PRESENT

I double-check my appearance in the bathroom mirror for the millionth time, groaning at my obviously miserable reflection. I don't want to go out there and make small talk or pretend like I wouldn't rather be at home watching crime documentaries and scarfing down a bag of chips. I pull my phone out of my clutch and text Lenny again, despite all of my messages going unanswered.

Me: Stop ignoring me bitch! PLEASE get me out of this or I'll leave myself.

Finally, freaking finally, she replies like I knew she would. I should have threatened her from the start.

Lenny: You're so dramatic. It'll be an hour, tops. Just have some fun, thottie! I set this up months ago for YOU.

Me: Exactly. MONTHS AGO. Things have changed and I don't want to do this anymore.

Lenny: You've never wanted to do this and that's exactly why I meddled. It's just. One. Hour. GO.

Lenny: I'm turning my phone off. Love you. Bye!

Me: LENNY, PLEASE. Don't make me.

Me: ???

Me: I'm going to kill you.

I growl and put my phone back in my purse when I stop getting responses again. Someone knocks on the door and I cringe, realizing I've been hiding for the better part of ten minutes now.

"It's just one hour." I tell my reflection, smoothing out the non-existent wrinkles in my white blouse. I flatten down my hair gently, making sure not to disrupt how I've straightened it, and blow out a breath. "Just get it over with."

I nod one final time in self-encouragement and open the door, pausing when I catch the woman waiting for her turn eyeing me curiously. Her eyes flick behind me and it occurs to me she probably heard me talking to myself. Oh, whatever.

I offer her a tight smile and breeze out of the hallway, entering the main floor of the bar again. I stop in place and look around the mass of people, searching for my date.

That's right. I'm on a fucking date.

A blind date that Lenny set up for me as soon as we moved to Boston because she decided I needed to "get out there" and deemed Asher and I impossible. I bet she didn't count on us practically fucking with our clothes on two months after we got here. How's that for progress?

But Lenny insisted that I meet up with a dude she met at a get-together for tattoo artists in Boston and said he seemed like my type. She felt bad about cancelling on him when he seemed really excited to meet me and told me to go for the hell of it and maybe even walk out of this with a new friend. Besides, she'd forgotten about the date altogether and by the time this friend of hers texted her to confirm if it was still on, it was apparently too late to back out. So now I'm here and I'm trying not to look out of my element because I haven't been on a date in...well...for-fucking-ever and I'm really hoping it won't be obvious.

I take a look on my phone at the picture Lenny sent of my date tonight, Dylan. There's so many people here that it's hard to differentiate the face I'm looking for. It isn't until a tattooed arm pops up above the crowd and starts waving that I crane my head in that direction and find the face I'm looking for. I wave back and signal a finger to let him know I'll walk towards him. I take deep even breaths as I walk across the bar, the heels of my knee-high boots clacking behind me.

Relax. This isn't even a date. You'll let him know right away that you're not interested in anything besides friendship. How hard can it be?

"Hey." He smiles when I'm close enough to hear him.

"Hi." I smile back and he stands up from his seat to offer me a side-hug.

I awkwardly return it and pull away almost instantly. He motions for me to sit on the other side of the booth and I do just that, setting my jacket and bag down beside me. We share another smile but neither of us knows what to say. I want to cringe so fucking badly. This is already so weird.

He clears his throat, gesturing a hand in my direction. "You look very pretty."

"Thank you." I tuck my hair behind my ear, feeling self-conscious. "You look nice too."

Which is the truth. Dylan is the kind of cute that's hot. He has a natural baby face but he carries himself with confidence and—fine I'll admit it—he does seem like my type. With light brown hair that's cropped short on the sides and longer at the top, black square glasses that hide his gorgeous green eyes, an adorable smile, and a lean but muscled body obviously covered in tats, he's definitely attractive as hell. Women pass our booth when they walk by and eye him with clear interest. I'm not sure if Dylan is oblivious or if he's ignoring their looks out of respect to me but both options make him more appealing. Maybe this won't be so bad?

"Thanks." He grins and displays his nice white teeth. He also has full lips that look entirely kissable. Okay. This isn't so bad after all. Lenny could have picked someone a lot worse, I'll give her that.

"So, you're a tattoo artist?" I ask him as I start going through the menu. I'm just glad this bar offers something to eat because I'm starved, uncaring if I have to pig out in front of my date.

"Yeah." He mimics me and grabs a menu for himself. "For four years now but I've been drawing since I was a kid so it feels like I've been doing it for much longer."

