Chapter Five (Alek)

"And then at the very end, the bad guy appeared! It was so scary!" Harmony exclaimed enthusiastically, waving her arms around as she sat on the edge of my bed, recounting the movie she'd seen earlier with the pups. I forced the best smile I could for her, and I hated myself for not trying hard.

My whole body hurt. No, hurt would be the biggest understatement of the year. I was in complete agony and the healing process just made it worse because of how quick and harsh it was. Worse still, it wasn't fast enough. It was slow by were standards, agonizingly so. It didn't help that I was forced to be bedridden with mostly Thalia for company, who came in to inform me of all the things I wasn't doing. She didn't say it like that, but I could hear it in her voice. I could hear the raw anger and contempt she had for me since she caught me with Kylan, and more pain lacerated my heart at the very thought.

Kylan.

I felt like a heroine addict. I tried to stop. I tried so hard, but I couldn't quit him. I couldn't quit thinking of him, perking up with pathetic hope that he was the one coming into my room to visit me, to bring me my meals, only to have Thalia burst in with a whole new set of rants that involved me at the root of it. And worst of all was that she never said it. She hinted around it, like she thought I was too stupid to realize it.

"Daddy, do you need more pills?" Harmony asked me, blue eyes blinking up at me in concern. I swallowed at the painful lump in my throat, giving her another plastic smile that felt like it was wearing thin.

"That'd be great." I told her. She smiled in relief, grateful to be of help as she hopped off the bed and went to the bottle of pills sitting on the nightstand. I grabbed a glass of water and took the pills from her before swallowing them down. Harmony smiled still before I forced another smile back.

"I think I'm gonna go back to sleep, kiddo. Daddy's tired." I added. Harmony nodded in complete understanding and hopped on the bed with grace, leaning over to kiss me on the cheek.

"I'm gonna go take care of Ty! Cuz that's what big sisters do! Love you, daddy. Get lots of sleep so you can get better and we can go to The Mockingbird!" She exclaimed, giving her head a cute little tilt before she slid off the bed and went to the door opening it up just as someone was reaching for the handle. I looked up with hope, only to see Zaid standing there. Instantly my hope fled and my heart sank into my stomach. Zaid gave Harmony a smile and shooed her off before he stepped inside. I started to sit up, despite the pain coursing through me.

"It's all right," He told me gently, making me swallow hard and slump back against the pillows propping me up, "Relax. I'm not here to get on your case... about the chores anyway." I held my breath. Of course he'd find out about yet another fling. He was probably here to boot me out.

These people opened your arms to you and this is how you repay them?

Cheating on one of the original members with her own brother?

"I'm..." I couldn't find the words to apologize. I knew this was going to happen. I knew it.

"Alek, relax," Zaid said again with calm sincerity and authority, "I'm not here to hurt you. I want to talk about Kylan." Could my stomach drop any further? I said nothing, though, as Zaid walked over to the bed and sat down, looking around the room for a moment. I swallowed hard, before he turned to pin me with an intense stare.

"You and Kylan are mates." He stated. I gave him a long hard stare, but tried not to get pissed at the obvious statement.

"Yes." I replied.

"But you're married to Thalia. You guys had a population problem for a while there."

"Yes." I said. Zaid nodded slowly at that, looking away. I pursed my lips for a moment before taking a deep breath.

"I'm really sorry about what happened," I said, making Zaid frown, "Kylan and I aren't seeing each other anymore. Thalia knows. I swear it won't happen again. And to be honest, I really don't want to talk about Kylan right now. It'll make things easier." Zaid stared at me intently.

"Alek, did it ever cross your mind that maybe it's making things harder?"

"Thalia's my wife."

"And Kylan's your mate," Zaid said at last, making me frown, "Mates aren't just people you fall in love with. They're almost literally your other half. Without Kylan, you're just going to get weaker and feel even worse. You should've been healed by now at full power, but you're not. You're healing slowly and painfully. And Kylan's suffering too. Look, I'm just saying that we should talk to Scythe and Storm. Maybe we can work something out." I clenched my teeth, wishing I could just tell him to fuck off and leave me alone, but this was the alpha talking and I was an omega. Spitting in his face would just make him angry and while Zaid wasn't likely to tear me to pieces, Scythe would be.

