Demario's POV

The next day, I was in the spacious living room where my foster family, Jose, Gianna, Holly and her clan, the Tuckers, the Callaway duo, and even Mrs. Bermudez-Estrada were waiting for me with the Nguyen twins holding court. "Hello, Demario," Dr. Nguyen said as I sat down at the piano bench (where it was surprisingly designated for me since my sheet music folder was already set up at the piano as if someone was playing it. "I trust that you had a restful sleep after the circumstances from yesterday."

I nodded, feeling self-conscious about my meltdown and me cussing out to the ceiling that made me look and feel foolish. "I slept well," I replied. "And yesterday was a bit...well-"

"Emotionally exhaustive?" Judge McGillivray suggested.

"Yeah. I felt like a complete idiot ranting and raving like that-"

"Let me stop you right there, Demario," Holly interrupted, holding up a manicured hand. "What you were feeling was a meltdown that was in the making after dealing with pent-up emotions that you held back after your suicide attempt. And while you say it wasn't appropriate, we all could tell that this was long overdue for you."

My  eyes furrowed. "What?" I replied. "Guys, I-"

"Demario, listen," Gianna cut me off. "From what we already know, you've been conditioned to keep your feelings to yourself and to do what your told with little complaint. That may have worked when you're on the job and all that, but not when you've been stressed out from school, relationships, and even family. And in your case, you had to hold all your emotions in for the sake of making people happy, even the ones who don't deserve the time of day- the late Bader family and their relatives who all used and abused you, to be exact."

"Right," Jose hummed. "And after yesterday, you still like to play it off as something that shouldn't have happened. But in my book, Demario? You're only hurting yourself even more by ignoring the problems within you."

It was Taylor's turn to speak. "I may be no psychologist or anything, but even I know when someone's still lost in the five stages of grief," he said. "Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance- all part of the stages, boy. And right now, you're stuck in between anger and depression with you bypassing bargaining. You're mainly in anger because you haven't fully come to grips that the people who let you down over and over again still think that you're nothing but a nuisance. You've been an angry boy, Demario. Don't you think that it's time to finally be healed of everything?"

I sighed, knowing that he was right. "I am angry," I admitted. "I'm angry at myself for not being more assertive back then. I'm angry at myself for letting everyone walk over me. But most of all, I'm angry at myself because I felt like I couldn't please everyone."

"But that's not your job," Mitch piped up. They let you down, Demario, while you did everything right. That doesn't mean that it's your job to make them happy all the time. And you bottling up those emotions isn't healthy for you, to be honest. You needed to finally let everything out and finally let your mother have it on how you were mistreated. From where my brother and I stand, you finally speaking out isn't a crime but something that was long overdue."

"We all know how gifted you are," Holly's dad commented, gesturing to me at the piano. "And don't be mad or anything, but Gianna needed to hear your original music- the one that you left unfinished. It was cinematic and electrifying to my ears."

I felt my face heat up. "I didn't know that you all liked it, my unfinished music," I replied. "I was ready to just throw it away and just focus on my other pieces."

"In a hen's tush," Mr. Tucker barked. "That's one piece of music that I want to hear on the radio, son."

"Exactly," commented Mrs. Callaway, her husband and the band director nodding in assent. "But we understand on how it involves your former relatives and why you feel like it's never going to be enough."

I fought a bitter laugh. "Yeah," I replied. "It's mainly composed of bitterness and despair."

"Which could be a factor of your true emotions that could lead to a ray of hope for a brighter future," Javi pointed out. "Your other pieces are pretty cool, but the unfinished one could be something perfect for any concert hall."

"And I think that what you need right now is a good hour or two of musical therapy, starting with "Turning Tables" by Adele," suggested Dr. Nguyen.

My eyes went wide. "You mean that you guys want me to play the piano for you all, right now?" I exclaimed in disbelief. "You can't be serious."

"We're dead serious," Zoe commented, staring me down with her law-school persona. "Play some music for us. Give us the best of you."

