A/N Requested by Barbemeli :) happy reading! 

Peter sat in the back of the car, Happy driving and Pepper, who had accompanied him to the dentist, talking on the phone to an important person. 

Peter just stared outside the window, eyebrows scrunched as he thought deeply. 

What language do chickens think in? Would they think 'bock bock'? 

Peter absentmindedly began mouthing the words 'bock bock', which caused Happy to send him a weirded out look through the mirror. Peter took no notice, his thoughts wandering once again. 

Would I stick to a nonstick pan? What would happen if I jumped out of the window right now? Would my healing factor fix it? 

Without thinking, Peter started taking off his seatbelt, ready to jump from the window and test his theory, but Happy interupted him before he could do so. 

"Put your seatbelt back on." He said sharply, sending a stern glare at Peter through the mirror. Peter started putting it back on, scowling in disappointment, and Pepper turned around with the phone still pressed to her ear, giving him the same look. 

Peter leant back on the chair, eyebrows still furrowed. "What's in my mouth?" He asked loudly. 

"Cotton wool." Happy grunted, since Pepper was still on the phone. 

"Why've I got cotton wool in my mouth?" Peter asked, voice muffled slightly. 

"Because you got your wisdom teeth removed." 

"They're not there anymore?" Peter asked, eyes widening. 

"Nope." 

"B-But- I didn't even get to say goodbye!" Peter whined, beginning to tear up. 

"Oh well."

Pepper finished up her phonecall and twisted in her seat to look at Peter. "How bout you go and say goodbye tomorrow when you're feeling better, huh?" 

Peter relaxed slightly, leaning back against the seat for a few minutes. 

After a couple of seconds of silence, Peter suddenly sat up, horrified. 

"They took my tongue!" He yelled, tugging on his hair. 

"No they didn't Peter." 

"Yes they did! I-I can't feel it! It's gone!" 

Pepper giggled slightly. "It's still there Peter, don't worry." 

****

"How's he going?" Tony asked, walking over to the car to greet them. Pepper just pointed to where Peter sat in the back of the car, tears dripping down his face, looking devastated. 

"What's wrong bud?" 

"They- they took my tongue!" Peter said, eyes wide. 

Tony bit his tongue, laughing. "No they didn't Peter. It's still there, look." Tony grabbed one of Pepper's mirrors and held it up, showing Peter that his tongue was still there.

"Oh." Peter said, looking into his mouth. Tony chuckled, unbuckling Peter's seatbelt and helping him out of the car. 

"You know dad, I love you. You have cool hair, and-and you wear fancy suits."

"That's nice Peter." 

"Who's Spider-Man?"

"You're Spider-Man Peter." 

"Really? Then-then why don't I have four legs?" 

Tony laughed aloud, unable to hold it in. "What do you mean?" He asked, stiffling more of his giggles as he watched Peter, who looked genuinely confused. 

"Spi-spiders have four legs.... wait that's wrong." 

"How many legs does a spider have then?" 

"Seven, like an octopus." Suddenly, Peter started laughing loudly. By now, they had entered the elevator, and Pepper had been filming since the phone call had ended. 

"What's so funny Peter?" Tony asked, smiling in amusement. 

"Imagine if we had octupuses instead of spiders, that sat on webs and stuff. And spiders lived in the ocean!" 

"Wouldn't that be a starfish?" Tony asked, beginning to think of the scenario. 

"No, starfishes don't exist stupid." 

"Right, of course." 

"You know, I'm tired." Peter mumbled, rubbing his eyes as the elevator doors opened. The avengers were sitting on the couch, some huddled around Natasha's phone, obviously watching some of the footage sent by Pepper, while others watched it on their own phones. 

Pepper stopped filming when the they entered the floor, Tony telling Peter to go to his bed and sleep. 

Once alone in his room, Peter pulled out his Spider-Man costume, clumsily pulling it on over his clothes, leaving the outlines of his jacket and pants evident through the suit. 

"Hello Peter. You appear to be suffering after effects of anasthesia, I advise you don't do patrol this evening." 

"Don't worry Karen, I'm Batman, I can do anything." 

With that, Peter pried open the window, right beside the part that was supposed to open, opening the part not supposed to open with his super strength. 

He jumped out of the window without hesitation, sending out a long web and proceeding to smack right into one of the large towers, peeling off it like in a cartoon and falling the remainder of the way to the ground. 