"I wish I could draw. I couldn't even sketch a stick figure to save my life."

He laughs at that and I notice how deep and smooth the sound is. It makes me want to make him laugh some more.

"I promise it's not that difficult. I could teach you how to draw a stick figure in no time."

"Sounds fair. Just don't be disappointed if it ends up looking like a twig."

His chuckle sends a shiver through me. Damn it. This guy is yummy as hell and it's totally killing my plan to ditch the date halfway because so far I don't want to.

"I'd like to request an exchange in lessons, though."

"And that would be...?"

"Teaching me some legal jargon. For the longest time I thought alimony was the name of a dessert."

I choke on my glass of water, laughter sputtering out of me at how serious he looks. It takes a few seconds to get through my coughing fit before I can answer him. "Why on earth would you think that?"

"Why wouldn't I? It sounds like a combination of almond and lemony. You have to admit that sounds tasty as fuck."

"It does." I agree, pretending to think about it.

"Now that I've officially embarrassed myself to break the ice," He grins self-assuredly and I find myself smiling back. "I do believe it's only fair that you tell me something embarrassing about yourself."

I scoff. "I do something embarrassing at least three times a day. There are a number of things I can tell you."

He rubs his hands together mischievously. "Do tell."

Our conversation takes off from there and maintains its course, never once getting awkward or uncomfortable. Dylan is a great conversationist and he's able to shift from subject to subject breezily. The initial hour limit I'd internally set on this date passes by and by the time we're done with our food and drinks, it's been nearly two hours. I barely felt the time and I'm more than impressed with him by the end of our date.

"This was fun." He says almost shyly once the waiter takes our empty plates and retrieves the bill.

"It was." I agree honestly. "I was a little skeptical at first but I had a really good time. I thought for sure that it was too late for me to get back in the dating game after years of not being on one."

"I still find that hard to believe." He shakes his head and gestures a hand to me. "You are unbelievably witty and funny and also beautiful. It's hard to believe you haven't been snatched up yet."

I shrug and pick invisible lint off my khaki skinny jeans, not meeting his eyes. "I had a bad relationship. It's been a long time since I got out of it but...some scars never heal."

"Understood." His voice sounds so vulnerable I have no choice but to look back up out of curiosity. The sadness on his face floors me and I'm curious to ask what he's talking about but he beats me to it, volunteering the information before I have the chance. "My last girlfriend...she passed away three years ago."

My breath gets caught in my chest with a harsh gasp. Woah. I was not expecting that. He just seems so laidback and carefree that it's hard to imagine something that awful has happened to him.

"I'm so sorry." I tell him honestly. I place my hand above his on our table. My voice is a whisper, too taken back to muster anything more. "May I ask how?"

"Got caught in the wrong place at the wrong time." He looks somewhere over my shoulder, his eyes glazed over with anger and not really seeing anything. "She stopped by the bank after work and got caught in the middle of a robbery. One of the robbers was going to shoot a little girl to convince everyone to cooperate so she jumped in. The bullet hit her in the neck and she died instantly."

"Dylan." My throat closes up tightly. God, that's horrifying. At least with my situation I was able to turn it around for the better but with Dylan...there was no stopping what fate had already planned for them. "I can't even imagine...I'm so sorry. I hope she's in a better place."

"Me too." He squeezes my hand and some of that anger dispenses. "It was a tough road but I've come to terms with it all now. Besides, her sacrifice wasn't in vain. The mother of the little girl she saved still sends me letters and pictures of how her daughter is doing. She started middle school earlier this September. It's rewarding seeing the little girl thrive and knowing she wouldn't be able to do that if Jenna didn't step in. She's her hero and mine."

"Wow." I shake my head, utterly enthralled by his story. "I wish I could say something more monumental but I'm truly speechless. I really admire what you've done for yourself."

"Thanks." The tips of his ears go red. "If it's any consolation, this is the first date I've been on since losing her. I'm just as out of my element here."

"No pressure, huh?" I laugh nervously and wipe my palms on my jean-clad thighs. "How'd I do?"

"It was an amazing first date. I was nervous as hell and felt so damn guilty but you genuinely made me feel better so thank you."

"I'm so glad you had a good time." My own guilt suffocates me and I know there's no way I can lead him on, not after he was so brutally honest with me. "But...I should tell you something. I kind of have feelings for someone else at the moment and I can't see us going on a second date. This guy...he wasn't entirely in the picture when Lenny set this date. I mean he was but he also wasn't. It's confusing. I don't want to drag you in to this mess."

