Ash and I made a rather late entrance to the engagement ball of Rone and Nadia and I'm glad we did. "They really went all out," I scuffed looking at the abundance of white and pink roses scattered over food buffets, extra chandeliers as if one wasn't enough.

   "Nixin and Rone have many adorers."

   "Nixin wrote that it was mandatory for everyone in good health to come tonight," I explained tightening my grip in Ashs arm which was looped in mine. If that wasnt the case I was more then sure these people had better things to do. I looked over to Rone who was sitting on his throne watching Nixin as she surrounded herself around her ladies smiling and laughing. For a second, only a second I felt a twinge of pain before choking it down. This could have been our engagement ball. "Oh there's Orion and Berella," I said shifting through the crowd picking at the buffet. As for Ash and I... I wasn't quite sure where we stood neither of us said much after our moment earlier and I guess it was for the best tonight wasnt about us.

   Orion didnt even look like he tried to dress up for tonight, regardless he looked handsome. I gave Orion a hug and then asked, "So how is Orion?" I asked smiling widely. I guess I couldn't help but be happy for him because I knew finally... I did something right. I gave the elves back their home and with it an amazing leader.

   "Better then ever," he smiled a small blush on his golden tan skin. "How are you doing? I mean with all of this?"

   I grabbed a wine glass off a tray from a passing caterer. "I havn't lost my mind completely," I murmured taking two gulps trying to calm my nerves.

   "Rones looking at you," Berella said as Ash and Orion dove into tactics and future plans. "Have you talked to him yet?"

   "No of course not, why would I?" I scuffed, "We're here just for a quick appearance and then we are going to the field for our own little party." This is my first time being back since my mother died and I though finally I would take this time to really reflect and by reflect I meant have my closest friends with me while we spoke of only good things. There was too much bad, too much we all feared for.

   "You mean a bonfire right?" Berella smiled wickedly. The field was were the Trax usually had their parties, we had many wild free nights at those fires just burning away our troubles for a moment of happiness.

   "Are you finally talking about having some fun?" Orion pretended to be shocked.

   "You'd be surprised how much fun I can be... oh look this is our song!" I gave my glass to Ash and Berella handed hers to Orion as we dove into the dancing crowd. This song was only for the ladies, didnt matter if you were human, Fae or dragon this was a dance for the beauty of life and her story. The music was light and alluring but some notes held longer then others more eerie. As I danced I caught Ashs eye a few times though his walls were in tack and I couldnt read him but I knew that look.

   I pulled Berella aside out to a balcony, "Theres something I have to tell you."

   "What is it? Is the light around the woods still up?" She went to the worst scenario.

   "Of course," I rolled my eyes. It was eating me up knowing how Ash felt, I wanted to tell him how I felt but I needed to make sure I'm even making the right choice. "I have feelings for someone," I said looking out into the night as Berella did the same holding my hand in hers. "And he shares the same feelings only it's not going to work out at least that's what he says."

   "Its Ash isnt it?" She raised a brow, "The moment the two of you met there was friction maybe not a good kind but that obviously has matured to much more. If both of you want each other what's stopping you two?"

   "Ash was afraid of losing me," I admitted as I played with my hands there was so much she didnt know I didnt even know where to start. "Even though Rone has moved on so quickly and he's got a family it feels like I'm betraying everything I've ever felt. I dont want to be fine without him," I said closing my eyes as the tears spilled down my face, the coldness of them stinging. "A part of me is still hoping he'd wake up and choose me and I cant understand... its madness. If I could I would stay with him forever even after everything he's done, I would chose him always. Everyone was right I'm exactly like Lorelie," she always chose Vero.

   "He will never chose you and you could never be Lorelie that is a life that has been gone for ages," Berella said pulling me into her warm embrace. "I feel your loneliness every night Nadia and it will never stop till you find someone who chooses you, its not him. You have to let go." I didn't even tell her about the crystals that lit up, that Ash and I were mates it only made things more complicated.

   I leaned against the cement column, looking inside of the palace at all the feasting people. "I guess it would be rude of me if I didnt greet the future queen before leaving."

   "Thank the gods I'll be waiting for you," Berella said as we walked back into the ball room parting ways. Before I made my way to Nixin I was stopped by Scarlett.

   "You look beautiful," I told her as I took in her beautiful blue and white gown fringed with white lace and bows.

   "Thank you," she smiled baring her small fangs against her pink lips. "I wont take up much of your time I just thought it was time we had a chat," she tilted her head her feline eyes hungry and blazing with anger. I guess she was right but it was a chat I didnt have the energy or time for.

   "What is it?"

   "Ash isnt who you think he is," she said raising her chin. "He has strung me along for weeks knowing his heart belongs to another and I think you and I both know who."

   I gulped almost cowering under her gaze, "I dont know what you're talking about," I lied.

   She tilted her head and I knew I only made things worse, "I knew you were ruthless but I didnt peg you as a liar," her eyes narrowed. "I see the way you look at him you could have let things be but of course you have to have it all...I guess it would make you happy to know he rejected me once again," her lips tightened into a line. "I'm not an idiot I knew full well when we started things he had an annoying adoration for you as most men but I thought for once it could be me," she shrugged helplessly and then finally I understood. For a moment and not a second more her face seemed to crumble, she was hurt. "It could have been if you didnt care for him as well."

