Percy: "I beheaded Medusa with a glass orb and a pen."

Annabeth: "And your girlfriend's brain."

Gover: "And your best friend with his flying shoes."

Percy: "I defeated the Minotaur with its own horn and a pen."

Grover: "Okay, that's accurate."

Percy: "I fought Luke Castellan and his army of monsters in the Sea of Monsters armed with only a ballpoint pen."

Annabeth: *ahem*

Percy: "And my awesome girlfriend. But I dueled with the Titan Atlas with a pen."

Artemis: "For about ten seconds before I stepped in, boy."

Percy: "I fought through the Labyrinth with a mechanical spider and a pen."

Rachel: "I fended off Kronos with a hairbrush."

Percy: "Well, I saved the world at the Battle of New York with this pen."

Everyone: *glares*

Percy: "And a dagger. And Luke's last-minute regret. And an army of demigods..."