Might as well, I thought to myself as I turned around to the ebony and ivory keys before taking a deep breath and beginning to play the first few bars of the British singer's sad song that was perfect for a rainy day. "Close enough to start a war," I began softly.

For the next two hours, I took in the requests of everyone who wanted me to play my heart out and let every single emotion that still lingered after yesterday transfer to my playing skill.

From Big Girls Cry by Sia ("Tough girl in the fast lane. No time for love, no time for hate. No drama, no time for hate. Tough girl, whose soul aches.")...

To Last Midnight from the Into the Woods musical ("It's the last midnight. It's the last wish. It's the last midnight. Soon it'll be 'Boom, squish.' Told a little lie, stole a little gold, broke a little vow, did you? Had to get your prince, had to get your cow. Had to get your wish, does it matter how. Anyway it doesn't matter now...")...

To Gone Already by Faith Evans ("If you ever love someone who never took the time to know you. Nothing that you say ever gets through. Listening but they don't hear you. You're just going through the motions, everything so monotonous. Baby, I'm just being honest. It was over before we started. I was gone already, gone already, At least now you're ready, but I already done been gone. I was gone already, gone already. At least now you're ready, but I already done been gone...).

All the while, I was playing my heart out with a fiery vengeance and everyone was sitting there watching me play as if I had all the time in the world. It felt like hours when I was wrapping up Out of My Head by John Newman, but it never felt so right. "To shut up feeling lonely, I get out of my head," I sang with conviction as I performed the chorus for the final time. "Lost everything around me, not dealing with it well. To shut up feeling lonely, I get out of my head. Why would you ever love somebody when love runs in in the end? When love runs in the end?"

I closed out with forlorn twist of the final few bars that sounded like the first bars from the opening of unfinished piece...as I began to just shut everything out and decided to play the entire thing without any objection. A warm feeling came over me as my mind began to be full of memories of staying with the Tuckers while the Baders were out partying and doing whatever- the smell of Mrs. Tucker's freshly-baked cinnamon rolls and other sweets as she taught me some of her favorite songs from the sixties while her daughters were watching with their friends and boyfriends, her husband even teaching me  some gospel hymns during Sunday afternoons while his wife was cooking up baked chicken and collards, and even the girls (Zoe in particular) getting me interested in pianized versions of the latest R&B hits.

And even as I was focused on the song right now, I felt like every emotion that I felt when I was stuck washing my brothers' football gear, cleaning after Shauntay and Camille while they were texting their boyfriends or whatever, dealing with Mr. Bader's complaints on his job, or how my mother would sneer at me when I came into her mix-matched living room. Even as I played my heart out, I knew that everyone was right.

I had given the people who I had to live with everything that I had...and it would never be enough.

They wouldn't be satisfied no matter what I did.

And now that I outlived Vivian Emmeline Ingram-Bader and her brood, it was time for me to move forward.

I stopped at the point where I should've been continuing- the mark where I never worked on since learning of the tragic car crash, my head bowing low as if lost in prayer.

Counting silently backwards from ten, I looked up and saw that everyone had happy tears in their eyes. "So, you guys, what do you think?" was the first thing I said. "Because after I finish this piece, I'm going to play it at the fall concert."

"Then you better get started," Mr. Callaway said. "Young man, that concert was one for the books. You make us proud, Demario Bader. Keep fighting for your right to be who you are."

I nodded. "Wish me luck," I replied. "Because I'm going to need it."

And THAT, dear children, is how you conclude a four-chapter arc of reality-checks and revelations! I was worried that this chapter and the last three would never be of this quality. But here it is in its glory!

With that said, all I can tell you is that we'll check in with Ryan and Theo as these boys have separate plans for Demario. And one of these boys has murder on his mind!

Songs mentioned in this chapter: "Turning Tables" by Adele, "Big Girls Cry," by Sia, "Last Midnight (from the "Into the Woods" Broadway musical), by Billy Porter, "Gone Already" by Faith Evans, "Church: Renewing Vows" by Wynton Marsalis, and "Out of My Head" by John Newman.

Vote.
Comment.
Share.
Follow.
Add.
FAN!