   "I dont have feelings for-"

   "If you are going to lie then you might as well say nothing at all you've never been a good liar," she cut me off rolling her eyes in annoyance. "I guess I feel bad for him... anyone who loves you is sentenced to death."

   "Are you upset with me then?" I asked ignoring her last comment.

   She shook her head, "How could I? Everyone adores you," even though it was a compliment her words dripped with envy. "You will get everything you deserve," with that said she passed me and walked into the crowd. I didn't know why but her last words echoed in my mind... everything I deserve? What did she think I deserved?

   Yes I lied and yes I perused Ash but I owed her nothing, I owed nobody. Putting her out of my head I walked over to Nixin who was alone, Rone was no longer at the throne with her. Where was he? "Nixin, I wanted to congratulate you and Rone formally on your engagement and child but it seems Rone has wondered off. He likes to do that... wonder off when he gets bored," it was a sneaky attack but I enjoyed the fury underneath her mask of happiness. There was something dark in the air tonight, something screaming out in warning.

   "He says balls have never been his thing."

   I raised a brow, "The Rone I knew loved balls," there was something she wasnt telling me and the more I tried to dig in her head the more tired I got. "Berella and I are heading out so I guess till I see you again," hopefully not any time soon.

   Cupping her stomach she asks, "So what has been going on between you and Lord Ash?" She gave me a inquisitive look, "Ive heard rumors."

   "Theres nothing going on between Ash and I plus why would you care?" I asked.

   She shrugged looking around at the crowd in her white lace gown, "I hope one day you and I will become friends after all we have a lot in common." I had to resist the urge to scratch her eyes out and to do so I had to walk away, I needed air before I went to find Berella.

   I made my way to the gardens and happened to run into Rone, of course. "I didn't mean to disturb you," I said as the candles around the fountain lit our faces up in shadows. What was up with tonight? Why couldnt I catch a break?

   "Dont go," he said quickly reaching for me but thinking better of it as I begun to turn back around to look at him. Did I even want to talk to him? What good would that do...

   "We dont have to do this," I said taking in his deep violet eyes and sideways smile. "I left you remember," it was true, "I never expected you not to move on... just not so soon."

   "I havn't moved on," he gulped. "I hated you when you left me with no reason or excuse. You just left...leaving me empty and confused. I didn't think you would ever come back to me," he said rubbing his face in distress. "I fucked everything up," he sat down on a cement bench entwined with green vines from the shrubs that towered all around us. No one could see us and there was only one entry to this maze from the gardens, I didnt know if I trusted being alone with him. If I trusted myself.

   "You fell in love with her," I said looking him in the eyes and for the first time the soft glow almost returned. "And now you will be a family nothing will change that. Just like I cant change leaving you, I cant change fate and fate told us we had no chance."

   "You didnt even give us a chance," he spat. Finally there was the anger he's been holding in, I knew he was mad at me and I knew he fell for Nixin because of that anger. "You didn't even give me a say."

  "Because I know you, you would have written it off as nonsense and I would have stayed," I yelled over him.

   He didnt say anything just dropping my gaze and taking a deep breathe before he said, "We screwed everything up."

   "Yea..." my voice trailed off as I sat beside him. "Or maybe this was always meant to happen and we just cant accept that."

   "I love you."

   "I know," I couldnt say it back not if I wanted to keep making bad decisions. I couldnt be that girl anymore, she was dead nothing but bones and memories. "But you cant love two people," I said getting up, I shouldn't be here not with him.

   "Do you love Ash?" He looked up at me with a blazing fire in his eyes.

   "What no? What makes you think so?"

   "Nixin says people in Dragons Mountain talk," he said now standing up closing the distance between us. "If you could have one last touch," the back of his hand touched my arm and butterflies erupted through me, my knees buckling. Somehow he still had the same effect of me. "One last kiss," he said leaning into me. This isn't right. "One last goodbye would you take it?" he wispered into my ear, was that a riddle?

   I didn't care I couldn't hold out any longer I caved, pressing my body into Rones I reached my face to his and our lips met feverishly. I didn't know what was wrong but I had no control as I poured my heart and soul into a single kiss. A kiss that would only last for this moment, this second.

   Rone picked me up and pushed my back flush against the castle as I wrapped my legs around his waist unable to get enough of him. My body betrayed me yearning for one last goodbye, reacting to Rones matching need.

   He trailed kisses down my neck and I closed my eyes trying not to let my mind talk me out of this, I needed this. "I'm so sorry," he muttered over and over between every kiss, his tongue teasing mine.

   "Shhh," I pleaded trying to silence him with another kiss as his hand gripping my waist hard- and then I realized....

   This isn't love, yes he made me feel things. Desire, passion and memories I wish were still precious but they weren't. I wasn't in love with Rone anymore and it took kissing him to realize that. It took kissing to realize my heart was already falling for someone else.

   As I started to pull back Rone held on painfully tight, suddenly something shined under the moonlight and he drove a blade through my left shoulder. He aimed for my heart but I had enough sense to jerk away crying out in pain wishing the stab hurt worse then the betrayal.