Do you remember when I said I was going to forget that anything ever happened between us? I meant it. Did I say that it would be easy? No. Am I currently walking to work on my day off to distract myself? Yes.

I walk out of the store and in the direction of the flower shop, toying with the little pin of a black cat in my hand before placing it back into the brown paper bag.

I decided to take a detour and pick up something for Melissa from the store. I went in there with no idea of what I could get her but while I was walking down the aisles, trailing my fingertips against the shelves, I remembered something that happened a couple of weeks ago at work.

"Favourite food?" I ask Melissa. We're waiting for a customer to come in but, by the looks of the weather outside, it doesn't seem likely that someone's going to want to go outside and buy flowers. There's more rain falling right now than I've seen since I came here.

She twirls a pink tulip in her hand, humming as she thinks. "It has to be pumpkin pie."

"I've never tried that."

"You haven't?" She gasps in shock. "Remind me when Thanksgiving comes around to bake you one."

I nod. I'm sure if it's made by her it's bound to be nice. "How about your favourite colour?"

She answers almost instantly. "Easy, gold."

"And your favourite band?"

"The Rolling Stones." She starts bobbing her head slightly as if she were listening to their music right now.

"An English rock band? I didn't pin you as the type to be into rock music."

She laughs lightly. "What can I say? I'm full of surprises."

I'd only ever listened to The Rolling Stones a couple of times when my dad would blast their music in the kitchen. He always liked to listen to something when he was cooking, he said it helped him focus. I'm not sure how that made sense, but he was right, his food was always better with the music.

"And you?" She questions.

"Let me think," I tap my fingers on the wooden counter, staring out of the shop window. Something sitting in front of the door catches my attention and distracts me from the question. It's definitely not a person, it's too small. I squint my eyes slightly. "Cat!"

I rush over to where it's sitting patiently. "Your favourite band's a cat?"

I open the door and it walks straight in, rubbing itself against my leg. "No, I mean there's a cat." I step out of the way so Melissa can see it and her eyes light up.

"Oh my god, what are you doing here, kitty?" She holds her hand out for it to sniff and then runs it through its black fur lovingly.

Of course, the cat doesn't answer her. If it did, I would be very concerned. She cradles it in her arms and takes it through to the back before putting some water in a spare bowl. She places the bowl down and the cat starts drinking from it.

"Let me guess, you're a cat person?"

She doesn't take her eyes away from the bundle of fur. "Surprise."

The cat stayed with us for a while. We never found out its name so we both just called it kitty. It had a collar with an address engraved into it but no name. When the rain stopped, we let it go outside. Melissa told me later that day that she had a black cat when she was younger that looked exactly like that one. She said she'd always wanted to get another one but never had the time. Obviously, I couldn't get her a cat so a pin of one is the next best thing. It'll go with the assortment of other ones she has.

It takes me longer than usual to get to work but when I do finally get there, I open the door, the bell ringing above my head. Melissa pops her head out from the back. "Madison," she beams. "What are you doing here on your day off?"

"I needed to take my mind off things, plus, I wanted to come to see you."

She places her hand over her heart, grinning from ear to ear. "I feel loved."

I can't help but giggle at her soppy tone. "Do you mind if I work today?"

She beckons me over to her. I follow her behind the counter as she wraps her hair up into a bun. "Of course not, you're welcome here whenever." I give her a grateful smile. "What are you trying to take your mind off? Do you want to talk about it?"

I grab my apron from one of the hooks and tie it around my waist. "Not really," I answer honestly. The last thing I want to do is be reminded of what happened last night. I need to keep myself busy. "Oh, I almost forgot. I got you something." I take the brown paper bag out of my pocket and thrust it into her hands.

Her eyes widen. "Is it my birthday already?" Her eyes bounce around the room as she tries to work out the answer to her question.

"I don't think so." I stifle a laugh.

She takes it out of the bag and her eyes light up. "Is this to put on my apron?" She sings with excitement.

"That was the idea." I offer to put it on for her and she lets me. "You look stylish. Not that you didn't before, you always look great."

She chuckles softly. "Thank you, thank you. But, what's with the gift?"

I take a seat on the stool, resting my palms on my jeans. "I never told you how grateful I was that you offered me a job here."

She pulls me into a hug, and I rest my head on her shoulder. She runs her fingers through my hair like a mother would do to her child. I start to tear up involuntarily. Do you know when you need something, but you didn't know you needed it until it happens? This is one of those moments. I needed this hug.

I allow myself to relax. The smell of flowers and coffee wraps around me. I sigh deeply, allowing myself to fall further and further into her arms.

"Oh, honey, offering you a job was the best thing I ever did." She says softly.

I wipe my eyes with the sleeve of my top and pull away. "I should probably do my job now." I laugh, grabbing some flowers that need to be arranged into a bouquet.

"Probably." She agrees.

*

The rest of the day passes quickly, and my dread grows. When it's time to go home, I try to convince myself that I can simply go into my room and stay out of his way. He might not even be there anyway. Who knows where he'll be? Probably with some girl getting back at me for Levi kissing me. My heart aches but I ignore it.

"Bye, Melissa. Have a good night." I call back to her.

"Bye!"

I step out into the cold and wrap my jacket tighter around me. At this moment, I'm thankful for the cold. If I'm focusing on how cold I am I won't be focusing on him, right? I set off back to the house and listen to my footsteps as my shoes contact the concrete.

"I'm lucky to be here," I say to no one. "I've always dreamed of coming here, I should be happy." I laugh to myself. Have I fallen that deep that I've resorted to talking to myself? Yes. Yes, I have.

America was a place that my mum always spoke of. She said that she would love to take me here one day, but we weren't in the position to do that at the time. So, instead, we'd make scrapbooks with cut-outs of all the things we wanted to go see. There was the empire state building, the golden gate bridge, and the statue of liberty. These were only a few that filled up the pages.

My mum had already been to see most of these landmarks. She said she didn't feel the magic when she went to see them alone so she knew she would have to take me with her to see them again. She tried to copy the accents that she heard in the cities she went to. My dad told me that I would laugh so much I would have a tummy ache by the end of it.

I smile at the thought of her. I'm here, mum. I'm in America. I haven't seen the landmarks we wanted to go see yet but I'm here.

I pass a dark alleyway and find myself stopping at the end of it. Peering into the darkness, I remember how Archer first kissed me after the party. I thought he was drunk, but he told me that the fight had sobered him up. I remember the butterflies I felt the day...the butterflies I still feel around him.

A low grunt travels down the alley and towards me. At first, I think I'm hearing things, but it happens again seconds later. Is that from an animal or a person? The next thing I hear is a strangled sob. It's definitely from a person.

My feet drag me down the alley, past the dumpsters, and towards whoever's making that noise. If someone's hurt, I should help them, right? I know in movies you scream at the character to ignore it and they never do. It always results in something terrible. But this isn't a movie. I can protect myself.

I get closer and notice a figure hunched over in the corner, sitting against the cold brick wall of the building. "Excuse me, are you okay?" I ask wearily.

They look up. Once my eyes have fully adjusted and their face comes into view, I furrow my eyebrows. It's him from the party yesterday. What was his name? Tyler introduced me to him. I'm sure it was something like James. Jackson, maybe. I wrack my brain for his name until it comes to me.

"Jordan?"