"No," I said after a while, making Zaid scowl in confusion, "You don't understand. I can't just leave Thalia. We have children together. And I have a duty to this pack. Look, if I really wanted to do something about it, don't you think I would have done it by now?"

"Alek--"

"Please," I said in frustration, "I just want to go back to sleep. There's no point in talking about it anymore than this. Nothing can change it... and the last thing I want is for my children to look at me like I'm some kind monster." Zaid stood up, frowning at me.

"So you'd rather they look at you with pity? Because their father can't be with the one he loves?" He asked, making me bite my tongue. I said nothing and Zaid gave up, turning around and leaving the room. I watched him go before slumping back against the bed, taking deep breathes to calm my broiling temper and the pain pulsing hot through my veins. And yet, no matter how much I rolled around and tried to get comfortable, it wasn't possible. I was in pain either way and Zaid's words felt like stakes driven through my chest.

Storm would never approve of dissolving my relationship with Thalia. My whole purpose of being accepted was to produce pups with Thalia. If he found out I'd been cheating on her with Kylan, I'd be screwed. They'd kill me or worse, kick me out and I'd be considered a lone wolf and that was incredibly dangerous.

A knock on my door made me groan in distress. I started to snarl at them when I realized it was a stranger walking into my room. He was petite with dark red hair cut to his nape, cute framing bangs over deep hazel eyes. He was on the feminine side. He wore a blue and black fleece button up and blue jeans that looked like maybe Cal had loaned it to him.

"Who are you?" I asked warily, eyeing the tray in his hands. He frowned.

"Ladarius. I thought I smelled something strange in this house." He said. The wolf inside me growled at the insult. What was that supposed to mean? However, I reined that half of me in to avoid him going to Zaid or Scythe because I dared to growl at someone, even another omega. The moment he entered, his soft demeanor indicated he was omega. But who was he and why was he here?

"We're staying for the night," Ladarius said as if answering my thoughts, then cocked his head to stare at me with eyes that didn't quite tell me what he was thinking, "Your alpha Scythe allowed it." He didn't elaborate on that, and I just stared at him and he stared back. There was something strange about this omega, something... I dunno, familiar? I tried to reach back into my memories to pull something up, but I couldn't find anything.

And the more he stared at me in silence, the more uneasy I got.

"Why are you here?" I asked at last, uncomfortable both with his presence and the pain throbbing in my side. Ladarius blinked, then frowned curiously.

"I picked your scent out amongst the rest of the wolves here. You're different from them." He replied, making me arch a brow at that, feeling mildly irritated.

"Are you trying to tell me that you were drawn to me because I was just another omega?" I asked. Ladarius blushed at that, making my shoulders relax just a bit in relief to see that he wasn't totally emotionally constipated.

"N-No," He protested, then hesitated again, glancing around as if waiting for someone to jump out at him before he cleared his throat and looked at me almost shyly now, "I just... No, it was a different scent. I don't know. It reminded me of someone I knew. Maybe I'm wrong." I frowned at that. A scent that made him curious enough to barge into a private room? I knew for a fact that Scythe would probably cut this guy's throat for walking into a room he wasn't permitted to enter. Guests weren't allowed to enter any of the bedrooms, except their own.

"Hey..." I started, but there was a slight knock on the door. Ladarius paled and backed up, turning around to open the door to reveal a very large, very intimidating alpha. Even the wolf in me backed down at the sheer size of this guy. Damp black hair swept back from a ruggedly handsome face, and eyes so black, they appeared soulless.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" He demanded of Ladarius, who winced at the cruel tone of voice in his alpha.

"Sorry. I swore I smelled something--"

"Get out," The alpha snarled and Ladarius squeaked, taking off out the door, then the alpha glanced at me in the room, giving me a short, curt nod, "Sorry for his rudeness. He was dropped on his head as a pup." Without another word, he shut the door and I sat there on the bed, confused.

What just happened?

Who were those wolves?

