a sort of part three to infinity war and endgame.

***

All things considered, it could've been worse. Peter could've been outed or melted down in the gym.

At least, that's what he told himself as he sprinted out of the school. His mind told him to turn back, but his soul ached and needed to be free. He pulled his mask over his head and leapt into the air, no destination in mind and no plan of action.

"Peter, you have an incoming call from Agent Barton." Karen's voice was soft, but held no room for argument as Peter swung carelessly over New York.

As Karen connected the call, Peter found a secluded place to talk.

Clint's voice was angry, and the sharp time of his words made Peter tear up again. "Kid, what are you doing? We just got a call from the school, you better explain yourself."

Sniffing slightly, Peter began. " They showed a documentary on the snap. And-" Peter's voice cracked, "-I just miss him so much. I don't know what to do, because even after all I've gone through, nothing has hurt this bad. I'm dying inside and no one sees, and I have to keep this burden to myself because the reality of it is no one cares."

Peter laid back in the building that he was on and sighed. "Why me?" He asked, although not expecting a reply .

"Trust me, kid. I've asked myself that a lot lately. Everyone wants to be a hero, but they don't realize the experiences mess us up. You've had it bad, but sometimes all you can do is take the days as they come." Clint stopped talking and a pause ensued, calming Peter a bit.

"Wanna hear back here and we can play some games?" Clint offered.

Nothing sounded better, so laughing a little, Peter got up and pointed his web shooters toward the Avengers Compound. After all, he still had family.

Maybe he'd get through this.

***

School.

Peter went to school the next day. He avoided eye contact when possible and just slouched in the back of his classes. Most noticed that something wasn't right, but no one did anything. Ned knew to not bring it up, but MJ didn't.

The whispers began as he sat down at his lunch table.

"Did you hear?"

" Better, I saw it. Ran right out of the gym. "

"Bonkers, that's what he is."

" He was in the movie though. What's up with that? "

"What a nerd. He needs to get his act together."

"Hey Loser. What was up with yesterday?" MJ asked, although not rudely.

Peter just shook his head, and stared down at his lunch blankly.

As Flash walked by, he said, "Hey Parker, you heard the lady. Why were you such a wimp? Can't handle a little action?" As he snickered Flash made sure people heard his voice. "I still don't believe that you knew him."

Peter stood up, his eyes pools of red -hot anger, his breath leaving his mouth in quick breaths as he stood to his full height and stared down the privileged brat.

"Tony Stark was an amazing man. You don't have to believe me, but you don't know how eyes look as their light disappears and turn blank. You don't know how a limp hand feels as you beg the life to return to it. You don't know the feeling after it hits you that they won't come back. You don't understand the action of being out of tears at four a.m. and just sitting there because you know that if you sleep the nightmares will return." At this point, Peter was nearly shouting as tears rolled down his face. He walked towards the exit of the cafeteria before turning back to say one last thing.

"You don't know what it's like to be with some one as they die, wishing that it was you."