CHAPTER 41
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IT was starting to become a pattern for her to slip out of Finnick's arms in the dead of night.

Bex managed to head back to her room before anyone woke – before even he woke – and changed into a clean jumpsuit. She had serious bedhead from the night prior, and it took a few tugs of her hairbrush to hide the evidence. She allowed her mind to wander, picturing how her hair would've looked if they had done more than just sleep –

Not the time, she reminded herself. Not yet.

Grabbing the stamping tool on her desk, Bex pressed it into her skin and read off her schedule for today. It was all the same – evening shift in the kitchen, serving dinner – except for the new bullet point listed at the top. She was to report to a meeting in President Coin's board room that morning. No sleeping in for her today.

Scrunching her brows together, Bex headed out and took the elevator to the top floor. She walked across the beam, dragging her fingers against the railing, which led to the entrance of Coin's board room. Colonel Boggs waited by the doors and held one open for her. She sent him a tight smile and entered the meeting, taking in all the Victors that were already seated.

Katniss sat between Plutarch and Coin, looking fairly uncomfortable in an armored black outfit and smokey eye makeup. Her hair was wrapped in that famous braid, and a black tiara that looked fairly similar to the Victor crown sat on the top of her head. She had to be wearing the Mockingjay outfit from Cinna's old sketches, the ones Phoenix had shown her.

Phoenix, on the other hand, sat with Effie Trinket and looked like he was trying to tune her out as she argued with Haymitch Abernathy on the other side of the table. Beetee and Johanna leaned in their chairs near the head of the table, and Bex approached a seat beside them.

But not before someone else nudged her through the doorway.

Bex almost stumbled as Finnick smiled at her. She swallowed hard, wondering if he was angry with her for leaving, but he simply pulled a chair open for her and sat down. Her lips tugged and she plopped down into the seat.

Their relationship was so confusing. She didn't quite understand it. The second she assumed they had relieved their tension, she would start overthinking every word she said, and the tension would be there all over again. Did Finnick feel the same way? Why did she think she was always ruining things? Would Snow's influence over her ever end?

Maybe she was just the architect of her own destruction.

She wanted to feel like a person again. She wanted to allow herself to feel everything, without all the guilt and regret. When would it be her time?

"Thank you all for coming," Coin said, bringing Bex out of her brutal thoughts. She stood from her seat, all mighty and proud. "We've successfully created our first propaganda video with Katniss and Plutarch would like all your feedback. With Beetee's help, we're aiming to have this shown all over Panem. We need to appeal to everyone."

Coin directed a remote at the whiteboard behind their heads. Everyone turned towards the board as music started to play. It sounded almost like the Panem anthem, but something was different about it. The black screen opened up on Katniss, wearing the same outfit she was squirming in right now, standing in the middle of a battlefield, armed rebel soldiers charging all around her. She held up a large, red flag with the symbol from her mockingjay pin spray-painted on it. With a conflicted facial expression, she shouted, "People of Panem, we fight! We dare! We end this hunger for justice!" A booming applause erupted from the rebel soldiers, and then the image went dark.

Heads turned around the room. The Victors shared wary glances, and Katniss could only focus on her hands. The silence was almost excruciating as Coin waited for an answer. The only current sound came from Haymitch tipping back in his squeaky chair.

"Well," Johanna snorted at Katniss, "you're certainly not an actress."

Finnick shook his head. "Oh, come on, Johanna. Don't be rude." He couldn't help but crack a grin. "That was pretty bad, though."

Katniss shot them a deadly glare. Bex put her hands on her friends' shoulders as a warning.

Haymitch raised a finger. "Hey, um – Madam President," he said, rising from his seat.

"Indulge me, for a moment, if you would." Haymitch moved his hands around as he spoke. "Let's all think of one incident where Katniss Everdeen genuinely moved you. Not one where you were jealous of her hairstyle, or ... when her dress went up in flames, or ... she made a halfway decent shot with an arrow. And not when Peeta made you like her."

Katniss' jaw was locked tight, but her steely eyes didn't raise to look at anyone, not even Haymitch.

"I like you all to think of one moment," he said, rubbing at his grey stubble, "where she made you feel something real."

Effie's hand immediately went up and she exclaimed, smooth as silk, "When she volunteered for her sister at the Reaping."

Finally, Katniss lifted her head and stared at Effie. Her mouth twitched into a hint of a smile.

"Excellent, Effie," he approached the whiteboard and took a pen. In his scribbly handwriting, he wrote, Volunteer for sis.

Bex watched the way Haymitch paced around the room, how his hands said so much more than his actual words. She had always been told Haymitch Abernathy was nothing more than a drunk, a Victor so tormented by his past that the only way to drown out his memories was to drink them away. But ... he clearly wasn't drunk here. He was sober. Must be another one of Coin's rules.

Which, in this case, wasn't a bad thing, but ... the President was certainly hellbent on following a system. It reminded Bex of Snow in a way, except way less lethal.

Maybe she was giving her too much credit.

"Oh!" Effie said, shooting up her hand again. Bex blinked and brought herself back to the conversation as the former escort began flailing her hands. "When she sang that song for little Rue. So precious."