I frowned, shaking my head and wondering if maybe I had just imagined that whole scene. I reached across to the nightstand to grab my bottle of pills, grimacing in pain at having to twist for them. I glanced at the side-effects, but nothing that would lead to hallucinations was listed, just extreme drowsiness... and apparently not giving a fuck because I was too tired to be alarmed by the wolves that may or may not have just entered my room against house rules.

Not caring that I'd already taken my pills when Harmony had visited not more than an hour ago, I popped another couple into my mouth, swallowing a glass of water and closing my eyes to slump against the pillows, fighting the pain that lacerated my entire torso. Even with the pills, there was incredible discomfort and I could only choose two positions, both of which were still uncomfortable.

No, what I wanted to do was just roll over and hug something.

Preferably Kylan.

Aaand there we go again.

My heart bled and I pulled one of the spare pillows around to hug it as tightly as I could without causing myself extreme agony, but it didn't matter because nothing compared to my feelings for Kylan, an impossibility. It wasn't fair. I kept repeating the same mantra over and over again since Thalia and I had gotten married, and I'd realized Kylan was the one who was supposed to be my mate.

Since then, I'd seen everyone else get together with their mate. Scythe and Zaid, despite our pack differences, Aidan and Raven, Cal and Rylan, amongst several more. I'd even seen the rotten snow leopard end up with his mate, a member of a completely different species, and no one batted a lash.

Now I was forced to marry my mate's sister, and watch Kylan and I slowly crumble.

Part of me wanted to find Storm and beg to have my marriage to Thalia dissolved, but I knew he'd be furious. Besides, I had no right to ask that of him. I wasn't a member of their pack, not really, no matter what they put on their listing and the town census. I was the outsider they took pity on, nothing more.

Closing my eyes, I tried to drift off to sleep, only to have enough nightmares to keep me jumping in bed every few hours and causing myself more pain. Thalia hadn't come back to give me my dinner, nor had she brought anything into the room for me to entertain myself while I lay bed ridden, and even worse, I hadn't bathed yet and Thalia was the one who was supposed to come in here and do that. I hadn't seen her all day, but I couldn't bring myself to get angry with her.

She was probably tending to Ty and our son needed her more than I did.

So I endured it.

It was nearing eight in the evening, the room dark because I couldn't get up enough strength to turn the bedside lamp on, when someone knocked lightly on the door. I held my breath, watching the door crack open, and the rich scent of Kylan wafted into the room, causing my body to instantly react. I swallowed at my dry throat, then hissed when Kylan flicked the switch on and I shielded my eyes for a moment before blinking as Kylan came in with a scowl.

"Why are you sitting in the dark?" He asked. I wasn't going to tell him no one had come in to check on me since this morning. He'd instantly jump on Thalia over it and I didn't want anymore arguing, if not for my sake, then at least for the pups.

"It hurts my eyes," I lied and Kylan looked a little sheepish at having turned the lights on right away, "It's all right. Just turn them off and turn the lamp on. It's not as bright." Kylan nodded and switched the lamp on, then turned the overhead lights off before he came over to frown at me.

"You're looking a little pale. Did you take your medication?" He asked. My eyes darted to the empty glass of water by the bed and back to Kylan, hoping he hadn't noticed the eye flicker, but ever the observant beta, he did and he scowled.

"When was the last time someone came up here to give you water? Have you even had dinner yet? What about your bath? You were supposed to have your bandages changed." He added, his voice raising in anger. I grimaced.

"Please don't yell. I don't feel all that great. I don't want dinner." I responded. Kylan narrowed his eyes suspiciously on me. Uncomfortable with his accusing stare, I cleared my throat and shifted a little, cringing inwardly at the pain rushing through my system.

"Also, I wanted to ask... Do we have extra wolves or am I just hallucinating?" I asked. Kylan blinked, then frowned.

"Yeah," He said slowly, "Oddly enough, an alpha and an omega. They need a place to stay tonight and Scythe gave them permission to stay here. But how did you know?" I started to shrug, but pain tore up to my shoulder and I clenched my teeth, making Kylan take a step toward me, but I gave my head a quick shake to assure him I was all right.

