"No, are you okay?"

Joseph kissed his teeth and let go, turning his head away and refusing to look at him. That was a new, and it hurt. The brown-haired boy cared about him quite a bit, but this was a serious matter.

Jericho reached up to get a closer look at his face, but the other grabbed hold of his wrist, and it certainly didn't feel like he was going to let go anytime soon.

"Jericho."

That was his second warning today, he wasn't having it, though.

"Joey, please?"

He was begging now, an unfamiliar feeling settling into the pit of his stomach. The other boy grumbled something incoherent but dropped it after a few moments, stuffing them into his pockets.

Jericho pushed off his locker to stand in front of him, pulling his hood the rest of the way off, and cradled his face softly in both hands, assessing the damage.

"There's my baby..."

His nose was grayish-blue and sensitive to any sort of pressure. He flinched away even though he didn't touch it directly, and it was definitely bruised, but it didn't look or feel fractured.

Chin seemed ok as well, but he didn't know for sure because A: he's not a doctor and B: his beard was still hiding the extent of the damage down there. His cheeks and ears were steadily turning rosy as well, but he knew that had nothing to do with his injuries.

"Did you get it checked out at the hospital?"

He shook his head no, "My mom..." exhaled, "Nah, I've broken it before, this hurts but way less, just sprained. My jaw is sore too, but I'm tough, 's nothin' I can't work with." and then attempted a smile.

Joseph cut himself off, but he knew he wouldn't tell him. Jericho let go of his face, wasn't going to worry himself even more than he already was about asking either, especially not right now.

He'd hoped that the taller boy would say something eventually but, he wanted to know who the hell thought it was okay to punch him first. He had a few theories, none of them favorable.

"Toughest guy I know." He said it fondly, tried smiling too, worry still ripping through him "Have you been icing it? Was it one of those Northview fuckers?"

He paused,"...Yes, and no, somethin' like that, though. Caught me at a bad time, is all; I swung first, and they got a few hits in. I wasn't thinkin' too much about it. I'm fine, don't worry."

Jericho folded his arms across his chest and scowled.

"You look like you got hit by an eighteen-wheeler, and you're telling me not to worry about it? Can you really blame me for wanting to know what happened—?"

"Sunshine," he said softly, grabbing his elbows and uncrossing them, reaching up to smooth out the tension in his shoulders and neck too, "thank you so much. I'm good, okay? I don't wanna talk about it anymore, so drop it."

His last warning. Joseph wasn't asking.

"Joey..." he rubbed his eyes, beginning to feel a dull throb but in his chest this time, "Ok. Just—promise me you'll be careful if you play tonight?" The blond nodded, so he stood on his toes and held the other side of his face, leaning in to kiss and then hug him carefully. "I'll see you later, love you."

He figured that Joseph's expression matched his own, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, but he couldn't bring himself to look. The shorter boy stepped out of his now loose arms, grabbed his binder and books, and then bolted down the hallway instead.

The words just slipped out right out of his mouth like melted buttercream. Like it was something he always said to him, a term he often used like it was natural. Was it? Is that what this was supposed to be? Love? As a friend? No. As a best friend? Doubt it.

They'd passed the threshold for platonic love a long time ago. He doesn't even know what "regular" love feels like, so how in the world is he supposed to know if he loves him or not?

Love was complicated when the abuse he suffered distorted his ability to trust that the way he's feeling isn't just a result of trauma. This was different from Ezekiel's "love," drastically different from how he felt when he told his abusive ex those same few words.

That moment felt like the right time to say it, so he did, now he just wanted the ache in his chest to go away. But, how long has he denied himself?

How much longer was he going to act like what was right in front of his face wasn't there? So that he could continue to numbly drift along in this fantasyland where they'd never be anything more than friends?

It was harder to admit that he loved him than pretending that he didn't. Because if this is what love really feels like, insufferable pain when the other person is hurting and there's nothing he can do about it? Jericho didn't know if he liked it or not.

He needed to text Abel now; she promised to stay after school with him until the game started anyway. Angelica was one of the rare few that hated Joseph's guts, and Cadence just didn't trust him.

Still bothered by old rumors now that he'd thought about it. So, he couldn't text either of them about this, they'd been slowly drifting apart ever since he and Joseph started hanging out more anyway.

——————————————————————————-----------

Joseph was in a daze up until the pep rally at the end of the school day. Half-assed his classwork, zoned out during lectures, and if Michael hadn't been there to elbow him in the ribs, Coach Williams would've given him an earful about paying attention.

It was challenging to focus on anything, really, the whole incident? Ordeal? He didn't know what to call it; kept replaying in his head on a loop.

"I'll see you later, love you." Love you? Love you?!

He'd said it, and before him nonetheless. At first, he was fucking elated. As a matter of fact, he was tempted to chase him down and make him repeat it just to make sure he wasn't hearing things. But once he'd got off cloud nine, it was a downward spiral from there.

Doubt was one hell of an emotion too because the difference between "love you" and "I love you" suddenly began to bother the hell out of him. Joseph screwed up, though; he still couldn't bring himself to tell the other about his brother.

He'd been lying to him about almost everything his family did for years, years, but the blond got all bent out of shape over an ex-best friend with attachment issues? What version of himself did Jericho actually love? The burning sensation that began creeping into his eyes pissed him off even further.

