I gripped the handle of my baseball bat and the can of bear mace tightly as I stared at the front door of my house.

With a gulp I opened the door and took shaking steps outside.

I made sure to school my features into a mask of indifference (something I learned early during my childhood therapy sessions) and faced the woods. The smiling dog can smell fear.

"HEY!" I shouted. "I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE, KNIFE GUY! AND I'M..." I gulped. "I'M NOT AFRAID OF YOU!"

No, I wasn't afraid of him. I was piss-my-pants terrified.

"S-SO DON'T TRY TO HURT DAWSON AGAIN!"

The words had hardly left my mouth before I was sprinting back inside and locking the door.

...

From just beyond the treeline, Jeff the Killer scowled, his arms crossed over his chest and his body leaning against a tree.

"Who's gonna stop me, bitch?" He growled lowly, a third knife gripped tightly in his snow white fist.

Not only was he pissed off at his comrades for finding enjoyment in her life, but he was also enraged by the fact that Kylie had dared to boil his favorite knife- the knife he had killed his family with- in holy water and keep it as if she owned it.

Jeff growled lowly once again at the thought and began to grind his teeth together.

"Fuck. That. Shit."

...

Dawson Green came to work late the following morning. Three hours late, to be exact.

The can of extra strength bear mace that Kylie had given him the day before sat heavily in the pocket of his jeans, reminding him that the day before hadn't been a dream at all.

With a heavy sigh, he made his way behind the register of Franklin's Hardware Store and waited for people to come to him.

Almost instantly a pale woman in a black hoodie wearing sunglasses and black lipstick came to the register, slapping a pack of gum on the counter.

"How did you find your experience with us today, ma'am?" Dawson drawled out the required question with little interest as he grabbed the gum.

"Good." The woman said with a smile, then leaned forward and rested her elbows on the counter. "Sooo... Dawson, huh?" She grinned. "Cute name for a cute kid. I'm Jane, by the way. You might know my... friend, Kylie Jones."

Instantly Dawson's eyes lit up. "You know Kylie? Is she okay!?"

Jane chuckled and held up her hand. "Take it easy there, Romeo. I just thought you should check up in her every now and again. See if she's doing alright. She's a young woman living alone in the woods after all. You never know what might happen."

With another grin the pale woman grabbed her gum and sauntered out of the store, waving behind herself as she did so.

"I plan on seeing you real soon, Dawson."

It was only after she had gone that Dawson realized he had forgotten to put on his name tag that morning.

As he stared after the woman in confusion, a hand slapped something down on the counter before him, making the poor boy jump and whip his head around so fast he almost got whiplash.

"Hundred bucks and you don't do whatever she said." A tall man with a yellow hoodie growled from in front of him.

The man was wearing a black ski mask with a red frowning face on it, so Dawson couldn't see who it was.

"What-?"

He was cut off as another man came up and slapped another bill on the counter. This one had a white mask with black eyes and lips.

"Two hundred. No romance."

Now Dawson was even more confused.

"What the-?"

Before he could finish, though, both masked men were exiting the store- leaving the two hundred dollar bribe behind them.

Dawson stared at the door, then down at the money, then back at the door.

"What the fuck?"

...

Night fell in the woods and with it the evening show came on for the Creepypastas.

The group laughed at moments when they heard Kylie's screams from inside the house as Ben Drowned scared the living daylights out of her, or when they saw her running around outside the house like a lunatic, spraying mace and swinging with her baseball bat at the laughing Link look-alike.

Jeff the Killer watched his comrades in disgust from high within a tree.

Killing people was one thing, but this was just stupid.

A plan had formulated in his head that morning- when Kylie had called out to him- and he would put it into play as soon as everyone left.

It didn't take too long for them to lose interest for the night, and soon everyone was heading back to Slenderman's mansion deeper in the forest.

With a grimace at what he was about to do, Jeff the Killer dropped to the ground and made his way to where he remembered Kylie's bedroom window to be.

The bars he had torn off only two days prior had been replaced by hurricane shutters that were just as easily disposed of.

