining in- even Clint, who walked in with a pencil stuck in his ear and a bag of frozen peas taped to his rear end. 

Peter had thankfully caught the whole thing on camera and uploaded it to all his Spider-man social media accounts, the whole thing immediately going viral. Many, many memes were made out of it. Peter refused to admit he had been the culprit to many of them. 

After Bucky had put his arm back on and they had both put the Christmas tree back up again, everyone re-decorated it, then Peter got to choose what they were going to put up the top. 

Being the hilarious gen-z kid Peter is, he decided to tape an avocado to the top. An actual avocado. That would go off. And mould. 

Peter taped an avocado to the top of the tree, which was still bent against the ceiling. 

"Why do you want an avocado on the top?" Sam asked, face rather judgemental as he watched Peter sat on the ceiling and duct taped the avocado in place. It had dawned on them all rather quickly that Peter could have easily gotten Bucky's arm down for him without bringing the whole thing down and putting a hole in the wall ('it was there before we fell,' Bucky had insisted.)

"Because it is our god." Peter told him. 

"You don't even like avocados." Wanda pointed out. 

"Shhhhhhh."

"But-" Steve tried to say, rather confused. 

"Just let the avocado do it's thing mum, it brings us vitamins and other stuff, that's good, right?"

Everyone just looked at Peter, wondering if this should be considered normal by now. By Ned's reaction two days later, the answer was yes. 

('Cool. We have a pineapple on ours.'

'Yeah I was thinking about putting a capsicum on ours, but then I thought, why not an avocado? It has so many vines about it.'

'Dude it has like one.'

'Still. Pineapple has none.'

'Really? Omg let's check...')

It turned out the pen pineapple apple pen one was included as a vine with a pineapple in it. Peter wasn't happy with that. 

MJ's reaction was rather similar, but then she took a selfie with the ornament with Tony's face on it. 

The three of them even tried sneaking candy canes off the Christmas tree, but they turned out to be at least five years old and way out of date, so they were all disgusting and they decided to give them to the others to make them have to feel the same disgust as they did and finally remember to buy new candy canes. 

The idea backfired though, because Sam vomited and Steve made them go and buy more, in date candy canes. Sam didn't ever eat another candy cane, ever. They made him gag now. Peter only felt a little bit guilty- and that was because he had to watch someone vomit, and it sure did smell.

The end of this chapter cos I can't think of anything else to write but it doesn't really feel like a closure in the story. 

A/N Ok so story time (in a story, on a book app/website...) when my dad was young, he used to live in this large property with a lot of pine trees and wildlife and all that. Anyway, since it was christmas, he and my uncle went across the road and cut down a massive pine tree and it took them like hours and my mema (grandma) was wondering where they were and then they came up the driveway with this absolutely massive pine tree that they were dragging down the road. 

They had to cut like only the very very tip to make it fit in the house (it was that big) and even when it was in there it bent across the ceiling for at least two meters, maybe three. 

So yeah, that was a funny story, and that with a mix of the Elf movie was my inspiration for this chapter. 

Merry christmas, happy reading, have a nice day, and there are 11 more of these to come. :)