"I smelled them." Was all I said, so as not to alarm Kylan. He'd probably flip if he found out they'd entered my room without permission and I didn't want him to be any angrier than he was. Even now, as he stood there with a relatively calm look on his face, I could feel the heat of his anger warming the room up. I wasn't entirely sure why he was angry right now, maybe because someone hadn't come to attend to me yet or because of the situation with Thalia. Probably just a demented mixture of both. And I didn't want to antagonize him anymore than he already was, so I just gave him a forced smile.

"Could you do me a favor and grab me something to read? I'm kind of bored." I added. Kylan frowned and instantly my stomach tightened. What did I do this time? Should I not have asked? I tried to read his expression beyond that deep frown, but I saw nothing. Even his eyes seemed to have shut down on me.

"Sure." He said at last, then moved past me to grab the glass before he left the room. I watched him go, uneasy about his reaction, before I closed my eyes and settled back against the pillows.

It's probably for the best that he tries to act stand-offish. It'd make trying to ignore our relationship a lot easier. Or so I thought. The more I laid there, trying to talk myself into being okay with everything, it just made me feel worse and worse. I swallowed against the lump in my throat and pulled up the hem of my shirt so I could study the bandages that were spotted with blood from my wounds.

I sighed, biting my bottom lip and peeling the bandage back to study the damage. It was just blood from earlier, thankfully, so it was mostly dried now around the stitches I'd been given. It needed to be cleaned up, though. I was tempted to ask Kylan to at least take me to the bathroom, but I didn't want to make him angry again, so I looked around and found some paper towels sitting on one of the tray's Harmony had brought in with her this morning. And thankfully, a bottle of alcohol.

It was gonna burn like a bitch, but it'll do.

I dabbed the paper towels with alcohol and very gently wiped the blood away, hissing through clenched teeth as the alcohol instantly burned the open cuts around my stitches. I pursed my lips and wiped carefully around them before I couldn't take it anymore and just laid everything aside, breathing steadily as the alcohol felt like it was tearing a brand new hole through me.

Thankfully, Kylan arrived with a glass of water, but nothing to entertain myself with. I pretended not to notice that, though, as he handed me the water and my bottle of pills. I took a couple more and set them aside.

"Let's clean your stitches." Kylan said suddenly, making me look up at him.

"You don't have to." I said quietly. Kylan pinned me with a stare that actually scared me.

"Yes, I do," He replied in a hard voice, pushing the blankets away from me and very gently putting his arms under me so he could lift me off the bed, "If Thalia isn't gonna do her damn job, then someone has to." I swallowed against the pain in my side and rested my head against Kylan's hard chest.

"She's probably busy taking care of Ty or something, Kylan. Really. It's all right." I assured, but a tic was forming in Kylan's jaw, which meant he was getting angrier the more I spoke, so I kept silent as he carried me into the bathroom and set me on the toilet seat while he filled the tub with a bit of water, but enough to actually soak my stitches. He turned back to me and pulled my shirt off over my head very carefully. I hesitated, dropping my eyes to avoid his as I sat there shirtless while he slowly got on his knees in front of me to strip my socks off and pull my pants off my waist.

The entire time, he said nothing. He was silent and mechanical as he helped me into the tub, leaving me sitting there in my underwear. Thankfully, he did most of the work, so I didn't have to twist or move unnecessarily as he worked gently.

Unfortunately, it was that gentle touch that set me on fire. I struggled to maintain my composure as I felt Kylan's hand press firmly, but gently around my bicep to hold my arm up while he wiped clean fresh water and antibacterial soap against the stitches. The pills were making it difficult to focus on anything, but his touch and the fact that I was sitting there in my underwear, which was soaked from the water.

Even worse, the control I had over my body was waning and my cock was steadily hardening the longer Kylan held me while he cleaned. It was horribly uncomfortable, and embarrassing. This entire time, I'd been trying to keep him at a distance, and here I was, getting hard just with a little innocent touching.

"She can't have you." Kylan said suddenly, making me blink and turn my to look at him to see him staring intently at my stitches. I frowned.

