⋆⭒˚.⋆

It had been the longest afternoon of Aerea's life. She had arrived in her chambers in a fit of rage, Sassa and Dusca had been on their feet in an instant to assist her. The sophisticated red dress was replaced with a white fluttering blouse and a leather bodice laced at one side adorned with a dark red embroidery. Before leaving, Sassa had placed a brown cape over the princess' shoulders.

Area and Sassa spent the day exploring the market place, scouting for new attractions. More the handmaid rather than the dragoness. Sassa would drag her from stall to stall and comment on the beautiful trinkets exposed, the scarfs and creamy silks at the tip of their fingers. They smelled the spices and talked to the merchants on how to use them properly in each dish, and some would even explain how the base was extracted.

A lot of new faces circulated in the market, which had Ser Goswin on high alert. Thankfully nothing with bad intent happened, they just wandered and Aerea thought of the fight.Why was she always so ugly?

The man had been kind, considerate, and Aerea always answered with violence. That had been the language men understood best in her experience; because if the lady was proper or nice, they would always perceive it as an invitation. Seized her waist when she politely declined dancing, whispered in her ear after being denied a kiss, stealing the book Aerea was reading to gain her attention... She hated the eyes of men, too greedy and vulgar. Thus Aerea started screaming when they wouldn't leave her alone, pushing if they hugged her too tight, she was mean and explosive by her teenage years because it worked.

For last, they left her alone.

Sassa went to grab some almond cakes, asking the princess to hold for a minute, she sat by a fountain and Ser Goswin stood next to her. She circled a finger through the water over her reflection.

''Princess Aerea?''

''Ser Goswin.''

''What pains you?''

''My soul, perhaps.''

Ser Goswin shifted in place, she looked up at him from the corner of her eye. The knight turned his head left and right, maybe trying to ignore the situation at hand, Aerea lowered her head again. Sassa came back, sitting next to the princess and surprisingly the knight joined them.

''I doubt your soul carries such a burden, my lady.'' Sassa handed the others a cake, they accepted and Ser Goswin continued speaking. ''At least, nothing you won't be able to exonerate.''

Princess Aere felt like a little girl again, staring at the ground and a cake untouched between her fingers. Something to make her feel better but unfortunately she didn't have the stomach for it.

''I'm afraid it's not up to me, solemnly.''

''You give the lord no credence, my lady. Nartaelos are creatures of ashes, the soul amends.''

She snapped her head in his direction, frowning. ''I never knew what those words mean...''

''And may you never have to,'' Sassa said.

The sudden intervention had Aerea intensifying her frown. The knight kept talking as if what the other said wasn't strange or cryptic, maybe he understood. Maybe renascence was some kind of communal experience around those parts, she had never seen anyone talk about death the way the Dreimunt folk did. One had to be there to fathom the idea.

''I am nothing but your servant, princess. If I may, convey to your husband freely. I have known him since infancy, we grow side by side, and... I know even if he doesn't understand, he will try, he will listen.''

The party ate their snack in silence. The sun began to set when Aerea heard a familiar whistle, she studied the sky of blue hues changing to orange tones. However, she could barely see what lay over the castle on the hill so she glanced around noting the faces of the folk. They seemed curious as well, some in awe, did they catch some glimpse Aerea was too slow to? A powerful howl punched through the heavens, Aerea got up in a jump.

Hydriax. No, no, no, no! The princess broke out running through the crowd. At first Ser Goswin and the handmaid were caught off guard, yet as the princess carried on up the mountain her stamina failed her little by little. She could not see much, even less of what could be arriving in the arena, the view was blocked by the walls around the city.

Somehow the Targaryen didn't need the confirmation. In her heart, wretched, wretched heart, Aerea could already picture what she would find. Nonetheless, she sprinted and tripped on her white skirts.

By the time she reached the gates, Aerea's breathing was a mess and her golden hairs glued to her face due to sweat and spit in the corner of her mouth. The calls of Ser Goswin went unheard and forgotten to the back of her mind, even the dampness of her dress didn't faze her. Aerea did not stop until she was in front of the great hall. She barged in to see the plates being sorted on top of the table as well as the cutlery, the servants paused at the sight of her fury but her blaze didn't linger at them much longer. Instead, Aerea's lilac eyes traveled to the fireplace where her brother and her husband were, they had their backs to her and whatever they were talking about was muffled by the sizzling of the fires.