Picking the window's lock, Jeff lifted the old wooden frame and took a cautious step inside, making sure to look where he was going instead of jumping in blindly like he did last time.

Manuvering his way through dozens of traps, the killer finally plopped down onto the bed- the seemingly only safe place in the room.

He could hear Kylie bustling about in the rest of the shack, so he sat back and waited for her to come to him.

The first thing Jeff the Killer saw when the door opened was a tinfoil cap, followed by the woman wearing it.

She didn't see him at first (too busy dodging her own traps), but when she did her eyes widened and she opened her mouth to scream, a can of bear mace at the ready.

Jeff stood immediately and jumped at her, slapping a hand over her mouth as they turned and crashed to the bed, pinning her arm to the mattress.

Kylie's muffled shrieks filled the room as she clawed vainly at her assailant with her free hand.

Jeff could see the whites of her eyes but not the color of them. Her pupils were dilated beyond belief and the killer nearly laughed at the oh-so-familiar indicator of fear.

The idea of stabbing her over and over again and carving a smile onto her face was extraordinarily tempting, but the man bit back the urge. That would come later.

"Listen." He ordered gruffly, but she just kept screaming.

"Listen! LISTEN! FUCKING LISTEN TO ME, DAMMIT!!"

Kylie Jones went limp immediately, staring up at him with wildly terrified eyes. Her body was trembling and sweat was beading up on her stupid perfect skin. God, he wanted to slice that skin up...

Jeff could see his own horrible reflection in those wide eyes of hers and he snarled again.

"I'm going to let go of your mouth, but if you scream again I'll fucking kill you." He snarled. Kylie nodded frantically and the man removed his white, leathery hand.

For a moment it looked as though she would scream again, but a fierce glare kept the poor woman silent.

Jeff let out a groan.

"Look, you may not know this, but the forest is full of monsters, demons, creatures- whatever the fuck you wanna call us, I don't really give a shit."

Kylie nodded. Of course she already knew that.

Jeff continued.

"And those monsters all watch you like you're some kind of reality show, or whatever. That's why they mess with you instead of just killing you."

Kylie's eyes were wide, but her pupils had contracted a bit which prompted Jeff to continue once again.

"I'm newer around here so they didn't tell me all this when I tried to kill you. Anywhore, I hate it and I wanna ruin their fun. I need your help with that, bitch. I'll tell you how to keep them away and you give me my knife back, deal?"

He held out a hand and Kylie (still very scared and very confused) gulped nervously.

"W-what ab-bout D-Dawson...?" She whispered, not trusting herself to speak any louder lest she burst out into tears. "W-will you k-kill him...?"

Jeff raised an eyebrow. "Who? You mean Tampons Guy? I honestly don't give a fuck about him."

Even through the thick fog of fear clouding her mind, Kylie managed to blush in embarrassment at the thought that a forest full of monsters saw that she had dropped her feminine products and a boy several years younger than she had to give them back.

Jeff watched her cheeks flush red and once again had to stifle the urge to slash that flawless skin to ribbons.

"Do we have a deal?" He asked huskily, trying to keep the snarl out of his voice.

Kylie stayed frozen for a few moments more. "This all seems to be leaning way to far in my favor." She stated, forcing her voice to be both louder and steadier. "What's the catch? What else do you want?"

'Your blood on my hands.' Jeff thought. Instead of voicing his desire, the man raised an eyebrow and grinned a little bit, forcing his carved smile to spread wider.

"Well, look who grew the balls to ask the big question! Ever thought about going to law school? I'm sure you'd do just great."

Kylie gulped. Sarcasm made the man's voice even more sinister than it already was.

"I-I'm terrified of lawyers..." She stated, voice dropping to a whisper once more.

Jeff shrugged then looked down into her eyes. God, he wanted to gouge those eyes out...

"I want a bag of junk food every day and a place to crash when the mansion gets too noisy."

Confusion swam in Kylie's eyes and Jeff sat back to hold out his hand.

"Deal?"

Against her better judgment, Kylie grasped his hand in her own trembling one and shook. "D-deal."

"I'm Jeff the Killer by the way."

"I-I'm Kylie Jones..."

"I know."