"Hey, don't worry about it." He says sincerely. "As great as this was it made me realize I'm not ready to date yet. I had a fantastic time and this was just the break I needed to get back into the game but I'm not ready for anything serious."

"So you're not mad?"

"Not at all. He's a lucky guy."

"I think Lenny knew we would end up being friends more than anything else." I smile wryly. "That girl is too smart for her own good."

"A little scary, though." He tugs his collar, looking entirely serious.

I burst out laughing and hold my thumb and index finger close together. "Just a little bit."

"Speaking of scary," Dylan clears his throat and tips his chin behind me. "That dude over there has been grilling me for the past ten minutes like he wants to rip my balls in half. He's headed here."

My brows come together in confusion and I twist in my seat. I don't have to look too hard to see who Dylan is talking about because the crowd parts to make room for the dominating presence that silently dares anyone to mess with him. My heart starts beating erratically when I recognize my best friend stalking his way to our table, his hands curled into fists beside him. He looks pissed with a capital P.

"Fuck." I mumble and turn back around. I regard Dylan with wide eyes. "The guy I was telling you about? That's him. He's definitely going to try and kill you so I apologize in advance."

Dylan doesn't back down. If anything, he leans back in his seat and watches the whole thing unfold in amusement.

"Who the fuck are you?" Asher demands when he reaches us and glares at Dylan like he can shoot lasers out of his eyes.

"Ash." I snap at the vehemence in his tone. Who the hell is he to talk to anyone like that? "Use your goddamn manners."

"Oh, I'm sorry." He snarks and narrows his eyes some more. "Who the fuck are you, please?"

Dylan crosses his arms, smirking a little. Most guys would have walked away with their dicks tucked between their legs but he holds his own and my admiration for him increases. "A friend."

"A friend." Asher repeats in clear disbelief. "So you're telling me this isn't a date?"

As soon as he asks the question, the waiter comes by with our bill and sets it down on the table. "For the happy couple! I'll be right back to collect it."

Oh, for Christ's sake. Can't he read the room?

I glare at his retreating figure and sigh deeply in defeat when Asher scowls so hard, I'm half convinced steam will blow out of his ears.

"I've got it." Dylan smiles at me, ignoring Asher. I raise my brows at how he's handling the situation. He's got balls.

"Let me pay for my half." I insist.

"Don't worry about it. It's my treat today and you can get it next time."

"There won't be a next time." Asher cuts in and I swing my stare in his direction, my hand twitching with the need to smack him. He's acting completely out of line. I watch him as he takes out his wallet, muttering something under his breath when he takes a peek at our bill, and throws enough cash on the table to cover our expenses. "I'm paying. You are not. This isn't a fucking date so you can forget it."

"Asher." I stand up and shove a finger in his chest. "Stop being such a dick. You have no right to treat Dylan this way when he hasn't done anything to you. This is fucking Dean Tory all over again."

I'm absolutely fuming but I force myself to calm down when I turn back to Dylan. I muster up a smile. "I am so sorry about this. I would hate for you to remember our time together this way. I really did have fun."

"Don't worry about it, Aria." He stands up as well and comes to my side of the booth to hug me. I look over his shoulder with wide eyes at Asher whose jaw is clenched so tight I think his teeth might break. When Dylan pulls back to kiss my cheek, I know he's silently telling Asher he could give a fuck about his tempter tantrum. Well, damn. "Life is too short not to fight for the ones you love. This guy may be an asshole but he gets that so I can't find it in me to dislike him. I hope things work out with you two."

He turns to Asher who overheard his little speech and now has his brows furrowed in confusion. He seems wary as Dylan holds out a hand for him.

"Don't let her get away. Make the most out of your time with her." He tells Ash solemnly. My throat tightens, knowing he's probably thinking about Jenna. Oh, Dylan.

"I don't plan to." Asher says in an equally serious tone that has my head snapping to him in surprise. And just what the hell does he mean by that?

The two shake hands in a bizarre version of a truce and Dylan waves to me before heading out. Both Asher and I watch his retreat silently.

"What was that?" He mutters when Dylan steps out of the bar.

His words spike my anger all over again. If he behaved like a decent human being he wouldn't be so confused right now. Instead, he marched right up to us, practically pissed a circle around me to mark his territory, and claimed he wouldn't let me get away to a total stranger when he's yet to tell me those words. Call me old-fashioned but I'm pretty sure you should talk about that kind of thing before announcing it to the whole freaking world.

"I'm done with this bullshit." I grab my coat, practically yanking it on, and grab my purse before walking away. I can hear Asher following me but I happily pretend like he isn't there. I have nothing to say to him right now.