Sensing the tension, Vanarr turned looking straight into her eyes. He told the servants to clear the room for a moment, they headed out with their faces casted down as if Aerea's gaze would transform them into stone figures.

Aerea addressed her brother first. His white threads arranged in sloppy braids, and dirty with ash and blood she figured. He had not taken off his armor, like he had traveled here right off a battle. ''What do you think you're doing?''

''Prince Daemon is our guest.'' Vanarr provided.

''You come here after months, almost a year! So long you haven't shown your face, Daemon, and now you come here expecting what exactly? Helping hand? A dragon to burn what yours couldn't so far?''

''Aerea, that's enough.''

''What about you take flight and do what you do best? Disappear, because we're not participating in your fruitless war!''

The anger was so blinding that Aerea only took note of Vanarr when he stepped in front of her and captured her shoulder between his big hands. He hadn't said anything yet and the princess scowled looking at him; his face was determined and rigid and his deep purple eyes had frozen over, almost muted. Very unlike her Vanarr. The princess shook him off of her as the realization washed over her, like a stab in the back.

''You...'' She said.

''I've decided...''

And the knife twisted right in her kidney, Aerea stepped back in pain. She glared between the man and Daemon who had a shit-eating grin on his lips, like a child that won upon the judgemental eye of a parental figure. ''You two decided.''

''Aerea,'' Daemon started but she didn't give him a chance to explain. The beast in her jumped at his face, pointing a finger and shouting at the top of her lungs.

''Don't you dare speak another word! You who started a war out of pride, you'll drag us down with you.'' Again her husband tried to be the barrier between the siblings. He had a calming hand up to smooth her but it only made her madder. ''No, no! No!''

Aerea pushed him and left wobbling a bit, her head hurt suddenly and everything seemed so disconcerting. In her rage, Aerea saw the path to the room bare and empty, she supported her height on the back of a chair and took several shallow breaths to cool off her blood.

She should've kept guard of the big window.

''Aerea.''

The bones on her flesh shuddered and she had to elevate her face as to not allow any water to fall from the corner of her eyes, the voice of her husband was meant to be consoling. However, Aerea Targaryen felt it like mockery.

''Leave me.''

''Let me explain myself.''

''No need, you decided. You decided without consulting me.''

The man laughed, it was the cruelest thing he could've done. ''On my word, I expect you would react with more gleam.''

''And why would I?'' Aerea snapped, face peeking over her shoulder.

''Mhm... to see me gone.''

The princess withdrew from the chair, quick feet delivering her right to Vanarr's side. She opened her mouth to scream some more but the strength abandoned her suddenly, so Aerea stood there looking at Vanarr. Trying to grasp at the strange circumstances, the day of her wedding Aerea had prayed to the gods the groom would vanish so it was the dream come true. A few moons ago, she would be concealing her satisfaction and conceal it with false tears.

It was poetic at best. That the first time Aerea got what she wanted, she didn't want it anymore. Because for over a moon Aerea kept looking through the big window and hoping no one would take her husband away.

''I don't want you to go. What am I supposed to do?''

''I will send a raven to my brother, he is at Oldtown but he...''

The princess shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. She grasped his fingers tightly fixed on making him understand but the words were as barbs in her throat. ''What do I do if you...''

He had his inquiring eyes set on the woman's nails digging at his skin, she regretted the action upon seeing the red marks she was leaving. She was rough and wrong, everything the common decency and Court had condemned; but for those ideals she would not budge an inch. The gods and decency could suck it, the Court and the King would have to leave with her ínferno, she was not meant to please everyone. Yet as Vanarr embraced her hands in a tender hold and pulled them to his lips, Aerea wished she could be soft and sweet.

She wished so as to repay him one day. Vanarr was more man than dragon with his warm blood and kind indigo eyes.

''I wished I could stay,'' he spoke in a whisper. ''The War for the Stepstones is a complex ordeal, the control of that area could rule the fate of the people. Our people. I just... could not live with myself if I overlook a call for help.''

Nodding the princess was overcomed by an immense dolefulness, a hollow darkness in place for what had been snatched from her chest. Perhaps that was what differentiated them. Targaryens and Nartaelos. She would have no issue letting the world succumb as long as she would be fine watching high above.

''A complex ordeal,'' Aerea chuckled. ''Do you fancy me an idiot?''

''I do not, no.'' The answer was accompanied with a soft smile. ''It is rather to persuade myself.''