Back at the tower, the avengers were giggling like school children and watching the footage of Peter, thinking he was sound asleep by now. 

"Sir, it seems Peter has left the tower." 

Tony dropped his mug, coffee spilling everywhere and china skidding across the floor. 

"What?!" He said, face white as a sheet. 

"He has put his Spider-Man suit on, and has proceeded to go on patrol." 

Tony swore under his breath, already suiting up. The others stood up, putting away their phones. 

"I'll go from above, same with you Sam, and anyone who can fly. Everyone else, split up. We'll do comms again." 

Tony chucked an earpiece at everyone, everyone quickly heading to the elevator, except for Tony, who jetted himself down the stairs. 

They all wandered through the busy streets of New York, well aware of how fast Peter could move when webbing himself. 

"Do you wanna see a trick?" Peter asked as he sat on the ground cross legged, having just fallen out of a tree randomly. 

The little girl he was talking to nodded excitedly, her mother coming to a stop. 

"I can do a flip!" Peter yelled loudly, catching the attention of several other people. He then stood up and tried to do a flip, but failed, smacking himself and laying on the ground.

"I know why I couldn't do it," Peter gasped, not moving from his position. By now, people were giggling and videoing. 

"Why couldn't you do it?" The mother asked kindly, realising relatively quickly he was on some kind of medication, she had seen the same sort of thing happen to her teenage son, Gus. 

"Because I haven't eaten a quakson!" Peter yelled, making several people giggle. 

***

"Anyone seen him?" Tony asked, still flying around the city, Friday helping him find traces of his signature red and blue. So far, there had been three false alarms, one in the form of a three year old wearing a fake version of the suit, one in the form of Ned wearing a Spider-Man t-shirt, and one in the form of a person wearing a red t-shirt and blue pants. 

"Well there's footage online already, titled 'Spider-Man on drugs' and that looked like it was near the park. Someone just walked past with batman scrawled on their forehead as well, but with the little spider that Peter does on his autographs. Oh and the spider had seven legs." Clint said, laughing slightly. 

"Clint take this seriously, Peter could get hurt." Steve said seriously, his panting showing that he was jogging. 

"Match found." Friday said, making Tony stop quickly, catching himself in the air. 

"What? Where?" 

"Just below, to your right." Tony turned around, scanning the ground below him and sighed when he saw what Peter was doing. 

Peter was entangled in his own webs, which had several of them in an alleyway like he had attempted to make a real spiderweb. He was stuck, upside down, talking to a couple of people who held up their phones, videoing the whole thing. 

"I am Batman! Tony said so!" Peter told them loudly. "He also told me that I did have a tongue, but I didn't really believe him because I couldn't feel it- oh hey ironman!" Peter cut himself off as he spotted Tony, the person filming turning around with the camera to get Tony in the shot. 

"Guys I found him, he' next to that cr*ppy pizza shop in queens." Tony told the others, everyone sighing in relief. "Head back to the tower, I'll take him back." 

Tony started breaking the webs around Peter and picked him up, not listening to Peter's continuous babble. 

"Sorry about him, he just has his wisdom teeth removed." Tony sighed, talking both to the camera in the person's phone and the person.

"That's okay, I hope he gets better." The person said, giggling. 

Tony nodded his head at her and jetted back to the tower. 

Peter fell asleep on the way, making Tony sigh in relief. 

The others arrived back not too long later, chuckling at the sight of Peter snoring on the couch, Spider-Man suit off. 

He was of course, all over the Internet, with titles such as 'Spider-Man on drugs' or 'wisdom teeth took all the wisdom with them'. 

It was dreadfully embarrassing for poor Peter. 

A/N Sorry this is a little unrealistic with how long anasthesia lasts (I wouldn't know) but it was funny so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also; there's this thing going around through authors, something about fanfiction sand fanart (etc) being banned (What?!) And to try and 'fight back' as you could say, we've been doing #ProtectOurCommunity so if you're an author please also do this I don't want our fanfics and fanart and stuff to be deleted. 

I tried looking this up to see if it was true but I couldn't find anything so I just hope it isn't true because in all honesty I love writing this book and it provides great writing practice. 

Anyway, please also do the #ProtectOurCommunity, I'm doing it, and I'll do it at the bottom of the chapter in a sec. Happy reading, have a great day :) 

#ProtectOurCommunity