Joseph closed them and then leaned his head back against the short locker behind him. The coach had been rambling on and on about the game against Northview for the last 20 minutes, and he knew staring at the blinding sheen of sweat on his tawny-brown bald head wasn't good for his eyes.

He was hyper-focused on keeping the tears from leaving his ducts, the blond was an intense guy, and he wasn't ashamed to admit that his emotions matched that. Crying after winning tournaments and championships was something he often did; they'd all seen it.

But, sobbing over his not-boyfriend in front of the team during a pre-game pep rally? Not something he particularly wanted to do. The makeup that Jessica put on his nose before second block, to hide the bruises from Mr. Williams, would probably get ruined as well.

And, well, that was the only thing keeping his ass off the bench for this game; either way, it didn't matter. If they wanted to win, he wouldn't sit him out. He figured he'd save himself an argument with the coach, though.

"Turner!"

He peeled his eyes open and saw the older man glaring from across the locker room. A couple of the other boys started snickering too but shut up quickly when they made eye contact.

"Taking an afternoon nap?" He crossed his arms over his chest, clipboard in hand, "If I'm boring you, by all means, feel free to leave." And, then jammed his thumb in the direction of the door.

"No, sir. Sorry 'bout that. He tried rubbing the water out of his eyes without hurting his nose, "didn't get much sleep last night, won't happen again."

Still eyeing him suspiciously, he added, "Get your shit together and open your ears, Turner. We can't lose this game, we're counting on you."

He nodded, and the man started talking again. Joseph managed to drown out his voice for the rest of the meeting and keep his eyes open simultaneously. He waited for Michael to gather his flashcards as soon as Mr. Williams dismissed them to get ready for the spirit assembly.

"Mike, it's just a pep rally. Why do you have a speech prepared again?"

The green-haired boy snatched his cards off the bench and re-arranged them, "I failed public speaking twice, man. You already know this. I get anxiety and shit speakin' in front of all them people." Stuffed the peach-colored cards in his pocket and grabbing his backpack, "Only reason I'm captain is that you ain't wanna worry 'bout doing all them dumbass speeches." And shoved the taller boy with a laugh. "Fuck outta here."

The blond smiled a little at Michael's attempt to lighten the mood. He'd already texted him about Jericho; he was the only other person he could tell that wouldn't look at him like he had a few screws loose.

Jacobi and Michael's dad, Tarel, have known each other for over twenty years, and their moms are best friends and work at the same clinic.

So, it was pretty much inevitable that Joseph and Micheal became friends. They weren't as close as people would expect of two guys who've known each other for all their lives, though. Their relationship was more of a mutual agreement. Joseph would tell him if he had some shit going on and vice-versa.

"Couldn't have said it better myself."

Daniel waited for the both of them by the door; they followed the rest of the team out into the hallway that connected the weight room, locker rooms, and mat room to the gymnasium and then into it.

Most of the other fall sports teams, cross country, soccer, volleyball, and the others were already seated in their respective sections on the bleachers. The cheerleaders were practicing their routine for the pep rally in the center.

Many heads turned, friends from other sports called out for their friends on the team, and girlfriends winked and blew kisses. As cliché as it was, most of the meatheads on the football team currently date or dated the girls on the cheer team.

The twins being the only exception. They were off limits, it was always "the twins" or "the Johnsons" to everybody at school. Their dad was one of Jacobi's business partners, so he's known them for a minute too.

They were opposites as far as personality went, though. Both girls were smart as hell, but Johanna or J.J. was the quiet and sarcastic one, whereas Jessica was the cocky, "I was born 15 minutes before you" stubborn, bratty sister.

He preferred the company of Johanna over her older sibling any day and was good friends with her. Jessica, on the other hand, was the one that's always had a bit of a thing for him, and she made it painfully obvious on purpose. It didn't help that they used to mess around either.

The funny part was, Johanna had even told him she just found herself stuck in the crossfire most of the time, only going along with her sister's little ploys either out of pure boredom or Jessica promising to pay her.

"Jojo!"

He cringed, it was the same nickname they both used on him when they were kids. He knew it was Jessica, though and as much as he wanted to pretend like he didn't hear anything, he couldn't bring himself to ignore the overly affectionate voice.

She was usually kind, to him at least, and she had helped him cover the big ass bruise on his nose after all. So, he looked for short magenta hair in the sea of blonde and dyed blonde that was the cheer team.

Eventually, he spotted her, dropping his stuff off on their side of the gym and jogging over to the giggling group of girls, a few guys, and pom-poms in the middle of the gym

He smiled and winked in Johanna's direction and got a lazy grin in return; as soon as he turned his head back around, Jessica was jumping right onto him and holding his neck in a death grip.

She managed to dodge his nose just in time, but of course, she had to make a spectacle of everything. He wrapped his arms around her to both hug her back for a short while and then pry her off of his body.

"Hey, Jess."

The shorter girl pouted up at him but then grinned brightly, "Hi pumpkin! Sorry 'bout that, how's your nose feelin'?" reached up to touch him, but he leaned back just out of her reach.

"Feels a lil' better than it did yesterday, but it still hurts if I put pressure on it."

Another frown graced her face. She shook her head, "I am gonna kill that oversized asshole you call a brother for ruinin' your pretty face, I promise you that. If it makes you feel any better, I've never liked him."

They went back and forth like that until the bell rang, alerting the school to gather everyone into the gym for the last hour of the day. He said bye and went back over to sit down. It was pretty much a dog and pony show from there on out.