"Kylan--"

"She can't," Kylan repeated, somehow managing to wipe my skin gently, despite the determined anger in his voice, "I'm tired of being treated as if our feelings don't matter, as if our lives don't matter, just because we should put the pack first. The pack is fine now. We enough pups to fuel another generation of wolves."

"Kylan, I can't--"

"Stop," Kylan snapped, making me stiffen as he lifted his eyes to meet mine, "Stop letting them step all over you, Alek. I'm not stupid. I'm right here. I can tell what you're thinking and what you're feeling. You want me just as much as I want you. I'm going to talk to Storm and I'm going to make him understand that what we have isn't just a thrill-seeking relationship, but an honest to Goddess mating." I didn't say anything, just stared at him, baffled by his sudden speech. Something about his tone of voice, and his expression, told me that he wasn't just saying things again.

This time, he was serious, which made me swallow hard against the lump in my throat. The wolf in me was thrilled that Kylan was willing to fight for me, but the human in me was horrified that he was going to bother.

Our pack had suffered enough drama already and didn't need Kylan working them up over something so insignificant.

I started to argue, but Kylan cupped the back of my head and drew me in for a deep kiss that stole my breath away. I gasped quietly, eyelids fluttering as his tongue took control of my mouth and managed to soothe away some of the pain pulsing hot through my torso. A moan slipped past my lips against his and Kylan moaned back, stroking his fingers through my hair as he kissed me before we broke apart and he laid his forehead against mine.

"You're my mate, Alek. I'm willing to do anything to make sure we're together." He murmured. I clenched my teeth.

"Kylan, I don't want to hurt my kids." I managed. Kylan studied me intently.

"Alek, by pretending to love their mother and letting her treat you like this, you are not only hurting them, but yourself and Thalia. You can't keep clinging to this and calling it normal. For cryin' out loud, Alek, we're humans that turn into wolves on a daily basis." He tacked on with a laugh. I laughed helplessly against him. Kylan smiled at that, leaning in to nuzzle my cheek.

Maybe he was right. I didn't want to admit it openly, though. What if something went wrong? Something always went wrong. Even though every fiber of my being wanted to believe Kylan, that this could go our way, there was a sliver inside me that told me things were about to get worse.

But that was later.

This was now.

I leaned against Kylan as he put his arms around me gently, resting his cheek against my head and stroking his hand through my hair comfortingly. I savored the warmth of him. I wasn't sure if it was my medication that suddenly made me docile or the fact that Kylan cared so much about our relationship that he was willing to put his position as a beta on the line. Or maybe both. Either way, I let him comfort me before he pulled me out of the tub gently and dressed me in a t-shirt and sweats. He carried me back to the bed where he helped settle me in.

"Oh," Kylan said after I was finished taking my pills, "I didn't grab you a book earlier because I don't want anything to take your attention away from me. Call me selfish." He gave me a dorky grin and I smiled back as he plopped on the bed and reached out to take my hand in his. I stared at the way he laced our fingers together, his own eyes admiring the sight of our hands like this. I looked up at him and he stared back at me intently, drawing in ever so closely to let our lips meet.

But they never had the chance because the door opened and Thalia came in. I gasped and instantly tried to yank my hand from Kylan, who held me fast and shot Thalia a deadly glare, which she returned tenfold.

"You bastard," Thalia hissed, slamming the door shut behind her to give us privacy from anyone who might be eavesdropping, "I told you to stay away from my husband! You ever hear the term homewrecker?" Kylan curled his lip and growled animalistically in his throat, making me grimace.

"You ever heard of stealing, Thalia? I've told you once and I'll tell you for the rest of the eternity," He warned in a low threatening voice as he rose to his feet, finally releasing my hand so he could face Thalia, "Alek is my mate, not yours." Thalia raked Kylan with a disgusted sneer.

"Well, then it sucks to be you, because he was my husband first."

"I don't think that's how it works. I'm going to talk to Storm tonight and I'm going to dissolve your marriage if it's the last thing I do." Kylan snapped. Thalia's eyes snapped fire at him before they locked on me and I stiffened.

"How could you do this to me? Again! I told you to keep your paws off him! What will our children think?" She demanded, voice rising to a shriek. I winced and opened my mouth, but Kylan was right there to defend me.