"Who didn't get choked up at that," Haymitch crooned, writing, Song for Rue, on the board.

Beetee spoke, "When she chose Rue for an ally as well."

Phoenix nodded. "Agreed."

Bex sat up in her chair, surprised to find her own mouth opening, the words spilling out, "When she demanded the rescue of my brother and Peeta. I won't forget that."

Haymitch pointed in her direction with the pen and wrote down her answer. When she looked over at Katniss, the girl's stormy eyes held nothing but kindness. It was a rare sight for Katniss Everdeen.

"Now, what do all these have in common?" Haymitch asked the room.

"She went with her gut. She did what she felt was right," Finnick muttered as it dawned on him.

"Unscripted, yes," Beetee added. "So maybe we should just leave her alone."

Johanna tsked, "You should probably wash her face too. She looks middle-aged."

Effie scoffed. The smokey eyeshadow was obviously her idea.

"The opportunities for spontaneity are lacking below ground," Plutarch agreed. "So what you're suggesting is we ... toss her into combat? That sounds a little risky, don't you think?"

"I can't sanction putting an untrained civilian in battle just for effect. This is not the Capitol," Coin replied.

Bex cocked her head at that, but kept her mouth sealed.

Haymitch shook his head. "That is exactly what I'm suggesting. Put her on the field."

"We can't protect her," Coin argued.

"It has to come from her. That's what people respond to. You want a symbol for the revolution. She cannot be coached into it. Trust me, I've tried."

"Hey," Katniss warned. The first word she said in minutes of silence.

Plutarch suggested, "Maybe there's some place less dangerous," and looked to Coin.

Everyone was turning to the President now, waiting for her call. Bex had to admit, sending Katniss onto a battlefield was risky, especially when she was the symbol for their cause. But she had survived two Games already. Bex was pretty sure her, out of everyone in this room, could protect herself.

Not to mention, alive or dead, she was still a symbol that would be remembered.

Bex didn't want to think about a girl so young, so plagued by trauma, dying. Not when she still had so much life yet to live.

Finally, Coin said, "We won't be able to guarantee her safety."

"You'll never be able to guarantee my safety," Katniss snapped, facing the President. "I wanna go."

"And if you're killed?"

Katniss shrugged. "Make sure you get it on camera."

Plutarch released a breathy chuckle as Coin let her head fall into her hands. The board room was engulfed in silence once again. The President rubbed at her eyes before finally scanning the room again. "Well, I guess it's settled then," she exhaled. "I'll look into which Districts aren't being heavily attacked and report back to those I want on the mission. For now," Coin faced Katniss, deadpanned, "stay alive."

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The last thing Bex expected to see on a lazy afternoon was Johanna Mason's worried expression.

Bex was thoroughly enjoying Annie's cooking lesson. More than she thought she would. Annie had such a warm presence when she let her walls down, and unlike Bex, she seemed to have way more than the average person. Currently, Annie was attempting to teach her how to make fish pie. Bex had made the whole crust herself and paid attention to the ingredients Annie was putting in before they sealed it. She chopped up assorted fish pieces in a particular way, informing Bex that she hadn't the faintest clue how long the fish had been frozen, so they were taking their chances here.

"Coincidentally," Annie said, beginning to slice up the vegetables, "Finnick taught me how to make this. He has one of the best fish pie recipes ever." She hesitated for a moment, her knife wedged between a carrot, and she lifted her head to meet Bex's dark irises. "He – um – visited me recently. It was really nice to talk to him again and to hear he's doing well."

Bex smiled softly. "That's great to hear, Annie." She was astounded Finnick followed her advice.

Annie chopped the rest of the carrot and placed it into the pie. "He wouldn't stop talking about you," she giggled. "Are you two –"

Johanna came skirting around the corner and hurtled herself into the kitchen. The two older Victors turned with a start, faces twisting at the sight of a troubled Johanna. This couldn't be good.

"Oh, my gods!" She exclaimed. "I'm so glad I finally found you, Bex."

With a brow arched, Bex asked, "What's got you in a tizzy?"

Johanna swallowed hard. "It's Phoenix."

The whisk Bex had been clutching was suddenly clattering with the counter.

"He was imprisoned this morning with Effie for stealing more food than what was given to them. There's a whole prison assigned for torturing Capitol elite, even ones that Plutarch saved but Coin doesn't deem representable."

Bex had mixed emotions about torturing the Capitol people. They were equally part of the problem with the Games and Snow's rule, but still ... anyone who was saved didn't deserve to be tortured. There was no point in saving them in the first place.

Did Coin actually believe this was ethical?

"What?" She blinked twice. "Do you have any idea where they are?"

Johanna nodded. "I've heard the prisons are located in the west wing of the bottom floor."

Bex pinched the bridge of her nose and turned to Annie. She pulled her lips into the sweetest smile possible and said, "I think we'll have to cut this short."

"It's okay. Do what you need to do," Annie replied cheerily. "Just don't be surprised if I slip you a slice of fish pie later."

