Bobby – The Change of Life

My mother and father were proud of me for making Second Lieutenant. I loved my dad and mom very much. My mom was very tired and in pain. She fell asleep one night and didn't wake up, The doctor said she was riddled with cancer.

My dad grieved severely and consequently he died with a stroke a week later. I grieved to the point of tears. After extended leave I went back to Lackland AFB for flight school.

The words of Kulabta haunted my soul to where the line of reasoning troubled my conceptions. They were seared in my brain waves. I was cursed and I would suffer loss and anguish in any loving relationship I attempted and enjoyed. Did that include my family. Is she an evil witch? She couldn't be, but maybe...

My thoughts were flickering from one crazy consideration to another explanation. I could not concentrate. When I returned to Lackland AFB. I had received a letter from Kulabta. I was full of joy. The envelope was addressed in English, but the letter inside was in Thai script. I could read printed Thai, but written Thai was beyond my comprehension.

I had two Thai buddies in flight school help me translate the letter. I could tell by their eyes that they were hesitant about converting the letter into English. I told them I was a big boy, and I could take it no matter how bad it was! It's message was, "I have no heart for you. Please write me no more. I no love you. I hate you. Kulabta."

My heart was crushed. She made it clear she wanted nothing concerning me. I was hoping she would relent. Anger was swelling up within me. Rage surged throughout my whole body. I left the building and smashed my fists against the brick wall. I hit the wall so hard that I knocked a hole in it.

My hands hurt. I don't think I broke anything, other than the wall. I went to the latrine and washed the blood from my hands. I retrieved a bottle of peroxide from my room, and poured it over my bloody knuckles. The ache was worse than hitting the building, but the essence of my being ached beyond repair. My heart was pounding. My muscles tighten. My body was inflamed.

The next day my hands hurt, but not as much as the day before. However, the pain was not as bad as when I was practice punching in my early Muay Thai instruction. I worked out harder and longer.

Additionally, the pain in my heart and mind was worse. Kulabta many times. Her only reply was that she hated me, and not to write her again. I felt defeated. I had written a letter a day for five months. My mind was tossing like a tornado.

The lead flight instructor asked for a show of hands of those that had a pilot's license. I extended my hand. He asked me what kind of plane I flew. I told him that it was a Cessna 172 similar to the Cessna T-41 that the Air Force uses for beginning students.

Furthermore, I expressed that I had instrument training for night flying, and had logged over 1500 hours on the Cessna while working for my instructor's license. I acknowledged that I had flown a twin engine but was not certified.

The lead flight trainer motioned for one of the other instructors and whispered in his ear. That individual came over and tapped my shoulder and motioned that we needed to leave. While in the hall he said, "We need to check out your flying ability."

He led me to a Cessna T-41and said, "Get in." I told him that I never taken a plane out without going over the safety check list. Seeming surprised, he smiled and produced a check sheet. We went over each item together.

Then he repeated, "Get in." I did and asked him whether he wanted a fast takeoff, or a slow takeoff. "Fast." We did several turns, rollovers and stalls, and came back to the flight center. The instructor gave the leader a thumbs-up.

I walked into the flight center, and was informed to report to the commander, who probed me about the type of aircraft I would like to fly. I said, "As a crew chief, I am familiar with the C-47 Gooney Bird and the C-130 Hercules. I would like to fly either or both." Alright, come back and see me at 1500 hours.

I arrived at 1500 hours and received orders to report to Chanute AFB in thirty days for training. In the meantime I was on leave. My Dad and I had built an airplane. The only thing it needed was an engine.

We had purchased a new 172 Cessna engine, but had not mounted it. Since my sisters sold mom and dad's home after their deaths, it was now in an old barn at Dad's fifth cousin Rufus Olander's farm. I called Rufus and informed him I would be stationed at Chanute AFB for advance pilot training, and would it be alright to work on the airplane in his older barn.

He said, "You're Junior, Bobby's boy. We used to hunt together when you were a kid. I remember we use to have fun together. Sorry about your dad." I said, "Yes sir, thank you."

I informed him that I'm driving, and would be there in two days. Rufus indicated that I was welcomed to stay at his house. He advised me that his wife Martha would cook up a storm, and that she'd be pleased to put some meat on me. I resolved to myself that I would keep busy and not dwell on the past. I would complete the plane, and build up my Fraternal Fear techniques.

Rufus apprised me that I'd stay in Rusty's room while he was away in the Army. He explained Le Ann was a senior at the University of Illinois. I imparted Le Ann didn't like me much in high school. Rufus said that Le Ann has grown up and has a boyfriend in college. I wondered if she was still a little skinny pest.

After I arrived at Rufus' home, I heard someone crying in the kitchen. Once I entered, it became apparent that Le Ann was overflowing with tears. Clearly her boyfriend had run off and married her best friend, and the senior dance was that evening.

I was hoping Le Ann would not ask me to take her to the dance. After all, I had been driving for two days. Martha said, "Bobby Junior is here. He will take you to the senior dance. Won't you Bobby?" I looked at Le Ann and realized she was a beautiful woman with tears running down her face. I was a sitting duck when it came to crying women.

I said, "I'd be honored to escort Le Ann to the dance, if she'll have me?" I was trusting Le Ann would say, "No!" She looked at me in my Air Force dress blues as if to say, "Who are you?" I answered, "I'm your distant cousin that you use to pester in high school, Bobby Olander." I continued, "All I have to do is change to a white dress shirt and a black bowtie and I'll be ready."