"Get off his ass, Thalia," Kylan growled menacingly, "It's your fault he's always feeling like shit and it's your fault he doesn't get the attention and love he deserves. He's not your bitch. Not anymore." I shot Kylan a short glare at his choice of words, but I didn't get the chance to even put a word in, because the door opened again, this time to admit Scythe, who looked like someone had just pissed in his Cheerios.

"That's enough," He warned, "Thalia, Kylan, out. Alek, get some rest." I sighed in relief that he'd come in here before it'd gotten ugly. While wolves valued their females, they wouldn't hesitate to rip their throats open if it came right down to it and Kylan actually looked serious about getting into a full on fight with his sister, which instantly made my stomach drop.

The only reason they were fighting was because of me.

My earlier peace dissolved and I found myself feeling so incredibly depressed, that all I could do was lay there as Thalia raked me with one last sneer before storming out of the room. Kylan started to leave, then doubled back and gave me a firm, open kiss on the forehead before he marched out of the room past Scythe, whose eyes followed Kylan with a look of irritation. Scythe glanced back at me, gave me a nod, then departed from the room, closing the door behind him.

And then I was left in eerie silence, at least, for a while there until I heard Kylan, Thalia, and Scythe all arguing in the next room. Though their voices were muffled, I could still hear the anger and practically feel it seeping in through the walls. Guilt dropped on my shoulders like a huge weight as I slumped against the pillows.

Crap, I did it again. Right when I thought I could let go, I'd caved into Kylan again, and we were caught by Thalia, again.

At this rate, things were going to keep repeating, I knew they would.

Kylan was too determined to make this work and Thalia was determined to destroy it, and I knew neither of them would give up until they ended up really hurting each other. They were siblings for goddess's sake, and I was caught in the middle of it. If anything, I was ruining their relationship.

A cold thought occurred to me as I sat there on the bed, staring at the closed door, listening to the muffled voices rising with anger. It was a thought that felt like a block of ice sitting in my stomach. I had considered this option for a while, each time Kylan and I had gotten together and every time Thalia spat in my face for something stupid I'd done. But the only thing that had held me back was the shining faces of my children. What I was planning could truly hurt them and that was the last thing I wanted, but by staying, I was just making things worse.

Kylan was right. I was hurting them by faking this relationship with Thalia, and hurting them by sneaking around behind their mother's back with Kylan. I was hurting Thalia by doing all of this, and she didn't deserve that. The only reason she was so angry with me all the time was for the mere fact that she hadn't met her mate and it was making her weaker, more tired. Sooner or later, I was going to turn into Thalia, if not already. I was already tired of everything, already so weak that it was taking me far too long to heal from a bear attack.

This wasn't going to work.

None of this was going to work.

I bit into my bottom lip, squeezing my eyes shut and clenching my fists. Tears threatened to spill down my face, but I swallowed against them again, taking deep breathes as I tried to convince myself that this was the best way to solve their problems. It was going to hurt Kylan for sure, and my children, and I hated myself for it, but I was tired of being so selfish. Tired of leading Kylan on, tired of faking for Thalia and my children, tired of making their lives harder.

I had to do something for them.

I took a deep breath and pushed the blankets back, struggling to get to my feet. Pain rocketed through my entire being and I hissed through clenched teeth. I ignored it as I pushed myself up and stumbled, almost slamming into the nightstand, but I managed to catch my balance on it as I struggled over to the window. I managed to catch the latch and unlock it, throwing the panes open to let in the cool night air outside. I took a deep breath, relieved by it as I leaned on the sill on both hands, more pain pulsing through my system.

I looked down over three stories, staring at the ground below. It wasn't a huge fall, and for all I knew, it wouldn't kill me, but it'd open my stitches long enough for me to bleed out... maybe. I had no idea if it would work, but I had to try it. I took another deep breath, closing my eyes and reaching one hand up to catch the side of the window, trying to pull myself out.

Come on!

I clenched my teeth, trying to urge myself to just throw myself out and get it over with, but something was holding me back. I had no idea what it was until the door behind me opened again and I cursed, only to freeze when I heard Ladarius shout behind me.

"Brother, stop!"