I pull my coat tighter around me to protect myself against the cold winter air. My breath visibly puffs out of me into the night sky as I practically jog to where my car is parked in an attempt to ditch Asher.

"Ria!" He calls behind me.

Screw him. Screw him for always acting like he owns me when he's never once stepped up to actually claim me. It's his own damn fault he can't own up to his feelings or allow himself to be with me but also hates it when I choose to move on. So I can't be with him but I also can't be with anyone else? Bull. Fucking. Shit.

I unlock my car and sit in the driver's seat, slamming the car door shut. I put the keys in the ignition to start the car and turn on the heat, giving it a few minutes to warm up before I drive off. I stare straight ahead while Asher knocks violently on the window of the passenger side door.

"Aria, come on." His partly muffled voice insists. "I'm freezing my ass off, baby."

Baby? Is he for fucking real?

My eyes bug out as I turn to him in total disbelief. How in the hell can he be acting like we're a couple or some shit? We were barely even friends a month ago. Then I'd tried to kiss him and he ran away like a coward only to come back and pretend like nothing was wrong, casually sneaking into my room for sleepovers and some good old fashioned humping. I've had enough of his hot and cold behaviour. I don't have time to play games and try and decode what the hell he wants from me. He should have the balls to tell me himself and if he doesn't then that's his own damn problem.

Part of me recognizes I'm being kind of hypocritical since I spent the better part of my time in California avoiding Asher because of my growing feelings but that was different. I didn't give Asher false hope or constantly blur the lines between our friendship, confusing him and making him question what he wants. I'd chosen one straight answer: to remain friends or at least loosely acquainted. I at least gave him consistency which is something he clearly hasn't heard of before.

I unlock the door to let him inside because I'm not that much of a bitch to leave him stranded in the middle of winter.

"Thanks." He grumbles once he's seated and closes the door. He turns to me with an open mouth but I hold my hand up to stop him.

"Not a word." I demand. His mouth shuts, knowing I'm dead serious. "I'm driving us home and I don't want to hear anything from you. We can talk another time but not now. I've had enough, Asher. Not. A. Damn. Word."

His mouth turns down in disagreement but he complies, facing the front and sulking angrily. I put the car into drive and practically skid away from the parking lot. I don't even know why Asher is here right now or if he's leaving his own car behind but he stays where he is and watches the road as I whiz by. The entire drive is silent and full of controlled rage but I can feel the tension crackling in the air. We're both pissed off as hell and practically heaving, ready to unleash on each other. We're halfway to our houses when I can't take it anymore and abruptly stop the car, pulling over on the side of an empty road.

"What the hell is your problem?" I turn to him, my chest rising and falling with harsh breaths.

"I thought we weren't talking." He replies easily, still staring straight ahead.

"Don't be a smart-ass." I unbuckle my seat belt so I can completely turn in my seat to face him. "Exactly what are you trying to get at with me? You're supposed to be my friend and you're doing a shit job at it. You'd think sixteen years of friendship would mean something to you enough to not ruin us."

"Ruin us?" He repeats incredulously and barks out a laugh. He finally meets my gaze with heated eyes. "How the fuck do you figure that?"

"You tell me." I throw my hands up in exasperation. "Avoiding me and then acting like everything is okay, sabotaging my dates, getting physical. Take your pick, Ash."

His eyes narrow and those transparent baby blues darken considerably. "I'm not the one who started the avoiding game. You decided to pretend like I fell off the face of the earth for the past two years and made me feel like I was losing my goddamn mind when my best friend was there one day and gone the next."

I blink at his livid tone and try to deny his accusations but he's not done just yet.

"As for the date you went on? Tell me something. If you caught me in the middle of a date, especially after that day in your room, would you walk up to us and congratulate our relationship or would you feel maybe even a prickle of jealousy?"

The idea of Asher on a date with someone else...it tightens my chest painfully. But still...

"It doesn't change the fact that you could have handled the situation better."

"I went too far as usual, fine. But I had every right to feel the way I did."

"And you felt jealous?" I question a little skeptically. My heart rate picks up. "Because...we got physical?"

"Oh my fuck." He runs his hands through his hair and tugs furiously. "What do you think, Aria? That I have a hard-on for you and that's all? Really?"

"Don't you dare." I point an accusing finger at him. "I'm not a fucking mind reader. If you have something to say then say it. I can't keep up with your on and off behaviour and you can't expect me to magically make sense of it. We're adults, not children in high school. You need to start acting like it."