Bex placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it. Johanna was suddenly tugging on her hand. She hardly got a moment to say goodbye before her friend was pulling her out of the kitchens. Bex yanked her head away and pointed a stern finger in her face once they were out in the hallway. "Don't hold me like that again," she warned.

"Whatever," Johanna scoffed. "What's the plan?"

She smoothed out the lines in her jumpsuit. "Get Katniss and find Phoenix and the others imprisoned. Katniss has a lot of leeway around here. She'll be able to get them out. I'll go speak to Coin."

Johanna frowned. "She won't listen to you. She hardly even listens to Katniss."

"Have some faith in me," Bex said with a roll of her eyes. "I once had the entire Capitol fooled into loving me. I'll make her listen."

Bex stalked off in the direction of the elevator before Johanna could protest. The younger girl fled in the opposite direction, in search of Katniss. Bex practically pounded her fist onto the buttons, closing the elevator and taking her up to the top floor. Her whole body was bubbling with rage, simmering underneath her scars and skin. Whatever game Coin was playing here, it was unfair, and certainly wasn't going to make the Victors trust her any more.

The elevator came to a screeching stop and Bex hauled the door open. She stomped across the bridge, where Plutarch stood in front of the doors to Coin's board room. He was tapping his foot impatiently, clearly waiting for a sliver of her time.

"Hey," he said, noticing Bex's angry frown, "what are you –"

She lightly shoved him out of the way and barged into the board room, finding Coin at the head of the table. She was watching old videos of bombings in various Districts. Bex could see on the projection in front of them that each piece of footage was categorized according to District. She was shocked to notice that Coin was watching a video of Seven, and Bex turned away, not wishing to see it.

"You realize it's rude to barge into a room without an invitation," Coin said, sinking back in her chair, "especially when a President is involved."

"Rude? You wanna talk rudeness?" Bex's brows pulled together. "How about you explain why your trusted stylists, Phoenix and Effie, and a bunch of other Capitol elite are stuck in a prison right now?"

Coin's expression was bored. It made Bex's hands form into fists. "They stole food. That cannot go unpunished."

"I stole food once too. Are you going to punish me?"

"No, you're a Victor –"

"You can't pick and choose who can abide by the rules and who can't."

"Actually, I can," she smiled smugly. "I run Thirteen."

Bex relaxed her hands, trying to relieve the tension coursing through her body. "You need to release them and all of the Capitol people imprisoned. This is wrong. Phoenix and Effie were just hungry –"

The wrinkles creased in the corner of Coin's eyes. "It's a crime. Not just wrong."

"What about the other Capitol elite that are in there for seemingly no reason? You can't save people and then detain them. What's the point?"

The President paused. She looked to her small cuticles, as if this conversation was tedious to her. Bex tried her best to calm her anger, but it difficult when Coin clearly didn't care what she said.

"It's a little funny," the President said, lips pulling into a sneer, "that the people you're trying to protect never once cared if you lived or died in the Games. They just wanted you to look pretty."

That wasn't true. She and Phoenix were friends. He cared about her, but he always had a job to do. They were all struggling to survive in Panem.

"President Coin, if I may be frank," Bex hesitated, placing her hand on the back of a chair. "Snow is out there right now holding innocent people hostage, and the most energy you exert is putting a couple of Capitol people in a prison for stealing food?"

Coin lifted her pale grey eyes then. She studied the fury and pain etched all over Bex's face. "Fine, you've made your point." She stood from her chair and walked over to the Victor, slow as ever. "I'll let them out on a warning, as long you start pulling your weight around here."

Her brow narrowed. "What are you talking about? I go to the kitchens every day. I do my chores."

"You're still recovering, Miss Nassar. I understand. You might be recovering your whole life. But even so, as a Victor, you need to be putting in more of an effort around here. Your presence in Thirteen is futile." Coin paused, watching Bex's lips purse with uncertainty. She laced her hands in front of her.

"I've chosen District Seven for Katniss' propaganda visit," she proceeded. "The District was, for the most part, wiped out after your betrayal in the Quarter Quell, but there are still some buildings left standing. Old factories being used as hospitals. Heavy bombing was reported last week, but so far, I think I can deem it as our safest option." The President placed her hands on Bex's shoulders. "I would like it if you accompanied the team and visited the rebels encampment."

"Like you said, Seven is all but destroyed. How does it benefit anyone by me being there? I'm not the star of these propos." Bex shrugged and looked behind her at the paused video on the projection. "The District doesn't look anything like it used to. I wouldn't know my way around –"

"But you know the people and the land. Katniss must know them too if we want our propos to be powerful." Coin's hands slipped away. "We need more people to know our cause, Miss Nassar, more people to stand up."

Bex leaned back. Her jaw clenched slightly.

"They embark tomorrow at nine AM," Coin quipped, walking back to her chair. Once she was seated, she raised her head and smiled. "Get a good rest tonight. You'll need it."

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A/N: oooooooo here we go with some more canon changes! (expect a lot more lol. I changed the plot of MOCKINGJAY a little bit. 🤭) instead of going to district 8, katniss and the propo crew will be going to 7 with bex accompanying them! I did this mainly because I thought it didn't matter which district they went to and for bex to see what her home really looks like now. all in the name of character development 🤩