Aerea Targaryen moved the thumb over the back of his hand, she did not press her claws although the thought of letting go terrified her. As she lifted her gaze, gathering the courage to let herself be seen so vulnerable, Aerea pleaded silently and a tear rendered down her cheek. In response the man pulled her close, drying the tears on his tunic, he whispered reassuring messages into her ear but she was tempted to believe. Without realizing she was tugging at his clothes and her cries became painful for a moment, usually she would have been embarrassed to act on her emotions. Yet the princess could not bring herself to care as she noted the smattering of shocked sobs coming out of Vanarr; she did not feel so alone.

There was so much left unsaid. Aerea wanted to tell him to be safe, to come back in one piece but every request was redundant. In place of the obvious, Aerea backed away from his chest and just stared at his features, to later set in stone in the back of her mind. She clinched to Vanarr, his tunic, his neck and aroma, and then dragged her fingernails from where his hairline sprouted to the back of his head. He retorted with a pointed look, not disapproving but rather bewildered at the touch.

She pulled him down to her level. Then Aerea kissed him, and Vanarr let himself be shuffled into their bed.

⋆⭒˚.⋆

Vanarr woke the next day in a mess of blankets, the coverlet nowhere to be found. He rose but the weight of his wife prevented him from leaving, he paused to regain full consciousness. With the greatest care, Vanarr detangled from her and collected the clothes scattered through the floor placing them in a single corner. He got dressed and left the room, closing the door so as to not disturb Aerea's rest.

He passed by a window and caught a glimpse of the red dragon. The next logical halt would be the great hall, in which he found Daemon being provided with a big meal. The prince did not regard his arrival, probably entranced by the food, but the steward did.

''My lord.''

''Carden, Prince Daemon,'' he saluted. Despite not speaking a word back, Vanarr was acknowledged by the prince with a grunt. ''I hope you haven't been awaiting me in here, Prince Daemon.''

''Been up all night.'' Daemon said, and the quip at him did not go unnoticed. ''Fortunately your staff was the most hospitable and showed me into a room.''

Vanarr nodded and sat on an armchair next to the guest. The steward asked the lord if he would like to break his fast to which Vanarr agreed. Thus the pair was left alone, and Daemon didn't waste time to ask.

''Did you change your mind yet?''

''Why would you ask such a thing? Do you believe me to be a man without principles?''

The Rogue Prince chuckled to himself. ''Not at all. Except women have their ways.''

Vanarr shook his head and kept his face locked, he realized it was not the reaction the prince expected. Something about that statement did not sit right with Vanarr, he just didn't like what it implied. It was time to let his ego get the best of him though.

He didn't allow it to get to him during the meal, or when he was packing and preparing Hydriax to fly. He remained centered when saying farewell to the staff, the lord wrote a letter and urged it to be sent to Rhaemorr in short order. However, as he stood in front of his chambers the doubts creeped up from their hiding. Vanarr knocked.

No answer for a beat, then two. He decided to enter, the breakfast he had sent was sent by the table. Untouched.

On the other hand, Aerea had his back to him, looking through the balcony.

''Are you leaving?''

''Shortly, yes.''

''Can I go with you?''

''I'm afraid not.''

''Because I'm a woman?''

No, because he wouldn't be able to live with himself. Vanarr preferred to die than let any evil come upon her, it was the most pathetic truth he had realized the day before.

''Someone has to stay.''

''Rhaemorr will come at your word.''

The man approached the window, he stopped when Aerea was by his side. He maintained some distance in case she wasn't in the mood for any type of proximity.

''Yes, well... He will come to aid you.'' From his peripheral vision, Aerea angled her head to shoot him a glare. Most likely in disdain. ''But you are the Lady of Dreimunt. I trust my ancestral home to you.''

Vanarr turned to meet her, she had water piling up and she visibly swallowed her sorrow. He offered a hand, extending it to her range; the princess considered with pain, ire and sadness written all over her features. The muscle of her spasmed, Aerea's hand hesitated but eventually they were holding each other.

Minds and hands clasped but bodies so further apart.

NOTES

heyy! just Aerea trying to come to terms with one's feeling while upset and 'fuck you Vanarr for leaving me when I clearly asked you to stay'. honorable men are just the worst, am I right? And they never get a happy ending 😈

also stay tuned to find out if I ever dare to write a sexy scene. so far, sexy scene 1 and me 0

anyways, have some kisses and please send some back at me <3 I've been needing them tbh <3 <3 let me know what you think, byeee