"As if you were behaving so maturely when you were avoiding me for reasons I still don't know yet. As if you weren't making me play guessing games for two damn years."

"But I wasn't making you believe two different truths! I don't know what you want from me, Asher!"

My frustration gets the better of me and all I can think is that I need some fucking space. I get out of the car and savour the feeling of the cool air on my heated face. I feel like I'm on fire from the anger I'm feeling.

I hear Asher get out of the car and growl low in my throat. Can't he leave me alone for just one minute?

"Go back inside." I say without turning around. I lean my back on my car, closing my eyes and forcing myself to control my erratic breathing. This is too much. Too much.

"It's cold." I hear his voice and know he's close. Probably right in front of me.

"No shit."

"Now who's being a smart-ass? Get in the car, Aria."

"I don't take orders from you, Asher."

I hear his grunt of frustration and don't even flinch when I feel his palms slam on the car on either side of me, the car vibrating for a second from the force of his actions. No matter how angry he gets I know he would never hurt me. I feel undeniably safe with him.

Warm breath fans over my face and I can feel the heat radiating off his body too. I don't even have to open my eyes to know he's so, so close. Inches away, if that.

"You're so fucking annoying." He mutters but he doesn't sound very mad anymore.

"Right, as if you're an absolute peach." I snort.

A small gust of his breath flutters over my nose and my lips from his silent laughter. My body tingles with awareness of his proximity. He's not touching me in any way but I still feel him everywhere. My pulse picks up in my chest and in between my legs. I squeeze my eyes shut even tighter because I know if I open them, I'll lose my last shred of self-control.

He's your best friend, I remind myself. The boy you grew up with. Nothing more. You're still the same Aria and Asher.

"You smell like peaches, did you know that?" He whispers. I feel his nose brush my neck, slowly trailing upwards, and bite my lip to hold back my whimper.

"We're friends, Ash." I almost beg. I know things are changing between us as we speak and it's so terrifying I feel like I'm suffocating. I hate change. He hates change. Why is he doing this? "My brother is your brother, too. My sisters are like your sisters. I'm..."

"Not my sister. Not my fucking friend." He says the word like it's full of venom. He nips my jaw lightly and my mouth parts just barely in pleasure. His lips tickle my cheek as they glide their way across to the corner of my mouth. Our lips aren't even touching yet and I'm already melting in his hands, my heart losing the will to stay inside my chest and not jump into his.

You'll break me. If you leave me too, I'll shatter.

"What are you saying?" If it wasn't for the pin-drop silent night, there's no way he would have heard my barely audible worlds.

"I'm saying that I'm done pretending." His lips trail back down to my neck and he kisses me there gently. Small and feather-light pecks that are driving me out of my mind with lust. He feels so good, so right. "Done pretending like we were meant to be just friends. Done pretending like there isn't something between us. Done pretending like you don't want me as badly as I want you because I want you, Princess. Not as my fucking friend. As so much fucking more."

My eyes flash open and I finally meet his stare head-on. We look at each other and there's so much between us. Too much to deny what's happening or that things are different now. One thing is unfailingly clear: there's no going back anymore.

His hands grip my waist as he presses our bodies together, flattening me against my car. My hands find his shoulders and I grip them tightly to hold myself up, my knees turning like jello and giving up on me.

"What...what now?" I'm staring right as his lips, lips that I want on my own so bad that I can't think about anything else.

"Wait for me." He pleads gruffly. My eyes snap up to his and the vulnerability in them floors me. "I need to take care of something, something that could ruin everything, and until that's out of the way, wait for me. Don't go on dates. Don't let anyone else touch you. Say you're mine and you will be. I promise you will be if you just wait."

"What do you have to take care of?" Although I'm asking, I already know the answer. Only one thing can put that kind of fear in his eyes. It's the same thing that ruined his life eight years ago. Oh, Ash. What have you done?

"Say you're mine." He ignores me and presses our foreheads together. My eyes flutter shut as our noses brush. His breath is warmth and comfort against the cool night when he whispers, "Please."

I can't fight this anymore, can I?

And so I do the one thing I've been running from since I met the boy next door sixteen years ago and fell in love with him. I give him my heart, knowing I won't ever get it back.

"I'm yours, Ashes."

___________________________

A/N

*SCREAMS*

I just...I can't! I know you guys hate me for not giving you a kiss in this chapter but this chapter was about their love, not their lust. I feel their love everywhere when I read about them and I'm so giddy for them. Things are finally picking up!

Please VOTE, comment and share if you liked this chapter!

Happy Reading :)